InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Dashed Hopes ❯ What Have I Done? ( Chapter 13 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Bad mood---dark chapter---put two and two together. But I guess it's semi-sweet at one point or another. Enjoy!

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

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Dashed Hopes

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--- Last Chapter ---

By the time they left the car, Kagome and Inuyasha had sworn never to listen to Miroku’s personal song ‘Koharu’s Gone!’ the rest of their living lives.

--- End of Last Chapter ---

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Chapter 13: What have I done?

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Kagome awoke that night in terror. A layer of cold sweat covered her shivering body and her frantic mind tried to remember her dream.

But only bits and pieces of it floated through her cluttered mind. The murder, the jewel, the run, and Naraku’s voice. But this time, the dream was slightly altered, but not in a good way.

Her mother and Jiisan, grandfather, were in it. So were her three friends, Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi, who she hadn’t seen since she had met Naraku. But that wasn’t the bad part, of course.

As the five warned her and tried to give her advice on how to get out of the situation, Naraku arrived ‘to get rid of the obstacle’, as he called her. Her family and friends surrounded her like a shield and took the brunt of the attack.

The last fragment of the dream Kagome remembered was of her dear ones lying on the cold ground surrounded by their own blood, their eyes open and lifeless.

Kagome covered her face with her hands and tried to block out the terrifying images. Slowing her breathing down to a normal pace, the young woman climbed out of bed and made her way to bathroom just on the other side of Inuyasha’s room.

Taking a deep breath, she turned the stream to a steaming hot source and climbed in.

Inuyasha was the only one, other than her, that slept in this hallway of the Youkai’s home. She doubted the sound of running water would awaken someone who seemed like such a deep sleeper.

Kagome smiled. Hot showers always helped calm her down and clear her mind so she could think a little straighter. This time, that wasn’t a good thing.

Kagome bit her lip as things came floating back to her.

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Naraku sat next to her on a stool beside her bed. He reached out to hold her fragile hand in his large, callused one.

“It will never happen again,” he soothed his love into a deep sleep. “Never, never again.”

Kagome looked up at him with love filled eyes before drifting off, and believed him.

‘Never again,’ she whispered in her head.

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Kagome stiffened at his touch. “Naraku?” she ground out breathlessly, knowing the answer.

“Yes, my sweet Kag, it’s me.”

“W-what are y-you d-d-doing here?” Kagome tried, and failed, to keep her quiet voice steady.

“To get back what’s mine,” he whispered as he stroked a finger up and down her side.

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Sighing Kouga broke the news; “He’s here, Kagome. He’s in Tokyo.”

Kagome smiled, “A bit late for that Kouga. He already found me.”

Kouga winced at her words, and anger filled his ice blue orbs. “Did he touch you?” he spat out, disgusted with each word.

Kagome shook her head. “I didn’t see him. He talked to Souta and Shippou.”

Kouga got even angrier, if that was possible. “Did he touch them?”

Kouga loved Souta like a little brother.

“No, he never has,” Kagome said quietly.

Kouga nodded, relieved. “Good.”

Kagome asked timidly, “Did he...?”

Kouga nodded. “I was here to check up on you. To tell you I covered all of your tracks back home, but he found me first.”

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More came back into Kagome’s thoughts and memories. All that Naraku had done.

“And all that I have done, too,” Kagome whispered out loud.

‘I allowed it to happen! Me being with Naraku brought this all on! If I had only gotten out sooner, or made him happier, everything would be ok. Everyone would be ok.’

“What have I done?” Kagome asked aloud as tears streamed down her face, mixing with the water from the showerhead.

Leaning forward she pounded a fist against the glass side of the massive shower. Her knees buckled and Kagome had to lean against the shower to support her weight. Sliding down, she landed in a lump at the base of the wall.

“What have I done?”

Curling into a small ball, Kagome continued to cry as the hot water swam around her small and broken form.

“What have I done?” She whispered once more as she gave into her tired mind and just fell asleep.

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Inuyasha woke up with an extremely dry throat. Grumbling he crawled out of bed to go grab a glass of water.

Walking down the hall, he stopped at the bathroom. Checking the grandfather clock at the end he recognized the time as 3am.

Someone was taking a shower. Someone was taking a shower---at three o’clock in the morning!

He tapped irritably on the door to make sure the person was all right. It was Kagome, he knew. No one else would be insane enough to take a shower at the time of night –er- morning.

When no one answered, the ebony haired male grew confused.

Screwing his eyes shut (he’s not that big of an ass!) Inuyasha walked in and called out, “Hey Kag! You doing all right? Need a drink?”

No one answered.

Risking it, he cracked open an eye, only to see the shower empty.

“Damn it! No one understands how much water costs! You cant just leave a shower running,” He continued to mumble as he reached in and twisted the knobs to off.

Inuyasha’s eyes widened as he looked down.

There was Kagome, curled up in the fetal position, sound asleep, in the bottom of his shower.

“You really are insane!”

