Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Breathe No More ❯ Tumble and Slide ( Chapter 4 )

Breathe no More
Chapter four
Tumble and slide

Haru was still asleep when Shigure just left, and really didn't seem to notice the sudden lack of contact, and just slipped deeper into slumber. He must have been sleepier than he'd thought; usually, he was a light sleeper. Light enough to notice when someone let go of his hand, anyway.

Or maybe Shigure is just that good. Either way, he just passed by Hatori's to assure him the ox was just fine before heading back to his own home.

Well, no matter how good Shigure was, it didn't explain the ox not wanting to get up the next morning, when he'd gotten well over twelve hours of sleep. He'd have to ask Hatori about that later, Haru decided as he got dressed to go to school.

"Not getting enough oxygen does that." The dragon responded idly when asked about that. "Fatigue. Your muscles, brain, et cetera, need air to function. The scars caused by your disease don't allow you to get all that oxygen."

"Oh..." Haru blinked a little, thinking that over. It did make sense. "That sucks." He decided after a couple seconds. First, this stupid sickness made it so he couldn't breathe all the time, and now it made him sleepy too? He had Black to do that, already!

"Yes. Terminal illnesses tend not to be fun..." The doctor murmured. He felt kind of bad about it, but there wasn't anything he could do.

"I kind of figured that out." He nodded, still thinking about the entire situation.

"You've been spending time with Shigure?" Hatori wondered idly. He wasn't certain to what extent their little relationship went, but he wasn't stupid, even if Shigure tried to hide it for just everyone-in-general's safety. Hatori was his best friend and could very well tell. He did have to wonder how Haru stood the idiot, though.

"Yeah..." Haru confirmed absently, only half paying attention to what he was being asked, or what his reply was.

The dragon almost smiled at him. If the kid hadn't had a terminal illness he would have hoped Shigure would annoy the living hell out of him. Instead, he went off to keep working. Haru could LEAVE any time now.

And he did. He probably would have, even if Hatori had still been speaking. He did, however, snap out of his slight trance, once he was outside. He wanted to go see Shigure...So, he set out, silently praying he would be able to actually FIND his way there...

He didn't use the most direct path, and it took a while. But he usually makes it eventually. The only problem was that when he did arrive, Shigure wasn't there.

"Mit-chan showed up and dragged him off." Yuki stated simply. He was home alone since Kyo was at his lessons and Tohru was at work.

"Great...!" Haru groaned, panting heavily from the walk over, and leaning against the house a bit, as he struggled to catch his breath. It wasn't working very well, though. "That's fucking PERFECT." He really wasn't talking to Yuki, just ranting in general.

The rat looked at him oddly, stooping down to look at his leaned over cousin a bit.

"What did you do, run over here?" He blinked carefully. Maybe the ox needed something important?

"No." Haru replied automatically, though he could have kicked himself afterward. He should have lied and said "yes", damnit!

"Do you want to come inside?" His older cousin wondered. He was breathing hard for having not run. Maybe he needed to sit down and get a drink? Maybe he was sick?

"Sure." He agreed, before breaking into a fit of coughing. That hadn't happened before...well, not unless he had a cold, usually. "Thanks." he choked out, once he was done.

"Are you all right?" Yuki didn't think the whole choking and coughing thing sounded too great. He moved aside and they headed to an area with seats.

"Eh...sort of, for now." He replied vaguely. He hadn't been able to do a great job lying to Yuki since he'd met him, and the rat could always see through him when he tried. So, he'd stopped trying, after a while.

"'For now'?" The rodent repeated. "That now requires elaboration."

"Yuki...!" Haru whined a little. He'd never been able to tell him "no", either. And he now cursed that weakness ten times over. "Look, I'm sick, but it's nothing you need to worry about. I'm not contagious, so I'm not going to give it to you."

"Why are you here if you're sick?" Yuki sounded almost worried. Shouldn't he be home resting, or something?

"Tori-nii can't do anything about it." Haru shrugged a little. "And, there's no way I'm just going to sit around and rot, hoping it goes away."

"What are you talking about?" The older Sohma cocked his head to one side. Haru sure was being talkative, but he really wasn't saying anything either.

"I told you," Haru offered him an odd look. "I'm sick, and Tori-nii can't fix me."

"That doesn't tell me much."

"Well, what do you want?" Haru asked him in frustration. "A name?" He really didn't want to give it out, and worry Yuki...

"Okay?"

Haru just groaned and rested his face in his hands.

"Pulmonary Fibrosis." He told Yuki, honestly not caring if he knew what it was or what it did. He didn't plan to explain. Mostly because he wasn't exactly sure himself.

"And it does --?" Haru sure was being difficult about this.

