Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction ❯ If This Cat Could Talk... ❯ Stand Up ( Chapter 9 )

If This Cat Could Talk…

By: Ellipsis the Great

DISCLAIMER: Kingdom Hearts and everything affiliated with it belongs to SquareEnix and Disney. All I own is the plot…

Summary: Axel's therapist suggests that he get a cat to help him get over an accident involving his little brother's best friend. It doesn't take him long to realize that strange things are afoot, however…

Rated: T just in case. May change later on.

Spoilers: None that I know of…

Warnings: Definite yaoi on the horizon, a little angst (obviously), and I suppose I should point out that this is AU…

 

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CHAPTER TEN: Stand Up

 

I left Sora's room a few moments later, for once at a loss of anything to say to him (usually I could talk for hours…or until I was kicked out, whichever came first). I wandered the halls for a while, searching for Roxas on each floor.

I finally found him in the lobby, talking to Xemnas—a very strange intern with even stranger theories about the connection between the brain and the heart. Something about how every person has a `dark' side of their heart that stores all of their true memories and darker emotions, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, and so on and so forth. He had taken a `special interest' in Sora's case, as well as in a few other cases similar to his.

“…You see, it's my theory that accidents such as your cousin's somehow unlocks the darker side of their heart. I'm trying to find the correlation between that and his coma, but unfortunately there isn't much I can do to prove or even disprove my theory.” Xemnas was saying as Roxas regarded him thoughtfully. “I think he's been locked in the same place the darker memories were, which means that locking up that dark portion of his heart would probably wake him.”

“That makes sense, I think.” Roxas mused. His next question sounded almost nervous. “But…how do you think one would go about locking up the dark portion of a person's heart?”

Xemnas shrugged. “I haven't worked out all of the kinks, yet. But, you know, I heard of a little girl in another town who was in a coma like Sora. She was in a coma for months, instead of years like him, but then one day another girl who was her age appeared. She befriended the townsfolk, and visited the other little girl until one day, just like that, the original girl woke up, and the other girl disappeared.” He frowned. “The only thing is that there isn't a lot of information about this. It's mostly just a rumor started by someone in the town—the man who had caused the accident that put the first girl in a coma, as a matter of fact. No one else in the town seems to know about it. It's very, very strange.”

“Yeah. Strange.” Roxas said, looking a little pale.

“Hey, Roxas.” I cut in, blinking when Roxas looked at me like I was a floating log and he was a drowning man. “Xemnas.”

“Axel.” Xemnas gave me a thin smile.

“Sorry to interrupt, Xemnas.” I wasn't really, and Xemnas knew it, so I quickly diverted my gaze toward Roxas. “I just called Luxord; we're going to meet him at the café down the street, if you're ready to go.”

“Okay.” Roxas said, latching onto my arm and flashing a hesitant smile at Xemnas. “Nice to meet you, Xemnas.”

“You, too.” Xemnas' polite smile widened into a rather creepy one. “I hope you'll think about what we discussed.”

Roxas nodded wordlessly, pressing himself closer to me.

“Let's go, Roxas.” I said, extracting my arm from his grip and ruffling his hair. Then I left, with only a short nod at Xemnas and an amiable wave at Aerith, who waved back enthusiastically.

Roxas hurried along after me, reminding me more of a puppy than the kitten he usually was.

“Axel…I'm sorry if I said something wrong.” He said as he struggled to keep up with my pace. “I didn't mean it when I said I wasn't your friend.”

“It's fine.” I said, keeping my eyes facing forward.

“No, it's not.” He insisted. “You're angry or hurt or…or something, because you haven't really looked at me since that guy called us fags. And you keep running away. I really am sorry, you know. It's just…this is all happening really fast. I think maybe it was just too much at one time.”

“It's not your fault, Roxas. Just leave it alone.” I said.

“I won't leave it alone until you look at me.” He said, his voice growing angry. Then he sighed, leaning into me a little. “Look, Axel, I know I'm really stupid about some things, like how human relationships work and all of the…nuances of your language, but I'm trying as hard as I can. I'm not saying that that's any sort of excuse for being mean, but it seems like a good reason for you to be patient with me. Please try to be patient, and I'll try even harder so I don't have to burden you too much. I promise I'll try not to hurt you again.”

“Roxas, it's seriously not a big deal.” I said. “I just read too far into it and let it get to me, alright? It's not your fault that you don't understand everything—it's my fault for being stupid about the whole thing. I'll…try to be more patient from now on.”

I could actually feel the smile that spread across his face, even before he leaned over so as to look up at me.

“And you'll look at me again?” He asked.

