Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ As If! ❯ Dungeon Dice Monsters, Pt. 4 ( Chapter 47 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

*Author's Note: Well, I guess this is the last chapter, guys! I am, however, writing a narrative YGO fic, so check out my website or http://www.fanfiction.net/~darkgatomon for that if you're interested in reading more of my writing. Of course, it's not like As If! will necessarily be down forever. There's a rather ugly hole in the chapter list for Duelist Kingdom, don't you think? So if you want to be notified if I ever get around to writing those, just give me your email address and I'll drop you a line.

Again, this chapter was mostly written by Sasha. In fact, all scenes that weren't marked as being written by me (except those at the very end) were written by her, so please give her all the credit! Her email address is darksaiyajin_26@hotmail.com if you want to tell her what you think.

Well, that's it! Thank you guys for all your support, and I hope you like this chapter! Ja ne!*

*Scene: After a surprisingly quick recap, Yami attempts to continue his winning... er, losing... er, clever streak, and Deeg starts off the chapter herself.*

Yami: Looks like I've rolled a Movement Crest with a double Movement Bonus, Duke! I'll use it to position my Knight of Twin Swords between your monsters and my Heart Points.

Duke: Sorry, Yugi, but it doesn't work like that! The times-two bonus doubles your monsters' speed, not their endurance!

Yami: So... it means they could move during your turn to defend me?

Duke: ...oh, you're right. That does almost make sense. Damn it.

*Scene: Duke tosses his green dice and red die up and down. Also by DG, who has been watching too many political debates recently.*

Duke: Nice try, Yugi, but none of your monsters can withstand the force of Orgoth the Relentless!

Yami: Well, obviously. It will still slow them down to have to attack, however.

Duke: Ha! Trying to buy a little time, Yugi?

Yami: Yes.

Duke: *blinks*

Cheerleaders: ...

Fangirls: ...?

Yami: What? Must I give a long rant every time?

Joey: Well, no, it's just...

Téa: You always do.

Tristan: Yeah.

*Yami sweatdrops*

*Scene: Orgoth walks to the Warp Vortex.*

Duke: Orgoth! Jump into the Warp Vortex!

Orgoth: Say my entire name.

Duke: *startled* Excuse me?

Orgoth: You said my entire name every time you referred to me. Say it again.

Duke: Fine! Orgoth the Relentless, jump into the Vortex!

*Orgoth giggles and jumps in*

Yami: Am I the only one who found that disturbing?

*Scene: In a flash of purple light, Orgoth the Relentless appears on Yami's side. By DarkGatomon.*

Duke: You know how it works Yugi. With Vortex, he instantly warpsto your side of the field!

Yami: Thus, I suppose, the name...

*Scene: Duke really has the funniest way of speaking. Same place, this time by Sasha.*

Duke: You know how it works Yugi. With Vortex, he instantly warps to your side of the field!

Yami: Why do you feel the need to tell me this? I know this already because I've done this before, and taken out two of your Heart Points!

Duke: Well, I damn well get to brag about using the stupid thing, too, so shut your trap!

Yami: *startled* All right, all right, I was just pointing it out.

*Scene: Yami "kindly points out" that he has one more Heart Point then Duke, then quickly rolls and moves before Devlin can retort. Written by Deeg, who is feeling creative today.*

Yami: Using the Movement Crests, I'll build a wall around my Heart Points. First, I'll move Thunderball into position, then Mighty Mage, and finally Knight of Twin Swords.

Duke: How sad! The so-called "King of Games" is in a desperate retreat. You coward!

Téa: Let me guess -- he's one of those equal-opportunity employers in chess, too, isn't he?

*Scene: Duke rants about his Crests a lot.*

Duke: I told you Orgoth was relentless. Now witness his strength up close!

Yami: No thanks, I've seen it over there and I'm quite happy not to see it again.

*Scene: Same.*

Duke: I told you Orgoth was relentless...

Yami: Many, many times, if I may recall. May I also plead that you come up with better names?

*Scene: Thunderball go kaboom!*

Duke: *smirks* It's tough to watch, eh Yugi?

Yami: If you're trying to act Canadian just so I don't come over there and punch your teeth out, it's failing horribly.

*Duke sweatdrops*

*Scene: At least Tristan can count.*

Tristan: Just two more monsters left! Duke's taking out Yugi's defenses one by one!

