InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Chained ❯ Remember me and Despair ( Chapter 4 )

A\N: More Inuyasha in this chapter-- not much going on (except inside his little head) but there should be some exciting stuff happening in the plot soon enough-- just need to add another character or two to make it thicken up that’s all.

inuyasha cute doggy ears - I’m glad you’re enjoying it so much! But don’t get your hopes up-- I don’t think the battle is quite over yet! ^_~

DISCLAIMER - Don’t make no money off of this and don’t own the inuyasha characters so don’t sue me.   ~*~   Remember me and Despair

Inuyasha stared blankly at the fire, watching as it devoured the logs. It was a habit his master had long ago broken him into.

They both loved the fire -- but for two very different reasons.

Naraku loved fire because of it power, it’s need to devour, so much like his own need. Naraku told him this, once, during one of those moments right before Naraku went to sleep, he would talk to Inuyasha, teach him his theories on life. And Inuyasha would listen, because he couldn’t not. He had been trained to focus on his masters words, and couldn’t not listen or obey them.

So when his master would tell him to sit and listen, when he would talk to him, he would sit and listen.

And Naraku would tell him about everything, why he liked it, or why it was unworthy of existence and how he planned to annihilate it. And fire was one of his favourite things.

But sometimes Inuyasha would develop his own ideas about the things Naraku spoke of.

Like how his master failed to notice that in the end, once the fire ran out of things to devour, it went out as well.

He never told Naraku these things, rarely remembered them himself. It was all just a way of... remaining sane, not loosing his mind completely to the walls that pressed in on it from all sides.

So while Naraku loved the fire for it’s power to destroy, Inuyasha loved it for it’s ability to reincarnate. Not literally-- it brought nothing back to life, but it sometimes managed to break through the walls. And sometimes it managed to show him a glimpse into a life that seemed so familiar and yet he did not recognise.

It was an escape for him, to a place far away and beautiful, with people who smiled and waved at him but he didn’t recognise. He almost always forgot these things later. But when he remembered them, it made him sad, because he couldn’t remember.

He longed to go to these people, but he couldn’t. They were too far away, and the more he tried to go to them, the faster the walls closed in around him.

So he would sit and watch them from afar, staying up late at night after Naraku was asleep, for it was the only time he had that he was safe to do so, and just... stare at the fire, longing for the things it showed him but could not give him.

Longing for the things it made him remember that he couldn’t remember.

He would fall asleep with tears in his eyes and remember nothing of it the next day.

But today he remembered.

He remembered seeing a girl with long black hair, and wide brown eyes dressed in strange clothing. She was hanging on the edge of a wall, staring up at something he couldn’t see, and slowly trying to pull herself out.

Her eyes were wide and filled with concern as she slowly stood to face someone he couldn’t see, who was seemingly standing behind him.

He longed to go to her, to find out what was wrong, but he couldn’t move. He felt a strange amount of shock and concern at seeing her there, feelings he couldn’t register as having anything to do with what he thought he should feel.

“What are you doing here? I told you never to return!” A voice called, familiar and strangely close, yet he couldn’t recognise it.

He put his ears back in confusion and then desperation as the vision began to fade.

‘Wait! Please don’t go!’ He silently begged, but the walls were already closing around him, cutting him off, and Inuyasha was left alone again with nothing but his despair, confusion, and desperately beating heart.

END ~*~  

A\N: Hm. I don’t think I got that quote from the show exactly right. Oh well.