A large sigh later, and an unwakeable Kagome, Inuyasha walked out of the bathroom with a soaking T-shirt and a towel wrapped woman in his arms.

Irony.

She wasn’t even awake to enjoy it!

‘Poor girl,’ Inuyasha tsked in his mind, ‘Doubt she’ll ever get into another position like this again!’

After tucking the sopping wet girl under her fluffy sheets, Inuyasha crept back to his room, midnight drink forgotten.

And with one amazing ego boost.

‘She owes me again!’ he tallied as his mind drifted off to sleep.

The thought of him giving the poor girl the closest spot to a romantic, exotic, encounter and her being asleep was enough for him to rest easy.

He really needed his brain checked if he was the one calling Kagome insane.

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“Hey! Where’s Kagome?” Souta asked the two other males and one girl as he shoveled cereal into his mouth.

The night before, Kagome had promised to take her small family with her to work.

Inuyasha shrugged, the night event already pegged as a dream.

“S-S-Souta!” Yelled a red ball of hair as it shot up onto the counter.

“What?”

“Its Kagome!”

Souta stopped and looked at his ‘nephew’. “What about her?”

Shippou twisted his hands. “She doesn’t look so good. She’s pale and yelling and she won’t wake up!”

The business brothers looked at one another. Not good.

“Kagome?” Sesshoumaru asked as he walked into her room.

She didn’t answer.

Looking down at her, he realized something was wrong.

Kagome’s milky skin was paler than being healthy should allow, her black hair almost made her face look pure white. Her lips were chewed and bleeding, and her silky waves were twisted and fanned out on the pillow behind her head. Her face was moist and damp hands twisted the fabric of the comforter.

“Well?” Inuyasha asked, laid-back, from the doorway.

“Call that friend of yours, the female.” Sesshoumaru commanded in his no nonsense voice.

“Yeah, sure,” Inuyasha said as he took out his handy dandy notebook –er- cellphone!

“Hey Sango!” --- “Yeah, its me.” --- “I don’t know” --- “Um, well, she’s not in the best of shape at the moment, that’s why I don’t know.” --- “If I knew why she looked like crap, I’d tell you!” --- “Just call that Keade woman.” --- “Sure.” --- “Yeah, bye.”

“Sango has that medicine woman coming by!” Inuyasha announced. Of course no one listened, as they were all busy crowding around the unconscious woman.

Even Sesshoumaru, if more for curiosity than being worried.

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Inuyasha wandered back in after Keade announced that the problem with Kagome was not known.

Yeah, big help.

Sitting next to Kagome, as it was the only quiet occupied room and Inuyasha needed both quiet and company, he sat back.

“Didn’t strike me as one to catch a fever.” He told her.

“SHUT-IT!”

Her scream caused Inu to fall off his chair in surprise and alarm. Cautiously he climbed back up, only to find her still sleeping.

“Right.”

“Its my fault Naraku! It always has been,” was her next outburst, still fast asleep.

“Somehow I doubt that,” Inu told her.

“You cant have it!” Inuyasha had heard this one before. “It’s not even yours to begin with! Why’d you do it, Naraku? We could have been happy!” This one surprised him, since when could a woman be happy with a psychopath?

“Next,” Inuyasha commanded. At least this was keeping him from being bored.

“All that blood. Why Naraku?” She whispered as she rolled over to face Inuyasha. “So much blood, all over. The floor, the walls, you,” her voice faded out as she listed the bloody items in her feverish talking.

“Maybe we should get you sick more often,” Inuyasha suggested. “I get more information this way. Whose blood?” He urged her on.

Kagome frowned, as if trying to remember a far off dream. “The men’s. Two of them,” she answered, delirious in her fever induced sleep.

Inuyasha frowned. He expected her to say it was her blood, or even his, if she’d had the courage to hit Naraku back. Now it sounded like there was more to it than an abusive relationship and some stolen property.

“Murder?” Inuyasha asked in a stage whisper.

Kagome nodded furiously. “Both of them dead before they hit the floor.”

“How?”

Kagome chewed her split lip even more. Should she tell him? Of course, Inuyasha was a symbol of safety and a new life for her. Even if he was an arrogant rude symbol. “A gun.”

“Who?”

“Naraku.” That didn’t surprise him.

But the next part did.

“And me.”


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“Do you think she helped with the murder?” Inuyasha asked as he ran a hand through his hair.

Miroku seemed to be deep in thought. Inuyasha had told the man of his conversation with their new friend, but not Sango. Being with the government had given the monks’ descendent a good head for figuring out weird situations.

“Perhaps.” He said finally. “We don’t know Kagome well enough to know if she would help with a murder. Naraku may have forced her, or she might have done it on her own.”

Inuyasha glared at the man. His lavender eyes boring a hole into Mr. Houshi’s head, he growled, “Kagome wouldn’t do that. She’s too good of a person.”

Miroku was taken back by his friend’s determination in the matter. Inuyasha seemed so sure at his conclusion; he didn’t even notice his seemingly complete trust in the woman who had walked into their lives only two weeks before.

