Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ A Pilot's Fate ❯ Chapter 4 ( Chapter 5 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

A Pilot's Fate
Chapter Four
Ronin Setora

**Recap**
Shinji's thoughts again fell upon the Second Child. He had not been surprised
she did not speak when he confronted her the day before. He was glad though
that she did not appear angry at him any longer. The First Child did not know
what had occured in Asuka's own mind about that night, but he knew it felt
good to be on level ground with her, somewhat. He found himself wishing for
her company again and did not dislike the thought of them together.
"...Asuka."
** **

Weeks had passed and to she who would ponder human emotion, they were not themselves to the extent it was
disgusting. With the constant emotions that plagued her- of jealousy, hate, love, pity -she believed it reasonable
to keep a journal of these things new to her. In this journal was stored all her observations in frightening detail.

Tenth day of Ninth month, 22:48 hrs-
It grows worse with them each day. These thoughts I cannot voice must be expressed somehow. Sohryu acts
strangely: her breath quickens in Ikari's prescence, her eyes grow large and shine. She seems to barely manage to
suppress a smile. Every spare moment she casts Ikari a glance and should he not flinch, she would hold the gaze
for minutes.
With Ikari... his attitude is the same as always yet not. Never has he seemed so committed to his current task- the
cello -nor has he ever been so comfortable around Sohryu. He does not speak to anyone it appears but seems so
content in that silence. In Sohryu's prescence, his attention, his focus peaks, especially during those moments he
runs along the strings. He plays with such ferocity his fingers have grown callused and sweat drips from his
brow.
I know not why I think so often of Ikari but he is distracted it seems by another.

Each day, for the two weeks up to the present, she recorded events as this and never bothered to hide her
journal. She left it upon the kitchen counter so carelessly, none even wondered of its contents. She wrote upon
its pages in that very place, not even attempting to find privacy. The Second and Third Children were too taken
by one another to notice Ayanami Rei's growing distraught.
For every entry made into that diary, the following morning greeted her with unpleasant thoughts of Ikari with
Sohryu. Helping none, her deepest thoughts were that she could never have Ikari because she could not
understand him. She could not understand why he had fought the Angel that first time in her place, though she
now knew it as compassion and pity. She at first did not understand why he had risked his health to save her
from her entry plug but now knew that as love.
But Ikari's love for her was friendly, if not brotherly. And why should it not be, she knew what bond she had
with Shinji truly. This was her reasoning and this was the cause of her deepening depression. Had Shinji or
Asuka been less taken with one another they would have noticed how her thoughts were affecting her actions.
One would bring events to everyone's attention and that one would be the least predicted for such observations.
Perhaps it was the unending time spent with one female that made him so aware, but nomatter the reasoning, he
had noticed even the smallest changes occuring in his comrades.

As Rei had observed, changes in two former Pilots were occuring. Perhaps their bodies were catching up with
their minds or it could have been their feelings for one another but they could not think of any but the other.
Shinji progressed with his cello with such intensity he seemed to be trying to impress Asuka and she was so
extremely passive it could have been to feel less a threat to Shinji.
Shinji sat alone, as he believed, in the living room and took a deep breath. He raised his bow and drew one long
not along the strings. With a light sigh, he made the strings sing, each note a beautiful piece itself and all of
them together the most wonderful sound any could ever hear. As he drew confidence, thinking none were present in
the household with Rei shopping, Touji & Hikari out and Asuka unknown, the brown-haired teen sped up the piece and
drifted into another, more lively tune.
All the while, as Shinji took great pleasure in this musical relief, Asuka stood atop the stair, her eyes shut and
body rocking gently to each side, and as he faded into the quicker piece, as did her movements accelerate. For
endless moments they remained like this, the music their link to one another.
Finally, Shinji closed the piece with a long-held bow quiver, sighed again and smiled to himself. Asuka thought to
congradulate him, then thought better of it and walked back to her room. Shinji's ears caught the light click from
her closing door and frowned,
"Did she like it... ?"

Shinji took old advice, resting himself in a bath. Unlike previous times though, no unpleasant thoughts came to
him, as he originally figured would. This time, there were only thoughts of life, of happy life, no longer of
abandonment or dissappointment, nor was his mind on pain or suffering. His mind rested on future- pleasant
future. What he saw for himself he never really believed would occur but wishful thinking had always distantly
been a part of Shinji's existence.
The pleasant future he saw for himself was not alone but still did not include acceptance by his father. The future
he saw was not one of a perfect world where conflict or sadness did not exist and still included his own moments
of dissappointment. But these things did not strip the teen of the smile he bore, they only increased it as he
wished to spend those days with one and one only.
Her flaming red hair, strong hand gripping his own as they moved together down their path. Her face lighted,
smile wide toward him, no hint of malice or deception apparent. These things were all just dreams for the Third
Child and so rarely did he dream that this was no time to ruin the moment. His bath continued with these
unattainable goals circling his mind.
As sleep fell upon him, dreams of Asuka remained but these were not nearly so pleasant. What came to him then were
times of her pain, and thinking of Asuka hurt caused him to feel worse. His thoughts were of her past, loss of her
mother, lack of a Father (how like him he noted to himself), her confidence being broken time and again, all these
moments in Asuka's life hit Shinji, forced him to notice what common ground they stood on. Was that perhaps why he
felt so strongly for her, no more than they could relate? Again Ikari Shinji did not know what he felt over Sohryu
Asuka Langley but hoped his ignorance wouldn't ruin the good times that lie upon him now.

