InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Pain of Loss ❯ Bargaining ( Chapter 4 )

A loud roar echoed through the sky, and moments later, it was accompanied by a flash of bright white light ripping through the sky. The grey, overcast sky did not lift the group's spirits as the trudged along the dirt road, not a tree or shelter in sight. Moments later, the inevitable heavy splashes of water fell from the sky and it steadily increased until it was pouring down on the group.

Before the rain had started, the group had remained silent, all inwardly begging the kami to allow a quick and unobstructed passage to the town that the rumors of the Shikon no kakera led them to. Now, it was a heavy downpour, and the hanyou of the group began to notice irritably that the humans had begun to lag behind.

"What's your problem?" He snapped gruffly, and muttered about `weak humans' under his breath.

"I'm very sorry, Inuyasha," Miroku said without humor. "But the road has become thick and muddy, and we're having some problems trudging through it."

A look behind him verified that as he watched Kagome (Shippo held protectively to her chest), Sango, and Miroku struggling their ways through the heavy road. Inuyasha rolled his eyes and slowed his pace for them uncharacteristically, which did not go by unnoticed by Kagome. A small smile of appreciation was his reward.

"Keh."

The group continued on at their slow pace in silence, the humans wondering when they could stop, but realizing that there was no where to bid them protection from the rain. Inuyasha stared directly at the ground beneath him as he walked, silently brooding.

`Stupid humans…I'll bet they want to stop. If I were by myself, I'd be at that damned village by now. But…if I were by myself, Kagome wouldn't be here, with me…er…to detect the shards.'

Kagome's sneeze interrupted his thoughts.

`Damn. Is she getting sick?'

She sniffled loudly.

`I'll bet she is. Damn weak humans.'

Kagome tensed for a second, and Inuyasha looked at her from the corner of his eye. She gave him a guilty sideways glance, but when she saw that he was watching, she blushed furiously and her eyes quickly darted to the ground beneath her.

`She's holding it in, but I can tell she needs to cough.'

"Oi. Wench." He said gruffly. She looked up, eyes wide, in response. "Are you okay?" He said, failing to cover the concern in his voice.

"I'm fine." She said, a slight cough slipping in between the two words. She sniffled again, and Inuyasha looked to the kitsune in her warm, welcoming, loving embrace. The young child was held up against her chest, fast asleep, two handfuls clutched at the top of her kimono. Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"Don't lie, Wench." He said exasperated, as he shrugged off his bright red, firerat haori. He gently draped it over her shoulders and she gave him a grateful smile. "I can't have you getting sick. Then who would find the shards?"

For a nanosecond, a hurt look flitted across her features. That was quickly replaced by an angry expression; finally, she sighed and looked down to the ground. Behind them, Miroku placed a hand over his eyes and groaned while Sango just shook her head and rolled her eyes. A silence once again filled the air between the four travelers and two sleeping demons.

They continued to walk in the pouring rain for another hour or so before they luckily came across an inn and, for the small payment of a room for the night and a warm meal, Miroku provided them relief from that horrible cloud of evil he had seen hovering above their home. For once, no one complained about his cons and tricks.

* * * *

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. With a muttered, "Keh," he had left the room that the group shared and was outside, sitting on the roof and looking at the full moon, a brilliant fluorescent white, partially covered with thin, frayed clouds. Beams of moonlight forced through the clouds and formed irregular patterns of light and dark on the ground.

Before he had met Kagome, Inuyasha never would have appreciated the beauty of the sight he had come upon when he left to sit on the roof. As it was, he felt his breath catch in his throat and stared at the bright, huge orb with awe. Had anyone needed him, he was merely a leap away, but for now, the inu-hanyou was by himself and let the quiet serenity of this scene settle over him like a fog.

Inside, Miroku was telling the girls and Shippo about a certain demon he had come across before he had joined with Inuyasha, Shippo, and Kagome; Kirara lay curled up in the corner of the room, in kitten form, sleeping peacefully. Kagome paid rapt attention to the young monk as he continued on about a demon that performed extraordinary feats in exchange for young girls' innocence.

"How do these young girls call the demon to them?" Kagome asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Oh," Miroku said, waving his kazaana-cursed hand dismissively. "They leave some small trinket or sacrifice. Usually they dress solely in pure white, headdress and all, to show the brightness of their purity. It can be found anywhere, but purity especially attracts it."

Miroku took a side glance to Kagome, and questioned her of her interest in that certain demon. He warned her that the encounters young girls had set up almost never ended well for them, and that these things could become quite troublesome. Kagome just waved it off, saying that it was mere boredom that had caused her to question.

"If it's purity that attracts it, then I guess you've never had a problem with it coming to you, Houshi-sama," Sango remarked sharply, still rubbing a hand over her recently caressed backside.

Miroku just held his head high, as though offended, and replied, "Sango-san, I resent that you believe me to be so impure."

"Well, I seem to remember, Houshi-sama, a certain purity barrier that gave you quite some trouble crossing at a certain Mt. Hakurei."

The monk's haughty reply dulled into the background as Kagome's mind raced furiously. A demon that could perform amazing feats…could it be…was it possible…?

The monk put out the fire from the center of the room and the group set up for sleep. Kagome snuggled into her sleeping bag with Shippo, but she felt far too restless to stay still. When she listened, she heard the heavy breathing of the other four in the room. She was sure they were asleep and gently, silently pulled herself from her bedding and stood. She gave a side-glance to the large yellow bag sitting brightly next to her sleeping bag, and before she knew it, she was pulling out a white sheet.

She didn't know why she brought that out. She had brought the cloth with her back from her last visit to use as a sheet over her sleeping bag on nights that were too warm for the heavy bedding and too cold for no bedding at all. She efficiently folded it up and tucked it into her obi, then stole away to a creek she had seen near to the inn.

