Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ The Battle Lord Chronicles: Of Truths and Lies ❯ The Real Life ( Chapter 38 )

 

Thanks to my beta reader, Anna Jaganshi.

 

------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------

 

Of Truth & Lies

Chapter 38
The Real Life

 

------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------

 

"JASON?!"

 

Not even thinking, I dashed forward, dropping to my knees next to Jason's body. "Nononononononono," I moaned. I reached out and began to frantically shake his shoulders. "Get up, Jason! Get up!"

 

My hysteria seemed to break everyone out of their shocked stupors. Jessica let out a choked sob while Kiara took a few stumbling steps backwards, her hands covering her mouth in shock.

 

Chris quickly moved next to me, "Kristy," he said, his voice cracking.

 

I wanted to find somewhere to hide
And I opened up and let those fears inside
And I wanted to be anyone else
Only to find that there was no one there but me

 

I felt something on my face. I reached up to touch it and my hand came back wet. 'Tears?' I thought, feeling strangely detached. I hadn't noticed that I'd started crying. Nonetheless, I was indeed crying. Tears poured down my face and a few broken sobs tore themselves from my throat.

 

Abruptly, a wild fury seemed to burst its way up from within me. My face set in a vicious snarl, I leapt up from my position and spun around to where Bashere had been last.

 

"Bashere!" I roared. "Come back here you bastard!"

 

Quickly, Chris jumped up as well, grabbing onto my arm. When I jerked out of his grip and took a step forward he immediately wrapped his arms around me, pinning my arms to my sides and holding me back once more. Snarling angrily, I instantly began to struggle against him, attempting to break loose. He held on tightly until I managed to elbow him in the stomach, causing him to let go in order to grasp his stomach.

 

But I woke up to the real life
And I realized It's not worth running from anymore
When there was nowhere left to hide I found out
That nothings real here but I won't stop now until I find a better part of me

 

Before I could move however Yusuke and Kurama were suddenly beside me, each holding onto one of my arms. They kept their grips as I struggled against them until I finally wore myself out. I dropped to my knees then, sobbing.

 

Time after that seemed to pass in a blur. I think that I might have passed out once, but I couldn't really remember. My mind was all hazy.

 

The first thing that I can clearly remember is lying curled upon my hotel bed. Both grief and anger were warring for supremacy in my mind. At the moment grief was winning; there would be plenty of time for anger later.

 

Jason was dead. That's all there was to it. My elder brother, the person whom had practically raised me, who had trained me, was dead. I couldn't think of anything else. My mind was clouded with thoughts of him. Sure, I'd gotten annoyed at Jason so often, but he was my brother. My brother. And he was dead.

 

I knew without a doubt why Bashere--the very thought of his name sent a spark of anger through me--had killed him. He'd just about said it after all. He wanted to fight me, not Jason, so he'd killed him. Just like that, without even blinking an eye. Like it didn't matter. And to him, it probably didn't.

 

I let those hard days get me down
And all the things I hate got in my way
I could've screamed without a sound
I found myself silenced by those things they say

 

I heard the door to my room open and close, but I didn't pay it any mind. I then felt a pressure on the edge of my bed, signifying that the person had sat down. From their energy, I knew without looking that it was Hiei, I normally would have been surprised by his presence--it was uncharacteristic of him--but at the moment the thought barely even passed through my mind.

 

"For a couple of months I kept having the same dream," I said suddenly. Hiei didn't reply, waiting for me to continue. "In the dream there was a faceless girl. She was running through some woods as fast as she could, being chased by a bunch of formless shapes--monsters. At the same time she was running towards an oasis, a paradise. Running from something and running toward something...

 

"I never was able to understand what the dream was about. I thought that it was just some stupid repeating nightmare that wouldn't leave me alone."(1)

 

I paused for a moment. "...I think..." I continued, "...I think that I understand it now. It wasn't just some girl who was running...it was me. For my whole life I've been running from things. From my past, my problems...At the same time I was striving for a happy, perfect life where nothing went wrong." I noticed that my tone had grown slightly bitter, but didn't care. "I feel...as though I've been sleeping for a long time. Dreaming. And now I'm just waking up. Waking up to the real world; my real life. Where things aren't always happy. Where I acknowledge that I do have problems. Where people..." My voice cracked slightly. "...Where people do die."