I couldn't stop the laugh that bubbled up in my chest from bursting out of my mouth. It was now quite easy to see that he was a kitten, the little attention hog (cat?).

“Yeah, Roxie, I'll look at you again.”

His smile widened. “Good.” He said, pulling my arm around his shoulders and snuggling close to me with an impish grin. “We know I'm not homosexual, right? So this is okay.”

“Right.” I said, laughing again.

“I think this is what most folks call a `Kodak moment.'”

We looked over at the speaker, a bleach blond man with amused crystal blue eyes.

“It's all blackmail to you, Lux.” I said with a smirk as I once again pulled away from Roxas, though this time it was just to give my best friend a manly hug. You know the one, where wrists are clasped and backs are slapped…yeah.

“That's true.” Luxord admitted. “And who's this?”

“Lux, this is Sora's cousin, Roxas Astera. Roxie, this is my best friend Luxord Veinardurée.”

“Aww, your best friend?” Luxord teased. “You're gonna make me blush, Carrot-top.”

“Shut up, Blondie.” I said, shoving him gently.

“Anyhow, nice to meet you, Roxas.” Luxord said, offering Roxas a hand. “Any family of Sora's is family of mine.”

Roxas shook the hand politely. “You, too. And Axel said the same thing…about Sora's family, I mean.” He said.

“Ah, hell, Sora's got more family in Twilight Town than most folks do in all of the other worlds combined.” Luxord said. “Not literally, of course, but we all love him.”

“Even though he's asleep?” Roxas asked curiously.

“Especially because of that. But let's not get into that depressing stuff, eh?” Luxord waved the subject off with a hand. “You guys hungry?”

“You paying?” I asked, arching an eyebrow at him.

Luxord smirked. “Xigbar owes me a few.”

I rolled my eyes. “So does half of the town.” I said, then turned to Roxas to explain. “Luxord here is the best gambler in Twilight Town—everyone's lost against him at least once.”

Roxas mouth formed a cute `o' as he nodded. “Who's Xigbar?”

“He works with me, and we hang out sometimes. You'll get to meet him in a second.” I said, looking back at Luxord. “We going inside, then?”

“Yeah, sure.” I said, beginning to head inside, but he stopped me by putting a hand on my chest.

“Just as a warning…the whole gang is here.” He said. “And I do mean the whole gang.”

What he meant was: `Riku and Kairi are here.' And although Kairi no longer liked my brother, she would still team up with him when it came to beating up on me.

I sighed, but nodded. It was going to be a long night. “That's fine.”

“Oh, and Dem-Dem brought some friends with him.” He added as we entered the café, Roxas following close behind me.

“Kairi's the girl from the hospital?” Roxas asked quietly.

“Yeah.” I replied vaguely, my body already tense with anxious nerves.

“Hey, Axel!” Demyx exclaimed, waving excitedly from the booth where he, Riku, Naminé, and Lexaeus sat. In the booth in front of them sat Xigbar Baines (a weird guy who worked with me at Cid's), Cloud Strife (Sora's half-brother), and Squall Leonhart (Cloud's boyfriend, who insisted on being called Leon). The booth behind Demyx's held Kairi and her friends Selphie, Lulu, and Wakka.

“Hi, Dem.” I said with an uneasy smile.

“Who's the kid?” Xigbar asked, looking behind me at Roxas.

“Another victim of the Scáth family.” Kairi spoke up darkly, already glaring at me.

I flinched.

“My name is Roxas Astera.” Roxas said, narrowing his eyes at her as he stepped out from behind me and crossed his arms over his chest. “And I'm not anyone's victim. I'm Sora's cousin.”

“You serious, mon?” Wakka asked, obviously trying to curtail the impending argument. Wakka was a pretty nice guy, though he was sadly enamored with Lulu. Not that Lulu was a bad person, she was just hung up on Wakka's brother, Chappu, who had passed away a few years earlier while trying to break up a street fight.

“I've never met you before.” Cloud said warily.

“Well I should think not.” Roxas said, giving the older blonde a strange look. “I've never been here before.”

Xigbar let out an amused snicker. “That's Cloud Strife, kiddo—Sora's half-brother.”

“Oh.” Roxas blushed. “Sorry, Mr. Strife. I'm a foster kid, so I've moved around a lot and I've never met anyone from my genetic family before.”

Cloud frowned, but nodded his head just slightly.

“He definitely looks like an Arsalan.” Selphie giggled. “He's got the blue eyes and the crazy hair for it, doesn't he?”

“And he's already wormed his way in with the Scáth family.” Kairi muttered.

