Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ What do you see in me ❯ Is death worth the sin ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Summary: Even when she hated him most she couldn't stay away from him
(This is my first fan fiction so please go easy on me)
Disclaimer: sadly I don't own Naruto
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What Do You See In Me
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Chapter4: Is death worth the sin
Hinata eluded herself from the Akatsukis, knowing that she wasn't ever going to be fully accepted by them or Konoha. She secluded herself from even speaking to them. Every once in a while she would ask to leave the hideaway just to drown herself even further in the sea of misery that was flaking around her. She knew that if she was on a more sociable level with them, they wouldn't torture her as much as they were now. Before she found out that they were keeping her here for eternity for not being able to lour the Kybi, she could conversant with them without feeling detached.
That feeling no longer resided within her heart.
To be exact, all feeling that she once had left her, leaving her numb and forlorn.
Being away from Konhagakure for months could do that to a person.
Hinata was bunched up against the small furnace in solitude, trying to knock off the bit of frost that invaded her room. She shrugged her shoulders, burying her face in the suave material of the electric blanket. Tomorrow would mark her third month of being cooped up in this room without coming out. Another day of hell to suffer alone. She refused to let them defuse her hope of someday being welcomed in Konoha. She knew just as well as they did that she was just thinking on the spur of the moment and not really taking it into consideration.
Konoha would never accept a traitor among their mists.
She would likely be another Sasuke Uchiha.
Or Itachi Uchiha.
Something in Hinata melted at the mere thought of the eldest and only other Uchiha she knew of. He hadn't spoken to her since he told her she could leave. It probably was for the best if she kept her distance from him. Scooting as close as possible to the heater, she closed her eyes.
If she made that wish one more time then maybe it would come true.
The wish that at least once before she died, Itachi would burst through her poorly latched door and profess his undying affection for her.
But that was wishful thinking also.
The hinges of her ashen door creaked as it was slowly being pushed open, startling her. Hinatas head snapped around to see Deidaras lone eye watching her like a hawk. His cerulean eye made a hastened sweep over the room before returning back to her shaken form. “Konan says dinners ready, bitch. I suggest you come and eat if you're hungry.” His tempering tone didn't surprise her in the least bit. Everyone knew that he would annoy her to no end even when she was wallowing in her own despair,
But his tone held a little bit of concern but the anger concealed most of it.
“No thank you. Tell Konan that I'm not really hungry.” Her voice husky as she directed her attention back to the snow that blanketed the outside world. He muttered something incoherent, slamming the door shut with a bit more force shut than necessary. The small decorative pictures that hung from the walls rattling from the impact.
She winced as one of the pictures fell, the glass shattering into millions of tiny pieces. Looking back, she watched as the pieces flew around, bouncing off the squeaking floorboards and into the pile of clothes that she refused to pick up. If only life were as easy as glass. Glass didn't have to worry of others affections of wants. All glass had to worry about was staying clean and someone caring enough to keep it from harms way.
With people, there was so much more than just caring.
Her pearl gaze left the shattered glass for a moment to peer up at her unlatched door. She almost didn't hear him enter, he was so reposed.
The sight of him appeased her.
Her voice exacerbated as she began to speak. “Why are you in here?! I told Deidara I wasn't hungry.” Itachi disregarded her negative attitude, descending himself onto her futon. She felt stupid, watching from the floor as her strode into her room and sat on her pitiful excuse of a bed. Her cheeks colored in embarrassing, the idea of staying warm vanishing from her mind. “Get off my bed!” She stood, the hulking blanket falling from her shoulders. His dark eyes gazed up to her in a lazy manner as she towered over him. “Didn't you hear me?!” She forgot that she only had on a very revealing night gown. “Hn.” Itachi grumbled, his hands pillowing his head.
Hinatas face flustered, slapping his knee. “Get up Itachi and get the hell out of my room!” “Konan used to stay in this room, that is, when Pein found her.” His voice hushed, his eyes fell to the broken picture frame. “Y-y-you knew didn't you?” “Leaders name?” He rose, sliding the picture from the glass pieces. She didn't notice it until he had the picture in his hands.
