Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ World Conflict II: Evangelion ❯ Rise, Bow, Sit! ( Chapter 2 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Vergessener Held 
Okay, maybe I'm not THAT lucky. WAIT A MINUTE! What do you mean I have to get a job!? Ah, crap!
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Adventure / Action | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 08.05.2004 | Updated On: 08.15.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 240 | Status: Completed
Okay, maybe I'm not THAT lucky. WAIT A MINUTE! What do you mean I have to get a job!? Ah, crap!
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Adventure / Action | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 08.05.2004 | Updated On: 08.15.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 6.4K | Visits: 240 | Status: Completed
From now on in your reviews, tell me one good thing and one bad thing about my story, so I know what to keep and what to fix. I'd like to note that I don't know the ¥ to $US ratio. I played Shenmue recently and it was ¥100 to $1, so that's the way I'll use it.
This week's quote: "Your music sounded like a bird getting caught in a blender..." - Cutter Slade (Outcast, the PC GAME, NOT THE FAGGOT HIP HOP DUDE!)
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"I still can't believe you did that," Zakku groaned, rubbing his face. "It's supposed to be romantic, you moron! I'm not going to let you touch me unless you come up with something romantic!" Avira said, untying his feet. Apparently, Zakku had pushed his luck and got tied up so he couldn't get near her. "Now I don't want to get close to you! You fucking tied me up and tossed me into a corner of the room!" Zack said as he stood up, then looked at her in her underwear, "You might want to put-- OW! DAMN IT! Must be your period, huh?" Avira raised her hand like she was going to slap him again, and Zack backed up into the door, which opened, and Ian poked his head out from behind the control panel. "I just thought... Uh," he just stared at Avira in her underwear.
"IAN NO BAKA HENTAI!" Zakku yelled, booting his friend in the stomach. Ian fell over, holding his gut, "That hurts, you know! And what the fuck is 'buku hanta'?" Zakku tried to pull his hair out, "MY PRONOUNCIATION ISN'T THAT BAD! ARGHHH!" Anba's laugh could be heard as she walked down the hall, "Yes, it is! Although you DID get that right. Baka is stupid, hentai is pervert, Ian. Both of which you are. And I thought we agreed not to speak both languages in the same sentence? It's confusing as hell, not to mention it makes you sound like an ass," Anba said, hugging Zakku as hard as she could. "GAH! ALRIGHT! JUST LET GO!" Zakku yelped. Anba let go, and then looked at the case of drugs, "You need to take another one, don't you? We also need to get the cleaning drone in here for that blood stain on the floor. "GUESS WHAT, ZACK!? WE GET TO GET JOBS! YAY!" Ian stood up and put his chin on her shoulder, "I am your second head."
"AGH! GET OFF OF ME!" Anba screamed, shoving him away. "Since when do we have to get jobs? We can get supplies from the Ragnarok, right?" Ian asked, stopping himself by grabbing the door frame. "We can, we just need to keep an eye on that kid," Anba said, then grinned, "I GET TO WORK IN A CARTOON STUDIO!" Ian laughed, "I get to open the autoshop I wanted!" They looked at Zack, who was flicking Avira in the nose, she'd flick him, wash, rinse, repeat. "...what? I'm only 15, I can't get a job!" Zakku said, then got shoved off the bed by Avira. He got up and shoved her, only in the wrong place. Avira slapped him, leaving a big red handprint as he removed his hand from her chest. "It was worth the pain," Zakku said, grinning. "Oh yeah!? HOW ABOUT THIS!?" Avira said, giving him a pleasant kick in the nads for good measure. Zack fell over, holding his balls. Ian laughed as he squirmed around in agony.
"I'm going to get a job, too?" Avira said, looking at them. "NO! NO WAY!" Zakku yelled, getting up. "Why not?" Anba asked, grinning at him, "Afraid she might meet a guy she likes more than you?" Zakku's eyebrow twitched, as it often did when he was extremely annoyed. "NO! She'll probably get a job at a bar someplace with lots of drug-addicts and... eh heh heh heh," Zakku backed away when he saw the look on Ian's face, "Well, then what the hell am I supposed to do!?" Anba and Ian both hummed, as if thinking, "AH! THAT'S IT!"
(2 days later)
The tires squealed as Zakku made a 90° turn towards the diner. "I can't believe you have to wear that outfit for the next year!" he said through his helmet, looking at the dress in Avira's lap; she was sitting in an attached cart to the side of the bike, and she looked somewhat scared. "Could you please slow down?" she asked, sounding very nervous. "If you hadn't spent so much damn time getting ready, we wouldn't have been late! Now I'm late for work! I have to get to school!" Zakku growled, and stopped in front of the diner. "You're an asshole," Avira said, smiling at him as she got off. "I love you, too! Stay out of trouble! Anything happens, call me on your cellphone!" Zakku said, speeding off.
