InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Drifting ❯ Instinct ( Chapter 14 )

Instinct

 

Kagome's breath caught in her throat when she saw InuYasha standing by the well house. She had just left Hiroshi by the shrine steps, and InuYasha was the last person she expected to see after what he had said to her earlier. He was completely calm, gazing at her with the slightest trace of curiosity. Kagome was first reminded of everything that had happened recently, but as she approached him, drawn in through his eyes, everything melted away. He didn't move when he saw her, and only spoke to say softly, “Are you ready to go?”

 

Kagome was jarred back into reality. She shook her head guiltily and shrank away from him. “I'll be back in a minute,” she said, retreating to her house before he could ask what she had been doing for the past few hours.

 

Baka, she said to herself, You are such a baka. You just want to fall into his arms and let him take care of everything. Do you think he even wants you anymore? She darted up to her room, hoping her family wouldn't hear her, and started stuffing her bag with clothes, barely paying attention to what she was packing.

 

When she went back outside InuYasha was still leaning against the wall, this time looking slightly impatient. He quickly blanked his expression when he saw her.

 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked, “I mean, are you sure you want to go after the youkai?”

 

She looked down at the ground, feeling her will waver. It won't solve anything, will it. But I… I don't care. I'm just so… angry. She lifted her chin in a high arrogant manner, and nodded at him once. He nodded back at her, and they traveled through the well together.

 

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What took you so long, Kagome? InuYasha wondered for the hundredth time. Where were you coming from when you saw me at the well? He couldn't ask her. Seeing her mournful face and knowing he couldn't fix it was enough to make him want to tear the earth to pieces. He felt that if he lost control of himself at all he would shatter the world and Kagome along with it.

 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked Kagome, for probably the tenth time that day. No matter how he spun it to himself, he couldn't see Kagome going after anyone in revenge. Even after he had spent a year with her in his own quest for revenge, he knew that Kagome would have simply taken the shards off of Naraku instead of help destroy him if she had had her way. I thought I knew you so well, Kagome. Was I blind to you? Or have you changed so much suddenly?

 

She looked him directly in the eyes and said, “Yes. I am sure.”

 

He nodded, blowing out the breath he had been holding. Even now, even when he disagreed with her, he was still amazed by her. “I asked Sango where to look for them, but she said she had never heard of any taka tribe as powerful as these were.”

 

“Fine,” Kagome said, and simply started walking without a specific direction in mind. InuYasha jumped in front of her.

 

“Where are you going?” he demanded.

 

“You said that we don't have any hints to help us, so we'll just have to find him without any.”

 

“Kagome-“

 

“No! I'm going, InuYasha. I won't wait here any longer.”

 

“They need us, Kagome.” InuYasha knew that this was a losing argument. What he didn't know what why he felt wrong about leaving. His first reaction was to seek revenge, but seeing Kagome so adamant about it was making him rethink his instincts.

 

“They didn't need you when you were pinned to a tree all those years,” Kagome said, “They didn't need us when we were searching for Naraku. Why now? Why do they suddenly need us now? Why do you suddenly need to stay behind when I need you? Kami, I need you, InuYasha.”

 

InuYasha refused to look at her, setting his jaw. This was wrong, he knew this was wrong. Kagome let out a little angry puff of air, and walked off. InuYasha opened his mouth to stop her, but was distracted as a tall, proud youkai strode into the clearing. The youkai paused, without seeming to see either Kagome or InuYasha.

 

“There is the scent of death here,” Sesshoumaru said, seemingly to himself.

 

“What do you want, Sesshoumaru?” InuYasha growled at him.

 

“The scent of hawks, as well,” Sesshoumaru said, as a little girl and a small toad burst out from the undergrowth. Sesshoumaru glanced down at them and simply said, “Come.” They walked past InuYasha.

 

“Wait,” InuYasha said to Sesshoumaru's retreating back. “Sesshoumaru-”

 

“Stop!” Kagome cried, darting in front of Seshoumaru and planting herself firmly. The youkai stared down into her face. Kagome swallowed hard. “Please, my friends…”

 

Sesshoumaru's hand dropped to the hilt of tenseiga. He turned to face InuYasha and said, “It's too late. The monk sent them on. There is nothing I can do.”

 

InuYasha punched the ground as Kagome sank to her knees. “But the taka…” she said, “Do you know where they are?”

 

Sesshoumaru walked around her but paused when he was directly behind her. “I have heard of a tribe of taka that resides in the North,” he said without turning around. He strode quickly away with Jaken and Rin in his wake. Kagome squeezed her eyes closed, unwilling to cry again.

 

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You taught me this, Kaede. I should have done it more, but I'll try now. I just need to empty my mind.

 

But Kagome couldn't empty her mind completely. She had replaced her sorrow with anger, bitter anger over the loss of her friends, her family. She knew she was becoming irrational. But it was easier to let herself slip into her aura. Then she could see her natural enemies, those who opposed her aura…

 

InuYasha glanced over at Kagome. She was sitting cross-legged on the ground, controlling her breathing in slow, measured breaths. He had seen her do it a couple of times before, though only when she was forced to by Kaede. He cautiously sniffed the air, checking for any signs of dangerous youkai, and satisfied with his scan, left to go find dinner.

