Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ Echo ❯ Chapter V ( Chapter 5 )

Chapter Five

A light came from the bottom crack of the door, reflecting off the floor and into her open eyes. She was half asleep by that time, coming alive again as she heard small clicks hit the floor outside, little white capsules rolling through the crack. Sitting up, she reached down, picking them up and examining them as some sort of medication. She saw more roll across the seams of the wooden floor, picking them up and setting them on the dresser. Something glass hit the floor and rolled, too big to fit through the crack but dark enough to block the light and cast a shadow. Walking over softly and kneeling down, she peered through and saw the label of the bottle which obviously held the rest of the capsules. She blinked slowly, that label familiar to her somehow, as if she or someone she knew long ago took those pills. If it was one thing she could remember, though, it was that these things in too big amounts weren't good for you. In fact, something in her mind told her that these things weren't good in the first place, that no one should take artificial relief for something that could be conquered over time. The pills were just hiding something that would eventually come back, and if you could not take on this pain without it then you would become a slave to it.

She knew who it was that took them after a moment of thought. It was her father, so long ago when she was a child. She remembered her father telling her that her mother hadn't made it to the planet, that it was just them with her grandmother. She remembered staring up at him when he was eating breakfast and dinner, how he would take his white pills and smile at her, patting her head. He would say that its what adults took when they were sad, something children should never have, but as she grew older she could see past that lie. Those pills were something no one should have to take, and when he past away she finally confronted her grandmother about it. She told her the same thing she had thought for years, that those who took it were happy by erasing those thoughts for a time but were enslaved to it as their condition only got worse. She always wondered what her father was feeling right before he died, whether he was at least in temporary happiness or in his lowest of lows.

This was not something she wanted anyone, not even Legato, to feel. She didn't want to have someone suffer like her father did, to only have their pain get worse and worse with every use and every untreated day. For some reason, after the few words they exchanged over the weeks, something began chewing at her heart. Guilt, in a word, could have been the reason, but whatever it was it only got worse with every smile she saw, every empathic moment she shared. She couldn't just let him do this, to be there and watch him kill himself from the inside out. So, on a whim, she did the only thing she could think of doing. She snatched what pills she could from out of the bottle and on the floor, going to the dresser, taking what she had collected before, and walking into the bathroom. Tossing them into the toilet, she pulled the handle without a second deliberation, blinking a moment later in realizing what she had just done.

She had saved him from his slavery, yes, but it was most likely he would have her head for this. Those pills are what also kept in his anger towards his pain, and if he had no prior treatment she could only imagine how much damage his nightmares had caused him. So she sat in the dark, her breathing becoming heavy in hoping he would not come in to strangle her for her deeds, and if he did she prayed he would not find her sitting there.

Holding her breath, she could hear footsteps coming from the other room and into hers with the creak of the door, shutting her eyes tight as she could see the light from a lantern coming through the bathroom entrance. She tensed up, huddling in the corner the best she could before finally the footsteps came to a stop. A hand fell upon her shoulder, Katyenka looking up only to find Legato smiling wide, in a happy way no less.

"Found you," he said with a laugh, his eyes seemingly in a daze as he stood up straight again and jogged out.

She sat there for a moment to let her heart slow, standing up progressively as she guided herself out with a hand on the wall for support. The light from the outer room filled her eyes as she laid gaze on it for the first time. It wasn't anything special; just a table with two chairs and an iron stove in the back corner with a sink next to it. What interested her the most, however, was the screen door that had no lock and that lead to the outside world. She eyed that first and then Legato, sitting in one of the chairs with his head in his hands, appearing different from what he had shown just a moment ago.

"My pills...I saw them roll into your room. What did you do with them?" he questioned, Katyenka clasping her hands in front of her as she stared at the floor.

"I...flushed them..." she replied, Legato beginning to chuckle.

"And what gave you this idea?"

"I...I've seen it happen before. Those pills--they enslave you, make you think you're getting better but you're really only getting worse."

"And what? You were concerned about my health? My health?" he spat, gazing up at her.

"No! Well, I mean...I saw my father get like that and I just don't want to see it again. That's all."

He paused for a moment, tapping his fingers on the table as he leaned back. "Well, it doesn't really matter anymore. They stopped working days ago. My dreams are now occurring while I'm awake."

"You mean like hallucinations?" she asked.

"Worse...They feel so real, I actually believe they're happening..." He sighed deep in his throat, scratching the top of his head as he waved his hand. "Come sit down. It's not like either of us are going to get any sleep."

