Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ Sharing ❯ Don't Lie to Yourself ( Chapter 5 )

Sharing

 

Faced with the very real possibility that she could lose her hair, rookie coordinator Hikari Kamiko suffered a very emotional nervous breakdown in front of a small audience in a ladies restroom. Though much in the vein of Hikari, she bounces back from this momentary heartache and prepares for the challenge before her. Before leaving the hospital however, she meets with and talks to eight year old cancer survivor, child prodigy, and pokemon coordinating fan Alexis O'Connor, and gets a new perspective on her current issue with Nozomi.

 

She leaves, and is confronted by her mother via videophone wanting to know what is going on, but she says very little. After that, she gives a statement to the world in her hometown of Twinleaf. After the speech, she goes home, with her mother now demanding answers to her previous questions. After much coaxing, Hikari emotionally reveals everything to her mother. Ayako responded tearfully, but thankful that Hikari was honest with her. Any previous friction between her and Ayako is supposedly eliminated after a long hug between mother and daughter.

 

Nozomi had great concern that she was losing control of her own planned out rivalry, but those concerns were eventually squashed after she concluded that her fears were the result of hallucinations due to her concussion. Just as it seemed that everything was back to normal for Nozomi as far as her rivalry with Hikari was concerned, she was hit with a major shocker as her mother calls up from out of the blue knowing full well the brunt of the activities her daughter has been a part of over the last month and a half. Hitomi Kobashi has demanded that her daughter come home as soon as she can to explain herself. What will Nozomi say to her mother? Will Hitomi buy any of it at all?

 

NOTE: The chapter is entirely in the point of view of Nozomi.

 

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Pokemon, a creation of one Satoshi Tajiri, and is produced domestically (in the United States) by Pokemon USA/TAJ/The Pokemon Company, and internationally by Shogakukan and OLM. I personally own nothing and make nothing by

writing this.

 

(Chapter 5- Don't Lie to Yourself)

 

<November 23, 2006> (Thanksgiving Day)

 

I couldn't tell you for the life of me the type of feelings going through my head, as I am about to head home to see my mother face to face for the first time in about six months and the first time I've talked to her prior to her phone call out of nowhere in about two or three. I phoned her late Wednesday evening to tell her that I would be home in time for Thanksgiving. She said that I should take my time, as she didn't want to hear any details over the phone rather that it would be best for me and her that I get my many thoughts together and then tell all on Thursday.

 

It's difficult to say what I will do when I talk to her. My mother and I have always had a very good relationship since I was very young. The reason I don't see her as often as I would like is because due to her profession, she works insanely long hours. We try to make contact as often as possible, but both of us have become occupied with our own pet projects as of late.

 

My mother is a lawyer who is currently part of a very large law office, but is slowly making the transition to being her own boss and running her own practice. It's been something she's talked about ever since one year prior to me leaving for my journey. I completely supported her, despite the fact that we knew that we would experience a great amount of disconnect due to this major life change.

 

My pet project, of course has been to foster contention with Hikari, but I went into this endeavor knowing full well that I had to keep everything my own little secret, or face the consequences of conning everyone into believing that there was true dissention between me and Hikari.

 

I told myself over a month ago that if there were ever someone that I would share my master plan with, it would be my mother. The only problem is that I said those things while in a hospital bed, and very much incapacitated. Those thoughts may very well have been more hallucinations than backup plans, because the idea of my mother being a part of this cooked up farce is almost humorous by design.

 

Well, all shall soon be answered as I continue on this long early morning walk. Looking at my poketch, I see that it is a little after 6:00 a.m., and I am making near perfect time as my home is about 10 minutes away. Taking in the fresh morning air, I become more confident than I was when I made my trek at midnight. When I began this walk, my travel mood resembled more of me beginning a walk on the road to perdition than a mere visit with 'mommy dearest'.

 

Perhaps after I tell her what I am willing to say and not what she forces to say after it is interrogated out of me, she will only subject me to the rest of my childhood in a state of purgatory. In that situation, I will hear from mom the words 'ethics' and 'morals' and 'tradition' among other anaphors inserted within my head as she sets me straight about why I was wrong to go this particular route to help someone who I believed only needed some minor coaching to get to the next step.

 

I have no choice but to consider every premise that I may encounter when I see my mother. The truth is that there is no guarantee that she will believe the fact that I have this much dislike for someone that I have in fact met less than five times. And if what she told me over the phone is true-- that there are people out there that are legitimately questioning my sanity, it would only make sense to clear the air and prevent things from getting out of control as far as that question is concerned.

I don't enjoy lying to my mother under any circumstance, but there is another part of me which says that if I can get away with saying how much I hate Hikari here and now, it'll be smooth sailing to the end of my feud with Hikari, whenever that may happen.

 

I see my house. I take a deep breath, preparing myself for whatever I have to face when I see her. All of my plans could either go straight down the toilet, or I can continue my work to form the rivalry without any interference from mom. I won't know what path my plans will take until I see my mother, which should be in about two minutes, as I head to our condominium that me and mom have lived in since I was about nine years old.

 

I head to the front door at about 6:15 a.m., and proceed to ring the doorbell to my house. I only have to wait about ten seconds, which gave me very little time to consider any final ideas on what to say before the door is opened. I stand there, and see my mother Hitomi, which might as well be me looking into the future, due to the fact that we look very much alike despite the age difference.

 

I greet my mother first. "Good morning mom."

 

"Good morning, Zoey. And Happy Thanksgiving." She says, using my nickname that dad gave me since I was born. My mother has never particularly cared for 'Zoey', but has called me it since dad died. The (nick) name Zoey means life in Greek, and dad was told at an early age that he would not be able to have children. To him, I was his life, and I believe especially with how things ended for him that no matter what, a part of him would always live in me.

 

Mom would tell me much later in life that dad gave me my real name Nozomi not simply because it rhymed very well with her name, but for what in his mind were more symbolic reasons. He always told my mom that along with life, Nozomi represented hope, and that 'one would never be that far from the other', and that's the way he hoped that my relationship with mom would remain.

 

She comes out of the house entrance and gives me a big hug. I couldn't tell whether she was doing it because we hadn't seen each other in several months or due to the fact that I've stirred up such great controversy in the pokemon world that she fears this big disconnect from me after the damage has already been done.