- - -
"Where's the teacher? He should have been here by now," Hikari said, looking somewhat worried. "Well, maybe he's sick and they had trouble finding a sub," Kensuke said. He stood at 5', with scruffy brown hair and big, round glasses At 4'10", Hikari walked over to the window, her pigtails swaying as she moved, and she shielded her deep, brown eyes from the sun. "Well, what if something happened to him on the way here? Or what if he was really hurt in that incident?" Hikari said, then noticed some complete moron streak into the parking lot like he was running in the Grand Prix. "Woah! That's one awesome-looking bike!" a boy said, and a few other kids moved to look through the window. It was a shiny silver bike with black trim, a Kawasaki Ninja ZX6R (I actually went online to look for a very sexy-looking bike, and I was lucky to come across this Kawasaki, which is my favorite manufacturer. Yes, I love motorcycles!).
The rider was wearing a sky blue jacket with angel wings painted onto the back, with a helmet of the same color (hmmm.... coincidence with the wings? :-) Maybe!). "Maybe that's the guy who's supposed to replace our teacher?" one of the boys said. "What makes you so sure it's a guy?" a girl asked. "Well, it's either a guy or a very flat-chested lady!" one of the other boys said. A few of the kids laughed, The rider took off his helmet, his long brown hair dropping down onto his back, and he shook his head. "He's too young looking to be a teacher!" one of the girls said. "How can you tell? You can't see him good from this view!" another boy said. The man looked at his wrist, then took the keys out of his motorcycle and ran inside, carrying the jacket and helmet, along with what looked like a guiter case.
The kids sat back down, talking amongst themselves. A few minutes later, the bell for first period rang, and Hikari stood up, sighing. "I guess I'll have to do roll call," she said, walking to the folder with the list of names. A faint sound like footsteps and curses were heard, only they were in English. The door slid open, and Hikari turned around. "I'm sor-- Why are you so late!? Students are supposed to be here before homeroom period ends!" she yelled. The boy before her smiled, his voice had a heavy American accent, "Please get back to your seat, miss. I believe that's MY desk." Hikari glared at him, "I know you're a student! Now sit down!" The boy's eyes narrowed, "Excuse me? I suggest you sit down before I throw your ass into detention, you here me? I'm the new teacher, since your previous one is in the hospital. Now sit down and shut your mouth!" Hikari stared at him, her mouth hanging open, then sat down, "Sorry, sir."
"It's alright, don't get all mopey," the boy said, walking to the teacher's desk and leaning his guitar case against the wall, hanging his helmet on the top, and his jacket on the chair. "Okay, everyone, sit down!" the man said. No one heard him. "HEY! SIT DOWN!" he said louder, but no one heard him because of the shouting. The man grabbed his guitar case and slammed it onto the floor as hard as he could, making a loud booming sound that made all of the students except Rei and Shinji jump. "Now sit down!" he said, and everyone did. Everyone was staring at the white dress shirt and black pants he was wearing. Then a boy laughed, "You had us going for a second there. Where's the teacher?" The young man walked over to the student, who looked up at him, "You're looking at him. No, I'm not kidding, so don't open your mouth. And stop staring at my earrings, because they aren't for sale." Everyone was looking at them now, the silver sword earrings.
"My name is Zachary Duarte. Yes, I'm 15 years old. I already have my degrees, so don't worry about it. Don't start calling me sensei or something, Zakku will do just fine. And take those headphones off," Zakku said, grabbing the yardstick and lifting the headphones off Shinji's head, since he was daydreaming. Shinji finally came back to Earth, and stared at Zakku, "You're the guy who saved me when that monster came towards me." Zakku laughed, "How'd ya like the ride? Thrilling enough for you?" Everyone looked at the two, back and forth. Zakku leaned on the yardstick, then looked around. "So, you guys take out your textbooks, or do I just teach you?" Hikari spoke up before anyone else had the chance, "we're studying Second Impact and the effects it had on Earth." Zakku sighed, "Second Impact this, Second Impact that. I bet that's all you kids learn about, right?" Everyone nodded.
"Alright! Tell you what! To hell with Second Impact! Let's pretend it never happened!" Zakku said, starting to walk around the classroom. Everyone looked surprised, and he laughed, "That's right, it never happened. What do YOU want to learn about? And I want it to do with history. You'll basically be repeating the same thing with math anyway. If you want math, you can see me after school for it. But in this room during school hours, it's history ONLY. Now, what do you want to learn about in history?" Hands shot up, although it wasn't even half the class. "Oooh, I know! How about fuedal Japan, where corrupt politics and crazy assassins ran around chopping people up!" Zakku said, and a few people looked angry. "Don't get offended, I'll make fun of all people eventually. How about World War II, where a crazy white bastard decided any people against him should die, only his people were the only ones dying BECAUSE HE HAD THEM SIT IN A DAMN HOLE ALL DAY!?" Zakku said, and a few of the angry looks went away.
