InuYasha Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Sunscrean and Cupcake Frosting ❯ Meeting ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Hello readers!
Well, it’s been YEARS since I last used ‘Alberiogurl’ as my screen name, but upon rereading my old fan-fiction, I have found that my writing back then was incredibly unprofessional, had a lack of empathy, and was chock full of ghastly grammar and terrible Mary Sue and OOC characters. I can’t believe I was so lost in the fandom in my head to not realize that my biggest fanfic, ‘I Wonder...” had too much happening, especially with Rina. Back then, I used to have the whole crossover universes in my head, and Rina was the center of it all. She was my alter ego in that world, and was everything I wasn’t and could ever dream of being. However, as a result, she was up there in the Mary Sue ranks. Disgusting, really. I still have an anime / Marvel, DC and Dark Horse crossover universe in my head, but have discontinued Rina as my alter ego. I now use an American teen named Cosette Hargreaves. But I digress. Which is something I failed to do countless times in the original fic.

So, my friend, the one mentioned throughout the original fic as Cory-chan (and one of the only people whoever voted) suggested I rewrite my old fan-fiction, clean it up, get rid of the majority of the causes of Rina’s Mary-Sue-dom, and incorporate a more... how should I say... not necessarily mature, but a better flowing, more intelligent writing style. After being thrown into the whirlpool of intense writing improvement since my middle school years, and thanks to my AP English Language class last year, I hope, now, as a high school senior, to rewrite this old piece of my fan history and make it much more enjoyable for all readers who stumble across it.

But first, I really need to have a heart to heart with all of my readers, past and present.

Please, I appreciate constructive comments, as I did back then. But I quote, “ITS STUPIDSTUPID OH AND U SPELLED LOATHE WRONG IMBICILE!!! aghh the most STUPID story ever STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID ETC. =] Oh and don't forget, that story was STUPID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! P.S. I'm better than you.” Or, “My tummy hurts badly,” have no positive benefits. It does not specify in a dignified manner on what I need to improve on, and frankly, it in itself is foolish. (Oh, and just so you know, while that particular reviewer said I spelt loathe wrong, (s)he spelt both ‘you’ and ‘imbecile’ incorrectly.) I highly doubt anybody on MediaMiner would like to have that review on their work, whether it is deserving of that or not. I’m sure every fanfic or original story on here has been put together by the writers’ hearts and souls, and even with different writing styles and maturity, every single one of them deserves some respect and understanding, especially for where the writers are in that particular point in their lives. All I ask is for my certain ignorant and rude readers are for them to push aside their immaturity and realize that their impertinence doesn’t have any affect on the writer improving. If they want the fanfic to be better, why do they insist on putting down the writer? By hurting the writer, they are, in turn, hurting themselves. If they don’t like a fan-fiction, there is no law saying that they must read it. Simple as that. Now that I’m older, and have had some pretty harsh editing on my college level schoolwork, I can take, “...she has no faults, it makes her boring. ” That, while blunt without any sweetening, isn’t completely negative in my opinion. So go ahead and review to you hearts’ content. I really do appreciate those who use their time to actually help the author. And those of you who liked my old work, I just want to say Thank You So Much. I sincerely hope that if you ever come back to reread them, that you get a chance to read the new version, and maybe even like it better than the original. :)

I hope you enjoy the revamped version of “I Wonder...”.

Love, always,
Alberio’s Girl,

Sun Screen and Cup Cake Frosting

The clouds silently rumbled across the sky.
It seemed as if mother nature was out sick with an upset stomach, since the sun never punched in his timecard.
As the girls listened, marbles of rain began to relentlessly barrage the roof of 14-year-old Rina Halimaru. The toe head sighed, as she cast a sleep deprived and weary glance at her two closest friends, AD and Eclari. AD responded with a yawn, and Eclari threw her drawing pencil across the floor in frustration.
“Damn, Rina. You’re the rich one out of all of us. Don’t you have somethingwe can do?”
Rina rubbed her tired eyes. “You’re the one who insisted on staying up last night and doing every ‘recreational activity’ I have,” Rina retorted with a smile, and fell back onto her bed with a ‘foomf’. “This sucks . . . AD brought over so much candy, munchies and soda that I couldn’t fall back asleep, even if I tried.” She then chuckled in spite of herself.
AD stood up and stretched her stiff limbs. “Hey, um, Rina?” she asked.
“Yes AD?”
“I’m bored.”
“Aren’t we all” grumbled Eclari.
In their state of boredom, the girls continued to sit there and listen to the storm thunder on outside.