 

I return her previous greeting after just a few seconds. "Happy Thanksgiving, mom." Although we've had a loving relationship as far back as I can remember the word 'loving' is not the word I would use to describe our bond at all. 'Odd' would be much more appropriate.

 

She's the type of mother who will scream and yell at you for doing something wrong one minute, or in the case of dad and me one hour, and hold you, cuddle you and protect you from harm and danger the next. Talk about a serious case of bipolarity. For all I know, she has never had it checked, but me and my extended family have never had to worry about mom, because she always had a strong head on her shoulders, even after dad's untimely death.

 

"Come on in, dear. I've got something to show you." Mom says to me with a higher level of happiness and excitement than what I have been inclined to expect in the past.

 

"You've been away for almost eight months now. Our family and friends knew that you would come home for either Thanksgiving or Christmas, so I connected with them either by phone or by mail and told them to have whatever gifts, letters or other odds and ends they had for you ready prior to Thanksgiving. So, I made no changes whatsoever to your room, aside from the care packages that the Kobashi's and the Saito's (Hitomi's maiden name) have sent your way placed throughout you room." My mother says this while leading me to my room.

 

In my room, which over the past several months I had obviously forgotten exactly how it looked, there is just about anything that a pokemon coordinating and training fanatic could ask for, combined with the modesty and conservatism that my mother would prefer from her only daughter. The room is painted in a nice blend of a somewhat light hue of red (like my hair) with a black trim.

 

On the walls are several posters. That much I could tell you if I went blind tomorrow. The two most notable posters however are one of Ayako being officially presented her Sinnoh Grand Festival trophy. I would look at it several times a day and tell myself that if I dedicated myself to working hard and learning all that I could, this along with much more would be in my future.

 

The second most important poster in my room has absolutely nothing to do with pokemon. It is a poster featuring images from the 1996 gold medal winning U.S. Olympic Team from Atlanta. The most glaring of the images on the photo is Bela Karolyi holding an injured Kerri Strug. It inspires me in two different ways. One is that no matter how hard you work towards setting goals, your dreams can be shattered in the blink of an eye.

 

The other lesson that I learn from this poster is that you only have as much ability as you allow yourself to have. In this world, we dictate our own destinies, it's just that fate will often throw curveballs in our face and we as imperfect creatures don't care enough to bring a catcher's mask.

 

Thinking about this iconography while on my journey has given me the necessary confidence needed to not only win three ribbons, but also fend against the unpredictable Hikari as well. Though I cannot dictate the girl's thoughts, I can be a better discipline of myself by willing myself to go on, even if it hurts; much like Kerri Strug did at Atlanta.

 

As I came face to face with my bedroom entrance, mom finally steps aside to let me open the door. She has in all likelihood set up a surprise for me to find on the other side. I don't think much of it until I actually open the door and see mountains of letters, clothing, outdoor accessories, food and just about any other essentials that could be imagined.

They were piling on my bed, covering my carpet, and overflowing the inside of my closet next to my numerous tuxedos. Wherever you could imagine a place inside of a child's bedroom, that place was occupied by... stuff! Nothing really differentiated anything from the next thing aside from the fact that all of it was stuff piled on top of more stuff.

 

As my eyes seemingly imitated active windshield wipers combing the encapsulated premises, I came across something distinguishing itself from the rest of the materialistic pigsty that is my bedroom at this moment. It was my desk where I did most of my grammar school homework and made it the ultimate task to formulate the perfect pokemon team of six.

 

The thing that was different to the desk compared to the last time that I saw it was the two very high stacks of letters from what I presume to be members of my extended family scattered all over the world.

 

"Oh my." I exclaim as I laid my eyes upon the sight of the twin towers of personal correspondence. I walk to the display and immediately take the first letter from the taller of the stacks. I am pleasantly surprised by the name of the person on the return address.

 

"Hey! It's from Sebastian!" Sebastian is my younger cousin from the paternal side of the family. Outside of all of the members of my immediate nuclear family and my late best friend Makoto, he has been my number one supporter.

 

He is currently in England being formally educated at a boarding school, but promised me prior to me leaving for my journey that he would catch me on television or radio whenever he could spare the time. Opening the letter, I read that he is very proud of me right now and hopes for nothing but the best as I continue.

 

What I didn't expect he would write about was the fact that he was behind me in my budding feud with Hikari. While everyone else that I've met, seen or talked to since my now infamous interview one month or so ago has viewed me with immeasurable scorn, Sebastian has given me complete support 'no matter what you do or say' being his own words.

 

He goes on to say that 'whatever that girl must have done to you, she deserves what she gets from the best new coordinator in the entire world'. To say the very least, the boy idolizes me and he believes that I can do no wrong. How sweet. His praise, while meaning well, is good for a laugh or two in my book. Oh well. He's still family.

 

Upon reading his letter, I take a post-it note out of my desk drawer and write down a note to remind myself to respond to him as soon as possible. I write on the post-it, `RE: To Sebastian X. Kobashi', place it on his letter and set it aside in a new pile for response letters and `Thank You' notes. I'll need to thank him and wish him the best in boarding school. I go through all of the other letters after making the note to write back to Sebastian. In them are words of encouragement from family and friends, and in all there were almost 100 letters.

 

I got a large amount of money as most family and friends who wrote knew that I would need it at the start of my journey. I was surprised when I found that with the abundance of letters, the money appeared to add up just as quickly, and I got a total of over $3,500 that my mother promised she would place little by little in savings once the holiday weekend ended.

 

Taking a second look at my poketch today, I see that opening up those many letters and scouring through the many gifts from relatives and friends has taken up over three hours of my time since arriving home. It is now 9:53 a.m. Making numerous changes and adjustments to my room to turn the mountains into more suitable molehills, I am once again interrupted by my mother, who raps at my bedroom door.

 

"Zoey?" she asks quietly. "Could you come in the living room, please? I believe we have something to discuss." The joy that I previously experienced while looking through all of the gifts given to me by close friends and relatives was quickly shattered by the mere thought of that final word which came out of her mouth.

 

We had something to 'discuss'. I'm not a shallow idiot. I know exactly what she wants to discuss. She wants to get to the bottom of why I have seemingly become public enemy number one in pokemon coordinating. I have to stand my guard for this one. I need to shoot from the hip and make up one of the more convincing stories that I possibly can, because in this instance, the truth really did hurt.