It seemed so true and deep; that Miroku saw that he, too, trusted Kagome, and that Inuyasha was right.

“She must have meant something else,” Miroku said gently.

The fire went away in Inu’s eyes and the men continued to sit outside Kagome’s room.

The thrashing in the room behind them was beginning to slow, as the fever grew worse.

Sango found the boys in deep thought and said gently, “Keade says that Kagome’s body is under so much stress at everything that she was weak enough to contract the first illness that she came in contact with. Lucky for Kagome, the illness is not a bad one and should be out of her system in a day or two.”

Worry lines smoothed out at the last comment.

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Kagome turned and tossed in restlessness.

“My fault,” she whispered over and over again.

The blood and the men’s horrified eyes played over and over again in her memory. The warm liquid rushing out in all directions, the crimson reaching all corners. Drops and splatters on the wall, and the lifeless eyes.

The eyes were always the worst, full of hatred and betrayal.

Gaping holes in their bodies!

Things that once were an every day part of life now spilling out to mark death. Hearts no longer beating, blood no longer moving, and lungs no longer expanding in breath.

Dead, they were dead, and Kagome could have stopped it. If she had kept quiet or had never shown up, those two men would be alive today.

She could have knocked the gun out of Naraku’s hands or have thrown her self in the bullets path, or...anything!

Anything to have not to have seen two lives taken before her very eyes. Anything to have stopped all this running and hiding.

Her fault. Not just Naraku’s, but her fault too.

“What have I done?” her whisper asked the night.

“WHAT HAVE I DONE?” she yelled out in her troubled sleep. And the man, still awake, sitting at her side, couldn’t answer.

He didn’t know what she had done to cause her such terrible nightmares and stressful situations.

“But you did save your brother and son, find a job that you are amazing at, and bring a little light and joy into many people’s lives.” Inuyasha whispered to sooth the distraught Kagome.

He didn’t know why he was able to calm her down. But he knew he could, so he felt like it was his job to protect her.

It just seemed right.

Kagome really had become his friend.

And Sango and Miroku would have their backs because she had become friends with them. They would do all they could to protect Kagome too.

Inuyasha just hoped it would be enough.

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Dream

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“Hey sweetie,” her mom called from the kitchen.

“Hi mom!”

Kagome walked into the sweet smelling kitchen and dropped off her oversized yellow school backpack on the table.

Skipping over to look over her mother’s shoulder at the cooking food Kag ended up shouting in joy. “Oden! Oden! Oden!”

Mrs. Higurashi laughed, a joy filled sound. “You’ve had a long day at school. I thought it’d be nice to have a treat for dinner. How’d your math test go?”

Kagome collapsed on a kitchen chair and bit a huge chunk out of her apple. “Ok, I guess. I hate math,” she admitted.

Laughter followed the comment.

“Hello, dear granddaughter,” Jiisan greeted as he came in wearing his standard shrine keeper outfit: untied hamaka pants and a kimono shirt.

“Hey,” Kagome answered as Souta joined them too.

Kagome glanced down at her school uniform and decided it was time to change. Her apple green pleated skirt, white blouse, and sailor collar were just not right for an evening at home.

The overly fed Buyo followed in her wake.

Shutting her door, a scream suddenly filled Kagome’s ears. Leaping back out into the hall, Kagome raced down the stairs.

In the kitchen was her slack mother on the ground and standing protectively over her was Jiisan.

“Be gone!” He screamed before being shot in the same way as his daughter.

Kagome screamed, a sorrow filled sound.

Souta ran out the door to try and escape, but only in vain as another shot rang out and the young boy fell at Naraku’s hands.

“You bastard!” Kagome shrieked as she pounded outside and grabbed a set of a bow and arrows. Whipping around she raised the wooden weapon and aimed.

The arrow’s tip aligned with Naraku’s heart, and Kagome let the staff fly.

But just as the arrow pierced his chest, it wasn’t Naraku anymore.

It was a silver haired, dog-eared, golden-eyed Inuyasha.

He was thrown back into the wooden base of Kagome’s childhood climbing tree. Inuyasha was pinned there.

Kagome’s tears fell unchecked and she crawled on her hands and knees and looked up into the clouded eyes.

Gold darkened into purple and silver into black.

“Kagome.”

Eyes slowly slid shut as Inuyasha drifted off into a poisoned sleep, one where he could never be awakened.

And Kagome sobbed, knowing it to be her fault.

Inuyasha was gone forever.

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Reality

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“NO!”

Inuyasha sprang up to comfort Kagome. When his words didn’t work he wrapped his arms around her frail form in a desperate attempt to calm the girl.

But Kagome refused to be calmed.

She knew what the odd dream meant. She knew.

Kagome may end up betraying her friends to get to Naraku.

She would end up betraying Inuyasha.

And she no longer felt that that could be helped.

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Tell how my attempt at darkness was, please. I’d really like to know if I gave this story the right genre too. Review and ja ne!