Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ What Naruto Wants ❯ Content not suitable for some audiences ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Okay, I hope I pull this off right. The idea just came to me about a half hour ago. Think "What Women Want", but with both sexes. I'm sort of rushed, since I have to be somewhere in an hour and a half, so I hope I finish it before I leave. Heh, I was just figuring out an outline of the story while I was in the shower. Is it odd that I thought of this while bathing?

Anywho, I don't own Naruto. If I did, it would probably really suck, so you would have never heard of it.

/word/ = Someone's thoughts. I was going to use italics, but for some reason they never show up when I upload. Oh, and Naruto's thoughts are like that too. He's the only one who can hear them (no da), but I figured I'd let you know.

*************************************************************** *********

A Lightning bolt lit up the sky as Naruto hurried to get out of the rain. He had been training with the other members of Team 7 when Kakashi-sensei decided to end early because of the thunder storm. It had started out harmless enough, but quickly the light drizzle had turned into a down pour.

Naruto was cursing his bad luck. He had been so close to beating Sasuke! Well, at least according to him. Another bolt of lightning forked above, followed immediately by thunder. Hadn't he heard something about the time between the lightning and the thunder measuring how close you were to the eye of the storm? He quickened his pace.

"Almost home," He thought aloud after seeing the building he lived in.

He was just a few yards from the staircase leading to his apartment when… CRACK!! There was a bright flash of light followed by darkness.

……………………… …………………………̷ 0;………………………… 230;……………

When Naruto awoke, he felt sore all over. There was light streaming in through a crack in the curtains on his bedroom window.

"Uhnnn…" He groaned as he tried to sit up in his bed. He looked around, and saw Iruka asleep in a chair next to his bed. "Iruka-sensei…?"

At the mention of his name, Iruka blinked his eyes open.

"Naruto, you're awake!!" He beamed at Naruto. /I'll kill you if you ever make me worry like that again!/

"What are you talking about? What did I do?" Naruto asked defensively.

Iruka looked at Naruto for a moment. "Naruto, what are you talking about?" /Oh no! What if he has brain damage??/

Naruto was too confused to even acknowledge that last comment. "What happened to me?"

"You don't remember?" /Maybe he has amnesia!/ "Someone found you in front of your house unconscious. You were taken to the hospital and slept for two days!"

"But what happened?"

"The doctors say you were struck by lightening."

"Wow, really? Cool! If I survived, that must mean I'm invincible!!"

Iruka punched him in the back of the head. "You idiot! You could've been killed!" /I don't know what I would have done if that had happened!/

"Ow!" He clutched his head. /Iruka-sensei sure does hit hard for someone who was worried…/

"Anyway, they said you would be okay, so I was allowed to take you home. You're really lucky, you know that?" He got up and stretched. "I have to go now, Naruto. I have a class to teach."

"Iruka-sensei…"

"Yes, Naruto?"

"Did you stay with me the whole time?" Naruto blushed a bit.

"I stayed with you as much as I could," Iruka answered. /Oh my gawd!! Naruto is so cute!! I just want to squeeze him to death when he's like this!/

Naruto couldn't help but just gape at Iruka. /Did he just say what I think he just said?? He sounded like some creepy valley-girl!/ ((AN: I don't know if there are valley-girls in the Naruto universe, and I don't care.))

"What's wrong, Naruto?" Iruka smiled. "Is it really that surprising that I'd look after you?" /Naruto's acting weird today… I hope there are no lasting effects. He does look adorable with that expression on his face, though./

"What are you talking about!? You're the one acting weird!"

Iruka gave Naruto an alarmed look. "Uhm, Naruto… I think you had better take it easy for the rest of the day." He gently pushed Naruto back into a laying position. /I hope he isn't nuts!/ "I'm sorry, but I've really gotta go. I already took a day off of work. Will you be okay while I'm gone?"

"Yeah, just go, I'll be fine," /I don't want to be around him if he's acting crazy./

"Alright, I'll stop by later to see if you're okay. I think it's best if you stay in bed for today, Naruto," Iruka smiled and left, closing the bedroom door behind him.

Naruto waited until he heard the front door close before he got up and started to dress himself. /Iruka-sensei sure is acting weird./ Naruto smiled to himself. /Maybe he was so worried about me, he didn't sleep too much…/ ((AN: He's smiling at the thought of Iruka caring, not because he wants him to worry and be uncomfortable.))

After grabbing a bite to eat (to drink, actually; He was too lazy to make food, so he just had a glass of milk), Naruto checked the time. 7:04 a.m.. /Weird, I slept for two days and managed to wake up early./

Since it had been a few minutes since Iruka left, Naruto figured it was probably safe to leave. He didn't want to get yelled at for ignoring his ex-sensei and getting yelled at, but he was mostly afraid that Iruka might say weird girly things again.

/What should I do…?/ Naruto thought as he left his apartment. His eyes lit up. /Maybe Sakura-chan was worried about me! I bet when she sees me, she'll throw herself at me and say something like: `Oh, Naruto! I was so worried! The thought of losing you made me realize how important you are to me!!' …Yeah. That's exactly what she'll do.) ((AN: Don't we all love his way of thinking?))

