InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Chronicles ❯ BakaYasha ( Chapter 30 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
“What do you mean, it's gone?” InuYasha asked, his tone, measured, clipped, way too calm. She could hear the underlying menace in his voice, and she renewed her efforts to locate the missing book.
Kagome started dragging things out of her bag as an almost hysterical panic gripped her. “I mean, it's not here!”
“Did you fucking bring it?”
She shot him a dark look. “Yes, I did,” she replied. “I distinctly remember putting it in here!”
“Keh!” he snorted. “You left it; I know you did!”
“Damn it, Kagome, can't you do anything without my help?” he bellowed, arm wrapped over his stomach. He'd rather scream at her than take care not to reopen his wounds . . .
But InuYasha's tirade wasn't finished. “Are you completely useless?”
She shoved everything back into her bag and stiffly stood.
“Oi, wench! Where the hell do you think you're going?”
Mustering as much dignity as she could, Kagome lifted her chin and blinked back upset tears. `Hold it together, girl! BakaYasha doesn't deserve to see you cry!' With that in mind, she drew a deep breath. “I'm going to go back and look! Since you're so convinced I can't do anything without you, maybe I can find the book alone.”
He didn't look very happy about her statement. His disgruntled expression shifted into `the pout'. “You're coming right back,” he warned.
“Will I?” she tossed back over her shoulder as she hurried out of the hut before breaking into a sprint toward the forest.
`Baka! Jerk! I know I packed it. I know I did! It doesn't matter what I do, he always yells at me!' she thought as she hurried along the path toward the Bone Eater's Well. `I'll show him! See if I ever come back! See how he likes that, the jerk! See how . . .' she swiped angrily at the tears that blinded her. `See how miserable I'd be.'
She swiped the back of her hand across her eyes again. The hurt made her angry, and the anger made her heart ache. Kagome reached the well in record time and vaulted over the side without pausing in her stride. “InuYasha no baka!” she yelled as the pink light opened up the time shift under her.
She landed on the bottom of the well on her side and took a deep breath to calm herself down before she ran into her mother and ended up having to make up something about why she'd been crying. `Tell her the truth . . . that BakaYasha is a jerk!'
She whimpered, shaking her head slowly as more tears welled up in her eyes. `But . . . he's just upset . . . I can't replace that diary . . . the last thing he has left from his mother, and I've misplaced it . . .'
The well was dark, and she shuffled her feet as she reached out to feel her way to the ladder. Her toe hit something, and a soft scrape echoed off the walls. Kagome frowned and reached into her bag, feeling for a flashlight in the darkness.
After what seemed like forever, she finally managed to locate the light and flicked it on. The beam bounced around the small space, and Kagome frowned as it landed on the old diary. `What's it doing here?' she wondered as she stooped to retrieve it. Relief rushed over her as she flicked off the light and started to pull herself up the ladder with one hand. She had her other arm wrapped securely around the book.
`I'd better go give him his mother's diary. I'll just come back. I could use a few days here, anyway.'
She pulled herself onto the edge of the well and let out her breath, feeling her bangs rise with the gust of air that escaped. `Just give it to him and go,' she thought with a wry grimace as she hopped off the ledge and into the fissure of light.
The soothing light wrapped around her, and Kagome felt some of her upset ebb away, but as the light closed over her, she suddenly realized that the book wasn't in her arms anymore, and she shook her head. “Where is it?” She had it. She knew she did . . .
As soon as her feet hit the bottom of the well, she dragged herself up the vines about half way. With a mental sigh, she pushed herself away from the wall and dropped, half expecting the warp to reject her for misuse, but the light returned, and for the fourth time of the day, she found herself surrounded in the pink glow.
She wasn't surprised this time, to find the diary lying at the bottom of the well. `It can't pass through,' she realized as she sank down, cradling the book on her raised knees. `How can I explain this? What am I going to tell InuYasha? Why can't the book pass through the well?'
Something she'd heard at school came back to her, and she frowned, staring at the diary in her lap. `The same matter cannot exist in the same plane . . . and if that's true, then that means the diary can't go through the well because, even if it is still lost in that place, it is still there . . . right? Because if it weren't still there, I wouldn't be holding it now . . .'
InuYasha's words came back to her, and she sighed. `Damn it, Kagome, can't you do anything without my help? Are you completely useless?'