"I honestly don't know." He admitted, running his fingers through his hair, and looking up again. "Something about scarred tissue in the lungs, I think. Either way, it means my lungs don't work right, and it's --" he paused. Did he really want to tell Yuki he was dying? No. "--terminal." But he did, anyway.

A very odd look came to Yuki's face.

"And you deemed this unworthy to share?"

"Yes." He nodded matter-of-factly. "It's embarrassing, and...I don't want to worry anyone..." The only reason Yuki knew was because he was Yuki. Haru told him that, too.

"Okay..." The rat mumbled.

"So...when's Sensei coming home?" The ox asked a moment later. He really wanted to see Shigure...

Yuki looked around for a clock until he saw the time.

"Not for a couple hours, probably about fiveish..." He looked back at his cousin. "You can wait for him, if you want..."

"That'd be great." He agreed. It would save him from having to walk home, and back again...

So he ended up spending time with rodent boy. Said mouse was having a bit of problems. Terminal illness? As in death? Why, yes... He didn't want Haru to die. He'd had enough fear and conceit to keep telling Haru "no" for all those years in the hopes that he could keep getting the affection without having to worry about fucking up an actual relationship. But now that he was going to die... Maybe he should stop being such a pussy and actually respond like he wants to be responded to? Maybe. Well. He looked up at the clock a bit later. He better do it soon or Shigure was going to get home, and he didn't think he'd be able to work the nerve up again. Maybe this was a bad idea... Well, fuck. He finally just went right ahead and did it.
'Kissing Haru is a bad idea!' his poor little brain was squealing.... But it was ignored.

Haru made an odd little gasping sound when he was kissed. WHY was this happening? Did God really hate him that much? For YEARS he'd wanted this, and Yuki picked NOW to actually do it? Now, when he had a boyfriend -- who, by the way, was coming home any minute?

The rat pressed closer on instinct as he continued. His heart was beating loudly in his ears, keeping him from hearing the sound of the door a few minutes later. Well. There was Shigure. He was feeling vaguely irritated at being dragged off like that. It was too late to really get angry about it now, but what if Haru had come by and needed him? On his way to the stairs he spotted his cousin's in the living room and raised an interested eyebrow at the sight before him.

"What was that?" Haru spluttered, pulling back, after a moment.

His older cousin hung his head and blushed rather darkly.

"I've wanted to--"

"But--" He protested a little. "But, why NOW?" Why not last month? While he was still single?

"Why not now?" Yuki offered weakly.

"Well...I...and he...I'm not..." He stammered, as red as Yuki was. "Single!" He finished finally. "I'm not single."

Yuki and Shigure were both amazed to hear that. The poor little rat stared at him and got even darker in the face. Yes. He'd waited too long. He'd fucked up, and... Why was Shigure standing over there...?Haru blinked, and followed his cousin's line of vision, over to his boyfriend.

"Sensei..." He winced a little. Shigure had just seen him kissing Yuki. Well, actually, he'd seen Yuki kissing him, but wasn't it the same thing?

"Don't let me ruin your moment, boys." The dog laughed softly. He didn't want the ox to turn down Yuki on his account. His little lover had waited years for that; he wasn't about to fuck that up for him. So, he told them to carry on before turning and heading for his study.

"Damnit!" Haru growled, unhappily. Stupid, useless, ass! "Yuki, I..." He trailed off, and just got up to go after Shigure. This needed to be sorted out. Right. Then.


Shigure was humming idly in his office as he sorted through some papers on his desk. He had a list of his projects written down, and since he'd just finished a book he wondered which one he felt like doing next. Maybe he could go change out of this suit first... Or Haru could come into his office and he could just keep sorting through the papers on his desk like it's nothing.

"Look," Haru spoke up, before Shigure could brush it off as nothing. "About what happened out there...I never -- I mean, I didn't..." He trailed off, and tried to sort through his words. "That is...damnit all! HE kissed ME!" That really was all there was to it...

"Why didn't you kiss him back?" The brunette snorted. Maybe that paper was in one of his drawers...

Haru gave him a confused look, and repeated what he'd told Yuki.

"Because I'm not single...?" He offered, raising an eyebrow.

"Psssh." Shigure absently waved that off. "Never stopped anyone before, Haa-kun."

"I'm NOT going to cheat on you..." Haru murmured, still confused. He was actually in a relationship with someone he cared about, who cared about him, too, and whom Akito would never touch. Why on earth would he give that up?

"You're one of the few who would see that particular situation as cheating." The dog pointed out making a triumphant noise when he finally found his paper and began looking over the title names. "Yuki was first in line, after all."

"But...that doesn't make any difference." Haru pointed out. "I mean, YOU'RE the one who I'm actually with." Or, at least, he was pretty sure of that -- for the moment, anyway. So, unless Shigure intended to break up with him, that statement was one-hundred-percent true.