 

I leave my room for the first time in now almost four hours and take a trip to the nearby restroom, trying to draw out the inevitable as long as I possibly could. After about three or four minutes, I come face to face with my mother, who is sitting in the family room.

 

The warmth of the room cannot be ignored, as I noticed in the other room the oven is on and holds what I presume to be a small part of our Thanksgiving dinner. My mother motions for me to sit across from her and I silently acquiesce to her request.

 

My mother starts by taking one deep breath. "Okay, dear. Here's how it's gonna work. You can choose to do this either the easy way, or you can choose to do this the hard way. The easy way, is that you tell me the truth, nothing more and nothing less, and I will figure out what to do with you when I find out the whole truth.”

 

“The hard way is that I will force the truth out of you one way or the other, so no matter what happens I will get what I want. The ball is most certainly in your court, Zoey. With that said, whenever you're ready to speak, I'm all ears." Mom then crosses her left leg with her right and crosses her arms as well.

 

Mom is determined to get her way, and I can't say that I blame her. Though her demeanor over the past several days might have suggested to some people a great level of apathy on her part as it pertained to my comments, I should not be and am not fooled. A great way to describe my mother is a soft-spoken assassin; a snake waiting in the weeds for the perfect opportunity to strike at her prey. Nobody knows about this behavior of my mom more than I do; I've lived with the woman for most of my young life.

 

"What have you seen or heard so far that you would consider 'incriminating' about me?" I ask this hoping to better formulate my story.

 

"Only your rookie challenge interview. That's all." I am silently cheering this lack of information possessed by mom. The fact is, the less that she knows now, the less that I have to make up on the spot. The rookie challenge interview painted a picture of a very arrogant, lazy, loudmouthed and conceited girl in Hikari. If I can remember at least half of what I said a month ago and paint a clearer, more transparent portrait, then I will have accomplished my goal and will avoid any scolding from mother dearest.

 

"Okay, mom. You wanted the truth? You've got the truth." I reply. "I met Hikari back in the month of June. She was at her very first pokemon contest, you know? You would think that someone pursuing the endeavor of their first ever contest would be somewhat nervous and jittery, trying to make heads or tails of the whole situation, right? The fact that she is now a part of the same spectacle that she has watched on TV as a young girl just a few months prior would give anyone nervous jitters.”

 

“Well, when I saw her for the first time, I was absolutely appalled at her behavior towards everyone. The way she walked into the contest house, you would have thought that she owned the place. I've never seen a rookie coordinator more arrogant and more aggressive than I saw Hikari. As you know, she's the daughter of the coordinator Ayako, who is one of the main reasons why I became a pokemon coordinator, and I couldn't for the life of me imagine that someone with that kind of attitude and standoffishness could be the daughter of one of the classiest and most graceful Grand Festival champions of all time."

 

"If I can recall back to those two days, she left a real sour taste in my mouth, mom. After she got off the phone with her mother, she bragged about how she was going to 'wipe the floor' with whichever coordinator or coordinators got in her way. After a quarterfinals match with one of her traveling buddies, whom I defeated, it came down to me and Hikari in the semifinals. Prior to the match, she told me in a private conversation that it would be a tragic mistake to take it easily on her, because 'I will leave you naked and exposed for the viewing public to see' and those are the exact words that she used on me.”

 

“After a long and hard fought battle, which I won, I went in her direction to shake her hand, and in the poorest showing of sportsmanship imaginable, she refused. When I went backstage just a few minutes later, she was once again on the phone with her mother, crying like the world's biggest baby getting her lollipop stolen about how she tried her best and how she did things 'the right way'. I almost scoffed out loud upon hearing this, and she even refused to applaud for me when I eventually won my ribbon. As I left the contest house, she had this profanity laced tirade that she screamed at me saying, and I'll clean this up for you, 'next time, I won't be so... f-ing easy on your… rear end'. I thought very little to nothing of it, because I had not planned on ever seeing her again in competition."

 

"Then about four months pass, and along comes the rookie challenge at the Sevii Islands. I came there not expecting to see her, but very surprised when I walked around one day and heard a heckler near the beach as I was practicing a new routine with Misdreavus and Flareon. It turned out to be Hikari, who was also invited to the rookie challenge. I was angry at her for the abusive obscenities she screamed in my direction, and this act of making fun of me and calling me names like 'redheaded stepchild', 'half-girl', 'tuxedo terror', and the one that truth be told got a bit of a chuckle out of me; 'Tom Boy Kobashi', all of them kind of sent me over the edge. That's why I said the things that I said in my interview, but Hikari is a very crafty young girl.”

 

“She says and does all of these incriminating things away from the other coordinators or casual observers and cameras, so nobody except me has caught her in the act of verbally breaking me down. That is why it seems that I appear to be the bad girl and Hikari looks to be the good girl. She may very well be the world's greatest actress, because when she plays the part, she can be the most convincing innocent, naive little girl, but I see her for what she truly is; a stuck-up, stubborn and arrogant girl who was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. You wanted the truth? There's the truth. That's my story, mom, and I'm sticking to it." I can only hope and pray to whatever gods exist that she bought my story and will no longer try to press me for any of the real details.

 

Those insults, though obviously not directed towards me by Hikari, are just some of the more tame insults that I've heard at contest houses region wide. Some outspoken traditionalists have lambasted me for not falling in line, and not being a uniform coordinator. I wear tuxedos and I am a girl, and that appears to be a problem with some people. I do that because I'm comfortable in that garb, and until someone from the head offices tells me that I can no longer wear so-called boy's clothing, then I will continue to do that which I'm comfortable doing, and that's that.

 

"Okay, but how do you explain this... stipulation that you two now have?" mom replies. Breaking down the reasons why I have so much 'hatred' for Hikari was relatively easy compared to the bridge that I am currently facing by trying to explain the stipulation. Because Hikari was the one who told the world about the deal we made at the emergency room, the origins behind how the wager came about will more than likely be taken with a grain of salt by mom. I'll have to carefully weigh my words so as not to incriminate myself any more than necessary with what I know.

 

I form a story where I went to Hikari and asked her point blank why she said the things she said to me. Those things of course being the derogatory statements I told mom she said, but she has never actually said. I tell her that Hikari wanted to prove to me that the win I got against her back in June was nothing more than a fluke. I then continue, saying that Hikari felt that she was capable of defeating anyone in the world, but wanted to know if I felt the same about her abilities.

