Slayers Fan Fiction ❯ Slayers Melee ❯ Magic, Midol and Mopeds! ( Chapter 3 )

Chapter 3

Ok! It's chapter 3! Now the insanity really takes off! Please R&R, e-mail me if your really board! Also, I love reading reviews, both good and bad so...

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Magic, Midol and Mopeds!

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Lina sighed "So, when do we start?"

"We start when Fillia gets back." Rhia said tying Melyn to a tree. Poor Xellos couldn't take much more of her glomping. "She is out with Valguav, right?"

"That's who she was with when she left." Xellos reached into Melyn's bag and popped pills into his mouth.

"Why'd you do that?!" Melyn asked, a look of shock on her face.

"Kid, your a headache." Xellos drank from her water bottle. "It was either Tylenol of a stiff drink. Tylenol was the only thing on hand."

"That's not Tylenol..."

"I. B. Prophen then."

"Nope."

"Advil?" Xellos' face turned to one of worry

"Nope."

"What the hell is it then?!" He leapt into her face "What kind of meds are these?!"

"Well, you took two Midol." She smiled sweetly "You won't have cramps or any other symptoms of your--"

"Just shut up." He growled and walked away.

"Melyn!" Rhia walked over to her friend. "Do you have a spell book in your backpack?"

"I think so..." Melyn grabbed her backpack with her feet and pulled it to the tree. In one amazing act, she opened the back pack and dug around. All without the use of her hands, which were tied to the tree too. "This is easier if I was untied." She eyed Rhia

"Not a chance, I untie you and Xellos is in the emergency room." The Neko-jin huffed and continued to watch her friend work.

"Here!" Melyn pulled out a book with her feet. "This has a lot of spells!"

"Good! I put you in charge of finding a spell that brings the dead back to life!" She patted Melyn on the head and went back to Lina to discuss plans to bring down the evil, now overload, Be-a-weenie.

Melyn growled incoherent profanities under her breath as she flipped threw the book. "Hey Gourry! My buddy!" She smiled sweetly to the blond man. "Is there any chance I could get you to cut me loose?"

"Um...I think you're nice and all, but the kitty said she'd scratch my eyes out if I helped you down. I believe her, she and Lina are really close and I don't think it'll be smart on my part to make either of them mad. Sorry." He smiled sweetly "I will sing if it will make you feel better."

"Damn." Melyn cursed and went back to finding a spell.

"Hello...what's going on?" Fillia stared wide eyed at the scene she arrived at a few minutes later. The group grew by two from the last time she was there, only a few hours ago she left. Valguav stood behind her.

"Fillia!" Melyn's eyes filled with tears. "Your dating Val! What about Xellos?!" (Fillia & Xellos 4ever! ^^;)

"So what were you and Val doing in the bushes?" Rhia inquired

Suddenly, out of the bushes a little woman appeared! "How dare you change the ratings of this story and make it into a lemon!" The woman screeched. Yes! This was Miss. Manners! The super tidy, super polite person in which keeps things in too much order!

"Oh, no!" Rhia turned on heal and ran from the lady.

"Rhikat! You potty-mouth! I will wash it out!"

After a few minutes of running, Rhia grew tired and tripped over an uprooted root and crashed into the ground. Miss. Manners sat on Rhia's back and proceeded to wash the Neko-jin's mouth out with soap.

Then, as quickly as she appeared, Miss. Manners ran off into the wilderness to torture some other poor potty-mouth.

"I...I'm not dating either of them! I am a pure Dragon Maiden!" Fillia's clarified, establishing no more confusion over her romantic life to the entire Slayers cast. Still, her face flushed a deep crimson red.

"So...Val's free...?" Melyn asked, much hope in her voice

"Of course I'm free!" Val huffed "Women can be very obnoxio-oof!" He didn't have time to finish as Melyn glomped herself to his head.

Valguav's arms flailed, trying to free himself of the girl's death grasp to his head.

Rhia whipped out her digital camera and, once again brought personal profit before the health and well-being of other living beings. Of course, this picture would be a great addition to the scrapbook of adventures the two fans were going through.

Once again, Xellos collapsed to the ground, groaning in pain.

