Shaman King Fan Fiction ❯ A Moment For Thought ❯ A thought From Ren ( Chapter 1 )

A thought from Ren

 

I see you in my dreams and I see you in my nightmares. You are my greatest hope yet you are my greatest fear. Is this what love is? A constant torment knowing I will never be near you, knowing I could never bring myself close without forcing you away.

 

No one knows what its like to be this way. He has defeated me, and I don't like to admit I'm at his mercy. I almost lost him; I gave my life for him. I would do it again and again just to know he's safe, I see you look my way, you look right through me. I don't want you to see so I put up a wall of anger. You retaliate but then you once again fall silent. Craving something to show I come up on your radar I hit you, push you and the only thing I receive is a painful glare. My pride broken, my heart in pieces. I storm off hoping that maybe you will follow, but you never do. Another dream you have shattered unknowingly. Why? What is stopping me from telling you?

Rejection!

Fear!

Pain!

 

All I can do is watch, be an observer to your grace and never know how you feel. I can only gaze upon your lips never to taste the sweetness they hold, the sweetness I lust for. I don't know why I am thinking of such things, al I can do is hope that this is a phase and I will be brave enough to reveal all. Not yet, not now, maybe not ever! All I can do is wait…

 

Tao Ren