Mai-HiME Fan Fiction ❯ Mai-HiME: "Loose Threads" ❯ Chapter 9

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Mai HiME: "Loose Threads"

Chapter 9

Penance. The word felt right in some way. To Tokiha Mai, it meant a chance to make things right. To mend the hurts of her actions by seeking forgiveness from the ones she had wronged.

The day was warm and bright sunlight shone through the many trees lining the Fuuka Gakuen courtyards. Classes were over for the day and many of the students not in after school clubs had either gone home or left campus. The sense of solitude put Mai at ease. It was far simpler to wander the empty pathways lost in thought than to confront what was to come.

It had seemed so simple when she'd left the chapel. Mai's first step on the path toward redemption would be difficult but not nearly so as her planned conversation with one feral girl. Compared to her, the heartache and pain of this day would be a breeze.

"Those who love the truth will find the path in time," Nao had told her. The truth was her only way out, her only light in the darkness. Yet, what happens when you, yourself don't know what that truth is?

Somehow, Mai felt, the truth of her feelings and the truth of her present life didn't match up. For her sanity's sake she had to take this first step.

Her physical steps ended outside the Fuuka Gakuen sports buildings. Within the complex stood an old-fashioned style dojo where the high school kendo club held practice. The sounds of stomping, tabi-clad feet, sharp breaths and the crack of clashing bamboo wafted outside.

After taking a large breath, Mai shed her shoes, stepped forward and knocked. The door slid open to reveal the unfamiliar face of a first-year member.

"Please forgive the intrusion of your practice," Mai said formally. "I'm Tokiha Mai, Second Year High School section. I need to speak with your Captain, Tate Yuuichi."

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The meeting took place in Natsuki's dorm room. Harada Chie and her companion Senou Aoi sat together on cushions, while across the table, their host Kuga Natsuki sat with her lady love, Fujino Shizuru. Both looked rather frazzled as the former president's speech to the Tea Ceremony Club had ended in pandemonium. A planning mistake had the Shizuru fan club (which still held weekly meetings) sitting next to the fledgling Kikukawa Yukino fan club.

Natsuki, who usually eschewed such meetings made a note to attend more often if they were always this exciting. She stole a glance at Shizuru whose ruby eyes studied the screen of a cell phone.

"Your thoughts Senou-san," she said after some reflection.

Aoi suddenly recalled being called to the blackboard in math class when she had no idea what the correct answer was.

"Um...from what I saw, it looks like Nao and Mikoto-chan are an item," she replied carefully.

"I asked what your thoughts on the matter are," Shizuru said rather sternly.

"Shizuru," Natsuki breathed. Her love's eyes had gone hard as steel with no provocation. Just what was she getting at?

"I...um..." Aoi was at a loss for words. The former president, so genteel and graceful was staring at her now, staring *through* her. Aoi was shaken by her very presence which seemed to fill this small room.

Chie felt compelled to put a protective arm around the girl.

"At first," Aoi began. "I thought it was great that two cute girls like them were together. But when I look at these," she indicated the cell phone. "The relationship seems so...joyless."

"I thought as much," Shizuru agreed handing the phone back. "Forgive me for being so harsh, but you're a good judge of character and I needed a second opinion."

"It doesn't make much sense," Chie interjected. "Nao's always been man-hungry, so why hook up with another girl? Especially Mikoto."

"It's more like she treats them like paper dolls," Natsuki intoned.

"It's another mystery to add to the list," Chie said. "But it may be connected to our main mystery; what happened to Mai."

The others leaned forward, listening raptly.

"Two weeks ago Mai and Mikoto were barely seen together. I originally thought they'd had a fight over something trivial but now with Aoi's find it can't be just coincidence that Mikoto has taken up with Nao of all people."

"Could it be that...?" Shizuru's summation was cut off by the ringing of a cell phone.

Chie answered and listened for a few seconds, her eyes widened. "Yeah, thanks again." "An acquaintance saw Mai headed toward the Sports Complex a few minutes ago."

"She doesn't belong to any sports clubs," Aoi recalled. "Oh no! Could she be trying to...?"

The front door slammed open and Natsuki was already on her way.

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The office was cramped. Though, cramped was generous. The small room just off the kendo club practice floor was crammed full of papers and training manuals, its walls literally covered with framed photos of the club at various tournaments and exhibitions.

Tokiha Mai sat upon a cushion sipping tea while across the low

table, the young captain, Tate Yuuichi sat avoiding her eyes. Kendo club captain in only your second year and you can't even face your own girlfriend he berated himself.

But something was hurting Mai, something he, Yuuichi couldn't touch. Somehow he knew that her current condition was his fault. As the man who'd sworn to protect her he was ashamed.

"Mai..." he began. Tate winced as the normally, vivacious Mai seemed to withdraw even more from him. "I-I'm sorry Mai. It was too soon for you. But I just kept pushing..."

"Tate..."

"I couldn't just let it go..."

"Tate...no..."

"Why am I such a jerk?! I don't deserve to be loved by you!"

"YOU'RE WRONG!" Mai exclaimed. Yuuichi was startled to silence. "I'm the one who doesn't deserve to be loved. I'm disgusting."

Yuuichi was stunned to see Mai's facade crumble. Tears ran freely down her cheeks.

"I did something terrible to Mikoto," Mai continued, her voice trembling now. "I tried to fix it by letting her see the two of us together. I thought she'd understand what happened was a mistake and she'd accept it.

"But the next time I saw you, when I came to your room, all I could think about was how I'd used you. No matter how I looked at it, I was just using you again. But this time, instead of convincing Mikoto of our relationship, I was trying to convince myself."

After all of the HiME business and being practically dead for a while Tate Yuuichi thought there was little else Tokiha Mai could do to surprise him. However, this came as quite a shock. He'd spent days punishing himself mentally and physically for imagined crimes against the woman he loved. Yet, now she was taking the blame for what happened.

Tate rounded the table and took Mai by the shoulders. "Why do you always have to take everything on yourself?" he tried to see her eyes but Mai refused to meet his gaze. While he was surprised and hurt by Mai's confession, there was something else, something she was holding back.

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER!"

Both pairs of eyes snapped toward the office entrance where an irate Kuga Natsuki stood. Her green eyes blazed as she stood in a combat stance. A first-year team member lay at her feet.

"S-sempai, we...tried...to stop her," he croaked."

Yuuichi sighed raggedly and released Mai's shoulders. "Take everybody on a few laps around the track," he said.

When the student managed to drag himself away Tate offered the brunette girl a seat.

Natsuki didn't sit but she did take a protective position next to Mai. "Explain yourself," she addressed Yuuichi. "And maybe I'll settle for just breaking your arms before we call the cops."

"Not his fault..." Mai said softly.

"What?"

"It's not his fault," Mai's voice came, stronger this time.

"Don't take up for him!" Natsuki objected.

"It's the truth!" Mai cried, her tears starting anew. "That night, when you saw me like that, I tried to give myself to Yuuichi."

"Mai..." Natsuki's eyes widened in disbelief.

"But I couldn't go through with it so I ran away," Mai continued. "But that's not the worst of it." She was looking at Yuuichi now whose expression had become unreadable.

"I didn't run just because I was embarrassed or ashamed, Tate. I ran because I wanted to be with someone that night, and it wasn't you."