Kagome had been absent from the room only for a moment before the monk opened his eyes and cast a glance to the sliding door, his lips thin and his face tight in a grim expression. `She hasn't moved on yet. She puts on a happy, cheerful face. She pretends like nothing ever happened. But she hasn't moved on.' The monk stood up, plucked his staff from the corner, careful not to wake the sleeping fire cat who had been tucked right beside it, and followed the young girl from the obliterated future out the door.

Inuyasha watched as Kagome quickly left the inn, followed only a moment later by the monk. `What's going on…' he thought. `He'd better not try anything on her.' His eyes widened with shock, and an instant later, he was off after the two.

* * * *

Kagome looked all around her to make sure that she truly was alone as she knelt by the small, sparkling stream. She had found a nice spring in a clearing that was surrounded by thick, dense forest on all sides. The clearing was completely free of trees and allowed the moon's beams to illuminate the area around her. She stared at the reflection of the moonlight on the surface of the water, her eyes wide and glassy, lost in her thought. How she missed them all so! It wasn't as bad as the first night. She wasn't beside herself with grief. She didn't feel lost in a swirling void of pain and angst and blackness. But part of her was missing. She began to feel empty. On the group's long journeys to find more Shikon no kakera, she found herself asking silent questions. If she were to lose a body part in the process, would she sacrifice it to have her family back? What would she sacrifice to have her family back? The thoughts reminded her of a phrase from a romance novel she had read some time ago.

Have you ever lost someone who meant more to you than your own soul?

Kagome hadn't lost someone. She'd lost over 6 billion someones. Three of whom she'd give up her own soul for. If she had the chance, would she give up her own soul to give her mother, her brother, and her grandfather a chance to live again? She knew she would. But she resolved that if she ever learned of the opportunity, she would wait until she had collected all of the Shikon no kakera and give the completed jewel to Inuyasha to sacrifice herself. It was, after all, her fault that the jewel was in shards.

But…but this new demon…it only took innocence, not lives or souls. Kagome was more than willing to give that up if it meant that she could have Souta, Jii-chan, and Mama back. She placed the sheet over her head as a headdress. She had no pure white kimonos, but her soft blue and green patterned dress would have to do. Gently pulling a ring from her finger, she placed it in front of her as the trinket.

As she knelt in a humble position, head bowed, she wondering what the monk had meant by `innocence.' Would the demon take her virginity? She shivered at the thought, but knew it was something she must sacrifice. But…was it virginity? Or was it a different sort of innocence? Would the demon take innocence and purity of the soul? Would she become like Kikyou, the undead miko, seeing the earth through emotionless eyes, body filled with nothing but hatred?

She shook the thought from her mind. It wouldn't matter.

* * * * *

"Monk, where the hell are you going? What is going on? Why did Kagome run out of the inn?" Inuyasha made himself apparent to Miroku just as she had been entering the line of trees. Miroku looked up to the inu-hanyou and sighed.

"I told Kagome about a certain demon who grants extraordinary desires in exchange for a young girl's innocence. I was just talking to the group, and she seemed really interested in it. I think…I think she might-."

Inuyasha cut off the monk. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! Why would you tell her that? You know she would give up anything to have her family back!" He gave the monk no time to reply as he leapt into the trees and followed Kagome's scent. Miroku ran after him, keeping up with him on the ground.

A moment later, he found Kagome in a clearing, her eyes wide and glassy. Miroku put a hand in front of Inuyasha to stop him from running to her. He put a finger to his lips to indicate for him to be silent, and slowly crept forward. Inuyasha just scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest, brooding. Miroku came up behind Kagome and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Kagome-sama." Kagome didn't jump in surprise when Miroku put his hand on her shoulder. Her head bowed slightly, and a tear dropped from her face. Her shoulders jerked a few times, and in an instant, she spun around into Miroku's chest and sobbing.

He held her to him and soothed her while Inuyasha watched. What was he feeling? It wasn't…jealousy, exactly. He bristled slightly at the thought of Miroku touching Kagome, and he didn't see why it had to be Miroku in place of him who went up to the girl and comforted her. He watched as she sobbed into the young monk and he held her to his chest. He'd already comforted the girl. As had Sango. Now it was Miroku's turn. He saw it then. Bit by bit, all of them were helping her through her mourning.

With one last look to the two people kneeling in front of the stream, he jumped into a nearby tree where he could still watch over them but still give them some semblance of privacy. Kagome sniveled and looked up to Miroku. "I'm sorry," she said, blushing. "I've gotten your robes wet."

"Think nothing of it, Kagome-sama," Miroku said comfortingly. "I know what it is. I know what it's like to know what the right thing to do is, and because I am a holy figure, I must always follow the way of virtue." Kagome just nodded solemnly and wiped a few unwanted tears away. "But you must remember, Kagome-sama, that you are different. I have never met anyone with such a kind and gentle heart as you." Kagome blushed once more.

"I just…I just want them back. More than anything else in the world, I want them to live again. I'm still willing to sacrifice myself for them. I still feel anguish whenever I think of them."

"And so you will for a long time. It's hard to feel loss. And you've felt loss like no one here ever has before. But it's loss all the same. And you will move on, because you are strong. You're one of the strongest people I know, Kagome-sama, miko powers aside."

"Thank you, Miroku." Kagome said, and reached over to give him another hug.

"Think nothing of it, Kagome-sama."

The two holy figures stood and began to leave the forest. When they passed his tree, Inuyasha leapt down to walk with them, and Kagome gave him a slight smile. Her eyes were still watery, but it was a smile nonetheless. Together, the three walked back to the inn.

The next morning, they headed off again, and no one mentioned the events of the previous night.