Fushigi Yuugi Fan Fiction ❯ Family Ties Part 2: Children of a Blessed Union ❯ All or Nothing ( Chapter 7 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Chapter VII: All or Nothing

There was something in the air. She could sense it emanating throughout the house. Besides her, no one else had acknowledged it, otherwise they didn't wish to. Miaka was beginning to worry this suffocating tension would not leave for a quite a while.

When Tamahome miraculously found them four days ago, the natural workings of the household was put at ends. Now, two days after the bandit attack, the over-bearing animosity between him and her husband breached a ten-fold. The feeling of the surroundings was the same as it was twenty years ago. Their childish squabbles just matured into silent contempt.

She also noticed that Tasuki was acting especially cold. When it was time to do chores, he would work from morning to dusk, only stopping to eat meals. At night he would sleep facing away from her; his stout back had never appeared so foreboding. It pained her he didn't interact, but it disconcerted her even more when he avoided Takato.

The other morning at breakfast, their son tried to strike up a conversation him. Tasuki was eating his rice and only replied with a vague grunt. She witnessed the flash of hurt in Takato's eyes. Her son tried to recover as he talked with Tamahome. Miaka convinced herself that the reason for her husband's behavior was because of their son's newfound admiration for Tamahome.

This afternoon was no different. Tasuki busied himself with cleaning the stable. Tamahome played with the boys. All the while she tidied up what was left of lunch. Miyu had been put down for her nap, oblivious of her family's plight. Miaka thought of her daughter fondly; at least she was unaffected by the goings on.

After her brief reverie, Sousuke came through the doorway. He strode over to her and clutched her skirts.

“I don't wanna play anymore. Takato an' Uncle Tama only like each other.”

She smoothed his shoulders as he nuzzled her thigh. The poor boy had been left out of the fun since his brother and Tamahome started sharing a common bond. He had tried to be with his father, but Tasuki was too distant even for him. Torn between jealousy and heart ache, Sousuke came to the only neutral ground he knew, his mother.

“Why don't you have a snack?” she suggested. Food always seemed to cheer up her children. “I've got pork buns…”

“Not hungry,” he muttered. He went to his usual spot at the table and held his head in his hands.

Now she was at a loss on what to do now. In her younger days, she had been vibrant and chipper. Her youth had been spent making the celestial warriors happy as they protected her in return. Now it seemed her cheering tactics had depleted. She couldn't even make her own children happy…

Then she had an epiphany; it was simple but always did the trick… She looked back to her sulking son.

“Say, Sousuke, what about you and I go for a swim in the waterhole?”

Miaka smiled as Sousuke shot at attention. “Really, Mama? Ya' mean it?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Alright!” he cried. He, unlike his hydrophobic father, loved swimming. Taking a dip in the water could always put a smile on his face.

Soon, the two were walking hand in hand exiting the house. Takato and Tamahome, who had been play-sparring, caught sight of them. The older brother came rushing toward them. Miaka stopped her stride, but Sousuke hid behind her.

“Where are you goin'?” he asked.

“We're going to the waterhole. Want to come with us?”

But Sousuke began to protest. “No, Mama! I thought it's only you an' me! Don't let him go with us!”

“Mom said I could go!” retorted Takato. “So there!” He rushed back to the house to get something.

Tamahome had been there to witness the tiff. He stood by Miaka as they waited for Takato to return. Sousuke pouted, disappointed that his personal outing had to be shared. His mother tried to compromise, but to no avail. The ogre warrior sent her a look of sympathy.

“Seems the little guy would rather be alone with you,” he joked. He tried to pat the boy's head, but he swerved out of his reach.

“Yes, he and Takato have a tendency to fight for my attention. I try to be fair with them.”

“Almost remind you of two other boys from way back when…” Tamahome looked to the fields.

Miaka looked to that direction also. She spotted Tasuki plowing the soil. His back was bare and slicked with the sweat of labor. Her heart sank at the thought; the only thing she saw of him lately was his back.

“It's just like how we were as children,” she agreed, “I remember, seventeen years ago, how you would both try to win me over.”

“Yeah, I would try coaxing you with proclamations of love, and Tasuki”—

“Would go for a simpler approach and try to convince me through my stomach,” She smiled ruefully. “The dumplings always won out.”