 

But I woke up to the real life
And I realized It's not worth running from anymore
When there was nowhere left to hide I found out
That nothings real here but I won't stop now until I find a better part of me that's out there somewhere
And It can't be that far away
That's where I'll find myself
And I'll find my way out
That's where I'll find out

 

After that neither Hiei nor I said anything for a long time. I think that we were both contemplating my words. When Hiei did finally speak, it was in a slow, soft tone.

"I think that we all wake up from our childhood. Some get to wake up slowly, drifting from their sleep. Others, however, are jerked awake harshly. Either way, though, we all wake up. We all grow up."

 

I couldn't help but chuckle lightly. I'd never figured Hiei to be a metaphorical, poetic kind of guy.

 

"I have a little sister, you know," Hiei said suddenly. I found myself blinking in surprise. Hiei had a sister?! "I could never imagine having to watch her die. I won't say that it will be alright--it won't be--but...you'll be fine, you know. You're strong enough to pull through this."

 

After another moment the weight lifted from the bed. A second later the door clicked shut, signaling Hiei's departure.

 

"...Thank you, Hiei," I murmured into the silence.

 

But I woke up to the real life
And I realized It's not worth running from anymore
When there was nowhere left to hide I found out
That nothing's real here but I won't stop now until I find a better part of me

 

------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------

 

The next morning I left before anyone else was even up and headed toward the training grounds. Now that Jason was dead I was the one who was going to have to fight Bashere, so I needed to train as much as I could for that. I may have wasted one afternoon in my grief, but I still had two days before the fight and now that my sorrow had settled down a bit my anger was back in full force. I would kill Bashere. He had taken every single member of my family away from me.

 

As I walked through the streets from the town all of the youkai whom happened to be up and about paused to stare at me. They said nothing and made no movements, but rather just silently followed me with their eyes. It was highly unnerving and sent shivers down my spine. I quickened my pace, half jogging until I reached the outskirts of town.

 

Once I was in an isolated training ground I began to work out my frustration while enhancing my technique. Like usual time seemed to fly by and before I knew it was already high noon. Panting as sweat poured down my face I came to a stop. One of my katana was held out before me between my two hands.

 

I began to lower my arms until I suddenly heard rustling sound behind me. Cursing my inattention--and wondering why I always seemed to be interrupted while I was training--I quickly spun around. I relaxed again however when a girl in Healer's robes pushed her way into the clearing.

 

I had nothing to fear from a Healer. They devoted their entire lives to the art of healing, to the point that it was almost physically impossible for them to purposefully harm another being. Well, that and if they broke their Healer vows by harming someone their own youki would instantly kill them.

 

Healers in the Makai were almost sacred, in a way. In a world filled with violence and warfare, people who did just the opposite were almost automatically revered. It was completely unthinkable to even harm a Healer in anyway, let alone kill one. I'd once heard a story from Jin about a youkai whom, in a rage, had hurt a Healer. All of the youkai around him had instantly torn into the youkai, killing him brutally.

 

It was interesting to see both the similarities and the differences between the Healers of the Makai and the doctors of the Ningenkai. One major difference was that, unlike doctors, Healers were not paid for their work. Instead they were given food and lodging wherever they went. There was no fear of anyone taking advantage of this; the blue robes of a Healer set them apart from the rest of the population and no one would dare to impersonate a Healer.

 

Focusing my attention back onto the Healer, I watched in confusion as she hesitantly approached me. She looked familiar, I suddenly realized, and for a moment I thought that she was the Healer who had helped me when I was poisoned, but then I quickly noticed some slight differences. This girl's purple hair was much longer, for instance.

Once she was a few feet from me, the Healer stopped and gave me a quick, but deep bow. "I apologize for interrupting, Kristy-sama," she murmured.

 

My eyes widened in surprise at the title. I opened my mouth uncomfortably, but found that no words would come to me. Apparently taking my silence as a go-ahead to speak, the Healer continued.

 

"I am Yuki, a Healer. I have come to give you this." Quite suddenly she bowed deeply again, nearly bending in half. At the same time she thrust her hands forward in front of her, holding something out toward me. She stayed in that position until I had hesitantly accepted it.

 

Turning the object over in my hands I found it to be a jar of medical salve, for wounds, most likely. I looked up at Yuki questioningly.

 

"Ah, it's some salve I made," she told me brightly. "I've always been very good at making salves. I figured that it would be helpful to you, if you're ever wounded with no Healers around."

 

I nodded my thanks, but was still confused. "But...don't you work for Bashere? Why are you helping me?"