She hesitated for a moment, but then walked over, taking a seat across from him while eyeing the door briefly. There were only a few feet keeping her from escaping, and in time she knew she would have her chance.

"So tell me, who gave you the right to get rid of the medication?" he grinned, an offended look smearing across her face.

"No one. It's just that you should face your problems without help from a drug that can make you dependant on it, that can kill you if you refuse to take it."

"And you would know of problems that bad," he retorted, standing up and beginning to walk over to the stove where a tea kettle was starting to whistle.

She narrowed her eyes. "Yes, in fact, I do have problems that bad. But that's of no importance to you, apparently, so it isn't something you should care about."

He laughed, nodding his head as he lifted the kettle off the stove and over to the sink. "Yes, it isn't, is...it..." His eyes glazed over once more, dropping the kettle just before it reached the sink.

Katyenka jumped up in surprise, watching as the boiling water splashed across the floor and trickled through the cracks as Legato stepped over it without even seeming to be fazed by it. Her anger was washed over by question as he smiled at her gently, standing back as he approached.

"What?" she asked timidly, but it wasn't what he heard or saw.

'What?' he heard ringing through his mind with a laughing voice, the woman with a face he could not see standing there in place of Katyenka. The surroundings were different, with a smaller room and a weaved hammock stringed in the corner, but the table and chairs were still there in a blur to him. The woman's giggle continued while Katyenka looked at him in horror as he took her hand and put his other on her waist.

'Legato, cut it out!' the woman would laugh, beginning to twirl with him as they began to dance while Legato hummed the music. Katyenka couldn't escape his grip and had to go along as he chuckled and said he was sorry every time he stepped on her feet. He stared down to try and watch what he was doing, seeing scarred bare feet from Katyenka's cheap tattered shoes and hearing laughter from her worried noises in her throat.

Although he could not see her face, he didn't seem to realize what he was experiencing was just a dream. That or he just didn't care, wanting that feeling of happiness to never end. As he gazed up into the face he could not see, Katyenka looked into his eyes and saw something. It was something she saw in a couple's eyes as they walked with each other down the street, something seen in children's eyes towards their family, something that no amount of money and no amount of drugs could grant. It was that sometime people would describe as being truly in love and being loved in return, and it was something that was hard to take away from someone, even in death.

"What is your mind showing you now?" she whispered, her soul turning soft. "You see her, the woman without a face, don't you...? She died...didn't she?"

Legato's beat slowed, the woman in his mind being drawn close and his reach pulling her towards him, Katyenka no longer resisting him and playing the part like the woman in his head. Her eyes began to fill with tears in the thought of her father's death, how in so many ways were they the same. The only difference was she could at least remember her father, but Legato...Legato didn't have any memories of his love. He was alone, with only these simple dreams to remind him of the life he once had. No wonder he kidnapped her to get his memories back; she didn't know how she could go on with knowing she at least had something once but not knowing what it was.

"I'm sorry...Legato..." she spoke as he put his head against hers, humming the ending.

The moment lingered for the longest time, Legato's one amber eye that was exposed faded into bliss as he opened his mouth to say something more, but all that came was a choking sound. He stood back, grabbing his chest as he rasped for breath. Katyenka stared in confusion, wondering if that was part of his dream as well as he fell back, falling back and hitting his head against the stove. In that instant Katyenka looked back to the door, finding it the perfect time to escape. He held out a hand as she ran for it, stopping as he spoke.

"Wait...please...don't go..."

'I'm going to go get help, Legato. I'll be right back, okay?' the woman reassured to him as she ran out, but Katyenka said no such thing, opening the screen door and running out without another glance back. In this Legato gained a double vision of sorts, seeing both the woman with no face and Katyenka run outside through two different doors, Legato realizing what had just happened.

Katyenka could hear him scream in agony and in anger, running as fast as she could to wherever she could without looking back. She ran out of an alley the house was situated in, her feet coming to a sudden halt as she gasped, shaking her head in disbelief.

"No...This is..." she began, staring up at the broken buildings and rubble reflecting the moonlight. She could picture everything about this place, from when she was a child to when she came back for the last time. This street lead to her father's work a few blocks down, where it used to be lined with restaurants and bars for those who just arrived in town. She could smell the sweet sent of flowers that had been artificially grown and put out for sale. She could hear the clacking of wooden marionettes a merchant sold a few shops down on the street. It was all coming back to her now...All of it. That included the time when she came back, when she stared up in that very same spot and cried as they medical staff from five different towns did the clean up of the corpses lying everywhere. That included her searching through her father's office only to find half of him lying underneath a slab of stone...