 

I gave her an emphatic 'no' and told her without hesitation that I thought her attitude was the one thing that hindered her from making any headway in coordinating. I tell mom that I told her that had she went into the coordinating business with some level of humility and respect for those that have come before her, she might have gotten the support of people that could have been a big help to her along the way.

 

She then comes up with the stipulation, and goads me into putting my money where my mouth is and put something of great importance or value on the line, like she did. I told the story assuming that she has not heard that it was in fact me who came up with the deal between Hikari and I, but the way I stated my peace made Hikari look even more brash and cocky than in the story where I described the first time that we met, because she is the one who confronts me to instigate her plan and catch me in the ruckus.

 

I can't tell by just looking into her eyes whether my mother believed a word that came out of my mouth. She has said absolutely nothing outside of pressing me for more information about the stipulation that was in reality my own brainchild. What I can tell that my mother is doing now is walking from her chair over to me while I'm still sitting on the sofa.

 

I give mom a very tentative look as she comes closer and closer towards my person. I have no idea what is going through this woman's head, but I have kept a very sharp glaze in her vicinity, never once taking my eyes off the woman who gave me life. Again the viewing of my mother in motion coming nearer and dearer to me causes me to look forward into the future, as I see much of myself in her.

 

She stands high atop of me, and I am very quickly reminded of just how small I am compared to the people that have come before me. I may become physically as big as a house, but looking at my mother will always cue me into the fact that no matter how big and strong you are, there is someone out there that has more important traits like intelligence and experience behind them. While I have seemingly waxed nostalgic about growing up and the influence that my mother has over me, my mother and I have not spoken a single word to each other.

 

"Zoey." she begins. "Do you remember what I told you before you started speaking to me about this Hikari situation?"

 

I am quite nervous right now, but my thoughts are not clouded enough to the point that I have forgotten her ultimatum to me at the start. "Yes." I reply with little vigor in my pitch. "You told me that... we could do this either the easy way, or we could do this the hard way, and that the ball was in my court."

 

"That's correct, dear. And knowing full well what that meant and still lying directly to my face? That makes me feel really sad, Zoey." Goddamnit! She didn't bite! Crap! What am I gonna do now?

 

"And you know what happens whenever I feel very sad, dear. I need to feel better. I need a good... laugh." She is slowly telling me this while holding up my left leg parallel to the cushions of the sofa in her direction. I already know what's going to happen, and I feel dread wash over me like rain water on an April afternoon.

 

"Mom? Come on, now. Is that really necessary? Can't we talk this over?" I beg and plead for her mercy, hoping to escape this ordeal unscathed. I know full well what she's going to do. She has used it so many times on me to get me to confess, you would think I'd be used to it, but I haven't grown immune to the treatment she is about to give to me.

 

She's a lawyer, but before that she worked for police departments as an interrogator, so she knows many ways to get people to fess up. I just wish it didn't have to be this one. I sincerely envy the criminals, because they are getting off easy compared to the punishment that mom is going to give to me in less than a minute.

 

Mom continues to rub my leg through my tattered and worm blue jeans, as she starts to head to my left foot. Encapsulated within my boot is my foot and a black sock, both of which she removes in near record time. My left foot is bare, and I couldn't count the number of times I asked my mother to please reconsider what she was going to do.

 

"I told you, Zoey, that one way or the other," she articulates, "I was going to get the truth out of you. Now do you want to talk, and give me the truth right now, or do I have to do something I just might regret?"

 

I look at her with stern eyes, promising myself in confidence that I wouldn't expose my own hand and tell anyone that my ill feelings towards Hikari were not authentic. With this pseudo-confidence, I said to her with my head held high and my heart idling at 7,000 beats per minute, "do your worst."

 

She then proceeds to grab my left ankle with her right hand and bring her left hand into the fray. I close my eyes anticipating the worst, as my mother begins to apply her greatest interrogation technique of them all; she is tickling me by one of my most sensitive spots, that being the soles of my feet. Mom has found one of my most glaring weaknesses; I am extremely ticklish, and once prompted with a touch of one of my sensitive areas, I burst out into uncontrollable laughter, much like right now.

 

Mom talks through the course of me laughing like a bunch of hyenas at the Laugh Factory. "Are you going to tell me the truth now, Zoey?"

 

I would respond to her request with an emphatic 'no', but I am unable to talk in the face of all of the giggling I'm doing. "Ha ha ha. Mom, stop it! Ha ha ha. Mom, stop! Damn it, that's not fair! Come on!"

 

Mom stops, I presume to scold me for cursing. "Are you going to tell me the truth or not?" I'm surprised that she didn't say anything about my profanity, but the look of confusion I give her is only a momentary one. I bring myself back to answer the question she asked. I show her a smile before I tell her "No."

 

My mom takes a deep breath. "You asked for it, Zoey." My mother goes back to my feet, this time using both of her hands to put the full force of her attack onto my right foot. I scream out in laughter for about ten seconds, but do not renege to her original request. I get a look into her eyes, and I see that this exercise is taking a lot out of her. All of a sudden, she stops her activity and stands up. She looks at me directly in the eyes, and darts her hands to the direction of my armpits. This causes me to make the difficult but necessary decision to wave the white flag, and tell my mother what really happened between me and Hikari.

 

"All right! All right! All right! Enough! Enough! For the love of god, don't do that, mom! You know better. I'll tell you the truth, mom. You've got what you want, mom. You win. I'll tell you everything."

 

While the soles of my feet are quite sensitive to the touch and will often cause me to laugh hysterically, my armpits are undoubtedly my most responsive area as far as bodily contact is concerned. One time, when my best friend Makoto and I were horsing around in my parent's house, he found this out the hard way. After about two minutes of tickling by my best friend and me screaming in laughter and begging him to stop, I passed out.

 

He was scared out of his mind, with the fearful thought that I might've literally died laughing. He told my parents what happened, and to their credit, they weren't mad. They were just disappointed that he didn't stop when I told him to. Another factor in their actions was most likely the fact that I was going to be okay.

 

Despite this assurance by the doctors, Makoto was pretty damn heartbroken about the entire situation, and when he saw me after waking up in the emergency room, he just could not stop crying and apologizing to me for what occurred.

