InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Sod's Survival house (OF HELL!) ❯ Week2-Day11-Thursday ( Chapter 11 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Hello people, I decided I'll finish this story before doing anything else. I would to thank the reviewers, I hope you like it!

Disclaimer: YES! I OWN INUYASHA AND RANMA! MUHAHAHAHA *Wakes up from dream* I knew it would be too good to be true!

Chapter 11: Week2-Day11-Thursday

7:00 a.m.

"Yawn!" yawned Ranma. He walks over to Sango, `That Ryoga, he snuggles up into anyone he can find!'

"BWEEE!" squealed P-Chan or Ryoga to be specific.

"You can be so stupid sometimes, eh Ryoga?"

"BWEEE!" squealed P-Chan as he jumped onto Ranma, attacking him.

"DON'T HURT YOU J@CK@$$!" yelled Sango as she whacked him with her boomerang.

"What'd you that for!" yelled Ranma.

"For hurting little P-Chan!" yelled Sango.

"Will you two stop it!" yelled Inuyasha.

"Well he started it!" yelled Ranma pointing at the pig.

"BWEEE!" P-Chan squealed in disagreement.

"I'm out of here!" yelled Ranma.

7:30 a.m.

After eating breakfast, everyone sat down to watch TV.

"I wonder what's on the news?" asked Kagome as she changed the channel.

"MASS DISTRUCTION IN TOKYO!" yelled the announcer.

"This can't be good." said Ryoga.

"It seems 2 masked letches have been stealing women's underwear all over Nermia!"

"Why am I not surprised?" asked Ranma.

"We have a clip of them recorded by Hiroshi and Daisuke."

---The clip---

"Miroku, you're the best disciple ever!" said the old man.

"I'm nothing without my master Happosai!"

"What the, get that camera out of my face!?" yelled Happosai.

---End clip---

Ryoga and Ranma nearly choked.

"Guys, we have to pick up Miroku, wherever he is?" said Sod.

"Didn't you just watch the news?" asked Inuyasha.

"I don't watch the news!"

"Whatever."

"Before you guys leave, we have two questions from the watchers." said Sod.

Dear Fluffy,

Do you miss making out with Jaken?

From,

dead2daworld

Everyone looks at Sesshomaru.

"That's a hard one, a little." Everyone looks at fluffy funny.

"Ok...the 2nd one." said Sod.

Dear all the guys.

Would u rather A) Look at porn B) Stare at Kagome in her underwear C) be tenderly loved by Kikyo or D) Beat up Jaken and Shippo.

From,

JAKENLOVER

"All but C!" yelled all the guys, except Shippo who has "amnesia".

"YOU PERVERTS!" yelled all the girls.

"Why not C?" asked Kikyo, and all the girls fell down anime style.

"But you guys can only choose one." said Sod.

---The guys' replies---

Inuyasha: B, real is better.

Miroku would 100% choose A.

Shippo: Why am I here?

Sesshomaru: D, it'll never get boring.

Naraku: I have enough porn hidden in my cookbooks, did I just say that? You guys are gonna cut that out right? Right?

Kouga: B...*drools*

---Back to the real world kiddies! ---

"It's about time we pick up Miroku." said Kouga.

"And you care because?" asked Inuyasha.

"I miss hurting him."

"LET'S GO!"

8:00 a.m.

"Hard to believe we'll actually take that letch home." said Kagome.

"Well, you guys did sign the contract." said Sod.

"Yea, but I'm glad that letch is gone." said Sango.

"LIKE I SAID YOU SUCK AT BLACKJACK!" yelled Inuyasha?

"YOU CHEAT!" yelled Kouga.

"It's not cheating, it's called you suck."

"I bet you my collection of Kagome's bras you can't beat me again!"

"What do you mean by "collection of Kagome's bras"?" asked Kagome.

"Uh...Nothing." they both replied.

"Kagome, what's this?" asked Shippo in his little kid voice, as he handed her a brown bag.

"Who does it belong to?" asked Kagome.

"Kikyo, it's long, rubbery, and battery powered." Kagome's face froze. Sango looks into the bag.

"Shippo, isn't it naptime?" She said as she picked up Shippo and walked away from the bow.