Her throat tightened, her breathing becoming erratic as she grabbed her head and shook it violently as she ran, screaming for the images to leave her. In the silence of the night people for more than a mile could probably hear her, so it was no surprise when she ran into someone and fell back. She gazed up with watery eyes, seeing three scrubby men standing over her with grins on their faces.

"Hey sweet thing, what's a pretty girl like you doing out so late, huh?" one of them said, reaching down and picking her up by the wrist.

She screamed and clawed the man's hand with what nails she had, getting free and running in the other direction. The other two ran after her as the third went around to cut her off, eventually making her run down a dead end. She put her back against the brick wall, covering her face with her arms as she slid to the ground. It seemed to ironic that the moment she escaped from one problem, she immediately found herself in another, her mind balancing thinly on a sanity wire that was bound to snap at any time. She had tried so hard to forget about July only to find that she was standing in the thick of it, remembering all that brought her pain and sorrow. Her subconscious laughed at her stupidity, asking why she hadn't saved one, just one of those pills for herself.

As the man reached down once more, the three of them snickered, commenting on how much 'fun' it would be. But the lead man stopped, suddenly being forced forward and cracking his forehead into the brick, blood beginning to flow down. The man got up slowly to find that the other two were already trembling in their boots, stumbling forward to speak with him. She looked past them all to find Legato standing there, his eyes back to the way they had been from the start--cold and hateful.

"I warned you not to come back but like the insignificant parasites you are you couldn't help but disobey, could you?" Legato said spitefully but in a monotonic voice.

"Ah, c'mon, Legato, we just haven't left yet is all," he turned back to Katyenka who continued to quiver in fear and in loosing her mind. "We just wanted to get one last drop of honey before we flew this beehive."

He reached for her again, but this time he was forced up straight, his arms suddenly being lifted and pulled back farther than humanly possibly. In this his skin began to tear, blood spraying out at Katyenka as his bones cracked and began twisting at every joint in ways that it shouldn't have. Legato's eyes were narrow with his hand raised to him, blinking slowly.

"Wrong answer," he breathed, the other two men fearing for their lives as he continued. "Consider yourselves fired. If I ever catch you in this town again so be it your fate will be much worse than what he has suffered here tonight." He dropped his hand and the man fell to the ground, shouting as he suffered more than he probably would for the rest of his life. The other two helped him up and ran out as quick as they could, Legato eyeing them down to make sure they were out of his sight for good.

But he turned back with Katyenka's shrilling scream, watching as she began mutilating herself. She tried wiping the blood on her arms away and even when there was none there she scraped until her arms became beat red. She shouted like she was mad, as if something were tearing her apart from the inside as she tore at her skirt and sleeves and threw them as far as she could. When she felt like she could do no more, she continued scratching at her arms, legs, and face, curling up tightly in terror. He walked over to her slowly, kneeling down and putting a hand on her forehead to see what was wrong with her. In that blinding instant, as those images past of the corpses of July, finding her own father's body, watching people suffer and die even in her own hometown with her hands soaked in so much blood, he finally understood. He knew what she meant about her heart mending, about how she, too, had 'problems that bad'. It was a mystery as to why he hadn't seen these things before, but the only thing that matter was that he knew them now.

Taking her by the shoulders and under her knees, he carried her back to the house, trying to keep her from tearing her skin off. Her eyes were distant then, in her own nightmarish world that was her mind. All he could do was try to get her to stop, taking her back into the bathroom and running the water in the bathtub for a few minutes. He didn't know how to be kind, how to give her comfort and to snap out of her trance-like state. Clasping her hands together was all he could think of to keep from clawing herself, holding her head up and trying to keep her awake. When the tub was filled enough, he set her in, the water turning red as the blood seeped off her skin. She calmed at that moment, her eyes rolling back as her breathing became normal again. He could see that her dress was stained badly enough that it would never come clean, so he stood in knowing she would need a new change of clothes. Walking out, he return a minute later with an extra pair of pants and a shirt that had dust collecting on them, setting them down on the floor as he kneeled back down next to her. Her eyelids came open little by little until they were tired slits, staring in front of her as she gave off a sense of peacefulness.

"Is anyone there?" she asked quietly.