The picture was of Konan and Pein, when they were younger.
“She was an orphan. That's how Pein was physically drawn to her. He was an orphan also.” He took great care in dusting the colored picture off, his gaze lingering along the edge of the photo. Hinata felt a question burning the tip of her tongue. She couldn't ever ask him though or she would have to own up to the feelings that she pushed back. “He never wanted to keep you alive. I had to coax him to let you live in order to obtain the nine-tailed fox,” He finally looked up to her, his eyes cautious not to show emotion. “I made a mistake by letting you live.”
Those words were like a low blow to her gut.
She felt her knees give way. “A m-mistake? Why did you fight for my life if you knew that your plan was going to fail?” She mentally told herself to stay strong. She couldn't show him how vulnerable she was to his words. “It would seem that Kyubi had strong affections for you.” His eyes narrowed on her, anticipating her answer. She chose her words carefully. “You had your information mixed up. Naruto- kun never had any sort of feelings for me besides the admiring attraction to my jutsu.” He wanted to laugh. To think, he actually thought that he would have to fight for her attention.
Uzumaki Naruto didn't care for her.
She would soon learn to lose her affection for him also.
“Hinata, go back by the furnace.” It was more of a demand than a matter of whether she wanted to or not. So she complied to his demand without protest, bundling up under the large blanket once more (!? I can't help it but I like the saying “once more”!?)
“Itachi, does any of the other Akatsukis know Leaders name?” Her breath came out in slow puff, her mauve eyes glancing out the small window. “No,” She waited for him to finish, when he didn't she was forced to look up at him. Her cheeks flushed at the sight of Itachi kneeled before her.
How had he moved so quickly?
She hadn't even heard him get up.
“I-Itachi—“Hush,” He held his finger to her lips, silencing her. “Why did you come back?”
He waited three months to finally ask her?
Hinata pushed aside his hand, freeing her lips from his touch. If only he would kiss her instead of taunting her with his fingers. “You're just asking me this?” She couldn't hold back her bottling anger much longer. Turning her back to him, she felt those obnoxious black eyes of his on her. “I thought you were upset with me for telling you to leave.” “Why did you tell me to leave in the first place?!” She was force to look at him again, awaiting the pun that would most likely greet her.
Surprisingly, there wasn't any.
“I told you to leave because Pein was going to order the Akatsukis to kill you.” Hinata felt her whole being melt to the floor, seeping between the cracks of the wooden boards. “He wants to kill me?” The word `kill' burning her tongue. “But what about becoming an Akatsuki?” “It was all a decoy. An act to attract the Kyubi but it seems that he doesn't attract well to ugly Hyuga heirs.”
The pun that she dreaded.
Even if it was just a pun to upset her, it still ripped her heart out to know that Naruto didn't feel the unchanging physical attraction she felt for him. Itachis gaze left her crumbling face for an instant, feeling as if he destroyed something within her that before was spreading its wings to take flight. Her pale eyes were lifeless as she diverted her gaze back to the window. “Itachi, if—if Leader orders you all to kill me, I want you to kill me.” Her voice a whisper, her shivering form catching his attention “You want me to kill you?” He reached over her to turn the dial on the furnace up, his cloaked arm brushing over her covered shoulder.
“If not, I'll gladly ask Deidara to do it since he clearly hates me.” “Didn't I tell you that Deidara has a soft spot for you?” He bypassed her fierce gaze as he huddled under the bulky blanket with her, loosing his cloak.
Invading her personal space.
“I thought you were misspoken.” She scooted over closer to the furnace, the neon light blazing her pale cheeks. “Not misspoken, I was being very forward with you.” He didn't try scooting near her, his dark eyes set on the white blanket overtaking their small hideaway. “I could tell. No wonder ladies are so forward with you.” She muttered, eyeing her from the corner of her eyes. “Why thank you. I didn't know you were so interested in my women affairs.” Itachi rubbed is chin, eyeing her from the corner of his eyes. “I'm not!” Hinata quickly answered her cheeks flushed. She let out a deep sigh, rubbing her hands together beneath the bulky quit. “If you really wish to end your life, why don't you end it yourself? Pein certainly wouldn't mind if we lessened the amount of people living under him already.” His fingers brushed over her naked knees, making goose bumps form.
