Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ What Naruto Wants ❯ On The Count Of Three, You Die ( Chapter 6 )

Oh my gawd, it's been a long, long time since I've updated, hasn't it? I'm so sorry! I couldn't help it! You should know that it's not good to force yourself to write! Not only have I been in the middle of a huge writer's block, but I've been so busy lately. I just started work, and I'm always out either spending money or goofing off with my friends when I'm not working. I just hope I'll be able to continue the story smoothly after going for so long with out writing… Well, just cross your fingers and hope this chapter doesn't suck, okie??

I doesn't be ownin' no Naruto. Not now, not never.

.Chapter 6…...

Naruto stuffed a handful of chips into his mouth irritably. Stupid Lee. I could have found out what those Nins from the Sand were doing here if it hadn't been for him showing up and pestering me. He licked the salt off his fingers with a scowl. I'd hate to have to hang around such an annoying person all the time. How could anyone put up with such an obnoxious guy like that? *Somewhere Sakura, Sasuke, and Kakashi got the feeling Naruto was saying or thinking something stupid*

He stuffed the chip bag away and went into his room. The absence of sunlight from the boarded up windows made the room quite dark. He was almost considering giving up on being awake when he heard a knock on the door. He stayed silent; hoping the person responsible for the sound would just leave after a while. After a few more knocks, he heard a voice from the other side of the door.

"Hey! Naruto, I know you're there! Open up, you moron!"

"Shikamaru!" Naruto exclaimed with relief as he un-bolted the door. He never thought he'd be so happy to see the boy

"What the hell have you been doing? Everyone says you've been acting like a psycho." /What stupid thing are you doing now?/

"What?? They're the psychos! Do you have any idea what kind of things are on their minds!?"

The dark-haired boy only scowled in reply. /Idiot./

Just then, Naruto remembered Shikamaru's suggestion to talk to Sasuke. His eyes suddenly narrowed and he pointed menacingly at the lazy ninja.

"You bastard!!"

Taking a step back, Shikamaru asked, "What the hell are you screaming about?"

"What were you thinking, telling me to see Sasuke?"

"Oh… that." He looked off to the side. "Well, what's wrong? What happened?"

"You knew, didn't you??" Naruto brought his face close to Shikamaru's, curling his lip in disgust. "Don't lie to me! You knew!!"

Shikamaru's eyes widened as he suddenly realized that he had made a big mistake. He hadn't figured Naruto would be so upset over Sasuke's thoughts. Maybe a little shocked, but enraged? /What does that guy think about, anyway??/

"Oh, you want to know what he thinks about. Do you really want to know??"

"N-no…" /I don't even want to think about how bad it must be…/

"Damn-straight, you don't!"

There was a silence between them as horrible images filled each of their minds.

"…"

"So what do you want?" Naruto finally asked.

"Tch. Your team mate, Sakura asked me to come see what's wrong with you." /Actually, she told me to. Then Ino beat me with her shoe until I agreed…/ Shikamaru rubbed the side of his head as he remembered.

"Did you tell them?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Do you think they'd believe me?" /Idiot./

"Well, you know what's wrong, so why the hell did you come here??"

Suddenly, Shikamaru's eyes widened and he spoke to Naruto in a hushed voice. "Do you have any idea what Ino would do to me if I didn't come here??" /Think happy thoughts… think happy thoughts…/

"…"

"…" /Pretty ponies and butterflies…/

"Anyway…" Naruto trailed off, hoping the other boy would finish the sentence, since he had no idea how to respond.

Clearing his throat, Shikamaru changed the subject. "So… are you planning on hiding in this dump for the rest of your life?"

"I'm not hiding!" The blonde shouted defensively. "I'm just… ducking a few people. …Like Sasuke." He added with a glare.

"Well, are you ever going to do something about this?" The brown-haired boy yawned. "What did Hokage-sama say about all this?" /She should have some kind of idea…/

"I haven't talked to her yet."

"What? Are you stupid? Out of all the people, she's the one you don't see??" /Why do you just keep getting dumber?/

"I tried, asshole! The hag was busy or something."

"Well, try again." He turned around and opened the door. "I have better things to do than hang around here. Good luck with fixing your… problem." He raised a hand over his shoulder and closed the door behind him.

Gah! Why does everyone have to be so useless??

…………….

The streets of Konoha were nearly empty as Naruto hurried toward the Hokage's office. He had waited until night time to leave. He had considered wearing his disguise again, but thought against it. The idea of explaining why he was in drag to Tsunade just wasn't something he wanted to do.

The door to the entrance of the building was locked. Not that he had expected it to be open this late, but there was nothing wrong with hoping. He could see a light coming from the window on the second floor, so he knew the hag was there. He examined the lock on the door. Surely it would be a simple task to break into the building. He was an exceptional ninja, after all.

"Yo, Hag!! Open up the door!" He shouted at the top of his lungs as he pounded on the door. "Come on! Lemme in!!"

He continued to make as much noise as humanly possible until he finally heard someone inside the building. He also heard several someones shouting various obscenities at him, but he was ignoring them.

Naruto could barely jump back in time as the door flew open.

"What the hell do you want, Naruto??" A very angry Tsunade growled. /I was just about to…/

"Hey, what are you doing here, shrimp?" Jiraiya asked as he stepped out from behind The Fifth. /You always show up at just the wrong moment…/

"Get back up stairs, you idiot!" Tsunade commanded as she shooed the man away. /Don't worry, I'll be up in a second so we can finish./

Before Naruto could wonder about Tsunade's last thought, she turned back to him. "Now you had better have a damn good reason for disturbing me, or I'm going to beat you into next month!"

"I…" It's very difficult to remember anything when a woman like Tsunade threatens you.

"I'm giving you until the count of three."

"Wait!"

"One…" /If you came here for nothing, I'll tear you apart!/

"I swear it's important!"

"Two…" /First I'll rip off your legs…/

"I can't think with you counting like that!!"

"Three!" /Time to pay, runt!/

Tsunade had begun to creep closer to Naruto, a psychotic grin twisting her face. "Now to teach you some respect, brat!!"

"Hold on, you homicidal bitch!! I have something really important to tell you, but I can't say it out here!"

"What did you just call me??" /I'll kill you!/

Naruto's life flashed before his eyes as the woman lunged at him. This is it… I'm gonna die. I can't believe this is the end! Tsunade grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. It seemed like everything was moving in slow motion. I'm gonna be killed by a crazy old hag!!

"Uhm… Tsunade?" And as suddenly as it all started, it stopped. Jiraiya peeked his head through the door to see Naruto dangling in the air as Tsunade was preparing to chop him into oblivion. "Why are you trying to kill Naruto?"

………………………& #8230;….

Yeah, it's short. But at least it's something, right?

I blame my cold for this chapter's, uhm… smallness. I've felt like crap all day, and I had to work. I tried sleeping, but since my body hates me and keeps refusing to sleep, I decided to finish this chapter. I'm sorry for taking so long! Actually, if it hadn't been for all the wonderful reviews, I pro'lly wouldn't have ever updated again. *Dramatic mode: Begin* It's your precious reviews that keep me going! It's almost like you're adding a little love into each review, and it's that love that let's me continue writing!! *Dramatic mode: End*

O_o… Anyway, review. I'll love ya for it. I should be able to update sooner this time, too. Now that I've started writing again, it'll be easier to keep going. …I hope. Well, at least I have a few good ideas for the coming chapters. And, like always, I always appreciate suggestions.