Kirina “Rina” Halimaru was somewhat of a child prodigy in the eyes of many. From an early age, she was advanced in literature and music, although mathematics never quite tasted sweet on her pallet. For that reason, she took piano lessons for ten years and violins for six years. She was only an early-intermediate level on piano, hated counting out her music, and couldn’t play solely by ear. As for the violin, she preferred to call it a fiddle, on account that she wasn’t fond of playing orchestral pieces and was better suited to the freedom of playing Celtic and Irish jigs and reels. Societal wise, she was well off. She was pretty; fair skin, turquoise blue eyes, light blonde hair, an ‘early bloomer’ who believed early on that real women have curves. She was far from being a stick, and not afraid to clean her plate and go back for seconds or sometimes, thirds. Her family in itself was incredibly well off, owning a successful restaurant and high class boutique chain. She hated playing sports, finding them violent and was almost always on the wrong side of the PE equipment. Her only saving grace for her physical activity was DDR, archery, and a genetic mutation. I’m sure the majority of us here have watched “Catwoman” with Halle Berry. Well, that reality of the movie doesn’t affect us here, in our world, but it does affect Rina, in her world. She, too, was a Catwoman. However, she was clumsy, preferring to use her special senses to stay alive playing dodge ball or getting ahead in dance class. Dancing was something that seemed to come naturally to her, possibly from her increased flexibility and agility from the ‘cat gene’, as I call it, or from her best kept secret that she was dying to tell.
However, while Eclari and AD were her best friends, they were subject to the society that engulfed them, restrained them, and ultimately controlled what was socially acceptable. Knowing that, she had kept her secret to herself. But I digress. Rina wasn’t always afraid to ‘cheat’ with her heightened senses, as long as she knew she wasn’t going to get caught. At first, she seems like a goodie two shoes, polite with her head square on her shoulders, but in actuality, something only her closest friends knew, was that she could be rebellious, preferring the frilly petticoats of Lolita to the washed out jeans of Hollister and bikini strapped camis of Target to the trendy skater shoes of Vans.
Elizabeth Claire “Eclari” Julianni, on the other hand, came from a strict, Christian, upper-middle class family. It was hard for her to get out of the house, her parents questioning her every motive, even if it’s to walk down the driveway to get the mail for them. Luckily, they were as religious as shallow. Knowing that Rina’s family was wealthy and had connections to celebrities, politicians and locals alike, they plastered fake smiles and gave false wishes of welfare to the Halimarus in order to one day use Eclari and Rina’s friendship to their own advantage. Eclari was even denied a bedroom door, on account of her parents’ paranoia. As a result, Eclari was pushed to the ‘dark side of the force’, as she once called it. Elcari would faux-sleep until her parents were engrossed enough in a deep slumber that she could preform Wicka in secret. Now, although she joined ‘the dark side’, Eclari found its black magic too dangerous, too unpredictable for her to ever use it, and always stuck with the in-between stuff and white magic. Magic in itself is a strange thing. For those who believe, both are liberating and enslaving at the same time. It opens doors to new views on life, while it closes others. However, she was too smart to be closed minded, completely engulfed in her newfound freedom. Eclari was always open minded, from civil rights to women’s rights to gay rights. In order to maintain her hippy-ish ways of belief, Eclari only used Wicka as an escape from the suffocating onslaught that her parents’ religion and smothering brought her.
She was more than she seemed as well. The 13-year-old mischievous chocolate eyed brunette, thanks to her parents’ greed, was able to ‘go to Rina’s house for study buddies’ after school. By that, she meant ‘go to different sword fighting classes’. Over the few years that she and Rina had become friends, Eclari had unleashed a deadly hidden talent and passion of her own; sword fighting. Rapiers, katanas, long swords, short swords, swords from sci-fi movies, you name it, she’s skirmished with it. Along with that particular talent, she also used the ‘went to Rina’s’ freedom to take up bass guitar. If anyone could be a child prodigy, it would be Eclari, more so than Rina. In just two years, she has almost mastered the bass guitar. As for her looks, Elizabeth Claire preferred black, black and more black. Ah, yes, that stage of ’tween life where Hot Topic is heaven and Nirvana is God. One of her peculiar habits was to always wear a hat she got personalized at a fair that read ‘Jack Rox my Sox.’
Finally, there was 14 year old Aliadne (al-ee-add-nay) “AD” Beckah Cider. She came from an average middle class family, in an average neighborhood with average people. One of those ‘American Dream Suburbia’ places. Her family was fairly lenient with her, so long as she told them, where, when and with whom, for how long. She was a fairly good student, getting A’s and a few B’s with the occasional C when her class made absolutely no sense. Out of the three girls, she was the one that can find the clouds’ silver linings in a hurricane. It was incredibly hard to get this young lass down, for she made it a priority to find all the good in life whenever life gave her lemons. However, when life does give her lemons, her randomness and spontaneity allowed her to think outside the box and make apple juice. There wasn’t really all that much to say about her. For all we know, she could be your neighbor, school mate or sister. Out of the three girls, she fit into middle class society the best, from school, to a future job to a future ‘suburbia’ family. However, that was the problem. AD hated living in reality. The time not spent with her friends in their little world was mediocre at best, and a living miserable hell at worst. She once described it as drowning with a jar of mayonnaise on your head, while being stoned to death by pickles in a winter coat in Death Valley during summer. She spent the days in her room, with the door shut, dancing around like a fool, with her i-Pod up, while daydreaming about her own little crossover world. If she wasn’t doing that, she was ‘over at Rina’s house studying’, but in her case, her parents knew well that their daughter was out taking drum or tai kwon do lessons.