“Though my flowery speeches were able to sway you once we were older…” He referred to the two years they were a couple. That as before the War, before Tasu-chan…

“I always hated those times when you two fought over me,” she confessed. “Even as we got older, you and Tasuki treated me like an object rather than a person.

“It was like I was just another trophy to be won in your rivalry.”

Tamahome's faint smile disappeared completely. “Well, you certainly didn't feel that way when we were together…”

“You can change your opinion as you mature,” she replied.

They stopped talking as Takato came back with drying cloths. Miaka called to the far-off Tasuki to watch over Miyu. He didn't turn to look at her, but he gave a wave. Miaka tried to hide her hurt as she and Tamahome made a part of ways. The ogre warrior looked after her as she and her children walked down the path.

At first the boys wouldn't even look at each other as they walked to the waterhole. Their previous and present quarrels were still fresh in their minds. But once they got there, in the secluded part of the wood, animosities were practically forgotten. Sousuke and Takato both stripped naked, racing to the water's edge.

“Ha ha, beat you! First born, first place!” announced Takato.

“No fair, ya' wore less clothes than me!”

Miaka let out a sigh of relief as she watched her son's backsides shine in the sun. That's what she loved about children. They were so fickle arguments were forgotten at a drop of a hat. She began to strip off her clothes, too. She swam out to a cover of reeds where she could have some solitude but still watch over the boys.

In her cocoon of reeds, she began to reminisce. Her thoughts first focused on her children. Then they drifted to Tasuki. Finally, she settled on something that happened six years ago…

---

The militia had long since gone, taking the Kuto troops with them. Thankfully a large group of inexperienced upstarts were able to bring the enemy away from the palace. Hotohori would be pleased to know his home would still be in tact.

Tasuki fell asleep quickly that night. Miaka couldn't bring herself to close her eyes. Tamahome had left for battle, where a life could end in a mere second. She prayed that Suzaku would bring him back alive somehow.

It had been a full moon. The light gave a dreamlike quality to everything it shined upon. Yet the moonlight was able to cast dark shadows, making an eerie feeling as well. She walked to the window, looking outside. Her eyes caught a swiftly moving shape among the shadows. She dismissed it as the movement of the trees. But the priestess almost shrieked when a large shadow jumped in front of her. Though, upon closer inspection, she almost made a cry of surprise.

It was Tamahome! She quickly unlatched the window and he perched upon her windowsill.

“Tamahome!” she hissed, “I thought you were with the militia!”

Before she could say anything more, he held her to his chest. He sifted his hand through her hair, allowing her to relax.

“I couldn't go off to fight without seeing you one last time.” His look was so intense it made her shiver. “I need to be with you.”

Personal need aside, Miaka panicked as she remembered Tasuki slumbering in her bed. She gestured back to the bed alcove. Tamahome didn't even blink as he began to caress her face. It was hard to fight off his advances, but she tried to resist.

“Tamahome, don't…! Tasuki's …! We can't—!”

She was silenced as her lips were guided to his. All her insecurities seemed to melt away. Their lips melded together, making her warm inside. They enveloped their arms around one another.

It had been a long time since they were able to actually embrace. What was exchanged that afternoon had been rushed. It did not truly consummate their love. War was a lengthy separator; it was capable to keep them apart forever. If they were going to express how they really felt, now was as a good as time as any.

After their insistent kisses, he carried her away to a more comfortable setting, away from prying eyes. A place that was romantic and fitting for such a beautiful night, the palace gardens. There they were able to love each other to the fullest before the sun rose. Then they parted, for the gods knew how long.

---

`Yes', Miaka thought, `that was when…'

A large snap alerted her. She covered her breasts and slinked deeper into the water. Rustling in the reeds grew louder and louder. She was about to call out to the boys, but she was shushed. Taking her chances, she looked back. What she saw caused her to sink into the water up to her neck.

“Tamahome!” she hissed. “What are you doing here?”

The man stood behind the reeds for a long time. He crouched to her eye level so as to not tower over her. His sullen blue eyes looked into her chartreuse ones. He waited until the apprehension drained from her face.

“This has been bothering me for a very long time…” He leaned over to her.

The woman tried to back away, but his hand held the back of her head. She didn't know what came over her. Maybe it was the need to relieve the stress from it all. Or maybe she wanted to see something, too. Miaka leaned into his lips. She let her hands drop from her bare chest.

In the background, Sousuke and Takato could be heard laughing and splashing each other.