"What're you doing with my...toy?" demanded Kikyo, as the wolf and Dog sniffed the bag.

"Shippo found it..." replied Kikyo.

"Kagome, Kagome, Kagome."

"WHA?" asked a confused Kagome.

"If you wanted it so bad, all you have to do was ask!"

"Shippo found it! He just wanted to ask me what it was!"

"You don't have to make up lousy excuses!"

"You don't get it don't you!?"

"I get alright!" said Kouga.

"What do you mean?" asked Kagome.

"I mean, if you wanted it so bad, you could've asked me..." Kouga was thrown off the side of the boat.

"I definitely so that one coming" said Inuyasha.

9:00 a.m.

"We're here!" yelled Ranma.

"I thought the bathroom was here!" yelled a lost and confused Ryoga.

"You're in the closet! Besides we're here."

"Let's go!" yelled Ryoga as he headed the opposite direction of the exit.

"You're already going the wrong way!"

9:30 a.m.

"We're home!" yelled Ranma.

"Ranma, you're back already!" said Kasumi.

"Yea, besides, we've come to pick up Miroku." replied Inuyasha.

"Somebody called my name?" asked Miroku.

"There you are we have to go!" said Kagome.

"But we like it here!" yelled Miroku.

"WE?" asked Kagome.

"Nabiki seems to like making money off his fortune telling." said Akane.

"Figures!" said Inuyasha.

"Well, it's time we head back." said Kagome as she began to drag Miroku out the door.

11:00 p.m.

After dragging Miroku away, they all arrive home. Sorry if I'm lazy, but try waiting for the enemy for days, laying low until you get to shoot!

"Ok guys, you have 7 questions, so why don't you sit down." said Sod.

"Dear Naraku,

Were did you learn to cook?

From,

doggy ears are cute.

"AHHHH! NOT HIM!" yelled Inuyasha.

"Ok...well, when I was Onigumo, living with the bandits was bad, I mean it! They didn't know how to cook, so I stole this cookbook from Betty Crocker herself," holds up book, "I loved the book and it seems cooking is fun, plus I once poisoned them, stole the loot, and was riding my horse away along with 100,000 dollars! But I didn't see where I was going, so I went right off a cliff. It was sad; I broke almost every bone in my body. That's how I learned to cook, and I met Kikyo." said Naraku.

"Here's letter number 2.

Dear Fluffy,

What Shampoo/Conditioner do you use, because my hairs getting dry?

From,

doesitreallyfuckingmatter"

"It's a secret." replied Sesshomaru.

"jackel 101 asked 5 questions.

1) Dear Fluffy, how many times a day DO u look at Jaken while horny?

"About a hour." replied Inuyasha.

"I thought you said you'd never tell!?" yelled Sesshomaru.

"That was before you stole my pork chops!"

"Feh!"

"You said you'd never use my word!"

"That was before you told everyone my secret!"

"FEH!"

"Ok..." said Sod.

2) Dear Kouga, you look gay, so y don't u admit that u are?

"I'm not gay!" yelled Kouga.

"No need to deny it" said Inuyasha. The two start attacking each other in a cloud of dust.

3) Dear Naraku, guy or girl porn?

"A little of both." said Naraku.

"I don't even want to know anything else!" yelled Sod.

4) Dear Shippo, how much do you really know?

"HUH?" asked Shippo, `How to blackmail, embarrass people, and how to show up during the worst time on purpose.'

"If he didn't have amnesia, it'll probably "how to blackmail, embarrass people, and how to show up during the worst time on purpose"." Kagome answered for Shippo.

5) Dear Sango, does Miroku's groping always make u so horny and would you like to come home with me?

"No," said Sango, `Yes...*Perverted thought goes through mind*...', "And no..."

"I think I'm gonna puke!" yelled Sod.

"Dear Inuyasha/Kagome,

If you don't love each other then why doesn't Kagome go with Kouga, other than him being gay?

From,

lady crappula

"Uh...Kouga is...how do you say? Perverted, that's the word!" replied Kagome. The cloud of dust clears and Kouga looks at Kagome shocked.

"That's right, besides, if you haven't noticed, we seem more friendly then the rest of the cast." said Inuyasha.

"..." Kouga seems to be shutting down.

