InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Big Trouble Comes in Small Packages ❯ What goes up, Must come Down ( Chapter 23 )

Enjoy the new chapter! Miroku and Sango are getting a turn at being the center of attention, so you know what that means...more humor! And perhaps a little romance in the near future...?

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Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, but really, who could claim such a thing? Inuyasha is a free spirit! Well, okay, that was an all out lie. No one could be a free spirit with a necklace like his…but it sounded poetic anyway, right?

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Big Trouble Comes in Small Packages

Chapter Twenty-Three

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As usual, the afternoon shift at Miroku's café was a busy one.

Kagura had her hands more than full, taking orders from all their regular customers who liked to come in for their afternoon tea and a little gossip. And if she wasn't busy taking and filling orders, she was hurrying to clean vacated tables before a new customer arrived, or even manning the cash register when needed. All in all, it was turning out to be one of the most hectic days she'd ever had to suffer through, though it wasn't much busier than average.

Why? Because Miroku was being even lazier than usual, if possible.

Sighing wistfully, Miroku leaned on the counter next to the cash register and gazed out the front windows, though he wasn't looking at anything in particular. He didn't even seem to notice any of the scantily clad college girls that wandered by on their way home from classes, which was extremely strange for someone as perverted as he could be.

But beyond that, the most startling thing of all was the fact that he didn't even seem to notice the death glare Kagura was giving him every time she passed by, something that he was normally terrified of.

"Excuse me?" A middle-aged lady waved a hand in front of unfocused violet eyes, attempting to get his attention after waiting in front of the cash register for several moments. "I'd like to pay for my meal sometime today, young man."

"Hmm?" Miroku's eyes snapped back into focus and he stared at her. "Did you say something?"

The woman frowned in disapproval at his inattention. "I said I'd like to pay for my meal, if you don't mind."

Miroku didn't recognize her as one of his regulars, so he just smiled politely and took her check without making any of his usual small talk. After inputting the total into the cash register, he took the money she handed him and gave her some change in return. "Have a good day, ma'am!"

The woman's eyes widened as she stared down at the money in her hands. She'd only given him 1,000 yen, and he'd given her back over four times that in change! Perhaps he mistakenly thought she'd given him 5,000 yen? What luck!

Looking around furtively to make sure no one else in the café was watching, as well as to make sure Miroku hadn't noticed his mistake, the woman pocketed the money and high-tailed it out of the building as fast as she could go without looking suspicious. Her attempt at going unnoticed was ruined, though, when she nearly mowed down some customers just entering the café.

Miroku never even noticed the commotion.

The thing he DID notice was Kagura slapping him up-side the head hard enough to leave an indentation in his skull.

"What in the world did you do something like that for?" He whined, clutching his head protectively and staring at her with wounded puppy dog eyes. "That hurt, I'll have you know!"

"Good." She glared at him flatly.

"But what did I do?"

Nearly growling at him, Kagura placed the tip of one neatly manicured index finger against the other and started counting off. "One, you just gave that customer back enough change to go eat at that five star restaurant down the street! Two, you've been moping around like a love-sick fool and letting me do all the work, even though we are so busy this afternoon. Three, I just felt like it." She punctuated her last reason with a wave of her hand.

Miroku blinked. "Did I really give that woman so much money?"

In unison, every other person that had been present during the exchange nodded their heads. So much for that woman thinking she got away with the money unnoticed.

Miroku gaped at the crowd. "If everyone saw me do it, then why didn't any of you say something sooner? Or even stop her before she could leave?" Miroku shot a disapproving gaze around the room at everyone as if they had been the ones to do something wrong, obviously trying to save face though it was probably far too late.

Kagura shrugged in response to his question and said what everyone else was thinking. "Why? You deserved it for being so stupid."

Again everyone else in the room nodded, including Miroku's ever loyal fan club of old ladies.

Miroku sighed and drooped his shoulders in defeat, trying to look as pathetic as possible. It was his favorite tactic, attempting to earn some sympathy from the older ladies since he knew it would be impossible to get any from Kagura. "The whole world is turning against me today, and just when I thought things were finally going my way!"

"Give it up!" Kagura tossed a dirty rag at his face before he could continue his dramatics. "Why don't you get off your lazy ass and go clean a few tables for once? I have to get some more orders taken care of. Oh yes, and I'LL take care of the register from now on since you so obviously cannot count…"

"Yes ma'am!" Miroku gave his employee a mock salute before marching off as if he were a soldier heading into battle.