In a fortress, far away…

The Rentou bandit hideout was filled with all sorts of vagabonds and scum. There were those whom had been in the game since their youth, others self-taught rookies. Some were extortionists, murderers, mercenaries, rapists, slave traders, sleazy merchants, or former palace guards. Horrible criminals with no where to go; all were fearsome in their own ways. Yet they couldn't kill two puny men.

Rentou's second in command, Tetsuo, was being chewed up by the boss. He sat where trying to look defiant, but the man still cowered at his leader's loud roars.

“I can't believe you, ya' lousy pieces o' shit!” The Boss was a man of great respect. He was talented in many aspects of banditry and had the brains to go with it. “I send ya' out on a raid, an' you crap yer pants when two scrawny villagers decides t' kick yer ass!”

“Well, what do ya' expect us t' do, Boss?” defended Tetsuo. “One of those `scrawny villager' has th' infamous Harisen ya' keep talkin' `bout!”

Tetsuo flinched away when his boss threatened to beat his face. “So what? Th' guy's still flesh an' blood like you an' me! Use something t' make `im stop his assault.”

“Like what, Boss?”

That was when a toothy leer stretched across his face. The Rentou leader had been waiting for his subordinate to ask him that. There was one thing that would make Tasuki hesitate using his tessen.

“Simple, my stupid Tetsuo,” he chuckled, “kidnap one o' his family…”

A mental eternity later, they broke the kiss. The haze cleared as they saw where they stand. Miaka stared at him, and Tamahome stared back at her. It was the moment of truth. That kiss had meant…

…Nothing.

With dreary understanding, Tamahome knew that Miaka's heart was no longer with him. She was staring at him as if nothing had transpired. His own heart sunk into the bowels of a void as he accepted this. Marital loyalty had won out and he had lost. He sat on his haunches as he looked away from her.

“I guess…being married changes things.”

She nodded. “Yes, I guess it does…”

But Miaka wasn't sure if that was the reason at all. Of course being married to Tasuki and having his children were taken into account. It just didn't feel like the reason why she felt so indifferent.

When they had kissed, Miaka was almost taken in by the physical sensation of it. Yet something nagged at the back of her mind. It had not been the fact that she was married with children. There was this feeling of alarm; some notion of shame that tugged at her heartstrings. She couldn't explain what it was. This feeling only reminded her, `There is something else…' At the moment she didn't know what that was, but she did know that Tamahome was not it.

Her arms wrapped around her pale body, and she slinked back into the water. The man beside her ignored her need for chastity. There they sat for another mental eternity, until shrill voices broke through to their ears.

“Mama, Mama! Where are you?”

“Mom! We're getting pruney!”

“You should go,” she suggested, “I don't want my sons to see us this way.” She exited through the reeds.

Sousuke and Takato swam toward their mother when they saw her appear from behind the water grass. They formed a close circle once reunited.

“I'm getting' cold,” complained Sousuke.

Miaka checked the sun. “It's about time for us to head back anyway. What do you say about helping me with dinner?”

Her boys gave a whoop of joy. The three swam for the shore and dried themselves off with the rags Takato brought along. After donning their clothes, the boys raced for home as Miaka lagged behind.

Back at the waterhole, Tamahome waited until they were completely gone. Then he left.

The boys ran ahead while she meandered behind them. They were already reaching the house. She saw Tasuki at the doorway waiting for her. He was holding a sleeping Miyu. When she got there he deposited the baby into her arms. Their gazes met for a moment.

Tasuki appeared weary, as if expecting the worst. He probably knew of Tamahome's disappearance and where he most likely went off to. Miaka tried to silently reassure him. She smiled expectantly, hoping he would understand.

The man must have interpreted her signal as an apology. He looked at her with furious accusation. She, in turn, deduced this meant he figured out what she did behind his back. The need to explain her self was overwhelming.

“Tasuki, wait…” she called. He was already inside the house.

Unrelenting grief filled the void as she heard her sons call out to her. She tried to compose herself as she made the meal with them. Tasuki was more silent and stolid than ever. Miaka almost dropped Miyu since her remorse exhausted her. The boys were oblivious to all this so they just jabbered away. More or less, dinner was a horrid affair.

To be continued…

Author's note: Confused on Miaka getting it on with Tama, and still being a `virgin' when she did it with Tasuki? I'll explain in the reviews; I don't think this is the sort of content to say on public posts. ^^;