Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ What am I to you? ❯ Chapter 3 ( Chapter 4 )

 

Naruto scrubbed himself. He was trying to get all the taint Sasuke had put on him off of him once again. The white bubbly sponge fell out of his shaky, soapy hands and into the pool of water below in the bathtub, which he stood in.

He shut his eyes and tried to steady his hands. They were shaking so hard. He leaned his forehead against the warmed tiled wall and gulped down the sobs that wanted to escape his mouth. The water flowing from the shower head rained down on him, the water gathered in the bottom tainted red from blood.

He would get through this. It wasn't going to rule his life. He was strong, stronger than this. His eyes reopened and he captured his face into his hand before he hummed to himself. Yeah, he would pretend as if nothing happened.

For some reason, he couldn't remember how he got in the hospital and what happened during the fight with…with him. He pounded a fist into the wall creating a fist print through it. How many times had he broken his promises to Sakura?

But…he didn't know yet if he brought back Sasuke or not. He reached down to the tap nuzzle, which was between the other two faucets, and turned it to its right so that the shower head stopped spilling water on him.

His stomach growled, he laughed and thought of feeding his belly. He climbed out of the tub, letting water off of his body to drip on the floor. His sapphire orbs caught that but he just rolled them. The floor would dry by itself. He didn't have time to wipe it dry.

A misty mirror greeted his face after he went to the sink. He pushed his hand forward and brushed his palm on it trying to clear out the mist that he could make out his image in the mirror. His nape hair stood up. What the hell? What was Neji doing here? Naruto really didn't want a pity party at the moment. Kakashi might have told him what happened in the hospital.

Naruto had the knock coming and he was ready for it. The person rapped their knuckles on his door.

“Coming!” he yelled, even though he wasn't really enthusiastic to go answer it. He left the bathroom, went to his closet, and threw on yellow, faded jeans and a white, blank t-shirt.

Neji was an easy person to get rid of as long as someone pushed the right buttons. He strolled to the door whistling with his hands shoved in his pockets, he wrung the door open, and plastered a fake smile on his unmarred face.

“Hey,” he greeted the other person.

“Naruto…” Neji said his name as though he just heard it.

Naruto placed his hip on the door jamb, looking into Neji's pale eyes. “What's up?”

“You are okay?” Neji asked slowly.

Naruto rolled his eyes. “Yes, otherwise I wouldn't be standing here, would I now? Look Neji, I was busy with something. Maybe next time you can come by so we can talk and catch up.” He really didn't want to hurt his friend's feelings with harsh words so he will keep it simple to being polite.

Neji crossed his arms over his chest. Looked like he wasn't leaving soon.

“Can I come in for a cup for coffee?” he asked in his Hyuuga politeness.

Naruto frowned at him. “Did you not hear any word that just came out of my mouth seconds ago?”

“I did but this won't take more than fifteen minutes,” Neji insisted.

Naruto looked at him and sighed letting him in. What would kill him anyway? If the Hyuuga brought up the rape then he would kick him out of his home. Simple. He didn't want the whole village knowing that he was raped.

That was so plain embarrassing. It hurt that he had been raped and by his best friend. But, he was trying to get people to look at him and recognize him as Naruto, not the demon inside of him. Now if word got out about the rape, people would give him looks of pity.

He hated pity. He preferred people's hatred towards him than pity. Naruto closed his door, passed the living room, and went into the kitchen to make his guest a cup coffee.

“Naruto, I haven't seen you for a while?” Neji appeared by the kitchen's entrance looking at the blond man filling the kettle with water by the sink.

Naruto glanced at him and shrugged his shoulders.

“I have been busy with stuff…,” he said without care and covered the kettle once it was full and took it to the stove. He then turned on the stove.

“What kind of stuff?” Neji watched him and put his hands on both sides of the entrance to the kitchen.

Naruto turned around and moved to the counter leaning his back on it.

“This and that. Very boring that you wouldn't be interested in it. So what brought you here apart from being Mr. Detective?” he changed the subject.

“I have seen you on my shifts.” Neji didn't break the eye contact.

Naruto cracked up laughing, looking down at his glimmering, gray cemented floor. “Oh, yeah! I overdo the training. Man, I want to be Hokage and to have that title I have to get strong…” He flexed his biceps.

“Naruto don't lie to me!”