Snorting in disgust, Kagura headed for the kitchen.

Humming happily, the café owner started wiping down the closest empty table and gathering the dirty cups and dishes that had been left there by its previous occupants. He looked as if he were finally somewhere other than in la la land and actually seemed intent on getting some work done. Perhaps Kagura had finally scared some sense into him?

Or, maybe not...

The customers at the tables surrounding him watched with amusement as he took the half empty salt shaker off the table and added it to the pile of dirty dishes he was collecting, along with the pepper shaker and napkin dispenser. He even took the little container of sugar packets.

"Miroku seems a bit distracted today, doesn't he?" One of the older women sitting at a table to his left commented. She was a regular and Miroku knew her quite well. "I've never seen him act like this before, so whatever he's thinking about must be pretty important." Her voice was just loud enough for the man being talked about to hear, but he gave no indication that he noticed.

Another woman nodded her head. "I'm guessing that he has a crush on someone!"

"Oh, I doubt something like that would make him act so absent-minded. Miroku has a crush on almost every girl he knows!"

"But maybe this is a really special girl."

"Like who? That Sango girl?" The owner of the voice sniffed in disdain. "I still don't see why he likes her so much."

At the mention of Sango's name, the formerly absent-in-mind café owner was now paying close attention to the conversation, his dazed look gone. If he'd had ears like Inuyasha, they would have been going crazy as he stood still and strained to hear what was being said, all the while holding an outrageously high mountain of dirty dishes in his arms. One false step and he'd be done for.

"So what do you think could have happened between them to make him act like that?" Another lady joined the conversation.

The first woman with the crush theory giggled like a school girl. "Maybe she told him that she loved him! Or even better, maybe they both confessed their undying love to each other! Wouldn't that be romantic?"

"Would you get your head out of the clouds? He would have told us if something like that had happened."

"Oh, but you know Miroku!" The first lady turned sly eyes to the subject of their discussion. "Maybe he just wants to keep all his options open for later, in case things don't work out between them." She blushed and winked at the gawking Miroku. "Don't worry dear, if you need a time away from your girl, I'll always be here for you!"

This caused a round of laughter throughout the room, and Miroku sweatdropped.

"So, when do you think the wedding is? I'll cry if I'm not invited!"

"They probably haven't set a date yet, but he'd better tell us as soon as they do!"

"Um, excuse me ladies…" Miroku weakly attempted to get their attention, knowing that he should put a stop to their wild imaginings before things got out of control. If Sango ended up hearing any rumors like that about the two of them, she'd kill him!

"Ohhh, I hope they decide to have children right off!"

"Children would be a nice addition to this place, wouldn't they? That little girl his rude friend brings around is so cute!"

"Do you think Sango and Miroku's children would look anything like her? I hope so!"

Miroku raised a hand. "Ladies..."

"I just hope the boys turn out as charming as their father..."

"LADIES!"

As one, all the women in the room turned to look at the shouting man in their midst.

"That's better." Miroku smiled, once again exuding his usual charm. He knew that as long as their attention was centered on him he could easily maintain control of the situation. "I hate to disappoint you, but Sango and I aren't that serious - yet."

One of the women to his right frowned before opening her mouth to speak, but he cut her off.

"BUT I finally got her to agree to a date for the first time (he wisely left out the part about the bet), so we have one planned for tomorrow night." He smiled at all the looks of shock that got sent his way.

"Miroku..."

"Our little Miroku..."

Suddenly all the women squealed like school girls.

"He has a DATE!"

"I can't believe it!"

"I never thought I'd see the day when our little Miroku would have a date! Why, it seems only yesterday that he was in diapers."

They continued to squeal and giggle while stating their disbelief that Miroku actually had a date, conveniently forgetting that they'd practically had him married off only moments before. Miroku could only watch with a mixture of embarrassment and amusement as the whole situation grew out of his control once again. Obviously he didn't have as much control over his fan club as he thought he did.

"So, what kind of date do you think would be appropriate, seeing as it's their first?"

"Oh, good thinking! We can't let him plan something so important on his own!" The speaker made a face of horror, as if it was an idea that shouldn't even be contemplated. "After all, what if he screws up? Then we'd never see what Miroku's children would look like!"

