Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ PenPen in Love? ❯ The Beginning ( Chapter 1 )

PenPen in love?!

Chapter One

Author's Note

There will be slight swearing a bit of nudity and one very unusual pairing.

Disclaimer NO I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion, I wish I did but I don't!

Sigh…..

Misato woke up one fine morning, the sun was shining the birds were tweeting the sky was clear and blue it was a lovely morning. That is of course, if you didn't have a hangover.

To Misato, the sun was an orb of unholy terror, the birds were harsh cries of doom, and the sky seemed to be laughing at her.

The only other thing going through her mind was beer, beer, beer and etc etc.

Struggling to get out of bed she half crawled half stumbled to the kitchen where Asuka and Shinji were going through there usual morning ritual.

"Baka, baka you stupid baka! How dare you make ME eat this slop!" Asuka yelled.

"Gomen gomen gomen," Shinji cried out.

"Don't say it, just don't say it! Asuka screamed.

Misato ignored this dispite her hangover; she had only one goal, beer.

She opened the fridge, grabbed a beer, ripped off the tab and then poured the contents down her throat.

"Yyyyyyyyeeeeeeaaaaaaaahhhhhhaaaaaa!!" she shouted her morning greeting.

Silence.

"Good morning Misato," Shinji squeaked out staring at Misato state of dress or undress whatever you like to call it.

"Guten morgen," Asuka mumbled.

"Why so gloomy, it's a wonderful day!" said the ever happy Misato.

"Yeah right, we have a test today, oh the humanity!" the depressed Asuka lamented.

"Shit! I didn't know we had a test today!" Shinji swore.

"Baka! How could you not know, this is the biggest test of the year! If you don't pass *pauses, evil smirk in place* you will have to repeat this year! Mha ha ha ha! Asuka laughed evilly.

"Oh my God, oh God, holy God!" Shinji muttered.

"By the way, you have a sync test today" Misato murmured.

"YES! You know what this means don't you Shinji?!" Asuka yelled.

"You're high?" Shinji answered (stupidly).

SMACK

"OW"

"NO I'm not HIGH you BAKA! This means we miss out on the test! And because we are `special' AKA Eva pilots we get an A+ every time we are doing NERV stuff!" Asuka retorted.

Misato felt it was time to go and being slightly tipsy (for Misato) didn't notice her state of undress.

Asuka being Asuka being the fine person that she is didn't tell her.

Shinji being Shinji was to embarrassed to tell her.

So off they went!

*********************

Speeding along the highway narrowing missing 45 school children, 34 cars, 14 buses, 10 trucks, 7 motorbikes and a pram, so far.

"Misato!" Asuka screamed.

"Yes?" Misato answered.

"Where did you learn to drive?!"

"F$%# off @$$wipe!!!" Misato yelled, as a motorist tried to pass her.

Then.

"Oh, I just picked it up," Misato mildly replied.

"Then where did you get your licence?" Asuka asked.

"What license?"

"Sweet mother of Goooddd!!!!" Asuka yelled, as they swerved an old lady.

"YES," a sweet voice boomed out.

"So there is a mother of God," Shinji mused.

****************

As they arrived at the entrance to NERV the security personal were surprised to see a semi-undressed Major, two frightened-out-of-their-wits-children and a drunken penguin.

But the fact was the personal was lazy and didn't want to mess with Misato who they had heard had caused the castration competition and had won 25 to 0, and as the personal were male this caused a bit of a scare to say the least.

So they were let pass.

****************

Reaching the Nerv carport seemed like a dream to Asuka and Shinji so in their state of mind didn't notice the penguin following them.

Misato led them to the uni-sex changing rooms, that is of course if she didn't have a lousy sense of direction.

And led them to the cage of Unit-1.

"Now, how did I get here?" Misato mumbled.

Shinji and Asuka coughed in surprise and disbelief.

Suddenly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Eva Unit-1 has woken and has set itself in love-love mode!" a voice boomed out.