Roxas pursed his lips together, his fierce glare from before returning. “Look, Kairi,” He spat the name out with a surprising amount of venom. “Do you have a problem with me? Because to be quite honest, I don't see what I've done to deserve your attitude.”

“You've shacked up with Axel.” She replied with just as much anger in her voice, if not more. “That's enough for me.”

“He did not `shack up' with me!” I finally jumped in. “He just stayed the night. There's no reason for him to go to a hotel when he can stay with us.”

“Close enough.” She hissed. “If he's stupid enough to hang out with you and your brother—”

“I am not stupid just because I hang out with Axel!” Roxas said. “And if that's the only reason you have for not liking me, then I'm rather glad I'm not hanging out with you! At least Axel is trying to be nice to me, and if I decided I wanted to hang out with you, too, then he wouldn't have a problem with it. But so far you have been the most rude, overbearing person I've ever met—as if it's any of your business who I do or don't hang out with!”

She made a disgusted noise. “God, he's already got you wrapped around his finger, doesn't he?”

“It's physically impossible to be wrapped around someone's finger, so no.” He snapped.

“Ugh, jeez! I'm surrounded by homo's!” She said, throwing her hands up.

“I am not gay!”

“You really think I didn't see you snuggling up to him earlier today?” She asked acidly. “You're as much of a fag as Riku! You had better stay away from Sora, or—”

“Or what?” He demanded, hands balling into fists at his sides. “Listen here, you dog of a woman: I am not gay. I hang out with gay people, yes, but that does not make me gay. Even if I was gay it would be none of your business. If I wanted to go screw Axel sideways in the bathroom it would be none of your business. And you have no right to keep me away from my cousin, regardless of my sexual orientation, so don't bother trying.”

“I'll do everything I can to keep him away from people like you and that monster!” She threw me a pointed glare.

“People like me? What would YOU know about what sort of people I'm like?” He demanded. “You haven't talked to me except to insult me and Axel—you don't know anything about me except my name and the fact that I'm Sora's cousin! And if you really think Axel's a monster than I'll wager you don't know much about him, either!” His reddening face was getting darker and darker as he spoke, his hands balled into such tight fists at his sides that his knuckles had gone white. “Axel's one of the nicest, sweetest people I've ever met, and if you insult him again I'll show you just how much of a monster someone can be when pushed!”

“Roxas?” Naminé spoke up, standing.

“What?” He snarled. His entire face had twisted into an animalistic expression unlike any I had seen even when he was in his cat form. Even Leon looked a little alarmed. But as soon as he had asked the question that contorted his face, he gasped. His face lost all of its color, then the color returned full force as he dipped into a deep bow. “I-I'm sorry. I got carried away. I didn't mean to snap like that, and…and I'm really sorry, miss!”

Naminé smiled softly. “It's alright.” She stepped out of the booth, offering a hand to him. “Will you take a walk with me, please? I'd like to talk to you, if you don't mind.”

He glanced at me, and I shrugged. He nodded hesitantly. “O-okay, miss.”

“My name is Naminé.” She said. “Naminé Martell—I'm Kairi's younger sister.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him along after her, looping an arm around his when he got close enough for her to do so. “Come on, then.”

Roxas shot me a slightly frightened look, but I just shrugged again as she pulled him out of the café.

“Is that kid stable?” Riku asked.

“Why, because he got angry when Kairi started badmouthing us?” I asked with a frown. “Not all of the people who like me are unstable, as hard as I'm sure that is for you to believe.”

“What's your problem?” Kairi asked.

“Oh, I don't know, Kairi, what is my problem?” I asked. “Could it maybe be that for the first time in ten fucking years there's a member of Sora's family who actually listened to my side of the story instead of immediately taking up with you and Riku and everyone else in this town who is bound and determined to make sure I'm miserable for the rest of my life? And maybe he's the only person who isn't paid or obligated to tell me that he doesn't think it was my fault, and he does say it, and he's being completely genuine about it? And maybe, just maybe, for some weird reason, I don't want YOU running off the only good thing that's happened to me ever since I made the worst mistake of my life!”

“You're saying you deserve to be happy? You, Axel?” Riku scoffed.

“What more do I have to do or say to deserve happiness, Riku?” I asked, my voice cracking. “I've done everything. I tried to die for it and you stopped me, I've tried not smiling or being happy, I've tried to make sure I can never go near a car again…what more do you want from me? I was a kid, Riku. It was a stupid, stupid mistake, and I'll never be able to atone for that, I know. But I wasn't the one who put Sora in the bed. Maybe I set the events into motion, but I wasn't the one who got drunk and ran into the car.”

