Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction / Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Witch Hunter Robin Fan Fiction / Crossover Fan Fiction ❯ The Gohan and Fred Show ❯ The Overpriced 12th Chapter (note: cannot spell 12th) ( Chapter 12 )

Disclaimer: I own nothing. (To all those who celebrate it, Happy Easter. Don't eat too many chocolate bunnies. Not cause they're bad for you, but because they don't like it and they're planning to retaliate. That's why I never trust anything that looks like an animal and is edible.... unless it's already dead. But this episode is dedicated to the holiday.... Okay, I'm lying. But the idea works so quit giving me that look. And just so you know, this is a long chapter.)

The Gohan and Fred Show (episode 12)

Gohan: Hello and welcome to the Gohan...

Fred: And Fred...

Gohan: Show. As usual, we have Kevin here with us.

Kevin: And I'm not drunk this time.

Gohan: Don't remind me.

Fred: Hey, what we did was very important to the healing process.

Gohan: So when you want to get better mentally you start to kill your liver.

Fred: Exactly.

Kevin: Okay, enough talk. Let's get on with the show.

Gohan: Wait. Something doesn't seem right about this. (notices Kevin as a strange smile on his face) OH NO!!! You're going to hurt me.

Kevin: Only mentally. Here's our guests. I thought it would be appropriate, considering it being a family holiday weekend and all. (hands Gohan a card)

Gohan: (reads the card) All these people are our guests?

Kevin: Yep. It's Easter, Gohan. You're supposed to spend it with your family.

Gohan: Whatever. Today's guests are Cooler, Frieza, Goten, and Matt. (notices the last name) Who's Matt?

Kevin: He's my brother. He's a marine.

Gohan: So, I'm a Saiyan. I could kick his ass.

Matt: (walking out with the other guests) Wanna bet? (he starts showing off that he has muscles.... son of a bitch)

Gohan: (leaning in to Kevin) You didn't say he was ripped.

Kevin: (talking to Gohan) You never asked. Besides, he's a worse fighter than you. He's only human.

Gohan: Yeah, but so are you.

Kevin: Yeah, but I'm insane. I mean, I talk to a stuffed monkey, for God's sake.

Fred: (coming over to join the conversation) How many times have I told you not to mention that? You know how much I hate it when you call me stuffed.

Kevin: Who cares? We got guests to tend to. (turns to guests) So how are... (notices Matt is holding an orange stuffed monkey) What the hell is that?

Matt: It is.... Miguel.

Kevin: You stole my gimmick.

Matt: No. Your monkey is turquoise. Mine is neon orange. It's totally different.

Kevin: It's not different. It's wrong.

Fred: (pointing at Miguel) It's you...

Miguel: Si, it is I. Miguel.

Kevin: (to Fred) Umm.. do you two know each other?

Fred: Yes. He is my arch-nemesis.

Kevin: Wow, what a small world.

Goten: Can I talk now?

Everyone else: NO!!!

Goten: (mumbling) Bastards.

Frieza: (to Cooler) You know, these earthlings almost make us look normal.

Cooler: (taking a hit off his bong) Huh? What'd you say?

Frieza: Do you have to do that now?

Cooler: Dude, you know how nervous I am when I'm on TV.

Matt: Don't worry. It's not even basic cable.

Kevin: You crack bastard. Do you know how hard I've worked on this show?

Matt: And do you know how hard I've worked to defend our country from terrorists?

Kevin: (staring at Matt for a long time) You're a cook. And you didn't even go over seas.

Matt: I know. The government was holding me as their secret weapon. I have mastered the ancient arts of Kitchen-Fu. Even carrots are deadly when it comes to me.

Kevin: Yeah, all you have to do is put them in any of your cooking. That would kill anyone.

Matt: Say what you want. But we both know one thing.

Kevin: What's that?

Matt: Mom and Dad love me more.

Kevin: That's bullshit and you know it.

Gohan: Will you two knock it off? We have a show to do here.

Goten: Can I talk now?

Everyone: NO!!!

Goten: (mumbling) Bastards.

Fred: (to Miguel) All I want to know is one thing. How did you escape the volcano?

Miguel: A magician never reveals all of his secrets.

Fred: I thought you worked as a mailman.

Miguel: It's just an expression you idiot.

