InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ I Do ❯ Chapter 13 ( Chapter 14 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Kagome positioned herself at the very end of the sofa, and took to gazing wistfully out the sliding glass door. After thirty minutes of this, a bored exhaustion washed over her, and she yawned. The city was lit up, outside - a lovely sight - and Kagome hardly noticed that the steady, dull roar of traffic was slowly lulling her to sleep. Drawing her legs to her chest, she rested her chin on her knees and stared sightlessly ahead of her. As at peace as she felt, she couldn’t help but notice the strange, nagging feeling tugging at her otherwise content existence. Kei’s faced appeared periodically in her mind’s eye, and each time she told herself that what she had done - well, it was nothing compared to what Kei had been doing on a regular basis for as long as she could remember. ‘But it’s not what I did,’ she thought ruefully, ‘It was what I wanted to do.’ As if on cue, the door to the spare bedroom opened. Kagome had set it up a few hours ago to allow her hanyou guest to sleep without interruption - apparently, he had not slept as well as she had planned he would.

A shirtless and tousle-haired Inu-yasha emerged from the room, fangs flashing as he yawned. “Kagome?” She blinked three times before glancing at Inu-yasha. “Why are you still up?” He asked, sitting down beside her. Kagome shrugged. “Can’t sleep.” She added, as Inu-yasha continued to watch her questioningly. He didn’t frown, but Kagome couldn’t miss the slight crease that formed between his brows.

“It’s nothing.” Kagome persisted, facing the balcony again. She could feel Inu-yasha’s eyes on her. “You’ve been like this since Souta left. So how about you tell me what the hell is going on?” He shot back gruffly, but not unkindly. Kagome stretched her legs out before her, then climbed to her feet. “It’s nothing.” She repeated, turning towards the couch. Inu-yasha stood as well. “Don’t lie to me.” He said, faintly, almost pleadingly. She had been resisting the urge to simply reach out and touch the hanyou standing before her since he had arrived at her door, but as he took a step closer - the same vulnerable gleam in his eyes as before - Kagome felt what little willpower remained drain from her.

She gazed up into his eyes, and he down into hers. “I would never lie to you.” She whispered, guilt gripping her ever as she spoke. Kagome reached a hand up to brush her fingertips lightly down his cheek. ‘No,’ she thought savagely, ‘I’m too busy lying to myself - and lying to Kei.’ Inu-yasha smiled. Kagome tried to return the gesture - but somewhere along the way, the impulse was lost.

Despite his smile, the crease between his brows darkened. Cocking his head slightly, Inu-yasha gazed at Kagome. Her hand lingered on his face for only a moment more, before it dropped back to her side. Once again, his gaze was rapt, penetrating - as though he were looking in her, rather than at her.

“Come on.” He said after a moment, turning from Kagome and heading towards her bedroom. She watched him make his way down the hall, and then followed - her heart sinking to somewhere in the vicinity of her stomach the entire way.

Standing in the doorway, she felt oddly weak. “Inu-yasha…” She was surprised the word made it over the enormous lump that was now forming in her throat. Kagome watched as the gentle smile slid from his face. She swallowed, turning her gaze downward. Guilt gripped her with iron jaws as Inu-yasha came to her, and tilted her chin upwards. She could no longer avoid his eyes.

“You’re…We…” She continued to struggle through her muddled thoughts, attempting to express to Inu-yasha just what was going through her head - and failing miserably to do so each time. Finally, she closed her mouth, and simply gazed back at Inu-yasha, acutely aware that he still held her jaw gently in his hand.

His amber eyes were still focused intently on her, and she felt her neck go hot. ’Does he ever blink?!’ she thought, frustration rising to the forefront of her multitude of feelings. Glad that they stood in semidarkness, Kagome tenderly jerked her head out of his grip. She stalked past him, eyes burning with tears. ‘What am I even crying about?’ She thought, before she felt a swell of emotion assail her ability to reason.
And there she was, sitting on the edge of the bed, her elbows on her knees, and her face in her hands. Silently, Kagome cried. She could feel the mattress sink, and hear the frame creak ever so slightly. Before Kagome was aware of his presence, Inu-yasha had wrapped an arm around her firmly. They sat in silence for a moment.

Without further adieu, he pulled her hands away from her face. Holding her tear-soaked hands in his, they continued to sit in a silence heavy with unspoken words - for neither dared to speak their worries and frustrations aloud. He didn’t ask what was wrong. He didn’t panic, or beg her to stop- as Kagome knew he would’ve, long ago. He let her bury her face in his shoulder, until, eventually, the tears stopped.

