Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Missing ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

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Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. I'm simply obsessed with it. Don't sue me, because I'm broke. /end boring legal junk

I apparently write Yu-Gi-Oh fic now. It's my newest obsession/weakness/whatever you may call it. I swear I'm 12. I think I lost 8 years in there somewhere. That's what I get from watching anime. This story was written for my best friend, who challenged me to write her a fic using certain people and a certain plot and well. Blame her. She thankfully avoids getting into this chapter, but NEXT chapter… *evil grin* It's a doozy- believe me! But you'll have to wait and see!

Summary: Bakura and Yugi and… the Dark Magician?

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MISSING - 5

"Please don't tell me I see that," Bakura muttered, hiding his face behind Yugi's hair and unconsciously imitating Tweety Bird. "I tawt I saw a Dark Magician!"

"You did," Yugi said, turning slightly in Bakura's lap to face the spirit. "Um, at least I think it's him."

"A tall guy in purple amour with blue eyes? Who currently looks like nothing would please him more than to kick my ass from here to the Shadow Realm? Who else would it be?"

Yugi laughed. "He doesn't like you."

"I guessed that for myself, thanks."

"Baka tomb robber!"

"Idiot hikari!"

Yugi was suddenly and almost violently pulled out of Bakura's arms by the Dark Magician, who shoved the boy behind him and glared at Bakura.

"What?" Bakura exclaimed. "I'm not going to do anything! You'll kick my ass!"

The Dark Magician nodded before swiveling his head to look at the boy behind him. Who was currently examining the… behind of him.

"Hey, the armor goes all the way around his body!" Yugi's voice came from somewhere behind the purple-clad man. "And it fits nicely."

"YUGI!" Bakura shouted. "Does Yami know you think like that?"

"Okay, maybe Yami doesn't know everything," admitted Yugi, head appearing under one of the Dark Magician's arms before it disappeared again, followed by admiring sounds. The Dark Magician stood patiently, his face red, while his young Master studied every inch of him. And felt quite a few inches while he was at it. "I like him. Can I keep him?"

"Yugi… he's a monster-" Bakura paused when he saw the look the card was giving him, "-okay, a card. You own him-it-whatever!" The spirit shook his head. "Why couldn't I have been trapped in here with *Malik* or *Marik*? At least they're normal! And they don't walk around with… hey! Yugi! How'd he get here?"

The boy was silent for a moment before, "how am I supposed to know? The lights went out and when they came back on, I was in your lap and there he was."

"Okay, so how did you get here?" Bakura said to the Dark Magician who only pointed at Yugi, who had now begun exploring the front of his favorite card's body. And a certain part of the Dark Magician currently held Yugi's fascination, as it was just the right height… "Okay, I didn't need to see that."

"Who knew cards came equipped?"

"Yugi!" Bakura buried his face in his hands, fighting his own blush. Well, it was clear that nobody had to worry about someone molesting the boy, but who was going to stop the boy from molesting *them*?

"What! I've always wondered if… well, if the outfit looked as good in person as it does on the card. Kaiba's holographic technology helped a bit, but this is the real thing, Bakura! Now I don't mind being stuck here so much!"

Bakura's face was still hidden and the Dark Magician sighed, fighting the urge to swat the boy's wandering hands as Yugi now had a hold of his staff. (AN: and OH that sounds bad! Almost as bad as the Malik/Rod jokes…)

"Yugi, I think your yami and I are going to have a talk when we get home about protecting a hikari's innocence!"

"Yeah, like you protect Ryou's innocence! You probably let him watch gay porn and read slash fanfic."

Bakura gaped. How could Yugi have known that?

"And his favorite show is probably "Queer as Folk" and you both probably secretly love watching anime because the characters are all either so girly, or so buff, and… Bakura? Feel free to stop me when I'm wrong."

The Dark Magician removed Yugi's hands from his staff, only to have the boy's hands begin exploring his over-tunic. Or more specifically, what was *under* the over-tunic.

"Yugi, stop molesting the Dark Magician," Bakura finally said, pulling Yugi away from the man. "Before you scar him for life. And he still hasn't explained how he got here." The card again pointed at Yugi, who only looked confused before his face brightened.

"OH! Wait! Before we ended up here!"

"Yes…"

"Yami and I were dueling! And I had the Dark Magician in my hand! Then something distracted us and I put him in my pocket!"

"So that's a card in your pocket and you're not happy to see me? Or him?" Bakura teased. Yugi turned bright red and the spirit blinked. "You've spent the last however long molesting the Dark Magician and now you're BLUSHING at a joke? You're a paradox, Yugi. I'm glad Pharaoh's stuck with you and not me!"

"Oh, shut up. Baka tomb robber."

"Idiot, innocent hikari." Then Bakura looked over at the still slightly pink Dark Magician and amended his statement. "Okay, idiot not-so-innocent hikari."

Yugi bounced excitedly next to him. "You think he'll let me see what's under the armor?"

"REALLY not-so-innocent hikari. Pharaoh, you and I are going to have a *long* talk. After we get your Dark Magician out of therapy."