AD yawned again, followed promptly by Eclari and Rina.

“Goddamn, AD! Stop yawing! It’s effing contagious!” Eclari growled. If there was one thing mixed with Eclari that didn’t bode well, that would be lack of sleep.

“Byleh!” AD sounded, as she stuck out her tongue at her friend.

Rina rubbed her eyes while giggling at her friends’ antics. “Hey you two. It may be my house, but you’ve been here enough that you should consider it yours as well. If you want to do something, go ahead and decide.”

“Oh oh oh!” exclaimed AD. “We could write another song!”

“Psh, yeah, except for the fact we already did that today and have composers’ blocks, idiot,” snapped Eclari.


“Played that for three hours strait. My legs are going to feel that tomorrow.”

“Want to get some more food?”

“AD. Read my lips. We. Are. Full.”

“Um, want to draw?’

“ARGH! What do you think we’ve been trying to do for the past freaking hour?!”

AD clamped her mouth shut, slightly frustrated by Eclari’s lack of willingness.
A few silent minutes past.

“Eureka! I’ve got it!” Rina suddenly shouted, mimicking Danny Elfman, and startled the other girls out of their silent, pensive states.

“What?” AD chirped happily, thrilled at the prospect of a new activity.

“Well, let’s do what us anime amateur writers do best! Make a fanfiction, but all together!” Rina said giddily, with a new found energy.

Even Eclari’s heavy mood was lightened. “That sounds neat. A cross fertilization of our ideas . . . It might just spawn something really awesome.”

All three girls gathered around Rina’s laptop, unaware that soon their simple endeavor to please their otaku minds would lead to an amazing journey, that not only tested the strength of their individual hearts and wills, but their own friendship, and the friendships and romances that they would soon create.