 

Looking back on the ordeal, nothing I've ever seen was so cute and so pathetic at the same time. In all fairness, though, I should cut my late friend some slack, as we were only four years old at the time, and I could understand someone feeling a great amount of concern for causing their friend to pass out. Even if the friends were in their 30's and part of an unforeseen situation like we were, there would probably be much apologizing done in that scenario, as well.

 

He asked me while I was lying in the hospital bed, "Do you still want to be my friend, Nozomi?", and I'll admit that I cried a little when he said that. Not just for the simple fact that he valued our friendship so much, and felt that his actions ruined it, but because he was crying when he asked his question and the moment was quite emotional for the both of us. Another reason was that it was quite clear to me that my friend was suffering. I never did cry often, but he made me cry when he thought his mistake would cost him his best friend.

 

Perhaps he was fearful that I was going to tell him no, much like I told my mother 'no' to informing her of the truth about Hikari, but I will never know for sure. A big part of me wanted nothing more than to console him, which I did... somewhat. What I told him when he asked that fateful question was "Sure," and then I was bombarded with a big hug from my friend.

 

We always would have each other's backs and quite frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way. I miss Makoto every single day of my life, and wonder just what my life would be like if he was still alive. I look back, but it is very useless to dwell on that which I cannot control. Besides, Makoto will always have a place near and dear in my heart.

 

There are tears in my eyes as I face my mother, preparing myself to bear all. The tears are a combination of the tickling that she has done in the last few minutes and just the thoughts in my head concerning Makoto. It was a combination of elation and melancholy. "Maybe it's just best that I start from the beginning and come clean. Is there anything in particular that you want to know beforehand?"

 

"No." My mother simply replies.

 

I suck in a large amount of air. To prepare myself, I ask mom if I could have a glass of water before I start. She silently obliges with a nod and I pour one in the kitchen, where I see the items in place for a Thanksgiving meal for two. It's a non-traditional spread to say the very least.

 

On the table where we will soon eat is a loaf of pumpernickel bread, carrot and tomato soup, spinach quiche, a large bowl of garden salad, baked potatoes, pasta salad and the main course, which has not yet been prepared, two large filet mignon steaks. The only thing in this kitchen that I would consider traditional Thanksgiving grub is a pan with whole peeled yams. We Kobashi's have always been ones to buck tradition, and Thanksgiving is another example of this attitude that we share.

 

Returning back to the living room, I start telling my mother the truth before I sit back down. "Okay. The truth is that I have been concocting a plan of sorts over the last five months or so. The only person that knows about this as of today is me. Until you, that is. The fact is that I do not hate Hikari at all.”

 

“It's quite the opposite, in fact. She doesn't hate me either— that is to say that she didn't initially hate me until I said the things I said on the air. Honestly, I would hardly consider her to be arrogant, cocky or anything like that. I... made all of that stuff up. It's just not true."

 

"Then... what is true, Zoey?" My mother asks with a tinge of impatience lingering from her voice.

 

I take a deep breath and open up like a book. "When I first met Hikari back in June, she was in her very first contest in... I believe it was Jubilife City. She was nervous like everyone else would be in their first contest, and I was no exception when I had my first. She was dressed to the nines in a stylish pink party dress and getting her mother's opinion on how she looked. That's when I saw her. Glameow found an accessory which turned out to be the finishing touch to her appeal garb, and I saw my idol on the videophone screen.”

 

“I thought to myself at the time, 'well this is cool, Ayako's daughter is going to become a coordinator just like her mom'. I also said to myself we could be very good friends. When I got to know some more about her and spend time with her alone and away from her traveling companions, I saw someone that had a completely different philosophy of life than I had ever seen with anyone else.”

 

“If she was down or depressed, she wouldn't stay that way for long. I really liked that about her, and I guess in those moments that we had together, I told myself, you have to get to know this girl better, and you'll have a friend for life."

 

"After a while though, I saw her go out to make her appeal and do battle. She... is very good. If some things didn't go my way in our semifinal battle together with her Buneary and Glameow, she would've won. I think that there is something really special there, but if you're gonna be a great coordinator, that something special has to be let out on a more than consistent basis.”

 

“A part of me is concerned that Hikari is going out there every time in the hopes of trying to impress her mom. If she tries that, she'll never win. Her career will be a failure, and a true friend would not just sit back and allow that to happen without taking a stand. If you want to coordinate, you have to do it for you and only you. She... she may learn that, and she may not, but a part of me wanted to help her anyway I could as far as furthering her career."

 

"That night, and many nights after that, I thought long and hard about what way I could help her, but not make it appear that I was coaching her through the motions. The only thing I could think of was to make what would have probably become a friendly rivalry between two of Sinnoh's fastest rising young coordinators into the most intense feud in not just coordinating, but all sports, as well.”

“My only problem with executing this feud involved how I would start things and get the ball rolling. My answer came when I got selected to go to the rookie challenge back in September. I remember telling you about it, right?"

 

Mom nods her head. "That's right. I told you that I wanted to watch you in your interview, but couldn't because I was on vacation at the time."

 

"You never did tell me; how was Australia?"

 

"Great, but we're getting off subject, or rather, you are. Please continue, dear." Rats. Note to self; never try to get a lawyer off topic or you'll end up with either the short end of the stick or the long arm of the law.

 

"So, like I said, the rookie challenge was the answer to all of my problems. My plan was to go there and get an interview late in the challenge and... well... fire her up. Get her inspired in some way-- any way to make her want to improve and change her approach to pokemon contests. That is where the comments from the interview came about.”

 

“After my time was up, it was very clear to me that in the quest to light a fire underneath Hikari, I did the same to everyone that heard my interview. For the remainder of that day, all I got from people were... I can only describe them as disappointed stares. And no one would talk to me. Oh! No, no. That's wrong. The only person that was not forced to talk to me but did nevertheless was my roommate for the week, Cindy Chalmers of the Johto Region."

 

"She talked to me, because even though she believed that Hikari didn't deserve to have those things said about her, she thought it took some guts to say the things she said. The next day, Hikari came to me and asked me calmly if I really thought no one could take her seriously if you don't take yourself seriously.”

 

“So I laid out my end of the stipulation and then she came up with hers, and that was the end of our conversation; about five minutes or so." I don't think mom needs to know about the time spent in non-urgent ER, or the incident on the boardwalk the day after my comments.