Téa: I know! But Yugi's been in tough spots before, and he's always come through. It's the power of the Puzzle, remember? Unbeatable luck in games!

Joey: *sweatdrops* If you ask me, I think he'd better wish for it to activate its powers!

*Scene: Grandpa cheers, because of course Yami can hear him -- he's special.*

Grandpa: You hang in there, Yugi! Just like Duel Monsters, the game's not over 'til the final move is made!

Yami: *mentally* As much as I am to respect you for being an elder and Yugi's grandfather, please do not state such obvious advice in an attempt to appear helpful.

Grandpa: *mutters* Yugi never mentioned that the spirit of the Puzzle was such a prick...

Yami: *growling* And while I must still respect you...

*Scene: Grandpa suddenly morphs into Yami.*

Duke: There's no way a hack like you could have beaten the great Pegasus. Now I'm going to expose you as the fraud you really are!

Yami: Unless you have photographs of this accusation I fail to be intimidated by you, clown boy. *folds his arms*

*Scene: You can tell Duke struck a nerve because Yami suddenly stopped referring to him as "Duke." By Deeg.*

Yami: Don't write that victory speech just yet, Devlin! This game's not over!

Duke: Huh! You think I ever go before my adoring fans without a beautifully crafted speech ready? It would be an insult to their sensibilities!

*Scene: Mighty Mage doesn't really look very mighty.*

Yami: Mighty Mage, Lightning Staff Attack!

Duke: No worries, I can weaken your magic attack with one Defense Crest! *holds up the red die, which apparently hadn't been sucked into the board* Orgoth the Relentless, activate Defense!

*Mighty Mage's attack deflects off of Orgoth's armor and ends up hitting Yami*

Yami: *twitching* What is with people's obsessions about having the attacks be real?

*Scene: Orgoth now has 20 HP left.*

Yami: Oh, no! Orgoth withstood the force of Mighty Mage's attack!

Duke: That's right, Yugi. Orgoth only took 10 Damage Points, dropping his Hit Points to 20.

Yami: Why do you assume your opponents are as stupid as Joey?

Joey: HEY!

Yugi: *mentally* Be nice, Joey's my friend!

Yami: *thinking* Be that as it may, he's not mine.

*Scene: Duke has Christmas dice!*

Duke: Advance one space, Orgoth the Relentless!

Téa: *grinding teeth* Why you have to say that all the time?

Tristan: Because he delights in sounding like an idiot?

*Scene: Watch those Magic Crests fly into Orgoth!*

Yami: Even you should know it takes more than strength to win, Devlin! Without strategy, power's just an empty threat!

Duke: Is that so? Well, pardon me if I keep crushing your monsters anyway...

*Scene: Orgoth uses his new "Super Diamond Blade Strike," and strangely peppy music starts playing on a radio somewhere.*

Duke: *chuckles* Looks like your beginner's luck has finally given out, Yugi!

Yami: You're mistaken, my Puzzle grants me eternal luck. My problem is that you're too sure of yourself to give in to my psychological attacks. *shakes head and mutters* Mind-readers and game-inventors, they're all the same... Smug sons of bitches...

*Duke sweatdrops*

*Scene: Why does he always pick the end of the duel to doubt himself? Is he really such a drama-queen? Scene by DarkGatomon.*

Yugi: *thinking* Poor Joey... I promised to get him out of that suit. Now I'm about to let my best friend down!

Yami: *mentally* Why do I get the feeling that's not about me and my soon-to-be inability to play Duel Monsters and, you know, save the world?

Yugi: *sweatdrops* Well, I don't know why that would be.

*Scene: It turns out that the three fangirls don't think they can take a guy in a dogsuit, and so let Joey rant. Also by DG.*

Joey: This is no time to be humble, buddy! You won the championship because you were the best gamer on the island -- better than Weevil, better than Mako, even better than me and Mai!

Tristan: And better than Kaiba...

Téa: Better than Mokuba...

Tristan: Better than Panik...

Téa: Better than that kid with the yellow-striped shirt...

Tristan: ...probably...

Joey: *sweatdropping and shouting* Alright, already!!

*Scene: Tristan attempts to make up for his original lame comeback to Joey's speech, while DG has some fun writing.*

Tristan: Inspiring speech, Joey! No-one can accuse you of rolling over and playing dead!