"Love-love mode? What the hell is this? Gott in himmel, Nerv is more nuts than I thought!" Asuka cried out.

"No idea! But I think that's the least of our worries!" Shinji said pointing at Unit-1. Who had begun to glow a pinkish-red and little cupids were buzzing around her head while love hearts danced eerily like a Sailor Moon sequence, Shinji shivers at this thought.

But Asuka wasn't listening. She was staring at the entrance where the silhouette of a penguin shone out.

Slowly the penguin came into view it's frame backgrounded by a light behind it, creating a mystic affect.

And it was PenPen!!!!

And the penguin let out a mighty cry.

"Wwwwaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrkkkkkkk!"

And was answered by….

Unit-1?

"Oh PenPen, oh dear sweet PenPen come to me you adorable thing!"

PenPen ran to Unit-1 where they started to make out.

"Oh PenPen, PENPEN!"

Asuka pinched herself, "Oooowwww!" Nope that hurt which, meant that she wasn't dreaming.

Crap shit.

She had been, really really hoping this was some terrible nightmare and not real life.

Shinji was surprised to say the least, I mean here was Unit-1 making out with PenPen.

Well at least he knew where PenPen was going out at night, yeah……..

Misato didn't think for awhile.

That is until a dirty thought hit her mind.

What if Unit-1 got pregnant?

What would the baby look like?

Just then there was a voice, a voice filled with hate, anger, evil, darkness and above all envy.

"What is the meaning of this?" Gendo Ikari boomed out, looking at disbelief at Unit-1.

Gendo was angry, very angry when he had seen Unit-1 making out with PenPen he had at first been shocked, I mean how often do you see a penguin make out an Eva? But then his feelings had changed to betrayal, the f#^%@*& b@#$%&*! Of a penguin was making out with his wife!!! His feelings had settled to anger, a burning rage!

"Weeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllll, SIR!, I have to tell you the truth which is kinda short and a don't have much informa-

"Just spit it out, Major!" Gendo barked out.

"No idea SIR!" Misato said crisply.

"REALLY! Well that is just super!" Gendo exclaimed. Then. "Major?"

"Yes Sir?!" Misato said smartly.

"Your punishment is to get those two apart! NOW!" Gendo ordered.

"Um, sir? What did I do wrong?" Misato asked.

"For letting that…. creature live," Gendo venomously.

"Oh I see. No I don't! Why do you want PenPen to die? I mean you're acting like a jealous husband. I mean you're not married to Unit-1 are you?" Misato answered back.

"I do not see fit to answer that question, Major!" Gendo replied sharply.

Meanwhile Unit-1 and PenPen were still making out!

Smooch, giggle, kiss and so on.

And then there was the two Eva pilots.

"Hentai! How dare you look at them making out!" Asuka screamed.

"Gomen, gomen, gomen Asuka!" Shinji whimpered.

"Stop saying that!" Asuka yelled out while hitting Shinji in the head losing vital brain cells

At that point Shinji was in a groveling position and was bowing down to her.

And that was when Rei made her entrance.

She looked at Shinji in front of Asuka groveling and raised an eyebrow.

She looked at Gendo having a hissy fit and Misato creeping up on Unit-1 and PenPen with a gleaming dagger in hand and raised the other blue brow.

Then her red eyes rested on the making out of Unit-1 and PenPen and…… gasped?!

And then there was silence.

Everyone looked at Rei shell-shocked!!!

Rei had gasped?!

End of Chapter One.

Word Meanings.

Japanese

Baka = idiot, stupid

Gomen = sorry

Hentai = pervert

German

Gott in Himmel = God in Heaven

Guten morgen = Good morning

In the next chapter!

Will Misato kill PenPen?

Will Rei become emotional?

Will PenPen and Unit-1 marry?

Is Unit-1 pregnant?

Find out in the next chapter!

Thank you reading this.

Please R/R

10/02/03