 

The less said about those things, the better. Besides, nothing has been said about it in the media, and that is for the best. The fact that the media was only allowed to interview coordinators at the rookie challenge is what saved me from further embarrassment.

 

"I went through the rest of the challenge not seeing Hikari, and we promised each other as a means of making sure that neither of us would back away from our deal that we would talk about in on radio and television. That's what I've been doing the last few weeks until you called me out of nowhere. You see, mom? All I'm doing is playing up dissention between me and Hikari, and I'm doing it all for the two of us.”

 

“People will pay big money to see either of us coordinate wherever we may go. Why? Because human beings feed off of drama. It provides for them more nourishment than ten Thanksgiving dinners, but the catch is that none of these people will have had their fill after the first match, the fifth match or the fiftieth match, because I plan to pace things the way I feel they need to be paced."

 

"Okay, Zoey. Enough" my mother gestures by gritting their teeth. She then proceeded to heavily sigh and shake her head in what I believe to be disapproval of my plans.

 

"You've told me the truth, and I thank you for that. Now I have a few questions of my own." She pinches her nose for a second or two and starts with a round of interrogation of a different sort. "If you wanted to help Hikari along, why did you feel that the best way to do that was to start a rivalry?"

 

I think this is an easy question, so I have no problems answering it with the truth. "You know the old saying, mom? Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer. If I became friends with her and just helped her along with sage advice every now and then, it's only gonna help her temporarily. I want something that can unleash whatever is inside of the girl and get her to be her own force in coordinating, so I decided the best path of action was to become her enemy.”

 

“She doesn't need to do much to impress her friends, because they'll be satisfied knowing that Hikari tried her best. It's an entirely different thing altogether trying to impress your enemies, and she'll work her tail off to do that, and improve by leaps and bounds along the way. I made this rivalry and everything that will be a part of it for Hikari, and some for me."

 

"You mean that part where you talked about how people will want to buy and watch human drama if built up the right way" mom asks?

 

"That's right, mom. I didn't become a coordinator to become rich or wealthy or what have you, but if people want to share in our experiences together, why stop them from being a part of this grand experiment?"

 

"Experiment? Experiment!?!?" mom echoes.

 

I cringe somewhat upon hearing her reaction. "Maybe that was a poor choice of words, mom?" It was, because she is now coming towards me and pointing her finger in my face.

 

"I don't care what you do or what you say to try and... moralize what you're doing, Nozomi, but Hikari is not a fucking lab rat! She does not deserve to be treated like one, either! You're taking advantage of the emotions of people, and I don't give a damn how you slice it, that's wrong! That's especially wrong when you think that you can control people's thoughts and ideas! You're not God, Nozomi, so stop trying to play the part."

 

I knew that I pissed my mother off if I got her to curse, because she only does it when she is really mad. And she has switched back to using my real name. I have to interject myself back into this conversation. Now is the time. "But I'm not saying that I am in control of the way she thinks or feels, or the things she says! And besides, I already know that my plan to build the rivalry is a success."

 

"How so, Nozomi? How do you know that you have succeeded so far if you've only seen Hikari once since you're interview?"

 

Damn it! Mom's caught me in a lie-- again.

 

"Because..." I say on an impulse. "Because I met Hikari one more time before the end of the rookie challenge."

 

My mother has this very 'I knew it' look on her face now, almost as if she was waiting in the wings to catch me in a falsehood. She goes back to her seat and sits back down. "Please do explain, Nozomi" she says with a disturbing smile.

 

I was cornered, and decided to admit to the truth, before being caught in an even worse tangled web of lies and mistruths. Count it as yet another lesson to be learned in life; don't screw yourself up if you can help it.

 

"On the Friday of the rookie challenge," I restart, "I was going to take the whole day off, after I got frustrated seeing a picture of me in the local newspaper, and looking at articles that talked about how I was wrong doing what I did."

 

"You were. Wrong, that is." mom adds.

 

"May I finish my story? Please?" I ask, though I was somewhat rude to her. Rudeness breeds rudeness, however. She had been rude to me, but that didn't excuse me from being rude to her. My mother can at times be crude, and this is an instance where I suppose the apple does not fall that far from the tree.

 

"All right. You can finish your story. I'm sorry for interrupting you."

 

I bring my head down, but only for just a second before I continued. "That Friday, I decided to relax with Glameow and my other pokemon on the beach of the Sevii Islands. Those plans were put to a halt when... in reality; Hikari didn't calmly approach me and formulate the 'hair versus dress' stipulation. She screamed out a derogatory term while I was on the boardwalk, which caused me to turn my head and... Hikari punched me in the face and it led to a chain of events which knocked me out.”

 

“The blow... sent me to the hospital. I suffered a mild concussion and a broken nose, but was eventually told by the doctors that if I just took it easy for a week or two, I would be fine. That much I expected. What I didn't expect was to find Hikari there at the emergency room waiting to talk to me about the things I said about her on live radio.”

 

“We had a very heated discussion and I was afraid that she was going to beat the heck out of me on more than one occasion. In the midst of our argument, we came up with the basis of our stipulation, but... I must admit that Hikari really impressed me to the point that I was afraid I was losing control of my own master plan."

 

"The way that she talked about how she felt about me saying those things about her was great, and she had this 'refuse to lose' attitude down to a science. She was angry, no doubt, but the way she controlled her anger is the one instance which sets her apart from the time she came into my emergency room compared to the time that she left. After a few days, I came to the conclusion that the proximity of the time that I suffered a concussion to the time that Hikari and I had our talk made the possibility of delirium in my mind a very realistic one.”

 

“The fact that Hikari, a girl I thought was quite naive and quite honestly somewhat of a ditz could bring down my psyche and put me in place like she did was scary. I found out that she did not need my help to build her up, because she had this attitude in her the whole time. It just needed to be released, and I happened to be the person who did it. Now I'm done, mom."

 

Mom again is shaking her head in what I presume to be great disapproval in my actions as of late. "By releasing this... anger from Hikari, you might have just unleashed Pandora's Box. You already know that she won't take much more of your bull crap. Is this really all worth it in your mind?"

 

There's a question I've heard (and asked) many times before. "Yes, ma'am. I'm willing to risk it all, because I believe in Hikari, even if there are times that she doesn't believe in herself."

 

"Zoey?”