*Joey falls over*

Téa: Honorably sticking by the rules, however...

Joey: Hey, watch it!! I might not be supposed to talk, but dogs are still allowed to attack!

*Scene: DG says: I'm still admiring the phrase "Duke of Dork."*

Yami: You're absolutely right, Joey. I can never forget what made me Duel Monsters champion in the first place: believing in the Heart of the Cards.

Téa: Yeesh, I should hope not! You only say it every five minutes!

*Scene: Yami praises his dice -- they'll appreciate it.*

Yami: I advise you to keep an eye on your last Heart Point, Duke, because I'm coming after it!

Duke: No! *hugs it protectively with the powers of being illogical and glares at Yami*

*Scene: Duke's not impressed.*

Duke: Quit stalling, Yugi. I've got a game to win.

Yami: Or to lose!

Duke: You mean you have a game to lose.

Yami: No, you.

Duke: You!

Yami: YOU!

Both: YOU!

Yami: JINX!

Tristan: *dot-eyed* Whoa. How'd you know about such a modern kid thing?

Yami: *sighs* Sometimes it pays to have a childish aibou.

*Scene: Alas, Duke using a Defense Crest cuts down Yami's six-Attack-Crest strategy.*

Yami: I can't believe it!! Orgoth stopped all six of the Knight of Twin Swords's Slash Attacks!

Duke: *sighs and puts a hand to his head in disdain* He has to state the obvious?

Tristan: *distressed* And with so many words?

*Scene: Duke and Yami glare at each other via the split screen.*

Duke: And now you see just why they call Orgoth "the Relentless!"

Téa: Didn't you already say that?

Duke: *caught* I ... uh ...

Yami: *snidely* Can't think of anything more original, Devlin?


*Scene: Orgoth prepares to slay the Knight of Twin Swords.*

Yami: My Knight is doomed! There's nothing I can do to protect him anymore.

Knight of Twin Swords: If I weren't so busy about to be killed, I'd go up there and slash your head off.

*Scene: Yami hangs his head dejectedly.*

Duke: I'm only one move away from breaking your heart!

Yami: When have I ever expressed my feelings for you that way?

Duke: Argh, don't flatter yourself.

*Scene: When Yami's in too tight a spot to think, DG notices, he just keeps repeating this...*

Yami: It's easy to give up. To give in when things get tough. But that's not the way to win.

Duke: *twitching* DUH!!!

Yami: ...huh? What was I saying? I wasn't paying attention...

Duke: *anime fall*

*Scene: Duke appears to be listening while Yami speaks about believing in yourself.*

Yami: You know a lot about this game, Duke, but you've got a lot to learn about the people you play!

Duke: Not really. I did a full background check on you before I challenged Dog Boy over there. I know all about you and your Puzzle.

Yami: You really know how to kill a moment, don't you?

*Scene: DarkGatomon muses, is "the people you play" a reference to Dungeon Dice Monsters's origin as a Role-Playing Game?*

Yami: Maybe by the time this match is over, you'll have learned more than just a new Dungeon Dice rule.

Duke: *laughing* A new Dungeon Dice Monsters rule? Yugi, I made this game!

Yami: Exactly. So anything you learn would be more important than a new rule.

Duke: Are you kidding? Yugi, if this game is adding rules into itself, then I think that'd be way more important than anything you could tell me!

Yami: ...you're right, that would be pretty impressive, wouldn't it?

*Scene: Orgoth takes away Yami's heart...point.*

Téa: It's okay, Yugi. You still have one Heart Point left!

Yami: *sarcastically* Why, thanks for telling me, Téa. If you hadn't given that brilliant observation I never would have known it.

Téa: Geez, there's no need to be bitchy...

Yami: Isn't there?

*Scene: Yami really wants to summon a monster, but alas...*

Duke: You don't have any room to dimension the dice!

Yami: Then come here and I'll shove it down your throat, if that is what you wish.

*Scene: He wishes for that one monster to help him, do you know who it is?*

Yami: *thinking* I know there's still one monster that can help me win. I just have to believe and call on it right now! *summons that monster*

Kuriboh: *shows up on the field*

Yami: ¬_¬ The irony is killing me.

*Scene: DG always thinks this bit is a riot. Rolly polly, dicey glowy...*

Yami: There's more than one way to dimension the dice, Duke Devlin. You just have to believe.