Kagome felt her face burn with embarrassment as she lifted her head, and mopped her tears away. She tried to pull away, but Inu-yasha brought his other arm around her, and embraced her. Kagome wanted nothing more than to be able to hold him without regret, but something in her whispered of her future, her life her - and it took the image of Kei. Kagome tried again to distance herself from him. “Stop.” He murmured as she struggled against him, awkwardly.

She stopped.

She had emptied herself of her guilt-ridden tears, and suddenly, she was so very weary. She fought the drowsiness as best she could, but after a few moments of warmth, of comfort - she could hardly keep her eyes open. “I’m tired.” She admitted a little too loudly. Inu-yasha showed no signs of relenting his hold on her. “Me too.” He said, simply; and before Kagome knew it, they were laying down beside one another. Inu-yasha kept her close the entire night - and Kagome realized with another wave of self-reproach, that she did not mind his arms around her, or her head resting comfortably on his bare shoulder.

Only once that night did Kagome stir. She awoke, groggy and warm. She felt content to simply lay there until the end of time - that is, until she remembered where she was, and who happened to be lying with her.

Turning over, she peered at Inu-yasha, who was still very much asleep. His features were drenched in shadow, but Kagome did not need to see him to know the perfection that reside beside her. Even the human blood that coursed through his veins did little to blemish the beauty he possessed. His mouth, his nose - so alike to his brother; so alike to his father. Demons. The word beset her mind with a horde of questions. Even if they could be together - so many things, even fate itself, was pit against them, would always be pit against them.

Inu-yasha would live long after she would die. And where would they be, then? Kagome grimaced. The thought of death aside, what of their lives? Surely, if he stayed there, in her era, he would be forced to transmute into an entirely different person. There would be so many things he would need to be accustomed to. Kagome’s head began to spin at the thought of it all. And if they returned to his era? Would he be the next in line, the lord-in-waiting? Or would Sesshoumaru take a mate? Kagome almost laughed at the prospect. The questions and thoughts and strange images came, one after another, until Kagome found herself thinking of their most recent encounter with Inu-yasha: up against her front door.

The constant guilt that had been plaguing her dwindled, until she could no longer think of Kei. She would give herself willingly to Inu-yasha. More than willingly, happily! But then what would remain? They would lie together, as nothing more than man and woman - but they would awake, always, as hanyou and human.

Kagome gazed at Inu-yasha, sadly, and then attempted to push his arms away from her. His eyes opened slowly, and he gazed down at her, with an inscrutable expression on his moonlit features. Startled, Kagome stopped moving. “Let me go.” She muttered, her voice evidence enough that she had been staring at him long before he had awoke. After she could take no more of his relentless, ocher eyes, she closed her eyes. She felt foolish, but was relieved that she no longer had to endure his gaze. When had Inu-yasha learned to speak so effectively without words? Surely not while in her presence. Inu-yasha had been inept at hiding more than a frown when she had known him.

Hanyou and human. ‘What other rifts would we need to cross, now that he’s changed so much?’

“Let me go.“ Kagome reiterated, as a sharp pain gripped her chest. It was a while before she realized she was feeling sorry for herself. Inu-yasha did not shake his head, blink, speak - nor acknowledge her comment in any way. Kagome knew the answer regardless. For the second time that night, tears burned in her eyes. Inu-yasha brought his face to hers, slowly, slowly - and then his lips were on hers. A light, ephemeral brush of tender flesh, and then the contact broke . “I can’t let you go,“ He murmured hoarsely, his mouth so very near to her lips, “You know I need you.”

It felt as though she had been thrown into a void. Dark, interminable - falling, with no hope of being caught. Always, and never, she was falling. Kagome didn’t speak, certain that her voice had abandoned her. She merely allowed Inu-yasha to pull her more tightly to him; and there in his arms, she fell back asleep, the fictional wind rushing past her ears.

Outside, a car door slammed.

Ree: Hm. This story could go many ways from here. I’m in the process of debating where I want to take it, exactly, so excuse me if my updates have been a bit few and far between lately. Juggling school, homework, a social life, and this isn’t the hardest task out there, but it’s certainly not easy! Regardless, I do hope you enjoyed the chapter. And, of course, I’d love to hear from you. Tastefully written flames are always welcome, along with advice. Thanks for sticking with me this far, folks. :]