 

Praise Moses. Mom has gone back to using my nickname. Mom is now gathering her thoughts as she prepares to speak again. I've given my mother just about everything of importance and substance that I can give her as far as whatever she might have wanted to know. "Come here, dear." she lightly orates.

 

I make my way over to her upon hearing her command. She than proceeds to stand back up as the air between the two of us decreases in size. "Zoey, I'll just say this, and if there is anything else you'd like to say to me afterwards, that's your prerogative. I thank you for telling me the truth, but you know better than to lie like that.”

 

“I'm racking my brain trying to figure out why you would do this, and all I can think of is that you wanted to keep it all to yourself for fear that if you shared these secrets with anyone; they'd tell someone who would exploit its falsity. Right?" I silently nod to her.

 

"I can't... I can't say that I support this, but what I can say is that no matter what, so long as you, Hikari or anybody else doesn't get physically or emotionally hurt during this entire scenario or any other crazy schemes you do in your life, I will support you, Nozomi. Whatever you need please let me know. And please, dear, please I'm begging you, try to open up more. You can't go through life living like a hermit or an island unto yourself. Ever since Makoto died up until now, though I'll admit that Hikari is a special case, you haven't even tried to go out there and make a new friendship.”

 

“I realize it was very tragic, but it's been over five years! What is it that... you know what? I'll just say this; I may not love the things that you have done or the things you are doing right now or the stupid, idiotic and asinine things I know that you'll do in the future, but I love you Nozomi, and I only want what's best for you. What's best for you may or may not be what I want, and that's something I've come to learn over the years. Hell, if it were me, I would have just said to the girl 'Hey! My name is Nozomi Kobashi. As a kid, I really looked up to your mother, and I just want to know if you'd like to be friends?'”

 

“That's not complicated at all, Nozomi, and I didn't need to make an enemy to do it, either. There would have been a rivalry, but you don't need to base a relationship on hatred, especially with someone that-- you said so yourself you wanted to get to know better." Mom brings me closer by grabbing onto my shoulders and pulling me close.

 

"Look. What I'm trying to say is this. There will come times down this long road where you will be faced with many difficult decisions. It may seem easy for you to lie to somebody else about your present situation, your feelings, everything for that matter. But the worst person you can lie to isn't your parents, it isn't your best friend, it's not your doctor, or any spiritual advisor in the world.”

 

“Dear, you can say what you want to whomever you want, but please do me this favor; don't lie to yourself. You lie to yourself, and you could very well miss something important and special that will come into your life. You don't want to miss anything that could change your life for the better, now do you?"

 

"No. You're right” I say softly. “And if I'm more honest with myself, then I'll only naturally be more honest with others, including you, mom."

 

This statement by me puts a big smile on the face of my mom. "That's the spirit. Now give me a hug." I happily oblige. "I may not show my love like a, well... normal mom, but I want you to know that so long as I am here, you will always be loved. Do you understand?"

 

"I understand, and I'm glad. And besides, who the heck wants a normal mom anyway when I've got you?" I can honestly say that my mother and I have a relationship unlike any other mother and daughter in the whole of the world. Even though we may not show our love for each other all the time, we do understand each other, and when one hurts, the other hurts as well. A relationship is not just built on trust, but understanding and I'm fortunate to get to know and understand my mom better than I did before today.

 

We slowly let go of each other's embrace. "What time is it, Nozomi?" I look at my poketch and am surprised to see that it is about ten minutes until noon. I tell this to mom and she is quite surprised, as well. She then goes into overdrive preparing the filet mingon steaks for our dinner in a few hours or so. I stay in the living room, and check what is on the television to find some program to kill time beforehand.

 

Foregoing the annual reruns of classics like 'Miracle on 34th Street', 'It's a Wonderful Life', and a rerun of a charity game of soccer played back in the month of May, I finally stumble across what is a live pokemon contest in Floaroma Town. I do somewhat of a double take, as I didn't expect that many people to be a part of a contest during a holiday weekend and there were. I notice a face from one of my earlier contests and force myself to take a closer look.

 

"Wait a minute. It that... Kengo?" I speculate out loud. I ask myself this, because Kengo was the person I defeated in the finals to win my very first contest ribbon. He is another member of this rookie class of pokemon coordinators, much like Hikari and I. I can't remember seeing him at the rookie challenge, but I sincerely doubt that he made it, or chose to go. To describe Kengo, I'd say that he is a great guy who trains and cares for his pokemon such as Prinplup like no one else I've met while coordinating, and is the most humble and respectful of any male coordinator I've met, as well.

 

My only minor qualm about him is that often times; his attention is diverted from his goals. Even if it is only for that very brief moment, he loses sense of the main reason why he is a part of contests, and what his strategy is meant to display in a contest. That doesn't mean that I don't think he can succeed, I just believe that it's going to be very difficult for him to win and win often. I sit back, hoping to see who else is a part of this contest, but I hear a voice that didn't come from me or the television. Therefore, by process of elimination...

 

"Zoey? I think now is the best time for you to go and pay a visit to Dr. Yun before we sit down and eat." If hearing my mom's voice brings me chills at times, then hearing that cursed name makes me damn near sick to my stomach. I turn off the TV, knowing that there is no point in arguing with my mother concerning what are supposed to be required visits to his practice.

 

Doctor Yun has been my orthopedic specialist for the last four years. His sole purpose, along with being the supreme doctor of gloom and doom is to update me on the progressive condition of my right leg, which was severely injured when I was seven years old in a freak gymnastics accident.

 

Honestly, he is not that bad, but what makes him out to be 'gloom and doom' in my eyes is the fact that although my leg can be in the best condition imaginable, he always has some warning or caveat that I am to follow. For instance, prior to me leaving for my journey back in the month of March, he warned me to never attempt to exert myself for fear of injuring my leg again.

 

I promised him that I would not overexert myself, and though I have broken my promise about once or twice, I haven't experienced any wear and tear to my 'bad wheel'. I contend that I won't have any more problems because my leg is fully recovered, but mom insists that I make these appointments and if I don't, she will follow up with Dr. Yun's offices and force me to get my leg checked anyway.

 

So like I said, I make no arguments with my mother and head over to the local hospital to get checked out. The receptionists and the orderlies there know me so well, that all I have to do is show up and tell them what I need from the doctor, and I get it. Another advantage I have is that most of the people who work in this office have my mother as their lawyer or legal counsel. I've sat down and had dinner with just about all of them, and they have supported me on journey as well. Once the receptionist buzzed the doctor, it was only scant minutes before I hear a very cheerful voice coming from the office corridor.