“Committing suicide wouldn't be the way I want to die.” She drew her knees to her chest, trying to stop any further touching of flesh between them. “How would you like to die?” He became enticed with the way she spoke, wanting desperately to hear how she would like to be killed.
He wanted to be the one to kill her no matter what he told her earlier.
She paused briefly, shifting under his scrutiny. “I don't know; I'd like to die by the person that had strong emotions for me and could no longer stand the sight of me. Someone that loved me so much that they would feel remorse once the deed is done but would be able to move on.” She shuddered as a breeze caught her by surprise. Itachi insides froze over, suddenly remembering who he was.
He could be the one to cause all this anguish and hatred for her.
Make her hate him again instead of considering him.
A light weight against his shoulder caught him off guard. Glancing down, he was a bit shocked to see Hinata Hyugas head abutting his shoulder. It almost felt good, as if they belonged that way.
“Sorry but the cold has got me a bit drowsy and I can't even hold my head up.” “It's not the cold; you've gotten sick on me.” His hand grasped her thigh, tugging her against his warmth. “I'm not sick Itachi!” She protested, her head lifting slightly so she could have a better view of him. “I could beg to differ. Your nose has been running for the pass two minutes.” She raised abruptly, heat rising in her cheeks. Rushing to the hanging mirror, Hinata felt her face go hot. “Why didn't you tell me?!” “I found it adorable.” He chuckled, covering up the emptiness he felt now that she wasn't sitting next to him. “You found it adorable! You're such a bastard!” She snatched a tissue up from the night stands' drawer, blatantly blowing her nose into it boisterously.
“That's very rude, my sunflower.” Her actions prevented, hearing what he called her.
He was calling her his sunflower once again.
Did that mean they were on speaking terms again?
She finished blowing her nose, acting as if she hadn't heard what he called her. “Why the hell are you still in here for?” “I'm bored and I thought `who's the second most boring person here besides Zetsu' and I thought `Hinata'.” She snorted, retrieving what was left of the blanket. “If I'm so boring, why don't you go find some new members so they can occupy you?” “That's exactly what Leader intended me to do but I thought that was a ridiculous plan.” He sounded truly inquisitive to what she was saying. “It was just a thought; you don't have to take me seriously since I am a threat to the Akatsukis.” She pushed his arm away, taking the space where it once occupied.
“A threat? Not one of us find you as any threat since you don't even plead yourself loyal enough to go back to Konoha.” Hinata was silent, no longer liking their conversation. “I don't find myself wanting to go back to Konoha no matter how much you all torment me. For some odd reason, I want to stay in the presents of the notorious Akatsuki, even of you Itachi.” Her gaze leveled with his, her pale cheeks flushing.
A smile touched his lips.
He leaned in, his lips a breath away from her own. For a split second she thought he was going to kiss her and she would let him if that meant he would let her stay with him.
“I usually leave that type of affect on beautiful women.” Her concentration on his full lips broke. “W-what?” She heard exactly what left those beautiful lips but didn't want to believe he actually said it. Sensing her rushing anger, he quickly changed the subject. “Are you going to eat tonight or am I going to have to make you eat?” His voice held a bit of a tease but he was far from joking.
“I don't really have much of an appetite tonight.” From the look in her eye he knew she was famished but never would admit it. “I want you to eat tonight. You don't have to eat at the table with the Akatsukis if you don't want to, hell you could even eat in here if you please.” Was Itachi Uchiha of the Akatsuki organization giving her a choice?
“I-I-I don't think I'm hungry. I'll be fine, really.” She directed her gaze outside once more, refusing her unexpected urges to lay her head up against his shoulder and tell him that she'd do anything he asked of her. Instead she mummified herself within the folds of her shoddy blanket. “Hinata,” She tuned out his voice, acting as if it was just her alone in the packed room. “Hinata,” He tried again, placing his hands firmly to the floor to push him up. She wanted to forget that he ever existed, forget his voice, his firm body pressed against her back. “Hinata,” There was no escaping his voice, his lips drawn to her ear.