Duke: Don't tell me how to play my game!

Yami: I'll let the dice tell you.

Dice: I can't believe you never tried making us out of paper!

*Scene: Yami defiantly tells Duke he can dimension his spiffy Level-4 dice another way.*

Duke: Don't tell me how to play my game!

Yami: Why not? I told Pegasus how to play his.

Duke: Don't bring him into this!

Yami: Why not? You always do.

Duke: Alright, you're really getting on my nerves.

*Scene: Duke's really bad at faking it. Scene by DG.*

Duke: *shocked* No! It's falling perfectly into alignment! You've completed the summoning!!

Joey: Which one of us is surprised here?

Téa: Um... me? If he didn't think you could dimension the dice that way, why did he program it into the computer?

Duke: *sweating* Uh, well, that's easily explained. Um... you see... well, it's because...

Tristan: Ooh, can anyone say, "cheater?"

*Scene: Yami calls on his monster, and you know which one.*

Yami: I summon the Dark Magician!!

Duke: The Dark Magician? I didn't program him into my game!

Yami: *stops* You didn't?

Duke: No!

Yami: Uhh... oh, well, that's um... inconvenient...

*Scene: No, no, of course he's there. By DG.*

Yami: The Dark Magician has never failed me, Duke! All I had to do was trust my dice, and sure enough, he has appeared!

Dark Magician: *looks around and about* Hey... I'm far smaller than usual! *glares at Yami* Don't tell me you offended Kaiba, and now I'm back to being limited to tabletop games.

Yami: *sweatdropping and waving his hands placatingly* No, no! It's just temporary, I swear!

*Scene: The Dark Magician defeats Orgoth the Relentless.*

Joey: Hang that from your ear and dangle it, Dukey-boy!

*A/N: Okay, there's nothing I can do to beat that.*

*Scene: Camp Yami rejoices.*

Duke: *thinking* Keep smiling Yugi! It'll make it that much sweeter when I take out your last Heart Point! And I know the perfect way to do it!

Yami: *mentally* Forgive me for intruding, but didn't you say Orgoth was your way to win? And I defeated your undefeatable monster?

Duke: I'm trying to throw out a last ditch effort here. Leave me alone!

*Scene: Dukey moves the Dark Assailant who merrily bounds ahead onto the chest.*

Duke: Remember when I told you about Item Summoning, Yugi?

*Yami has a flashback to when the box first appeared*

Duke: The time has come! Dark Assailant, open the treasure chest!

DA: *opens the treasure chest to reveal that it's filled with black dice*

Yami: I fail to see how those were going to help now.

Duke: Well, at the time it seemed like it was a good idea.

Yami: Doesn't everything?

*Scene: The chest opens with a lot of smoke -- someone is going to get lung cancer here.*

Yami: *thinking* He's starting the Summoning! What could it be?

Chest: *opens to reveal Exodia*

Yami: Two things: 1) Oh, crap. 2) How the hell did he fit in that box?

Tristan: Uh... magic?

*Scene: Okay, it's really the Monster Cannon.*

Duke: Say hello to the Monster Cannon!

Tristan: Monster Cannon?

Yami: Hello!

Monster Cannon: *sniffs happily* Finally, someone is showing me some respect! Not like Mr. Dimension the Dice up there.

Duke: *blinks* ... okay, who's been messing around with my programming?

*Kaiba smirks from his master computer in Kaiba Corp.*

*Scene: Back to Téa and Tristan, who haven't been getting enough airtime.*

Téa: What's that thing do?

Tristan: Téa, really, you need to ask? You actually have to ask?

Téa: *frowns* It's what the script told me to say. *slams fist down* It's a conspiracy! *thwacks Tristan*

Tristan: I think it's a conspiracy how much you tend to make me fall into a dizzy heap. *gets kicked by her pointy boot* Ow!

*Scene: Duke explains what the Monster Cannon does.*

Duke: What's it do? It takes down Yugi's Dark Magician!

Dark Magician: Why doesn't anyone talk to me? Honestly, I'm the one being targeted, not my Master. *sighs* They know my name, but they don't know me.

Yami: *leans over his display* Tell you what, Dark Magician, I'll break the rules and let you attack Duke. It'll help the both of us.

Dark Magician: Sounds like a plan.

Duke: *now scared* Why did I program him into my game?