"I'm gonna skip the 5th one because it's just plain stupid. Here's the 6th one.

Dear, Inuyasha, you and Kouga deserve each other, since your both gay looking then u d be perfect together! So why aren't you and Kouga together?

From,

lovesu2much

"Because, unlike you, we aren't perverts!" yelled Inuyasha.

"I'm gonna kill you!" yelled Kouga.

"Prepare to die!" They both yelled as they ran out the door, only to hit the screen door and be knocked out instantly.

"DEAR THE GIRLS, WOULD YOU RATHER, A)HAVE A SLEEPOVER B)PRACTICE BLOW JOBS FOR YOUR MEN C)EAT PICKLES D)KISS EACH OTHER E)MODEL YOUR UNDERWEAR FOR THE GUYS OR F)FIND AND LOOK AT NARAKU'S GAY PORN"

"A!" they all replied, but thanks to our mind reading machine, it proves that they want all of them, they want to have a sleepover, and at the sleepover, do B, C, E. and F?

"Well, that's all for know, please excuse me while I go puke!" said Sod. Everyone else stared at the cameraman, and then turn on the TV.

12:00 p.m.

"There is so much mail, that there won't be a Q&A thing for a little while." Sod said to the camera, now back to the show. The guys are sleeping, the girls are sleeping...

"Ok guys, I want you guys to play paintball games outside!" yelled Sod.

"Been there done that." replied Sango.

"Yes, but it'll be against my men, and me…MUAHAHAHAHA!"

"Tell me again, why did I join this show?" Sango asked Kikyo.

"Money remembers? Money…"

---Outside---

"Ok, it'll be a 50vs50, I'll have some of my men help you guys." said Sod.

"It's a capture the flag game basically." explained a man.

"Get ready…GO!" Everyone ran out the door. "Did I mention, your dignity is on the line?"

"AY CARAMBA!" replied Inuyasha.

12:30 p.m.

---A charred battlefield---

"We need reinforcements!" yelled Miroku. The Staff's have laid a trap. Miroku, Inuyasha, Naraku, and Sesshomaru had walked right into it. The four were pinned down behind the pool house.

*BAM* a shot went off nailing a paintball right into Naraku's head. The number of men is Contestants: 35, Staff: 46. 7 C's shot all 9 S's and helped the remaining 3 C's. The 10 regrouped with the team.

"Alright men, we need to evacuate this area." Inuyasha said as he pointed towards the map, "Scouts reported seeing Sod here." he pointed to the waterfall. "We leave at 300 hours and surround the men around the springs, use the MG nests to our advantage, and strike their armory, if we can hold it; the men will eventually lose." he continued, "Any Questions?"

"Yea, since when were you a field marshal?" asked Miroku.

"I cannot tell you that."

"He watched war movies nonstop before we got here." Kagome whispered.

1:00 p.m.

C: 35, S: 37.

The men were attacked by the S. The S gained more and more ground as C began to evacuate.

"LET'S GET THE F*** OUT OF HERE!" yelled Kouga.

1:30 p.m.

The men appeared at the springs.

"What idiots, leaving this place lightly defended." said Miroku.

--------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------

"What idiots, falling for my trap." said Sod.

"Alright, Paterson, Griffin, follow me." said Inuyasha, "Alpha squad and Beta squad will secure checkpoint Charlie, and Bravo. Delta will take position Alpha as soon as we've checked out the Armory."

"Yes sir!" Patterson and Griffin said in unison.

"Move out." The three walked out into the shed.

"Area secure." said Griffin and Delta squad came out.

*BAM*

"Griffins hit!" yelled Patterson.

"YES, NOW I CAN WATCH T.V.!" yelled Griffin.

"Dude, you're dead remem…*BAM*" Paterson hits the dirt.

"KOUGA'S DOWN!" yelled Kikyo.

"YAY!" yelled everyone.

"HEY!" Kouga yelled back.

"Too bad, you're dead, so be quiet!" replied Kikyo.

"We are in position." radioed some guy you don't care about.

2:00 p.m.

C: 32 S: 37

The entire S army popped out of the woods and attacked.