 

He stopped by a stream and scanned the water for fish. Timing it perfectly, he snatched one out of the water with his claw. He reflected on how little Kagome had been eating recently and decided that tonight he would force her if he had to.

 

He had already known that there was nothing that Sesshoumaru could have done. Even if Miroku had not sent their souls, it would still be too late for them. He snatched another fish out of the water. Still, as long as there was the chance, he knew he couldn't let it go. I didn't expect Kagome to throw herself in front of him, though, he thought darkly. Kagome no baka… InuYasha no baka.

 

When he returned with the gutted fish ready to be cooked, Kagome was deep in her meditation with a slight pink radiance around her. InuYasha set the fish over their little fire and stared at her. Even though the effects of her grief were still apparent, she looked beautiful and peaceful in the dusky glow. A cold breeze blew in and flung her hair around, but she didn't stir. The gust hit the fire and InuYasha tore his eyes away from Kagome to build it back up as the cold night air settled in.

 

The smell of cooked fish brought Kagome back into herself. She slowly opened her eyes and looked across the fire straight into InuYasha's eyes. He stood up and grabbed a piece of fish to hand to her. She took the fish, but didn't eat it. She was never hungry after her meditation, though she knew she would be later. InuYasha glared at the fish in her hand, obviously annoyed at her reluctance to eat it.

 

“Save it for me,” she said, standing up and stretching. “I'm going to go take a bath.” She paused and looked around, slightly disoriented.

 

“There's a hot spring a little bit in that direction,” InuYasha said, jerking his thumb behind him. Kagome nodded and let her head drop to InuYasha's chest for a minute, breathing in his scent, before going to find the spring.

 

She sank into the water, wondering why she thought that a hot spring would wake her up at all. She sighed happily and wondered if InuYasha would find her if she just fell asleep in the water. Suddenly she snapped her head up. Did I just… she groaned a little when she realized what she had just done. But it seemed so natural… She hung her head. I miss the way he smells.

 

When Kagome returned to the campsite, InuYasha stared at her with cautious eyes. She picked up some of the fish that InuYasha had left for her and started to eat. He seemed satisfied enough with that, and turned away from her to stare into the forest.

 

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Sango was working on the garden very meticulously, carefully handling each plant, examining the ground for the tiniest green hint of a weed, and checking every single leaf of each plant for a sign of sickness. She kept telling herself that she was only going through this painstaking procedure in order to assure a good crop of vegetables, since food was going to be a little scarce for a while.

 

“You know, if you take any better care of those plants they'll forget how to do it themselves,” Miroku commented, peering over at her labor.

 

“Slacking off again, Miroku?” Sango asked without looking up. She had found a particularly rooted weed.

 

“Me, Sango? Never.”

 

Sango yanked at the weed in complete frustration, and when it came out she fell backwards with the force of her movement and landed on her back.

 

“Seems to me that you are taking a little rest now, also. Which is just as well, since I was hoping that we could go on a walk together.”

 

Sango sniffed and righted herself. “Not all of us have the luxury of goofing off all day,” she said, moving to another patch of plants. Miroku blocked her path.

 

“And some of us can't just throw ourselves into our work and pretend nothing else exists in the world but a small patch of garden.”

 

“I'm not pretending anything,” Sango said, trying to move around Miroku. He wouldn't budge.

 

“Then you shouldn't be blocking out life.”

 

Sango's inhalation sounded like a hiss. “Life, Miroku? Life? Look around. We're surrounded by graves.”

 

“You can't stop living just because others died. It wasn't your fau-”

 

Sango cut him off. “Don't say it, Miroku. Don't you ever lie to me.”

 

Miroku looked her in the eyes and said very slowly and deliberately, “It's not your fault. And until you stop blaming yourself, you can't move on. It wasn't your fault.”

 

Sango stared at him angrily and stomped off. Miroku closed his eyes and shook his head sadly. He knew he would find her later keeping vigil at Kirara's grave. He also knew that he couldn't fill the space of her long time friend, or stop the hurt. How can I help you, Sango?

 

 

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AN: Sorry for the delay on this chapter… and the shortness, but I had a concussion and then post concussion syndrome. I'm fine now… but that was an intense period of headaches.

 

Sueric:

I gotta tell you, I don't like Hiroshi. I think maybe because he's so .... Houjou-esque... LOL Nice guys, you know... LOL, though he does seem to have a very good way of dealing with Kagome, and that seems to be what she needs at the moment. Awesome chapter, as usual. Stupid formatting issues, I know your pain. Very nice, I'm so enjoying your angsy goodness, and I really look forward to more. Your writing style is compelling to read and getting better all the time (I say that every time, don't I? Too bad! It's true!) I'm intrigued with the Sango developments and can't wait to see where you go with that. Seems very foreboding, and that is just a delightful thing! Ok, now that you've jerked me away from work (LoL, Like I'm complaining!) Just want to reiterate how much I'm enjoying your fic! Update when you can! I'll be waiting! ~Sueric

 

Eh, Hiroshi is harmless. I swear. I've got a leash on him. It's InuYasha I'm worried about…