"Well, Xellos," Fillia stood over him. "With all the negative emotions coming from Val, you should be having a feast!"

"Those...negative...emotions...are...are...keeping me...conscious..."He clutched to Fillia's skirt and pulled himself up. "Far...to...happy..." He collapsed onto the Dragon, sending both of them to the ground.

Fillia's face turned to horror at the sight of a fainted Mazoku on top of her "Yuck!" She threw him off.

Rhia put her camera away, figuring Val could really go for air at this moment. (Of course this is after she took great black mail photo's of Fi and Xel). She gripped Melyn and ripped the otaku off of the Dragon-Demon's head, unfortunately, some of his light aqua hair also left, still in the clutches of Melyn.

"NOOO!!" Melyn cried, trying to break free of Rhia.

Val's eyes widened and he ran from Melyn.

"How did you break free? We tied you to a tree?"

"I found a spell that disintegrates rope! I used it when Miss. Manners showed up!" Melyn said proudly. She held up the book of spells. "I also found a spell that brings the dead back to life!"

Rhia could still taste Pine sol in her mouth. "Great! Let's go!" She watched Melyn "So...do you have a car in that bag-o-wonders?"

"It's a backpack, the bag-o-wonders is too small to hold a car." Melyn sighed "And people call me stupid, you don't even get perspectives" Rhia glared "But I do have this!" Melyn reached in her bag and pulled out a mo pad. "You can use this!"

"How will this hold everyone?"

"Well duh," Melyn laughed like it was obvious what to do. "I have the 'official transportation of the Slayers' universe!" Melyn reached in her bag once again and brought out a cart filled with hay.

"No car, but you do have that thing." Rhia yelled pointing to the cart.

"So..." Everyone sweat dropped as a cow fell from the sky and landed on top of Melyn.

"I 'got milk'!" Melyn swayed away as the Slayers cast climbed onto the cart full of hay. Rhia started up the moped.

"Get on!" Rhia yelled to the, still dazed and confused Melyn

"I have my own..." Melyn moaned as she grabbed her head, "I'll catch up..."

"We're going to the town Sylphiel is from...Whatever it's called."

"Ok...is that the town with the really big tree?"

"Yes Melyn, the town with the really big tree." Rhia sighed and started to drive off. The cart really didn't slow Rhia's vehicle down. The little motor bike had a lot of power.

Rhia continued to drive, with no sign of Melyn anywhere. She started to feel bad about leaving her friend behind. That was before she heard the engine rivet and saw a motorcycle shoot by.

"Melyn?!" Rhia screamed. Sure enough, it was Melyn. A boom box was strapped to the back and was playing Stephen Wolfe's 'Born to be Wild'.

"See! My own wheels!" Melyn said proudly when she pulled up to the side of Rhia's moped.

Rhia growled and the rest of the trip was silent, except for the boom box playing all the greatest hits from the sixties, seventies, and eighties.

They arrived at --Insert Sylphiel's town name here-- just before the sun went down. The group found an inn, ate a rather large dinner that was consumed in a short amount of time thanks to Melyn's appetite. Everyone took what they could before Melyn took her portion. Needless to say, her eating manners and habits put both Gourry and Lina to shame.

"Tomorrow we find Sylphiel and revive the cool dead people here." Rhia yawned later that night as she lay in bed

"The 'cool dead people?" Melyn asked, snuggling with her Xellos plushie.

"Well, the stupid, ugly, no one really cares about dead people are pointless." Rhia explained

"Oh, so were just reviving the people you remember from the series."

"Precisely! Now we're thinking on the same level!" She turned to the other bed, "No need to revive the whiny characters that died because of that, right Melyn...Melyn?"

The sounds of light snoring filled the air like a rusty dump truck. Melyn was fast asleep, either that or she was choking on her tongue. Rhia didn't care to figure this out.

The next morning the real work would begin. But for now, the Slayers cast slept, in a sense, and prayed that the structures would not buckle on account of Melyn's horrible sounds of death and last the night.

Ok! Once again, I do not own Slayers, others do...blah blah blah. I do not own Miss. Manners, someone else, unfortunately, owns her.

Please! Read chapter four (when I get my lazy butt in gear and post it)! Thank you if you've endured this much! I love you guys!