Naruto looked up at his friend and his eyes widened.

Neji swallowed and averted his gaze to the steaming kettle. “Naruto you once told me that I can change my destiny. But…what you have been doing has been speaking the alternative. Aren't you being a little hypocritical?”

Naruto's eyes dilated.

“You have been doing duties for Sakura, neglecting your true friends. She has hurt you numerous of times but you were so caught on to the purpose of serving her even though it could cost your life. Naruto, if I can change my destiny, can't you change yours?” Neji asked him.

The kettle whistled, making Naruto jump.

He smoothly opened the upper cabinet and pulled out a breakable cup. Naruto wasn't a coffee person but when Sasuke left, a lot of things changed about him. Life wasn't like it used to be. He couldn't sleep and he had missions in the morning. Therefore, he started to drink coffee. That was why he had it lying stuck in his cabinet.

He was about to open the container of sugar when Neji stopped him.

“Don't put sugar in it,” he said.

Naruto didn't and carried the cup to him. He backed away and went back to his post about the counter.

“I'm sorry. I must have been blinded by love. Neji, I love her so much that I would do anything for her. I-I can't let her go.”

“She doesn't want you but the Uchiha,” Neji uttered every word as if annoyed by them.

Naruto nodded sadly. Yeah, it was true. The truth hurt. She didn't love him but Sasuke. Naruto never really thought about that but of the result for him if he ever brought Sasuke back home that she would come to love him.

“Do you know what happened during the battle with Uchiha?” Neji slowly questioned.

Naruto looked down, his eyes now distant. “No…”

“Hn. I'm not going to lie to you, Naruto, but to tell you the truth.” Neji neared the cup to his lips and sipped some of the coffee. He removed it from his mouth and held the cup in between both his hands.

“I arrested Haruno with an accusation of killing Sasuke Uchiha.”

Naruto gasped. “W-what?” he bit out.

“You killed Sasuke Uchiha. I accused Haruno of the crime.” Neji looked down at the black liquid.

Naruto squatted down slowly and rubbed his face. He fiddled with his shaking hands.

“Wow, I killed him, huh?”

“With a reason, I doubt for you to kill someone without it. So what did Uchiha do to you?” Neji drank some of the black, sugar free liquid in his cup.

Naruto got up abruptly. “Your time is up.”

Neji gulped down all of his drink, finishing it and put the cup down on the counter. “I still have more 2 minutes.”

“Do you know that you arrested an innocent person on a whim of personal revenge? Gee, man, this is my life and I can live with the consequences. You are going to lose your title as a captain of ANBU squad.” Naruto paced around the kitchen cupping his mouth in both his hands.

“I don't care if they kill me but I can't let them kill her.”

“They can't kill you,” Neji told him.

Naruto stopped in his tracks and glanced at his friend. “W-what?”

“You are a weapon Naruto and they need you. A punishment would do but not murder,” Neji explained.

Naruto pointed a shaky hand at him. “You did this on purpose, didn't you? You hurt Sakura trying to help me. You knew that I wouldn't give myself away because if I did then the counselCouncil would take your title of captain away from you for conspiring against an innocent and lying to the Hokage.”

Neji shrugged and put his chin on his interlocked long fingers. “Naruto, don't take this the wrong way but I was being a friend when I did so.”

Naruto laughed and dropped his hand, his eyes staring on the floor.

“Yeah, now I'm really beginning to wonder if I know the meaning of that simple word at all. I mean, I…I had everything going good until all of the sudden something happened and-and I lost it all.”

Neji knew that his time was up and that he should tell Naruto that Hokage wanted to see him but Naruto seemed like he wanted to talk about whatever was on his mind. So, he stood there and listened.

“…I guess that's the way life is.” Naruto sniffled and moved his palm across his face before he looked up and into his friend's eyes. “I need to be able to deal with my downs with the same spirit I use when I'm happy.”

What could he tell him, that wearing a mask was wrong? That would sound wrong coming from him. Neji watched as Naruto squatted on his feet. Neji walked to him and didn't continue further at Naruto's next words.

“Don't you dare come near me, Neji,” Naruto said a in a cold tone. “I won't do it okay. I won't tell on you. I give you my word. I won't even mention that I know about the arrest, okay. Now get out of my house.”

Neji frowned and turned away giving him his back. “Uzumaki, Lady Hokage wants your presence at once.” Friendship between the two was gone at the moment until one decided to fix it.