Shigure smiled at him. "Haa-kun, I'm not a little boy. I'm not going to be mopey and terribly hurt if you wanted to go with Yuki, the one you've been in love with for years, now that he's shown he has interest in you." Okay, that was a lie. He would be mopey and a bit hurt, but he wouldn't ever, ever show it.

"I DO have morals..." Haru felt he should point out, with a small frown. Shigure was NOT going to break up with him...He wouldn't be dumped again...

"Of course. But you have feelings too, and apparently so does Yuki-kun."

"Spit it out." Haru ordered, getting a bad feeling in his stomach. "What're you saying?

"Don't waste your chance?" Haru has a terminal illness. Wasting his chance would be amazingly stupid.

"I told you!" Haru frowned a little. "I'm not going to cheat on you."

"Haa-kun, this isn't really about me anymore." Shigure chuckled. "It's not about your morals. It's about what you want. You're not getting another shot at this." He stated bluntly.

"But...if it doesn't work..." He would be loosing two people in one move. He wasn't sure if he could handle that...

"I thought you said you didn't want to live what time you had being afraid?" The dog changed tactics and taunted slightly.

"I don't." He frowned a bit. "I also don't want to fuck up."

"You really should stop worrying about that all the time." His older cousin chuckled. "Between you and Yuki-kun, that's why it's taken as long as it has for anything at all to happen between you."

"Look," Haru growled slightly. "If you're going to dump me, do it now. I don't have time to stand around and wait for you to make up your mind."

"It is made up, Haa-kun." The dog grinned mischievously and propped his elbow up on his desk and rested his face in his hand.

"That doesn't excuse not informing me."

"But it is more fun to make you guess."

"I should smack you." Haru mused with an exasperated look. "Or, better yet, knee you in the groin."

"Pain is no good." Shigure pouted a little. "You'd ruin my fun and hit me?"

"Yes." He nodded. "Most assholes get hit during the breaking up process."

"Grumpy, grumpy!" The author continued to tease.

"I'm serious!" Haru spat, his breathing speeding up slightly. "I really should hit you!"

"If it would make you feel better?"

"I'm leaving now." Haru informed him, backing up toward the door. He could feel tears prickling behind his eyes, but he wasn't going to cry over this. He wouldn't give Shigure that.

"Haa-kun...." The dog sighed. He was pushing just a bit too hard. He'd done it to Kyo-kun and Yuki-kun before, too... But pouring oil on fires was his gift. He got up quickly and snatched up the kid. "You should make your guess first."

"I swear to God, if you hurt me, I'll never speak to you again." He warned, though he still didn't guess anything.

Shigure pulled him in tighter and nibbled idly on his ear.

"Hush and guess whether I'm keeping you or sending you off to play with bratty little Yuki-kun."

"I don't know, damnit!" He sighed, muscles tense, and breathing fast. "I'm not even sure if I care..."

"You are no fun at all." The dog rolled his eyes. "I'd give you a hint and kiss you, but you're already upset. Can't have you suffocating on me."

"I DIDN'T kiss him." Haru stated one more time, trying really hard to slow his breathing down, but it wasn't working very well.

"I believed you the first time." The writer pointed out gently.

"Then what was with all that?" He wanted to know, offering his boyfriend a frustrated look.

"I like teasing people."

"You don't tease people about that!"

"I tease people about everything." He kissed the tip of the ox's nose. "Because I'm a complete asshole like that."

"You scared me, bastard!" Haru spit, shaking his head, and almost hitting him there. "I should hit you, anyway!"

"If it would make you feel better?" Shigure offered again. "Besides, I meant what I said. I don't want you to miss your chance on my account."

"And I meant what I said." Hatsuharu stated. "I don't want to fuck anything else up."

"Shouldn't you worry about that either way?" Shigure wondered. "You are dating someone, no matter who you choose."

"Well, yeah, but--" But, if he chose Yuki and fucked up, he'd lose two people! It hadn't changed, really. The problem was still the same.

"Yuki-kun is a brat who doesn't deserve you to begin with." His older boyfriend stated finally. If he wasn't worried about Haru's potential death, he would have snogged him senseless right there...

Haru snorted, willing his muscles to relax, practically melting against him.

"I told you, I won't cheat on you."

Shigure groaned happily before taking out his kissing instincts on the boy's neck instead.

"I'm all flattered and stuff." he laughed.

"I should probably explain to Yuki, though..." He realized, blinking a few times, really annoyed with his heavy breathing. "I kinda just walked out on him..."

"Could you calm down while you do that so I can ravish you later?" His lover suggested with a small chuckle. He was sort’a kind’a kidding... Sort’a...

"I've been trying..." Haru admitted. "...For a good three minutes."