---The creek, checkpoint Charlie---

"HOW THE F*** DID WE GET INTO THIS M…" Sango's hit in the head. Paintball after paintball shoots from on side to the next. Alpha Squadron was soon surrounded.

"HELLS FROZEN, I REPEAT HELLS FROZEN!" yelled Sesshomaru.

---In the air---

Shippo, as a…big bird…flies overhead to the creek. "This is big bird, starting bombing run." Shippo/bird thing flies overhead and drops hundreds of water balloons onto the creek. All the men were completely soaked, but at least they took the enemy down with them.

C: 24 S: 19

---The "abandoned" MG nests, checkpoint Bravo---

"Area secure." said Miroku. Suddenly men popped out of nowhere. Naraku went down. The S took three of the nest, and the trench. Miroku and 7 of his men took cover and threw a grenade out the opening. 3 S's went down, but they threw in a "frag" followed by a smoke. The frag "killed" 5 men and the S's went in to mop up.

---The Armory, checkpoint Alpha---

C: 16 S: 14

Delta Squadron was having the most trouble.

"TAKE COVER!" yelled Kikyo. All the men ran behind sheds, crates, and trees. They took the mortars and fired at the enemy. A grenade went in and knocked out 3 people, and the C's were flanked. Mortars were rendered useless, many weapons destroyed, but they had they most powerful weapon with them, their fighting spirit.

---Kid at home watching---

"WHO THE F*** WRITES THIS STUFF!"

"*KTTH* BB! I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!*KTTH*" radioed Sod, and BB ran for his life.

---A CHARRED BATTLEFIELD---

3:00 p.m.

C: 7 S: 7

There they were, seven on each side, Inuyasha, Shippo, Jeffery, John, James, Jack, Jorge, and uh…kick…kick…"Kikyo?"...oh well, who cares, squared off against Sod's staff. Then the first shot was fired. In the end, the score was C: 2, S: 1.

"Wait a second, where's Sod?" asked Inuyasha.

"Who's Sod?" asked Shippo in a clueless fashion.

"Shippo, drop the act." replied Inuyasha. Shippo holds up Inuyasha's diary with the lock broken.

"Oops, I forgot, you have amnesia!"

"I thought so…"

"Well, let's find Sod."

"I think I saw him on the waterfall."

"Good Shippo." Inuyasha petted him.

"The ears?" replied Shippo.

"Scratch your own ears." Inuyasha replied coldly. Shippo hold up the diary.

"GOOD SHIPPO!" Inuyasha forced a smile while scratching Shippo's ears.

---The waterfall---

"That's it, I'm shooting them." said Sod, "Where are they?" *Crack* Sod gulped.

"This is personal." said Shippo. Sod holds up Shippo's diary with his left hand, while holding a copy of Inuyasha's diary.

"Let's just say we put up a good fight, but your brother saves you in the end?" asked Inuyasha. Sod reads the diary.

"*Ahem* April 14th, 1999 in Kagome's time. I can't believe Kagome ran out of shampoo, now I'll never get to…want me to read more?" asked Sod.

"No…" Inuyasha replied. Shippo rolls on the floor laughing.

"*AHEM* April 29th 1999 in Kagome's time. I pulled the funniest prank today. I pretended to be Inuyasha, and told Inuyasha I loved her, and when Inuyasha came back, she asked him if it was true, but he had no idea what she was talking about. Now Inuyasha's getting b****slapped." Inuyasha gets really pissed.

"THAT WAS YOU!" yelled Inuyasha as he chased Shippo. Inuyasha and Shippo were then hit with paintballs in the head.

"Now that you've lost, let's think of a…PUNSHIMENT…MUAHAHAHAHA *Ring, ring*" Sod picks up the phone, "MOM! I TOLD YOU, I'M NOT GONNA SEE MY PSYCIATRIST TODAY!" Inuyasha and Shippo stares. Sod holds up the diaries."

"Well, time to go back to the house!" they both said as they ran home.

4:00 p.m.

"Well, it's been decided on by the reviewers, it's all tied, I asked my friends at school and I've decided to mix it all together and have hell break loose, AGAIN!" yelled Sod.

"So, we'll start with Shippo getting the thrown." said Shippo. Everyone looks at Shippo, holds up diaries…

"Then we'll…"said Sod.