Naruto could sense the hostility coming from the other male but it was for the best. He didn't want Neji to ever sacrifice his job or anything vital to him in order to help him or save him. Not ever again. Naruto went a long with Neji not wanting Tsunade to suspect something wrong with him by refusing. The way she would know was if Kakashi told her about the scene in the hospital.

No words passed between the two males.

--

Naruto barged into Lady Tsunade's office with Neji trailing behind him.

Tsunade was looking at some papers. She put them down on her desk at Naruto and Neji's entrance. Her brown orbs looked Naruto up and down. He looked well and healthy minus the scowl on his face. “You are dismissed Hyuuga,” she spoke with authority to the other male with Naruto.

Neji bowed to her and disappeared from the room.

“Naruto, how are you doing?” She asked the boy standing before her.

He rolled his eyes and threw his arms out. “Why is everyone asking me that?! Of course, I'm okay. And don't tell me that this is the reason of why you called me here to just ask how I was doing, old hag.”

She smiled inside. At least, it was her normal Naruto she was used to. Wait, he just called her old. Okay, she knew that she was old but she didn't like someone rubbing that in her face. Yeah, she had to be used to it by now because Naruto called her it at their every meetings, not! Her hands slammed on her desk that the sheets of papers flew everywhere from it.

“Watch who you are talking to, brat!”

“Yeah, yeah, can I go?” Naruto ruffled his locks absentmindedly. “I want to go visit Sakura, it's been a while since I have seen her.”

Tsunade's gaze lowered to her hands on the desk. “You can't.”

Naruto got angry. “What?! What do you mean I can't! Is she on a mission or something?” Yeah, act stupid like you don't know anything.

“No ,Naruto, there are things that have been going on. Things that I can't tell you of yet but you can't see Sakura now. You will have to wait until I give you my word.”

Tsunade yawned feeling tired already. It had been a long day. She just wanted to go home and rest but not today, because of Sasuke and Sakura. Now she had to go talk to the counselCouncil about the matter.

Naruto rubbed his throat. “W-what? I-is she okay?”

Tsunade puffed her cheeks and looked deep into his eyes. “She will be…”

That was when a knock rammed on Tsunade's door. “Come in!” she shouted to the person.

The door was pushed open and a nurse's head peaked into the room before she walked in fully and bowed her head to the Hokage. “We need you in the hospital.”

“Hn.” Tsunade looked at Naruto as she rose. She walked around her desk and ruffled his hair.

“You need to go home and rest. I have a mission for you tomorrow.”

He pulled his head out of her touch. She sighed, knowing that he was hurting inside. He lost his best friend. Now, his crush was mentally unstable, although she didn't exactly tell him that but refused him of seeing her. In fact, she hadn't told him anything. She was protecting him, she knew but for how long? There would be a day she would have to tell him everything and knew that Naruto would never be the same again. She prayed that for now that missions distracted him.

Naruto couldn't be told twice and shimmered from her office to the fighting grounds. He fell on his knees and bent so that he was on his hands too staring at the perched grass below him. Darkness engrossed around him, it was nighttime.

She will be.

What did Hokage mean by that? Did something happen to Sakura? Was she hurt in anyway? And why was she? He sniffled loudly. No, he would not cry this time. Tears wouldn't give him a solution to his problems.

Why was he so emotional and shit? He wiped the small tear in the corner of his eye. But, he felt so angry at all the three of them. Neji, Tsunade and-and Kyuubi. Why did they do things for him thinking that they are helping him? Tsunade was protecting him from the truth, which he already knew. Neji accused Sakura of a crime SHE DIDN'T EVEN DO! Kyuubi killed-

Kit, don't beat yourself up too much.

You…you killed Sasuke.

He was becoming a nuisance.

You had no right! How many times do you want me to tell you to stop meddling in my life?!

And I will tell you again, you are my life kit and I won't stand in the corner and watch you destroy yourself.

You killed my best friend.

With a good reason.

Naruto lay on his back and moved his tongue in the inside of his cheeks. He put his arm over his temple. It was wrong but he felt so tired, so tired and tempted to give in to how everything was playing out. He was a disappointment to Sakura. He failed her and broke his promise to her. Nevertheless, a man raped him. Right then, his mind wandered to suicide.