A small sound, something between a groan and a sob escaped her just before Kagome smashed the back of her hand over her mouth. She stared at the diary, illuminated by the weak flashlight and made a face. `He did say I could read it,' she reasoned. `I've held up my side of the bargain. I'll just read a few pages before I go tell InuYasha . . .'
InuYasha hesitated a whole thirty seconds before pushing himself off the futon with a wince and a grunt of pain. Stumbling toward the door, strength of will was the only thing that made him shuffle his feet forward since his guts twisted in agony with even the slightest movement. `Bastard got me good,' he thought with a frustrated scowl.
“InuYasha!” Kaede chided as she stepped into the hut followed closely by Sango, Miroku, and Shippou. “Shouldn't ye be resting?”
“Yes,” Miroku agreed as he stepped forward and tried to force InuYasha back toward the futon. “Those are serious injuries.”
“Back the fuck off!” he snarled then flinched as pain shot through his guts. “Out of my way.”
Shoving off the monk's hands and glaring at the old miko before she could touch him, Sango alone stood between him and the doorway. “I don't think you should follow her,” Sango said coolly.
“I don't give a damn, what you think,” InuYasha remarked as he started to step around the exterminator.
Sango put her hand to his shoulder, stopping him in his tracks. “She looked very upset, InuYasha.”
“I'm going,” he said, controlling the urge to wince as another stabbing pain hit him. This one, however, wasn't in his stomach. This one was suspiciously close to his heart . . .
Sango stared at him for a long moment then conceded, stepping aside as InuYasha left the hut.
He had to stagger to the well, which only served to darken his already bad mood. He was only midway through the forest when Kagome's unmistakable voice reached him, “InuYasha no baka!” The sound was distorted—she was obviously already in the time slip—and he winced.
Seconds later, the air felt still, hollow, and an odd melancholy, a desolate emptiness surrounded him. It was like this every time Kagome left. As though the entire forest could sense the disturbance, InuYasha hated the idea that there were five hundred years separating the two of them.
He had just reached the empty meadow when light filtered from the well, and moments later, he could feel the welcoming aura that surrounded Kagome. Pushing himself harder, he stumbled forward only to drop to his knees in silent confusion as the light erupted again and Kagome's aura faded away. `What the hell? Why'd she come back and leave again?'
With a deep breath, InuYasha pushed himself to his feet once more, determined to get to the edge of the well. `I didn't mean that . . . I didn't mean any of it . . .' His ears flattened against his head as his shoulders slumped. With a sigh of relief, he sank down beside the well, forearms resting on the edge of the wall, chin dropping atop his folded hands, he stared into the darkness with a soft whine.
`My darling InuYasha,
`This is not so much a diary as it is a very long letter to you, my son, my angel. Things that I want you to know that, if the fates are willing, I will be able to tell you in person. In case it doesn't happen that way, I want you to know the story—the entire story, and I hope one day you'll understand. I pray that you will not make the same mistakes your father and I have made. I pray that you have the courage to fight for those things that may seem beyond your reach. I pray that you'll never need the words I'll impart to you here because I want your world to be filled with love and joy and peace. When I look at you, I see your father, and that is where I should begin. In closing, please know that there was never a time when I held you in my arms and in my heart that I did not love you, that there was nothing in this world I wouldn't give to see you smile, my son.
Kagome sniffled softly and wiped a tear off her cheek. She still had to wonder if InuYasha would be able to read this. The words his mother wanted to tell him . . . `Maybe I shouldn't read this,' she thought as she bit her lip. `Or maybe, if I do . . . maybe I can talk him into reading it, too.'
With a deep breath, she closed her eyes for a long moment then turned the page.
`I remember what I thought when I first saw him. Bearing so regal, so aloof, so calm and calculated in his every movement, and I remember thinking that he was . . . beautiful. Later I would come to recognize these traits in him as signs that there were dangers near. At that time and in that place, as the spring breeze carried with it the scent of the cherry blossoms, it didn't matter. Human, mononoke, youkai, whatever he might have been . . . to me, he was an unattainable dream.'
Kagome smiled faintly, recalling her own unattainable dream—the beautiful hanyou, pinned to Goshinboku by the miko's sacred arrow, eyes closed in fathomless sleep as his silvery hair billowed in the spring breeze, as the scent of cherry blossoms filling her nose as she gently tweaked those adorable ears . . .