 

Yuki's expression darkened slightly. "I work for the Battle Lord of Makai, who just so happens to be Bashere-sama at this time." She hesitated then, glancing around as if afraid to continue. "Bashere-sama, he...He was fine at first. He was a good, strong youkai. But then...H-he, he was insane. There's no other way to say it. He started having these random bursts of irrational rage and violence. And because of his power no one was able to stop him.

 

"Eventually Bashere-sama brought back this tournament, even though it'd been banned. For the past 1000 or so years the Battle Lord have just been using singular challenges to decide the Lord, as in whoever challenged the Battle Lord and won--at any time--was the new Warlord.

 

"Bashere-sama's decision to bring back the tournament was very surprising, especially since he'd only been the Lord for about seven years. Even in the past tournaments were spaced 200 years apart. But then, little Bashere-sama does these days makes much sense."

 

Even if Yuki didn't, I understood why Bashere had held the tournament. He'd wanted to draw Jason and me out. His title hadn't been important; it'd just been a means to an end.

 

"Well," Yuki said. "He...he's gotten even worse within the past year." She paused to take a breath. "I have a sister, you see. She was a Healer too, in the infirmary--" My mind momentarily flashed to the Healer with the short purple hair that'd helped me when I'd been poisoned(2). "--But just recently she disappeared. Everyone knows where she was last though. Bashere killed her. A Healer! And this isn't the first time either; it's well known that he's killed Healers before!"

 

I felt myself paling. Even I, born and raised in the Ningenkai, understood how much of an atrocious, unforgivable act it was to harm a Healer, let alone intentionally kill one. Why had no one stopped Bashere yet, especially since it was so clear that he was unstable?

 

"Everyone hates him, but no one can do anything about it," Yuki continued as if reading my mind. "People have tried to bring him down, certainly, but they've all disappeared without a trace. He- he's just too powerful." She then looked up at me with wide, pleading eyes. "Please, please stop Bashere-sama. I've seen you fight. With your linage, you're like no youkai that I've ever seen before. Please kill Bashere!"

 

I opened and closed my mouth repeatedly, but was unable to find any words to say. This certainly wasn't what I'd been expecting when I'd first seen Yuki. Did so many youkai really hate Bashere that much? Were they really that desperate to have him killed?

 

I would have fought my hardest against him anyway because I wanted revenge for my parents and my brother, but this situation was only adding fuel to the fire. Bashere was insane and a danger to himself and others. For the sake of the Makai, he needed to be taken out of power.

 

"I will," I said softly. "I will win against Bashere."

 

Yuki beamed down at me--even she was taller than me, dammit!--and almost seemed to be shaking.

 

"Thank you," she managed to get out in a choked voice. "Thank you so much."

 

No more words needed to be said and so, after a moment, Yuki bowed low to me once more and then swept back into the foliage, out of sight. For a long time after she'd left I just stood in the middle of that clearing, jar of salve in hand, thinking. My mind was racing with thoughts of Bashere, Jason...Hiei...Kami, I was so confused. What should I do? How would I be able to get through this?

 

'You have such dark thoughts, little puppy,' a voice suddenly said, cutting through my mind. My eyes widened, immediately recognizing who it was.

 

'Jagan?!' I gasped. I quickly began looking around me. 'How are you speaking to me? Is Hiei nearby or something?'

 

The Jagan chuckled. 'I amthe Jagan. I could speak to you if I was worlds away.' He offered to further explain and, in the end, I decided not to ask. Everything surrounding him was way too confusing.

 

I let out a sigh. 'Whatever. What do you want? I was in the middle of training...'

 

'Actually, you were in the middle of thinking.' Was it just me or did he sound amused?

 

'Yeah, well, I have a lot to think about,' I said defensively.

 

'Like that Healer's words, for one?'

 

'Eh? You heard that conversation?'

 

'No,' he replied simply. 'And technically I couldn't have anyway, since I don't have ears.'

 

I paused, confused. 'Wait, what? Then how did you know...?'

 

It was the Jagan's turn to sigh. 'How many times am I going to have to tell you? I'm the Jagan. I see all.'

 

I flushed in embarrassment. 'Erm, yes, well...'

 

The Jagan began chuckling suddenly. Slowly the sound began to fade, as if he was moving away. After a few moments it faded completely into silence and I knew that he was gone.

 

'Well, that was rather pointless,' I grumbled in annoyance. Why had he even "visited" me in the first place?

 

Letting out a huff of air, I began to walk off. My life was so screwed up it wasn't even funny.