Her expression was suddenly mirrored by everyone else in the room including Miroku, though his was for a completely different reason.

"Now ladies, I really don't think I need help with anything." He raised his hands in a placating gesture. "I was already planning to-"

"Nonsense!" The latest speaker was the woman that always seemed to lead the group. She tended to be a bit pushy, though well-meaning. "We only want to help you and make sure things go well for you on such an important occasion." As if the matter were settled, she firmly set her coffee cup down on the table as if it were a gavel signaling the opening of an auction. "So, any suggestions?"

"I think they should have a romantic dinner by candlelight!"

"Are you sure? That Sango girl might not like that."

The leader sniffed in distain. "If so, then she has no taste. Having a romantic dinner is a first date MUST if you are at all serious about getting to know your date better."

"No, no!" The woman shook her head. "I don't mean that she'll dislike the dinner. I mean that she might dislike being in the dark alone with him! He does tend to take advantage of that a bit."

"And she wouldn't LIKE that? Crazy girl! I'd give anything to be alone in the dark with him!"

Several of the women in the room giggled. "Oh, you are so bad!"

Miroku felt like sinking through the floor and vanishing from the face of the earth. His day, his wonderful, WONDERFUL day that had started off so well and had been so full of promise was going down the drain so fast that is was almost unsalvageable! After all, his date with the girl of his dreams was now at the mercy of a bunch of gossiping old women! And if this date didn't go well, Sango most likely wasn't going to give him a second chance.

Never before had his future looked so bleak.

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"No!"

"Please?"

"For the last time, NO!"

"But Kagome-chan-"

"Sango!" The other girl clamped a hand over her friend's mouth in exasperation. "I said it before and I will say it again. I will NOT go with you on your date with Miroku! You got yourself into the mess, so now you have to deal with it. Maybe it will teach you not to make such stupid bets!" Kagome took a deep breath after finishing her mini tirade before silently adding a bit more in her mind. 'Besides, why would I want to go on your date with you when I'm having such crappy luck right now? Inuyasha is so wrapped up in his own problems right now that he's barely even speaking to me.'

As if she was able to read Kagome's thoughts, a sly look came over Sango's face. "You're thinking about Inuyasha, aren't you?"

"I am not!"

Sango rolled her eyes. "Don't try to lie to me, Kagome-chan. I know you better than that."

"Well..." The shorter girl bit her lip, obviously hesitant to admit anything, though it was obvious that she was trapped. "Even if I was, what does it matter? We were talking about you and Miroku, remember?"

Sango shook her head, managing to look sympathetic and disapproving at the same time. "It matters because you looked so upset. You shouldn't spend so much time thinking about him, you know it will only upset you more. Besides, I'm sure Inuyasha will get over whatever his problem is soon. He's always been rather broody and anti-social. Just because he's not really talking to you right now doesn't mean he hates you."

Kagome sighed. "Yeah, I know."

"You need to get out of the apartment and just have some fun! Forget about school, forget about Inuyasha and his emotional constipation, and just let yourself relax!" She suddenly paused, as if hesitant about something. "You know, Kagome-chan, I was only thinking about you when I suggested that you come with me. I hate seeing you upset about anything, especially a guy. Will you PLEASE come with us? Just for a little while?"

There were a lot of good aspects to Kagome's personality, but when it came to people she cared about, she could be a complete sucker. It was so hard for her to say no when somebody put something like that, and this instance was no exception. Sango obviously knew her friend well.

"Okay, okay. I'll go with you for a while, but when I get ready to leave you have to deal with him by yourself!" She warned.

"Thank you, Kagome-chan!" Sango hugged the other girl fiercely, relieved that she wouldn't have to face the next night completely alone. After all, who knew what kind of tricks that pervert would have up his sleeve? At least when they made the date, the fact that it had to be the two of them alone wasn't specified!

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Poor, poor Miroku. His date plans are looking worse by the moment, aren't they? But who knows, perhaps things will go better than anticipated...Hey, I saw you roll your eyes! Do you really think I would be so cruel to Miroku? Wait, don't answer that! LOL, anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Sorry that I'm taking a short break from Inuyasha and Kagome at the moment, but they'll be back in a chapter or two!