`The centipede youkai bore down on me, telling me that she would feed me to her young. She tried to take me away with her, to her lair. He stopped her. He stepped into her path, and he drew his sword. It wasn't a remarkable sword. He said it was a simple blade, though he said at the time he'd never had a reason to have another forged. With this blade, he cleaved the youkai in half, and she dropped me. Before I could fall, he caught me. Staring into those eyes was like gazing too long into a fire. He asked me if I was injured, and after I assured him that I was not, he set me on my feet and told me to run. I did, but I stopped as I reached the shelter of the trees of the wood known as Inu no Taisho's Forest. Silly girl that I was, I didn't realize that he was this mysterious being, this Inu no Taisho. I looked back in time to see the centipede bite into his hand. I think I started running toward him, concerned as blood flowed from the wounds. He brought up his sword and yelled the words that I still hear in my heart, “You are not worthy of her!” though perhaps I was the one not worthy of him . . .
`The centipede was engulfed in flames that shot out from his hand. He had an affinity for flame, he told me later as I bandaged his hand. He touched my cheek, stroked my hair, and the sadness in his gaze made me want to weep. He told me that humans and youkai did not belong together. They were never meant to coexist, and that surely the humans would suffer for it. He looked as though this made him sad or angry, perhaps both. I remember, I thought I would have followed him anywhere, if he would only have asked it of me.'
`How many times have I followed after InuYasha?' Kagome wondered then sighed. Had Izayoi felt that way? She'd thought it before, that, though she worked to keep up in school and maintained a normal life on this side of the well, in her heart, she knew she wanted to be with InuYasha, wherever, whenever he chose to be. She smiled slightly but the smile turned sad as she thought with a whimper, `He's probably still mad at me, and he's hurt . . . I never should have let his words bother me so much!'
She gasped as the wells suddenly filled with pink light, and slowly InuYasha rose from the time slip. Looking as though he was ready to pass out, he didn't notice her right away as he leaned against the wall, breathing ragged and labored.
“Aaahh!” he shrieked, flattening himself against the wall as his ears smashed down against the sound of his own shock. “Damn, wench! Don't do that!” Suddenly he moaned and slid down into a slouch. “Why are you sitting in the well?”
“I found your mother's journal,” she answered. He started to open his mouth to gloat about being right in his assumption that she had left it behind, so she hurried on. “I didn't forget it. It can't pass through the time slip.”
Her eyes fell away as she sighed. He sounded as though he blamed her for the book not passing through the warp. She shook her head. “I think it can't because it still exists in your time,” she admitted softly, trying to keep the hurt out of her tone, the fresh ache that his irritation opened up deep down inside.
He shifted his position, stretching his legs out as he slumped back against the wall a little more. Kagome's chin rose, and she gasped. “Your injuries! Why didn't you stay behind and rest?” She dropped the book and crawled across the floor to kneel beside him. “Let me see,” she said gently, reaching to pull the haori open so she could check his bandages.
He slapped her hands back gently. “Get me out of here,” he mumbled.
“Okay . . . can you climb?”
Hurriedly she shoved everything into her bag and left it on the ground as she looped his arm over her shoulder and helped him to his feet. He shuffled over to the ladder with her help, and he slowly pulled himself up a few rungs.
Kagome cried out and dropped to her knees beside him when he fell. He landed with a dull grunt of pain and a hiss of expelled breath. “InuYasha . . .”
He shook his head and stubbornly pushed himself up again. “I'm fine,” he maintained. “Stay back, in case I fall again.”
Kagome didn't argue as she helped him over to the ladder. This time he managed to get out of the well. She grabbed her backpack and clamored up as quickly as she could.
He was sitting on the steps waiting for her. “Can you make it inside?” she asked, pushing his bangs off his forehead. He was sweating. She winced.
He tried to make his standard `keh!' The sound was weak. Kagome pulled his arm over her shoulder and helped him up again.
The trip between the well-house and the shrine had never taken so long. He was leaning heavily on her, and Kagome realized by the time they'd cleared the stairs out of the well-house that his haori was soaked in blood, and so was her side where he leaned on her. Deliberately ignoring it to stave back the rising tide of panic, she steeled her resolve. “Come on, InuYasha. We need to get you inside.”