 

"Well hello there, Nozomi. So how's our little firecracker coordinator doing this afternoon?" The doctor, despite his wackiness at times, is never one to break the line that comes between a doctor and his patients. That's clearly obvious when he brought up my now infamous interview just like anyone else that cares. Despite his feelings about it, which he never made clear one way or the other, he is the doctor who will stand by his oath and care for the sickly. I suppose that includes me, but I feel fine. If you are cynical, keep in mind that those are famous last words.

 

After getting some X-rays on my leg done, I am told to wait while they developed. After about 15 minutes or so, which I presumed were spent in his office handling some other projects or work, the doctor came back, hanging four pictures of my left leg. He then turns on a backlight and starts to talk about me and my present situation.

 

"These are the years where I am more legitimately concerned about your leg than at any other point in your life, Nozomi." My doctor tells me with a caring tone to his voice. "As you probably know through your mother and are personally finding out through experience, your body is going through many changes that will help you as you grow and mature into an adult."

 

Yun is of course talking about the dreaded 'P' word; puberty. I haven't seen what my mother tells me will be small but noticeable signs of these changes. I haven't noticed any increase in breast size, or hair in places that I did not expect to see, or the really odd thing that mom mentioned, menstruation, which the way she described it, you'd think it was a four letter word.

 

Anyhow, the only thing I notice that is in line with all the things she has told me concerning puberty is that I seem to go through more mood swings these days than in past years. Perhaps that's the reason why I thought I was losing control; it was the result of a mood swing, and I just had no idea how to handle the situations at hand.

 

"These changes could very well have an adverse affect on how your leg grows along with the rest of your body at such a rapid pace as it will. It still makes me cringe when I think about the shape your leg was in four years ago. From the middle of your ankle all the way down to your foot, you could have swung your limb just like a pendulum. I mean, you didn't just break your fibula and tibia, you tore just about every muscle, ligament and tendon in your lower leg, as well."

 

"Yeah." I punctuate. "I remember you saying at the time that the only thing uglier than the condition of my leg was the abstract art sculpture in your office. But in my sarcastic streak, I told you that at least the sculpture had an excuse." That gave the doctor an excuse to give me a hearty laugh.

 

"Well, like I was saying, Nozomi, I know that you're the type of person that goes out there every day and pushes herself beyond what is needed or expected. You've always been like that, wanting to walk almost immediately after having the major surgery. I'm just very concerned, not just as a doctor, but as a friend as well. We put rods, screws, pins, and steel apparatuses and plates just to keep that leg from falling apart at the seams because you wanted to walk before you physically could. I'm willing to be the farm on the fact that we put about half of an Erect-A-Set starter kit into your leg.”

 

“And that's how I earned my nicknames here, as well” I say, jogging the memory of Yun. “I was `The Bionic Girl', `The Two Million Dollar Girl'; I was also `The Machine' for a while, as well.”

 

“There is one nickname that you forgot” Yun says, now apparently remembering some items from our last visit nearly a year ago.

 

“Which one” I legitimately ask, not remembering another nickname that I was called in the past.

 

Yun then grabs my right leg and then brings it back down. “Lead legs, Nozomi. You were called lead legs.” I can't help but laugh. I was indeed known as lead legs, but if I recall correctly, I asked Dr. Yun to come up with something more creative, and the names I mentioned were a few that Yun and his assistants came up with.

 

“Like I said” Yun reminds, “you... have to know when to slow down, Nozomi, because only you can know the true shape of your leg. Don't feel like you have to put unneeded pressure on your leg if you can help it. Understand?"

 

"Yes, doctor. Thanks for your concern, but I promise you that nothing will go wrong with me. Am I done, sir?"

 

He flashes me a smile, just like he does with all of the patients that come into his practice and gives me the okay to leave. As I am about to leave the examiner's room, "Ahem." his voice cracks through the dry air of his large office. I turn around upon hearing this from the doctor, and in his hand were my favorites, even as a seven-year-old up to now; he's got Tootsie Pops, ten of them in all, and he tells me that they are mine. 'A little gift for my favorite patient,' he says. I smile widely at this present of his and thank the doctor before I leave with a hug. After leaving the office, I unwrap a cherry-flavored pop for the road.

 

The doctor may go through more flip-flops and jokes than a politician running for office, but there is no denying that he knows, loves, respects, and cares for his patients. Heck, like I said he's not that bad, but it'd be better if he just took my word, because the fact is my leg has not bothered me in almost a year and a half. Oh well. No sense in arguing with the doctor's sage advice to just be careful, but you could argue that that advice, a few x-rays and ten guilty pleasures of mine should not cost 500 dollars. Thank god my mom's a lawyer, because I think I need one. This is robbery.

 

A/N: Lots of stuff to cover here, so please pay attention! There will be a quiz afterwards! Just kidding!

 

Find out who wins the stipulation in the next chapter, and read the hilarity as the loser goes through the entire process of preparation for a pokemon contest on primetime television.

 

For the record, although she said `Praise Moses', Nozomi is NOT Jewish. This is not to say I have anything against the religion. If anything, she is a light form of skeptical agnosticism, which can be found in parts of previous chapters.

 

I forgot to mention in the end notes of chapter four that the character Alexis O'Connor will be a recurring character. As of this writing, her next appearance will be in chapter seven.

 

Doctor Yun is a recurring character, and so is Sebastian, but Yun will not been heard from again for a while.

 

If you go back to the end of chapter four, you'll find that Nozomi (Zoey) was about to go to the Floaroma Town contest before she got the call from her mother. Keep that in mind for this, and the next chapter.

 

Zoey mentioned in her fake story that she was practicing a routine at the rookie challenge in October with Misdreavus and Flareon. This is only half true, as she was actually doing this new routine after signing the contract to make the stipulation official in November.

 

Forgive me if there are some continuity errors, but keep in mind that Nozomi broke her right leg, and Hitomi tickled her left leg.

 

It didn't take long for me to decide that at 23,000 words, what would have been chapter five of six was just too long. Luckily, I found a point in the chapter that would evenly split chapter five, and what will be chapter six.

 

As always leave your constructive criticism and check my author's page for updates on these and future stories.