Fred: I'll idiot you. (he pounces on Miguel and starts to pummel him)

Matt: Get off my monkey.

Kevin: I'll monkey you. (Kevin tries to pounce on Matt, but misses. They roll around on the ground punching each other.)

Goten: Can I talk now?

Gohan: NO!

Goten: Why not?

Gohan: Cause you're more retarded than Kevin and Fred combined.

Kevin and Fred: (stopping for a moment) HEY!!

Goten: I'll retarded you. (they engage in an impressive aerial battle. Cooler and Frieza sit and watch all this.)

Cooler: (looking at Gohan and Goten fight) Okay, I know I didn't smoke that much, but those dudes are f*cking flying.

Frieza: Moron, you can fly too.

Cooler: Whoa. Did you take the acid too?

Frieza: Alright, screw this. I obviously won't be able to tell anyone about my return to Riverdancing on this show. (everyone suddenly stops)

Everyone: What?

Frieza: Yeah, I'm returning to my dream job. I wonder if it's too late to talk to Conan.

Matt: Wait. Riverdancing?

Frieza: Yeah. Why is that a problem?

Everyone: (stare blankly for a long time) KILL HIM!!! (they all rush Frieza. A cloud builds up and when it's gone, only ashes are left)

Cooler: Whoa. I must be pretty f*cked up. (he wanders off stage)

Kevin: Well, I'm glad that got taken care of.

Matt:Yeah, stuff always seems to work out in the end.

Gohan: But what was the whole point of the show?

Kevin: I don't know. I think it's just a filler episode.

Goten: I know all about filler episodes.

Kevin: Yes. Yes you do.

Goten: Hehe.. I got to say something. My job is done here. (he runs off stage)

Gohan: I think Mom hit him in the head one too many times when he was little.

Fred: (to Miguel) I still hate you.

Miguel: I hate you too.

Gohan: Whoa. What's the matter with you two?

Fred: It's all his fault.

Miguel: No. It was your fault.

Kevin: I think we should get to the bottom of this.

Matt: Actually, I think I know what this is all about.

Kevin: You do?

Matt: Yes. Fred and Miguel.... are brothers. (Dun Dun Dunnnnnn)

Miguel: It's true. We are brothers.

Fred: That doesn't change the fact that I hate you.

Kevin: I get it now. It's the Angel-Devil Theory.

Matt: Right, Kevin. (pulls down a chart) You see, when children are born, they are given a trait. They are either an Angel or a Devil. In case of siblings, the traits interchange. If the first born, like me, were an Angel, then the second born, like Kevin, is a Devil.

Kevin: It's true. But what about in cases of more than two children?

Matt: The pattern continues. That is why Nick is an Angel and Caitilin is a Devil. (my younger brother is Nick and my little sister is Caitilin... as if you couldn't figure that out) And it is usually the first born that is the Angel. So that is why Miguel is an Angel.

Gohan: Miguel's the Angel?

Kevin: As if you couldn't tell. He just reeks of disgusting goodness.

Fred: And it makes me want to kill him more.

Miguel: You had your chance and failed at the volcano.

Kevin: (to Fred) Do we even want to know?

Fred: No. It's too gruesome.

Miguel: And to think. This all started over a girl.

Kevin: Whoa. We need details.

Gohan: But Kevin, we're running out of time.

Kevin: Damn. This issue must be settled.

Matt: I'll sum it up then. Miguel was in love with this girl and Fred killed her.

Fred: She was a whore.

Miguel: But she was my whore.

Gohan: That's not nice to say about a girl.

Miguel: No, she really was a whore. I paid for her and everything.

Kevin: Wait. I thought you were an Angel.

Miguel: I am. Or at least, I was. Now, I've devoted my life to evil. Just to piss off my brother.

Gohan: Well, that's about all the time we have for today. You'll just have to join us next time to find out what the hell is going on. (cameras start to fade) I think I need a drink.

Now, I know some of you may be asking why the hell I put my brother in a story. For some reason that is beyond me, he wanted to be in one. So I put him in this one. I don't even know why he wanted to, as he doesn't watch a lot of anime. Except for some Yu-Gi-Oh. He does get some of the references I make though. But that doesn't matter. What does matter is reviewing. Which you should do...... now.