She stopped every few feet to let him catch his breath. By the time they reached the doors, Kagome was near hysteria. The hanyou's face was pale, ashen, and he wasn't answering her at all, as though it was taking every last ounce of his strength, his determination just to keep moving.
Mrs. Higurashi looked about as close to fainting as Kagome felt, herself, when she came running to Kagome's hoarse cry, “Mama!”
“Sit him down on the sofa,” Mrs. Higurashi commanded gently, recovering from the initial shock of seeing her daughter covered in blood. She still didn't look as relieved as she should have when she realized that Kagome was unharmed and that all the blood had come from the hanyou.
InuYasha shook his head. “K'gome,” he mumbled.
“No,” Kagome argued. “That's all the way upstairs, and—”
“K'gome,” he muttered a little louder.
The women exchanged worried looks. Finally Mrs. Higurashi grabbed his free arm and, supported between mother and daughter, they got him up the stairs and onto Kagome's bed.
“Warm water, Kagome, and cloths, and don't forget the first aid kit,” Mrs. Higurashi said as she sat down next to InuYasha. She reached to pull open the blood soaked clothing.
InuYasha grabbed her hands, pushed them back. “K'gome.”
Mrs. Higurashi nodded and got up. Kagome sank down beside him in her mother's place while her mother went to fetch the items herself.
Despite her resolve not to worry InuYasha, she couldn't help the little whimper that came out when she managed to get his clothes pulled aside. His white undershirt was the same scarlet as his haori, and the bandage she had applied to his wounds earlier were dripping with blood. She brought her trashcan over and dropped it in.
Mrs. Higurashi hurried in with the warm water and clean cloths while Kagome set to work cleaning out the wound again. InuYasha seemed to have passed out. Eyes closed, he didn't even wince as she moved aside bits of torn flesh to clean underneath. The wound was deep, and in all his moving around, InuYasha had torn even more of his stomach open. “What happened?” Mrs. Higurashi asked in a whisper.
Kagome's voice was oddly calm, almost unattached, as she answered her mother. “A hawk youkai attacked. He caught InuYasha with his talons.”
When Kagome spared a glance at her mother, she was surprised to see tears standing in Mrs. Higurashi's eyes. Catching her daughter's gaze, she brushed a hand over her eyes and forced a smile. “I'll draw you a bath, dear, and I'll make up some tea.”
Kagome turned back to InuYasha as her mother hurried from the room. `Coming after me and climbing that ladder must have reopened all these wounds,' she thought. `I shouldn't have left him like that . . . I knew he was badly injured, and I should have known he'd come after me . . .' she blinked back tears as she carefully cleaned him. “Oh, InuYasha . . . I'm so sorry.”
“No,” he whispered. She gasped. She hadn't realized he'd regained consciousness. “It's . . . my fault . . . `InuYasha no . . . baka'.” She choked out a laugh, and he did, too. His weak laugh turned into a groan, and hers turned into a sob. “Keh . . . pathetic . . . wench.”
She wiped her tears on her shoulders as she bandaged him and gently pulled his arms out of his clothes. “I'll wash these,” she said, tugging them out from under him and dropped them on the floor. She took a clean cloth and wiped off his face before leaning down to kiss his forehead. “Go to sleep, InuYasha.”
She got up to gather his things to wash. His hand wrapped around her wrist and pulled her back down. “Stay?” he mumbled as his eyelids dropped closed.
Kagome sighed as she idly rubbed his ear. “I'll stay.”
InuYasha woke slowly, blinking in the semi-darkness of the familiar pink bedroom. `Kagome's room . . . Damn, I hurt . . .' With a grimace, he turned his head to the side. Kagome was curled up beside him, her head cheek smashed against his shoulder. He smiled despite the pain in his body.
Carefully, he forced himself to roll to the side, trying not to disturb Kagome as she slept. His head felt fuzzy and dull. He vaguely remembered Kagome giving him some little white pills. She said they'd ease his pain. His first reaction was to tell her that he didn't want or need them, but he had taken them because she looked so anxious . . .
He sniffed then wrinkled his nose. The smell of those pills still filled his nostrils. He made a face and sighed.
Pushing himself up on his elbow, he stared at Kagome. Dark smudges under her eyes marred the skin on her face, and he winced, knowing that it was because of him that those were there. She worried too much. She always forgot that it wasn't so easy to kill a hanyou. `Stubborn wench . . . why does just looking at her make my heart ache?'