"COMMAND YOU TO BE A CONTESTANT!" yelled Shippo.

"WHAT?" yelled Sod.

"I'm in control so, you'll have to live here." said Shippo as he leaves the room with two body guards.

4:30 p.m.

"Wait a god damn second, THAT'S SOD?!" yelled Miroku.

"Well duh, what'd think he'd look like?" replied Inuyasha.

"Well, NOT LIKE THAT!"

"Hey, I'm just a 16 year old boy." replied Sod, haven taken off all of…my…gear…

"Well, Inuyasha, you and Shippo were the only one to see him." said Miroku.

"Ok, so next, we throw girls into bedroom with Miroku for10 minutes, starting…NOW!" said Shippo.

"WAIT A SEC…" yelled the girls but they were thrown in. Screams were heard.

4:40 p.m.

"This had better help the ratings." said Kikyo.

"I agree." agreed Kagome.

"Ah, come on, it wasn't so bad." said Sango. Everyone stares, "I'm traumatized, what' you expect?"

"Well, time to throw you all into the pools." said Shippo, "Oh yea, Sod."

"What?"

"Where's the magazines?" asked Shippo, everyone stares at Sod.

"Top self, cabinet "A" category "Entertainment", sub category "Magazines", you'll find it."

"Thanks, I always wondered how to beat level 6!"

"Nintendo Power, what' you think it was?" asked Sod. Everyone sweat drops.

5:00 p.m.

"Here are the pools." said Sod.

"So we all jump in and lose what ever little bit of dignity we have left?" asked Naraku.

"Yup." replied Sod. Everyone jumps in.

5:30 p.m.

Note: All guys are girls (G) and all guys are girls (B). (G) = Girl, (B) = boy, remember that!

After making it back, the cast, with their new "member", sit in a circle.

"So this is what it feels like to be a girl." said (G)Sod.

"So how long to be have to stay like this?" asked (G)Miroku.

"Till the end of the show, or if you get evicted." replied (G)Sod.

"Well, at least, how long will Shippo be in power?" ask (G)Miroku.

"A weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!" yelled (G)Sod.

"Hey, no wonder Miroku does it so much!" said (B)Sango while being stared at.

"I think I'll be in the bathroom." said (G)Sod.

"And what'll be doing?" asked (B)Kagome.

"I've been curious about something, be back in about 15 minutes."

"Yea, I call bathroom after." said (G)Inuyasha.

"ME TOO!" yelled (G)Miroku

"Then me" said all of the guys turned girl.

8:00 p.m.

After 2 and a half hours of um…mater…um…yea...they all sit in a circle.

"Ahh, life is good." said (G)Sod.

"Yup." replied all the "guys".

"Now, it's time to enjoy your last day in the house." said Shippo.

"Wah?" replied (G)Naraku.

"The weather machine thing, now you'll be out for three days, so I'll use 3 settings on the machine." said Shippo.

"And they are?" asked (G)Sod.

"Day 1, burning hot sun, day 2, snow, and day 3, hurricane." said Shippo.

"Now this is what I'd expect from you."(G)Inuyasha said to (G)Sod.

"Well, uh yea." replied )G)Sod.

"Now what do we do?" asked (B)Kikyo.

"I know! TRUTH OR DARE!" said (B)Kagome.

8:30 p.m.

"So, Sod truth or dare?" asked (G)Miroku.

"Truth." replied (G)Sod.

"What is your real name?"

"Lee Nguyen*Not my real name, besides, I'm not even 16*"

"HAHAHAHAHA!" Everyone laughed.

"Well, Inuyasha, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you get the beer from the pantry and PARTY!"

9:00 p.m.

The whole house is full of drunks, even Sod, but he's licensed.

"How come I can never have fun like this?" asked Shippo. "Oh well, I'll just set the Hurricane to 120mphs, heat to 120 degrees Fahrenheit, and -30 degrees Fahrenheit for the snow, MUAHAHAHAHAHA! Man no wonder Sod loves torturing us."

--------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------

I'm done for the chapter YAY! Well, tomorrow everyone will wake up with a hangover and more things happen.

REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW, or else I'll go back to playing America's Army.

REMEMBER.

I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!