“Don't try to place the blame on someone else!” Kairi hissed. “You went driving before you were old enough just so that you could try to turn Sora into some sort of fag—”

“I was one week away from getting my license!” I said. “You and everyone else here knows I was one of the best drivers you knew! All I was trying to do was calm Sora down because he and Riku had an argument. I wasn't going to try and force him to like Riku back. I thought he already did like Riku; and hell, I'm probably just biased because Riku's my baby brother and I wanted him to be happy with the person he's been in love with since he was too young to know what love is!”

“Wait, what?” Riku asked, staring at both of us.

“Didn't Kairi ever tell you all of that? Or did she just tell you I was trying to turn him into a fag, and that's why I took him driving? And you couldn't even come and ask me about it, could you? Couldn't come and ask big bad homicidal Axel his side of the story, huh? I don't deserve any chances to explain what happened, do I?” I asked angrily.

“Don't try to delude him, Axel!” Kairi said. “We aren't going to have a pity party for you—no matter what your sick reasons were you still practically killed Sora! And you can never redeem yourself; you will never deserve to be happy! You deserve to die! Riku never should have stopped you from killing yourself!”

“Oh, does this make you happy?” I demanded, yanking my shirt sleeves back and shoving my scarred arms in her face. “Do I have enough scars for you, Kairi? Do I need more?”

“Axel, stop that!” Luxord said, grabbing my arms and pulling me away from Kairi, who looked scared of me for the first time.

“No!” I jerked away from him, grabbing a knife off of the table and holding it over one of my wrists. “Tell me, Kairi! How many more scars do I need before you'll be satisfied?”

“Axel, no!” Roxas yelled as he reentered the café, practically tackling the arm that held the knife and wrestling it out of my hand. “No more scars! You promised!”

“Well we have to conform to whatever Princess Kairi wants, don't we?” I asked, still glaring at her above his head. “We all have to fit into her happy little anti-Axel world, right?”

“No! You promised me, Axel!” He said, beating a fist against my chest. “You help me and I'll help you, remember? You promised!”

“What do promises matter when they don't cater to all of Kairi's whims? I don't deserve to be happy, Roxas, I deserve to die! I should've already died according to her, so I might as well—”

“Shut up!” He screamed. “Shut up shut up shut up! You aren't allowed to hurt yourself because you promised me and you don't break promises, Axel!” Then he turned on Kairi, slapping her so hard that her face jerked to one side and she stumbled back. “You stay away from Axel, Kairi Martell! You are not going to make him break his promise to me!”

He grabbed hold of my hand and ran out of the café with me half-stumbling to keep up with him, not stopping until we were a few blocks away in a small park.

He turned on me, tears misting up his deep blue eyes as he threw himself into my chest.

“You're so stupid…” He sobbed, hitting me again. “You're so stupid, Axel. You promised me you wouldn't hurt yourself again, and you…you…”

“I…” All that had just happened was finally catching up with my brain, and I could feel the blood draining out of my face. “That's the first time I've ever…oh, God, I'm such an idiot…”

“Yeah, you are!” He said, pulling away so I could see his red-rimmed eyes. “You just told me you weren't going to hurt yourself again last night, and you were gonna cut yourself!”

“I…I stood up to Kairi and Riku.” I said. “I've never…I…oh, God…”

“You usually let them say that stuff to you?” He asked. “Your own brother makes you want to hurt yourself?”

“I deserve it, Roxas. I put out the sun…I…”

“No! You're wrong; you didn't put out the sun! That drunk guy did! It's not your fault, and no one should make you feel like it was! Especially not your brother!”

“Riku is the most justified of anyone…”

“No, he's not.” He said. “It hurts you the most when he says those things, doesn't it? He's your brother, Axel. You should be helping each other with this, not hurting each other. You're not supposed to hurt your family. Not like that.”

“But Roxas—”

He shook his head. “Just shut up, Axel. And swear on Sora's head that you'll never, ever hurt yourself again. Swear that you won't let them talk to you like that again, too. Please, Axel.” I could feel his eyes squeeze shut as he whimpered softly into my shirt. “Please? Promise.”

“Okay. I promise.” I whispered. “I…I swear on Sora's head.”

He relaxed against me with a relieved sigh. Then one of his hands grabbed a fistful of my shirt as he stuck his other thumb in his mouth.

“Roxas…” I scolded gently.

“Don't care.” He mumbled around his thumb. “You scared me, you stupid human.”

“I'm sorry.”

“'S okay.” He said, and looked up at me. “Can you…would you hold me?”

I smiled and wrapped my arms around him.

He melted into me. “Thanks.”

 

~*~ENDCHAPTERTEN~*~