Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ Itachi's Plans From A to Z ❯ Plan B- Get an HIV test and then take Naruto ( Chapter 2 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me, but the HIV test results are mine.




Itachi: * Dreaming about naked boys on a very dirty T.V show*

Kisame: * Wakes up and sees his blood on the floor* 0______0 * Looks in mirror * I... look... pale... blue...

Itachi: * Wakes up and sees LOTS of blood on the floor* O____________________________O * Looks at mirror* I... look... like...a...ghost...

Kisame: NOW THE FANGIRLS WILL NEVER LIKE ME FOR SURE!!!!! *Cries *

Itachi: NOW THE FANGIRLS WILL LOVE SASUKE MORE THAN ME!!!!!! * Cries hysterically*

Kisame: At least we'll always be together... * Hugs Itachi*

Itachi: O_o

Kisame: Jeez... jerk...

Itachi: There is a way we could return to our normal selves.

Kisame: !_! Really? How?

Itachi: The blood is still wet!!! Rip the carpet apart and lets squeeze the remaining blood into a bucket! ^_^

Kisame: You're desperate aren't you?

Itachi: IT'S FOR THE SAKE OF MY FANGIRLS!!! BE UNDERSTANDING WILL YOU?!

Kisame: Umm... okay... O_o

Itachi: * Rips carpet apart and grabs a random bucket*

Kisame: * Squeezing blood into bucket*

Itachi: WE DID IT!!!! NOW, I SHALL DRINK ALL THIS BLOOD!!!!

Kisame: What about me?

Itachi: There is only enough for one of us. I am more worthy so I should drink it.

Kisame: Just drinking the blood won't help. I donated blood to someone before.

Itachi: Hopefully, they didn't turn into a shark. ^_^

Kisame: -____- As I was saying, drinking blood won't help (unlesss you think you are a vampire), because the only way is to use some sort of tool.

Itachi: Like what?

Kisame: I don't know.

Itachi: Then what you just said back there was meaningless.

Kisame: Yep.

Itachi: Whatever. * Preparing to drink blood*

Kisame: WAIT!!! WHAT IF ONE OF US HAS HIV?!

Itachi: I don't have HIV, do I look sick to you?

Kisame: When someone has HIV, they don't experience symptons for years! Not to mention, they look like their normal selves.

Itachi: So you're saying I should go through the whole painful process of having an HIV test. -_-

Kisame: Yeah, and so will I.

Itachi: What about Naruto?

Kisame: Yeah, he'll get an HIV test, too.

Itachi: He's too young.

Kisame: Anyone- especially kids- can get HIV.

Itachi: That's scary... so my brother might have it, too.

Kisame: Since when did you care about your brother?

Itachi: Uh... never mind... now help me carry this idiot to the hospital... we'll get my HIV test and determine whether I could drink the blood or not...

Kisame: Okay.

Itachi: * Tries carrying Naruto*

Kisame: He's... too... heavy...

Naruto: *Wakes up again and sees the horrifying T.V program and faints again* X___X

Itachi: Is it that bad? I'm over the shock already.

Kisame: You should have heard about the Itachi and Kisame special.

Itachi: 0_0 Let's not talk about this anymore.

Kisame: You're right.

*Door opens*

Sasuke: What they hell are you two doing?

Itachi: Umm... hi... do you mind helping us carry this morn to the hospital? We are all going to get an HIV test.

Sasuke: I guess that explains the bucket of blood on the floor.

Itachi: Why must you always know this stuff?

Sasuke: Ask the author that.

Miko: Yeah, what he said.

Itachi: ?_?

Kisame: This is the weirdest day of my life.

Miko: Sasuke, get out, you're ruining the fun.

Sasuke: You're the one ruining everything because no one knows you.

Miko: Say... that... again...

Sasuke: You're the one ruining everything because no one knows you.

Miko: *Kicks Sasuke out the window to the lady's locker room in a random YMCA*

Women: 0_0

Sasuke: Uh... oh...

Women: WE LOVE YOU SASUKE!!! COME GIVE US A HUG!!!! *Pounce*

Sasuke: *Girly scream*

Miko: Well, that's the end of Sasuke. ^_^ Oh, and I have your HIV tests. You should look at them.

Itachi and Kisame: *Looking at HIV tests* WHAT THE-