*Scene: DG has a demented brain, as evidenced by this scene.*

Duke: What's it do? It takes down Yugi's Dark Magician!

Téa: It does? Just that?

Tristan: Hey, yeah, that does seem like a kind of limited weapon...

Téa: Yeah, I'd think that if I built a cannon, I'd want to be able to attack more than one enemy with it. If just for simplicity's sake.

*Scene: The Dark Assailant gets a free ride on top of the Monster Cannon.*

Duke: What's the matter Yugi? You've never heard of the Monster Cannon?

Yami: If I did, it wouldn't matter now since you're going to go on at length about it.

Duke: You're finally learning.

Yami: I already knew this. I was just humoring you before I kick your ass.

*Scene: Duke's earring has dots that reappear and disappear as the animators get lazy.*

Duke: That's too bad, 'cause if you had, you'd know that Monster Cannon is a weapon that fires a monster at the enemy instead of a cannonball.

Tristan: *sweatdrops* That's worse than the Kuriboh's self-destruct on contact with the enemy, almost.

Téa: No, because Duke's got enough monsters to sacrifice the Dark Assailant.

Yami: Why don't you just go and be his cheerleader then?

Téa: I'm considering doing that, but just because I like those uniforms...

*Scene: Duke points at the Dark Magician, who expresses mild concern over the situation.*

Duke: Today's target? Your Dark Magician! Monster Cannon! Ready? *Dark Assailant jumps into the cannon* Aim ... *camera goes to the Dark Magician* FIRE!

Monster Cannon: *fires a bunch of streamers at the Dark Magician*

Dark Magician: *smirks* Magical Hats and the Mystic Box aren't my only two tricks. *grabs a purple streamer out of the air*

Yami: *is laughing himself silly at the look of despair on Duke's face*

*Scene: Yami calls upon the Dark Magician's Magical Hats.*

Duke: You what?!

Yami: Conceal yourself with Magical Hats!

Tristan: *smirks* Betcha Duke's kicking himself for programming all of the Dark Magician's abilities and tricks into him, huh?

Téa: Ooh yeah...

*Scene: The hats appear and spread out for Duke to muse which houses the DM.*

Yami: Feeling lucky Devlin?

Duke: More like sick since you've even started ripping off Clint Eastwood.

Yami: *confused* Who?

Yugi: *takes over for a moment* He doesn't know about movies, Duke!

Duke: *pauses and takes a good look* Wait, you're Yugi! Then who the hell was I dueling?

Yugi: *grins* Yami!

Duke: *blink* You really need some therapy, kid.

Yugi: Don't I know it!

*Scene: The hats shuffle around.*

Duke: Your carnival tricks won't save you this time!

Yami: Yes they will. They've worked every other time perfectly, so why not now?

Duke: Just because!

Joey: Reduced to schoolboy retorts, Dukey?

*The cheerleaders snicker*

*Scene: Duke chooses his target.*

Duke: Monster Cannon! Attack the Dark Magician underneath the second hat from the left!

*Duke misses, because everyone always misses*

Joey: Everyone always attacks the middle hat ...

Yami: What did I tell you, Joey? No one ever learns.

*Scene: The Dark Magician pops out from the last Hat on the right.*

Duke: No! It can't be! He survived?!

Joey: OBVIOUSLY! Even I don't need to state dat!

Tristan: *smirk* So that does say a lot about Duke.

Téa: *smirk* It sure does.

Yami: *smirks as well* So if the cheerleaders think you're pathetic, then you really are hitting rock bottom, Devlin.

Duke: Shut up. That's all I have to say. Shut up.

*Scene: Yami is now set on revenge.*

Yami: I should thank you, Duke, for making the Dark Magician's special abilities in this game the same as in Duel Monsters!

Duke: *sighs and puts a hand to his head* That is the last time I make significant changes at the eleventh hour of finishing this game.

Yami: You and Kaiba should really have lunch together or something...

*Scene: Duke orders Yaranzo to retreat to his original square.*

Duke: *thinking* The Dark Magician has a few more special abilities, so I have to strengthen my defenses!

Yami: *mentally to Yugi* Can I mock him like he did to me when I said that?

Yugi: Sure, go ahead. *fiddles with his turtle*

Yami: Yay! Can I also turn it into a Punishment Game?

Yugi: No.