"Yes, I am here, Katyenka Buskus," he replied, surprised a bit that she wasn't affected by the fact that she ended up back where she started from.

"What happened...?"

"You were attacked and I found you just before you were hurt. You...were in shock and so I brought you back here."

She smiled, reaching out of the side to find a hand. He took it with his right without thought, a hesitation drifting between them to speak as she tilted her head.

"These hands...are those of a person who has worked hard his whole life..." she struggled for breath slightly, her eyes becoming wide.

Legato shut his eyes, seeing what she saw, knowing what she knew at that very moment. For some reason everything was in a blur to him and yet he could hear laughter, becoming dizzy as it became louder in his head. Soon enough he was forced to open his eyes before he made any sense of it, find that Katyenka was staring at him.

"I saw it...I saw my life...what I had forgotten long ago..." she said, slipping her hand away and sitting up straight. "I thought...that there had been nothing...But to what I remembered I had a life after my grandmother died. I don't know what it was...but I know that by feeling I at least had some days of happiness before I awoke in a completely different town. I thought all that had been before was a dream...But it wasn't...and those images prove it! You saw it, didn't you?"

"If you're talking about a few blurred images-"

"No, no! It was clear! I could see myself smiling, standing out in the sunshine and laughing, younger than when I awoke as but older than when I thought my life ended...I can't explain it, I can't understand what ended it, but I know it happened once..."

He got up, walking over and standing in the doorway. "I knew you had a gap in your past, where the last of your family died to when you awoke in the hospital of a strange town. This is where you met those travelers who knew of Vash. I thought that would be all that was important, but I didn't expect that gap to be so important to you. Though, I am glad you know at least some time in your life, even if it was for a short part, was a happy time..." His figure remained stern but she could see he held a heavy heart with those words. "There are clothes on the floor there for you. If you need anything I will be outside." In this he walked out and shut the door, this time using his hand instead of his powers.

The door to the bathroom opened with Katyenka rubbing her arms to keep from shivering minutes later. She tried not to show that she was cold, but it was hard not to be when she was still wet. Legato had just walked in with a bundle of blankets, seeing her standing there with a chattering jaw and a blushing red face of embarrassment. The fact was she felt like a fool wearing such a baggy shirt and pants that were so big that the belt around her waist at its tightest setting needed the assistance of one of her hands. He could see her wet undershirt strap as she clenched her collar, trying be as modest as she could but feeling like she should just back away into the bathroom again. Standing with a thick, dark green blanket in hand, he put it over her shoulders before she crept back into the next room, letting her clasp both ends. He rubbed her arms for warmth, her teeth slowly stopping their chattering as he spoke.

"I'm sorry I could not find you any other clothes. Those were the only ones around, although I know they were a bit dusty."

"No, they're fine. Thank you, Legato," she replied.

"I'll find you a different belt tomorrow. But for now that will have to do." He stood back, going to the door. She stopped him, though, by asking him something he wasn't quite expecting.
"Legato...Can I ask you something...?"

"Yes? What is it?"

"I remember you saying that you hated humans when you worked for Knives, but with that look I saw a while ago...as you stood behind those men...Tell me, do you still hate them? Do you hate your own kind?"

He hesitated to answer. Looking back over his shoulder, he said the most truthful thing he could at the time. "Something happened to make me hate them so, even before Millions Knives stole my memories, and I have never forgiven them. So yes, I still hate them, with a bitter distain. In fact, I am ashamed to be compared to them."

"You know, not all are like those you came to disgust," she replied quietly.

"Yes...But it is very hard to trust, especially when you don't know if they'll do it again."

"But what did they do?"

He did not reply for a time, but stood in the doorway, staring out in thought. "Get some sleep," he said. "Vash the Stampede and Millions Knives will be here soon."

"Wait!" she yelled, bringing him to a halt again.

"Yes?"

"I want to help you as much as I can. I...I won't try to escape again. Promise..."

He grinned, nodding his head. "I know. But thank you anyways."

She smiled as he walked out and shut the door behind him, sitting down on the bed. Looking up and out the window in seeing the sun rising, she could remember the first time she had looked out that window, how she was scared out of her mind and wondered if she was ever going to get out of there. At that moment, she wasn't really scared anymore and not really concerned on when she would leave. From the once cold blooded killer she saw him as, he had changed into a kinder soul, one that only wanted to find the truth as any human being would have. She only hoped it would go well when he did get his memories back, that he would find satisfaction and happiness in knowing the things he missed the most.