"Well, hanging around your irritating boyfriend most certainly isn't helping anything." He grinned. "I need out of this suit anyways." He sighed dramatically. The suit really was bothering him now...

"But you look good in pants." Haru pouted a little, though he still didn't pull away from him.

"Now, now. I wear pants when I'm being a good boyfriend, but I must get back into writer mode so I can tease Mit-chan into suicide." Shigure smiled.

"But, you STILL look good in pants!" He protested a little, but he did pull away, and set off to find his other cousin in the house. This really wasn't going to help his breathing slow down, he just knew it.

Yuki was sitting on the couch, idly berating himself. He felt only kind’a, sort’a, just a bit stupid after doing that.

"Yuki..." Haru called, going back into the room, announcing his presence as he approached.

"Oh." The rat ran a hand through his hair, and that was about all the response the ox got.

"Oh?" Haru raised an eyebrow, but he didn't push it further, and just went to sit with Yuki on the couch. "Look, I'm...flattered that you're finally giving me the time of day. And, a month or two ago, I would have been thrilled. But...I'd be lying if I told you anything other than 'I'm sorry' now."

Be prepared for Yuki's utter pride and brattiness. He looked irritably upon the other. He already felt like an ass, and that was helping.

"Oh," he repeated darkly. "I see. I'm sorry. You're right, I didn't realize how all the thrill would be gone once I actually consented to it!" Then in a mild fit he smacked the younger boy across the face before sulking off. This is exactly what he'd been afraid of...

"What the hell!" Haru looked alarmed, and automatically held a hand over his struck cheek, before getting up to follow him. "You REJECTED me! Again, and again!" He ranted, right on the edge of going Black. "You can't expect me to stand there and play your security blanket, in case your other options bottom out!" He pointed out. "Yes, I moved on. Were you hoping for something else?"

"You talk like that's what I wanted to do." The rat grunted in extreme annoyance. He wasn't going to get worked up about this... He wasn't going to get worked about this... "It wasn't. Now shut up before I smack you again."

"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me." Haru rolled his eyes. "You pull that crap and try to make ME out to be the bad guy?"

"Yes. It's my special skill." Yuki glanced over his shoulder coolly for a moment before continuing on his way.

"Give me a break, Yuki!" Haru called after him. "You kissed me in front of my boyfriend! There is NO way this is my fault!"

One of Shigure's shoes, which were by the door, was chucked in the ox's general direction; then Yuki was out the door and gone. That could have gone better. But the rat was too annoyed and hurt right now to give so much as half a fuck.

Haru dodged the shoe carefully, only to have another coughing fit.

"I'm gonna go home now, Sensei!" He called into the near empty house, trusting the dog to hear him. "Think I might take a nap." He was still feeling really tired. Stupid lack-of-oxygen-induced fatigue...

His lover all but flew down the stairs, glomping him carefully.

"Okay," He crooned, and upon inspecting his reddened cheek, licked it. "Want me to walk you, so you don't get lost?"

"Sure." He agreed, with a small smile. Yuki hadn't needed to hit him...! "Thank you."

"It appears I need to relocate my shoes..." Shigure murmured before going on the great search. It hadn't sounded like Yuki and Haru were getting along too well; but, then again, he wasn't about to admit to eavesdropping,

"It's a little to your left, Sensei." Haru informed him, with a slight sweat drop.

"Methinks lady Yuki doth protest too much." The dog commented idly as he reclaimed his shoe.

"Yuki's being a bitch." Haru stated, speaking up against his cousin for the first time since he was seven years old.

"Oh, quite a mouth on this one." The older man grinned over at him wryly.

"Well, he is!" The ox insisted, rolling his eyes. "Trying to make it look like I'm the one at fault..."

"Lord, I know." Shigure laughed, returning for his other shoe. "He finally works up the nerve to express how he actually feels just to find out I've stolen you, then knowing the way his brain works he feels like a complete fool." He winked at his boyfriend once he had his shoe on. "Of course, that was no reason to smack you. He could have done like any other normal teenager and sulked in his room."

"Sensei, it didn't take him nine years to work up the nerve to kiss me."

"Exaggeration is one of those amazing gifts us writers seem to have."

"Whatever," he shrugged a little. "I'm tired. Can we go home, now?"

"Yes, come on," Shigure urged him, in a teasing voice that he would probably use with a seven-year-old as well.

Haru could deal with being tired; he had to every time he Blacked out and went back. Being THIS tired, on top of being constantly short of breath, was wearing on his nerves REALLY fast.

That's why his nice boyfriend gave him a short kiss, tucked him in bed and then returned to his own home praying the entire time that Yuki didn't kill him.

To be continued…

~“Don’t confuse
Baby, you’re gonna loose your own game
Change me
Replacing the envying
To forget your love…” –Muse (Plug in Baby)~
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