*Yami pouts*

*Scene: It's the Mystic Box, gaze in wonderment.*

Yami: Your warp vortex inspired me to find an alternative path to your side of the field.

Swords: *pierce the box*

Duke: *growls* How're you going to do that, by skewering your own monster?!

Yami: *exasperated* You programmed the Dark Magician into your game, you said yourself he had other special abilities and you don't know how Mystic Box works?!

Duke: *failing to come up with a descent excuse for his blunder* Ah, well ...

Tristan: I take it back Joey, Duke's stupider than you are.

*Scene: Duke's voice is becoming more and more panic-stricken.*

Duke: No! Yaranzo!! Your Magician switched positions with my monster! And now he's in attack position!

Dark Magician: *smirks and waves his finger, scolding Duke*

Duke: And now he's giving me attitude!

Yami: *smirks* But of course. He's my monster after all.

*Scene: Duke not only suffers defeat, he suffers an inverted defeat ALA the Dark Magic attack.*

Joey: Aha!! My dog days are over!

Yami: Actually, I'm considering keeping you in that suit.

Joey: WHAT?

Yami: Gotcha! *smirks*

Joey: You're cruel, man. CRUEL.

*Scene: In the back room.*

Duke: Yugi, I'm sorry I accused you of cheating. The better player won today, and it was you.

Yugi: Of course it was.

Duke: *sweatdrops* I suppose I deserved that.

*Scene: Duke apologizes more.*

Duke: You proved you really did beat Pegasus fair and square. Argh, I was such a creep today.

Joey: TODAY?

Duke: Hey, I'm not like this all the time.

Joey: Coulda fooled me...

*Scene: Ooh, an apology speech! Those are so fun to mock... so DG takes a shot at a couple of jokes.*

Duke: I was such a creep today. And thanks to those TV cameras, the whole world knows it. My store is ruined.

Téa: *sighs* And once again, he's back on himself...

*Scene: DG again. This is too much fun.*

Duke: I was such a creep today. And thanks to those TV cameras, the whole world knows it. My store is ruined.

Joey: Nah, what're you talkin' about, Duke? Everybody knows that unjustafiably smug an' cool is in right now!

Yugi: Yeah, that's right! *pets his Puzzle*

*Scene: Another scene by Deeg. D'ya think I'm overdoing this?*

Duke: My store is ruined. No-one's gonna wanna play Dungeon Dice Monsters now!

Yami: What about all my adoring fans?

Tristan: Or maybe anyone who wants to play an easy game! I mean, if Yuge here can pick it up in five minutes, than maybe people like Joey have a chance!

*Joey growls and puts a laughing Tristan in a headlock*

*Scene: Clown boy laments over the end of his store. By Deegie.*

Yugi: That's not true at all, Duke! Dungeon Dice Monsters has the potential to become a huge hit!

Grandpa: True, I haven't seen a game this exciting since Duel Monsters. You've got to keep your store open! Of course, then my store will go out of business, and me and my poor grandson will have to live on the streets... without anything to eat, or more than the clothes on our backs... but of course you should keep your store open! Oh, yes!

*Yugi looks distressed, while the others all sweatdrop*

Téa: Reaaaal generous, gramps.

*Scene: Same, this time by Sasha.*

Grandpa: True, I haven't seen a game this exciting since Duel Monsters. You've got to keep your store open.

Téa: There's more than enough room for two game stores in town!

Duke: *smirks* That's right, and I have them both. *holds up the deed that the DDM representative stole from Grandpa in the previous episode.*

Grandpa: *curses unlike an elderly man should*

*Scene: Let's boost his self-confidence more since we just destroyed it!*

Duke: No way! Do you really think so?

Joey: *admiring a purloined die* Sure! Dice Monsters is great. It's you I don't like.

Duke: That's enough free shots for you.

*Scene: Tristan sounds like that random duelist in KaibaLand.*

Tristan: *fingering another die* I'd love to learn how to play Dice Monsters!

Duke: I hope you realize I'm not going to give you something for plugging my game.

Tristan: *sighs* Worth a shot.

*Scene: Poor DG's in stitches from the show alone, but she'll try to type another scene anyway.*

Tristan: I'd love to learn how to play Dice Monsters!

Duke: I can teach you!

Tristan: Great!

Duke: Of course, I won't.

Tristan: Say what?!