She frowned slightly, as though her dreams disturbed her. He reached out and lightly smoothed her brow, dissipating the tiny lines that marked her upset. She sighed softly.
She moved in her sleep, and he gazed downward then scowled. She wore the same snowy white sweater she had been wearing all day, but he white was marred with . . . he narrowed his eyes. Dried blood? Before he gave it a second thought, he sat up and gently pushed up her sweater. Her flesh was warm, pulsing under his hand. She shifted slightly. The uncoiling of the muscles under her skin shot straight through him, and despite the hazy state of his mind, he couldn't help the sudden rush of fire that coursed through his veins.
`Baka! Did you forget that she's got blood on her?' He winced at his own reminder and drew a deep breath before daring to look at her again. `Nothing . . .?' Ignoring the pain in his stomach, he leaned over, sniffing the stain. Though the scent that came to him was dulled by those damned white pills, he recognized the smell. He snorted as he sat back up and let her sweater drop back in place. It was his blood . . . `That's the last time I take any white pills,' he assured himself as he laid back down.
Kagome yawned and slowly opened her eyes. When she noticed that he was awake, she leaned up on her elbow, the relief obvious in her timid smile. “How are you feeling?”
He didn't answer. Instead he tucked his chin down against his chest and pushed his head closer to her. She giggled softly and rubbed his ears. He grimaced as a dull pain twisted his stomach. Kagome noticed and frowned. “Why don't you lie on your back? That can't be comfortable.”
He rolled onto his back and sighed. “More.”
Kagome shook her head slowly but leaned over him to rub his ears.
`All right . . . bad idea,' InuYasha realized as Kagome's body pressed against him. `Baka! This is gonna kill me . . .' He whined. “Kagome?”
She dragged her gaze off his ears, questions in her eyes as they locked with his. Deliberately shoving away the doubts, the worries, he caught her, leaned up as he pulled her down. The instant explosion as their lips touched forced a growl from deep inside him. Her fingers sank into his hair as the flood of her light illuminated the darkest corners of his heart. In those secret places where he tried to conceal himself, she was merciless, drawing him out of hiding, leaving him vulnerable yet protected. Long after he thought that the beautiful things were gone from his life, she had come to him, and as her lips yielded on his, giving him everything she had to give . . . was it wrong for him to want a little more?
Kagome sighed against his mouth, accepted him on his own terms. She took what he offered and gave it back to him. A rare and delicate thing, unafraid when she should fear, more concerned with giving than taking, InuYasha let her humble him in this, let her have what she needed from him. Her lips opened to him, shocking heat from her mouth scorched him. He tasted her, reveled in her, lost himself in her. Time gave way to pure sensation; thought gave way to his need to shelter her. His hands cupped her face, traced the delicate curves of her skin. Softer than anything he'd ever felt before, her hair fell over him, wrapped around him, surrounded him in everything that was Kagome.
She shifted slightly, brushing against the bandages on his chest. He tore his mouth away as he gasped, white-hot pain instantly drawing him rudely back to his senses. “I'm sorry!” Kagome said quickly, obviously snapped out of her bemusement by the same thing that he had been victim of. “I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm—”
He forced a weak laugh as the edges of pain subsided. “I'll live, wench.”
She sat up and gently pulled the tape on the bandages to check his wounds. He didn't miss her wince as she took in the sight of his rent flesh. She let the bandage fall and crawled off the end of the bed. “Let me change that,” she offered.
He sighed. He hated how she constantly fretted over him. It made him feel weak when she did that. He made a face. `Liar. You love how she worries over you. No one's done that, not since Mother . . .'
He allowed himself a small grin. `All right,' he reluctantly agreed. `So I do like it . . . a little . . .'
Mononoke : creature spirit.
To date, InuYasha's father has no real name. His `title' was Inu no Taisho, so for this reason, most entries in Izayoi's diary will not call him by any name whatsoever!
== == == == == == == == == ==
Blanket disclaimer for this fanfic (will apply to this and all other chapters in Chronicles): I do not claim any rights to InuYasha or the characters associated with the anime/manga. Those rights belong to Rumiko Takahashi, et al. I do offer my thanks to her for creating such vivid characters for me to terrorize.