“What Itachi?” “Nothing, it's just the name I keep hearing over and over in my head.” She grunted, pretending as if his words hadn't conjured turmoil within in the pit of her stomach.
“That's the corniest thing you could come up with? Where's the second rate banter that comes with it?” Sarcasm dripped with every word. “I guess there isn't one that I could think of fast enough.” His chuckle vibrated her very core. “That make me feel a whole lot better that you couldn't ridicule me with your words more so than you already have.” Her skin prickled as he rested his chin against her shoulder.
“I wouldn't want to torment my sunflower more than I already have, that wouldn't be fair.” “Wouldn't be fair?” She carefully turned her head at an angle, not to bump lips with him. “I'm trying to be nice…isn't that what you people call a kind gesture?” She nodded, soon stopping as she remembered that he was close.
“What's the point of being kind to you if you don't return it?” “Kindness isn't some policy that can give and take at any given time you feel like it Itachi. People have feeling whether you want to accept them or not. We tend to throw our emotions out into the open for someone to at least take notice but people like you take it and burry it away so no one else can ever find it..” Her chest swelled, her throat tightening. “People like me have feelings too,” His voice barely audible, shifting his position so his arms draped her waist.
Her heart fluttered.
“But if we let our emotion get to boisterous then our enemies would see through our attacks.” “I'm talking about feelings in general.” Hinata interrupted, feeling the light brush of his fingers tugging the small bow of her night gown. “Alright,” She could feel the burden he was carrying through his tired voice. “To be honest, I never was really fond of anyone but Sasuke. There were times when I thought I could love my mother and father but then I'd see the rage beneath my father eyes and knew I could never love people like them. People that expected you to be the best when you were nothing more than just an amateur. He expected so much from both me and Sasuke and we could do so little to please him. It felt bittersweet living among the Uchiha clan. Everyone was so lively, carefree. No one knew of all the pain that I and Sasuke had to bear. We nearly had to kill ourselves for our father to call off training.
Mother could never control father no matter how hard she tried to convince us she could. I couldn't take any more of the hatred that dwelled a prisoner in my heart. Living among my mother, father, and younger brother brought more and more hatred in my heart. The more I thought about ending their lives, the more I wanted to proceed with the idea. The sight of my fathers' corpse excited me, the foul stench of my aunts blood made me even more aware of how elusive I became for my family. I no longer wanted to carry the burden of my whole family so I destroyed the Uchiha clan.” “Do you have sudden urges like that still?” She was now well aware she had an S-ranked criminals arm around her. “No, I barely feel the need to be active in combat unless it's necessary.” He nuzzled his chin against her shoulder, the few dark wisps of hair that escaped his ponytail tickling her cheek. “I-Itachi, could I ask you something?” She openly clutched his hand, grabbing his attention. “What is it?” “H-how do you feel about me?” She felt heat rise to the nape of her neck.
“What do you mean?” He sounded skeptical. She worried over her lower lip, trying to find a way to clarify what she meant. “I-I mean do you h-h-have feeling for me?” Her voice hushed over the hum of the furnace. “Feeling for you?” The question left him silent, his arms slacking its hold of her. “I-I didn't mean to ask, just—“I do.” He spoke over her, no hesitation in his voice. “Y-you do?!” Her voice crack, her head swiveling as far as it could. “You don't believe me? Why would I be in here if I didn't like you?” She tried to think of all the possible reasons why he would indeed be in her room if he didn't have some sort of physical attraction to her.
Itachi tweaked her nose, soon kissing it after seeing her angered expression.
“Why the hell did you do that?!” She rubbed her reddened nose, glaring daggers at him. “You were thinking too hard. Made you look cute.”
Had he actually said she was cute?
Itachi pinned his bangs between his fingers, not sure of if he lost his mind or if he was losing it at this very moment. “T-thanks.” She tucked a few ebony strands of hair behind her ear, one of her shy gestures.
He shook his head, finding her even more attractive once her anger subsided.
“So does this mean that you're going to eat tonight?”
Sorry it took so long to update people, I was sick