Duke: Well, obviously I can teach you, since I created the game and all. But I don't like you that much.

Tristan: Why you... *growls and glares*

*Scene: Even Yugi's capable of a good pun. DG, again.*

Yugi: Now that Joey's out of the doghouse, maybe things'll get back to normal around here! Which means that I can finally get back to playing Duel Monsters.

Duke: Wow... You mean that hour where you couldn't because you were playing me was actually that hard?

Yugi: Yes. Yes, it was.

Duke: ... o.o;

*Scene: Everyone's being just a biiit too happy for Duke's taste.*

Duke: So that's it? How can you let me off so easy, Yugi?

Yugi: Honestly, it's either that or letting my yami put you into a punishment game for all the threats and insults.

Duke: I'll take that, then.

Yugi: *nods sagely* Good choice.

*Scene: Yugi seems to advocate a very Christian sense of forgiveness, don't you think? Scene by DG.*

Yugi: The game is over now. Let's just leave the fighting on the field, because revenge leaves you with nothing except more bad feelings, Duke.

Yami: *mentally* Unless, of course, you kill all the people who could be having those bad feelings...

Yugi: *mentally* While technically that works, I still think I prefer the other method, Yami.

Yami: *mutters* Spoilsport.

Yugi: Always...

*Scene: After Yugi's sweet, heartfelt, and wonderfully brief rant.*

Duke: I am sorry, and you're offering me something better than winning.

Yugi: *extends his hand* Friendship always is.

Tristan: Yugi does a better job of friendship speeches than Téa.

Téa: Grr...*thwacks Tristan*

Tristan: Ow... don't you know violence doesn't solve anything?

Téa: It gives me immediate satisfaction.

*Scene: Duke gets email... conveniently.*

Yugi: Hey, Duke, sounds like you got some new email!

Joey: Anything good?

Duke: *checks it* Only more spam. Anyway, you were saying?

*Scene: Thankfully, this email was not delivered by Funny Bunny.*

Joey: Anything good?

Duke: *checks it* It's from Kaiba. *blinks* He says to tell Yugi that you owe him one for helping you win the d... YOU CHEATED!

Yugi: *sweatdrops* Kaiba never did have good timing...

*Scene: Duke has a lemon computer... joke censored to preserve rating.*

Duke: Whoa! Industrial Illusions did send a contract after all!

Joey: Uh, may I inquire as to who wrote the contract? Pegasus is out of commission.

Yugi: Joey's right, that doesn't make any sense.

Duke: Even now you can't let me have my moment of happiness?

Yugi: No, afraid not.

*Duke groans*

*Scene: Actually, I've heard that Croquet is running II now. Isn't that cool? Oh, and, the rest of the scenes here are by DG.*

Duke: *all in one high-energy breath* Whoa! Industrial Illusions did send a contract after all and they wanna take Dungeon Dice Monsters global!

Tristan and Téa: You're in the money now, Duke!

Yugi: Congratulations to you. That's great!

Duke: Thank you so much, Yugi. I really couldn't've done it without you setting me straight.

Yugi: While I appreciate the sentiment, you do realize that a contract takes way longer to write than the twenty minutes since our game finished, right?

Joey: Yeah, ain't no way those suits coulda done it 'cause a that.

Duke: *wails* Can't I even be gracious right?!

Téa: *sweatdrops and whispers to the others* He might be popular, but I don't think he has many friends...

*The others nod, dot-eyed.*

*Scene: Nobody's willing to take credit. Ever. Ever ever ever.*

Yugi: Duke, you invented a great game.

Duke: But you made me see it was missing something -- original monsters so that people can't just waltz right in and pick it up on the spot. No game will ever be cool if just anybody can sit down and play it! I might have a great contract now, but it still needs a lot of work.

Téa: *mutters* "Me, me, me..."

*Scene: Yugi chatters happily about his game-playing philosophy.*

Yugi: It's about having fun and meeting and making new friends. *thinking* Because you never know where you're gonna find 'em! Or once you've met them, how close they're going to become.

Yami: *smiles and chuckles* That's right, Yugi!

Yugi: *beaming, mentally* I love you, Yami!

Yami: *smile faltering* That's very nice.

Yugi: You're my bestest friend!

Yami: Great... uhh... here, have a turtle! *throws a plushie at Yugi and flees to his own room*

Yugi: Ooh... turtle... *_*