The Second Child had told another what she hoped for the longest that none would know. She had revealed absolutely
everything to Hikari Horaki and now she felt better for it. Though the Horaki child could not relate personally,
Asuka found what she needed was to get out all she had held in away from the world. The German girl had left out no
detail she could remember, spanning from the disgust for her parents to her reasoning, her NEED to be above
everyone else. Even her truest feelings for those around her were revealed, focusing much on an Ikari.
All these things that had flooded Hikari that night were still being processed. She had long known her friend to be
much deeper than what could be seen but she could never had fathomed the fierce hatred, love, or extreme philosophy
that may have existed in her mind. It was all a wonder to Hikari, a wonder that left her so dazed, one in
particular had noticed it. He had seen a lot of things before, noticed a lot of changes in those around him but had
done nothing; now the changes were in she that mattered most to him and it was time to bring up the subject with
the cause of everyone's trouble.
That evening, Touji was found sitting at the table well before dinner. As Shinji walked in, witnessing Touji would
have been no surprise had Hikari been at his side, but Suzuhara alone with no food present was a rare sight. The
Fourth Child's position was also not a common one, more of business than casual talk. To Shinji, he seemed also
irritated, as if he had been waiting for him for quite some time. The Ikari child was bewildered and spoke first,
"Touji! How are you?"
Touji stared back at him for a moment before replying,
"You're causing a lot of havoc ya know that Shinji?"
He blinked a few times, then pointed to himself,
"Me?"
Touji sat patiently, his silence and lack of movement making Shinji think of his Father... it was strange, Touji
hadn't even made a comeback off such a comment.
"Hikari is bothered because Asuka is so taken with you and Rei has been off because you have done nothing for, or
to, anyone."
Suzuhara Touji was being frighteningly straightforward, no jokes or poking around whatsoever. It was all Shinji
could do to keep from commenting about it- this didn't seem like the time to bother the Fourth Child.
"I'm telling you now to make a move."
For a few more seconds his face remained serious then broke into its devious smile. The Third Child released his
breath in a relieved sigh having believed there was something seriously wrong with his friend. Despite old
appearances though, Touji's voice was firm,
"You truly are throwing off my week like this though. Deal with that Oni-Child ["demon child"] before I have to fix
you myself."
That had been all he said before rising and walking out of the room, out of the building. Shinji stood in wonder
before the table,
"...Hm."

The following day, Shinji is found again with his cello in the living room. He draws one note to tune, then begins,
a piece that starts slow and speeds up every measure. He has full knowledge that only one other is within the house
and takes advantage of that. This day he was full of confidence and refused to be brought down. Perhaps his future
was not impossible.
Asuka sat up on her bedding and put down the book she had been reading. It lacked interesting material so a reason
to stop was welcome. What came was not crashing, screaming, or even the smell of something but was a gentle
beginning to music she had heard before. It was from a great composer but she could not think of which at the time.
Nonetheless, the piece was enjoyable and she knew it to be Shinji upon his cello. The Second Child exited the room
and descended the stairs in silence, listening intently as the song grew more energetic. Not long after, Shinji's
arm was sliding back and forth and his hand upon the fretboard was never still. His playing grew more and more
intense until finally, he snapped a string.
The silence that followed was a deafening one, such a fiery piece, perfectly representative of the Sohryu child,
broken in an instant by one little problem. Shinji made no movement afterward and for minutes the two remained
completely quiet. Under his breath, Shinji repeated a past used endearment,
"Asu-chan..." He referenced the string, "...broken."
His shoulders moved with his breaths finally and he began to rise. Asuka stepped forward, attracting his attention.
She thought for just a moment, hesitated for another, then opened her mouth to speak. As Ikari Shinji's eyes
pierced her own, no words came out. When he blinked, they fell from her lips,
"Shinji-kun...?"
"...hai?"
"Could you... play a piece for me?"
He drew from a small box upon the couch a coiled string,
"Hai."

~Owari~

Post Author Notes:
Well, that would be all I'd say. Look back through the story and understand this- I didn't have Kaji killed
just cuz I like him and wanted him around, I put Asu-chan and Ikari-kun together because they are perfect, and I
didn't write off of E.o.E because there would be no one to write with except those two. Translations as follows-
"-kun" word added to the end of a close boy's name.
"-chan" just the same but for a girl
"hai" yes