Naruto checked all the places he thought Sakura might be, meaning he wandered around aimlessly until he happened to find her.

"Hi, Sakura-chan!!"

Sakura smiled at Naruto. "Hi, /Sasuke/ Naruto. Are you /Sasuke/ feeling better?"

". . ." /has she lost it, too?/ since Naruto was just happy she even knew he had been "sick", he just decided to ignore the `Sasuke's' and answer her. "Of course I'm better! I'm Uzumaki Naruto, after all!!" He preformed a dorky thumbs up, beaming at her.

"That's /Sasuke/ good. I was a little /Sasuke/ worried about you. /Sasuke/ Kakashi-sensei said you were /Sasuke/ struck by /Sas-/ lightening. /-uke/"

"Sakura-chan…" He had the feeling this would get him slapped, but "Why do you keep saying `Sasuke' in between everything? It's annoying." /Is this some sort of new method of getting that jerk's attention, or something?/

"What are /Sasuke/ you talking about Naruto?" She felt his cheek with the back of her hand (His forehead was covered by his forehead-protector) to check for a fever. "Are you /Sasuke/ sure you're /Sasuke/ feeling better?"

"Yeah, I feel fine." He was starting to get annoyed. Sasuke even irritated him when he wasn't around! "Stop saying Sasuke, it's weird. Why would you want to say that loser's name all the time anyway?"

"Naruto, you idiot!!" She smacked him upside the head. "Don't say things like that about Sasuke-kun! Go to bed if you're still sick." ((AN: She sure is nice to someone she thinks is sick, isn't she?))

"But… Sakura-chan~!!"

She "Hmph-ed" and stomped away from him. /That didn't go well…/ He thought.

"What's wrong with everyone today?" He said aloud. "Everybody's acting really weird… Maybe I'm imagining it."

He decided to take Sakura's advice and go home and sleep. /Maybe I am still sick…/

As he headed back home, he noticed Kakashi in the window of a book store. The older man saw him and smiled. ..Well, under the mask he did. He raised a finger indicating he'd be out in a minute, so Naruto figured he'd better wait outside for him. Ten minutes later, he came out of the store.

"Naruto, I see you've finally woken up! The team's been worried about you, you know." /Hee hee, I can't wait to read my new book!/

Naruto pointed dramatically at Kakashi's bag he got from the store. "Kakashi-sensei, did you buy another one of those perverted books?"

Kakashi's squinted his eyes mischievously. "Why, do you want to see it?" /I bet you'd just love to get your filthy little hands on my precious book!/

"Yeah right! Like I'd want to be a pervert like you!" (Still pointing)

"Now, now… don't say that. /I bet you read dirty things all the time/ Everyone needs a way to relax. /Like reading about big breasted beauties, and strong, muscular young men…/"

"Eh??" He had known Kakashi-sensei was dirty-minded, but he had never been so openly perverted like that. "That's not relaxing!" He brightened a bit. "If you want to relax, you should eat! That always relaxes me!"

Kakashi didn't look like he was listening. /Teasing each other with light touches, undressing one another and gently nipping at oh-so-soft flesh…/

Naruto's eyes bugged out. "Kakashi-sensei!! Stop talking about that stuff, I don't wanna hear it!"

Snapping out of his daze, Kakashi looked at Naruto. "Hear what? Naruto, you must be imagining things. So, how long ago did you wake up?" /They'd moan softly, rubbing against each other…/

"What the hell?? Don't try and change the subject! And I said stop talking about that stuff!!"

Kakashi patted Naruto on the head. "I think you should get some rest, Naruto." /And then he'd <Content not suitable for some audiences>/ He blinked a few times. "Naruto… are you alright?"

Naruto had fainted after a massive nose-bleed, and was now on the ground. Kakashi quickly knelt down and pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket, trying to wipe up most of the blood. /Was he hurt worse than we thought?/ As Naruto came to, he was startled to see how close his instructor was.

"Ack! Get away from me, you pervert!!" He pushed away and stood up.

"Are you okay, Naruto? I think I should take you back to the hospital…"

"I'm fine, you just surprised me! Don't talk about things like that when I'm around, you creep!!" Naruto snatched the hankie away and used it to sop up the rest of his blood.

"Are you sure you're okay?" /What's he talking about?/ "Well… you can keep that hankie." He started to walk away, but stopped and said "Go rest, Naruto. It's not every day that you get hit by lightening. Don't worry about missions tomorrow." /Heh heh heh… now to read my book!/

Naruto felt like screaming at the top of his lungs. /What the hell is wrong with everyone today??/ He turned and started heading home again. /Today has been such a long day, and it's barely past nine! Maybe all I need is a nap. A long, long nap…/

*************************************************************** *********

So, what do you think? I tried as best as I could to keep Naruto in character. The others… well, I wanted to take their characters, but exaggerate their funny flaws. I really can't wait to get to the other characters, but I'm having a little trouble putting this together right. Flames and reviews are appreciated. A few suggestions would be nice too. Oh, and I want to thank the lovely reviewers of my other fics. I might not have continued writing any fickes at all if it wasn't for those nice comments.