"Or how about the American's Civil War, where a bunch of rednecks and racists decided it'd be nice to fight each other because black people were in slavery. 'Oh yeah, it's wrong to let you be in slavery, but we're going to treat you like shit for the next 100 years!' Of course, every single person back in America now does drugs becaue they are all complete morons, just like back then!" Zakku said, then pointed to a girl's hand who was up, "What's your first name and what do you want to learn?" The girl spoke softly, barely above a whisper, "My name is Mari... What about ancient Egypt?" Zakku put his hand to his ear, "I'm sorry, what's that?" The girl spoke louder, but it was still very soft, "My name is Mari and I want to know about ancient Egypt." Zakku said loudly in her ear, "I'm sorry! Could you speak louder?!" The girl spoke louder, finally at a decent volume, "My name is Mari and I want to learn about ancient Egypt!" Zakku nodded and patted her on the shoulder, "That's better! You can't state your opinions if you speak as if you were dying. What about you?" He pointed to a boy in the very back.
"My name is Kazuki and I want to learn about the Renaissance," the boy said. "Ahh, Raphael, Michealangelo, Donatello, and Leonardo da Vinci.... all great artists," Zakku said, nodding his head as he made his way to the front of the room, "What about you, Shinji?" Shinji looked up nervously, then his glance shot back down, "I don't know..." Zakku grabbed his chin and lifted his glance up to his face. "You've gotta start looking people in the eye. I get nervous often and do that too, but you have to learn to resist it." He let go and sat on the teacher's desk. Zakku picked up a piece of chalk and chucked it straight at the mirror used for make-up from a girl's hand. "Pay attention in my class or I'll start throwing larger things, like my guitar!" he said, grinning, "Now, what do you want to learn about?" The girl shrugged, picking up her mirror, "Who cares about school? It's not like we need it."
Zakku sighed, then threw another piece of chalk, knocking the mirror out of her hand as she tried to put the make-up on again, "Put that away. Now. We need school because human culture depends on intelligence and knowledge. Unless you'd rather marry a complete moron and live in a cave?" The girl laughed, "I don't need school. My father is a long way away from poor." Zakku sighed, "Every school I go to has a girl like you. Alright, let's say your father goes bankrupt and you have to make your OWN money. What are you going to do without an education? You're going to end up living on the streets." The girl shrugged, "Plenty of rich guys out there." Everyone was looking at her as if she were a complete ditz (coughtootruecough). Zakku merely made a cough sound that sounded strangely close to "bitch".
"Alright, y'know what? No class today. We're just going to plan for the year and get to know each other. First, however, I want to introduce you to THIS," Zakku said, holding up a small black case that he withdrawed from his jacket, "This contains a drug I have to take every 6 hours. To anyone else besides me, it is a lethal dosage. Unless you want to die, I DO NOT suggest you take one of these. You won't get a high either, so don't try it. You'll just die within the next five seconds of taking it. And THIS--" Zakku held out a syringe filled with a white liquid, "--is also something you don't want to take. Unless, of course, you want to grow a third arm and have something like a Child of Fillidimai (I hope I spelled that right! e-mail me with the correct spelling if I didn't)." Zakku's vision became hazy. He put the white syringe in the case and pulled out the black syringe.
"Anyone who has a weak stomach, I suggest you turn away RIGHT now!" Zakku said, and a number of girls and a couple of guys turned away. Zakku put the syringe into his neck and injected the fluid, then pulled it out and braced himself. He fell to his knees and vomitted blood onto the floor, which he grabbed a paper towel used to clean the chalk board and wiped it up. "Okay, you can turn around now!" Zakku said, tossing the blood-soaked towel into the trash. The students turned around and looked around, specifically at their teacher, who was still sweating. "Are you alright?" one of the guys asked, getting up just incase. "I'm fine, so sit down!" Zakku said, then wiped the sweat off his forehead, then looked around. "Alright, who's next to tell me what they want to learn?"
- - -
"Drawing the same thing 500 times gets boring really fast," Anba said, sighing as she placed her pencil down. The man next to her laughed, "You've broken my record by complaining on the first day. You work really fast, too!" Anba shook her head, "Well, it's the SAME thing, only with slight variations. I've got a finger cramp." The man shook his head, then looked at the clock, "Ah, it's lunch time! C'mon, I know a good place to eat!" Anba watched him for a moment, "If you're trying to ask me out, I have a boyfriend already. Er... what was your name again?" The man laughed again, "Oh, geez! My name is Haru. And I have a girlfriend, so don't worry." Anba laughed and walked past him, "Alright, then! Let's go eat!"
"There's a restaurant right near here that makes really good food!" Haru yelled as he ran towards his SUV. "It looks like a cardboard box," Anba said, cracking up as she looked at the black box-style SUV. "Haha, laugh it up. It might be a decade old, but I like it!" Haru said, starting the engine as she got in. "Now.... TO THE RESTAURANT!" Anba pointed forward, yelling.
- - -
The shop's bell rang, and Ian attempted to poke his head up, only to smack it on the bottom of the car. "Damn it... COMING!" Ian yelled, rolling out from under the old Volkswagen he was fixing up. Ian strode into the waiting room, which held all the parts and whatnot on display. The first thing he noticed was purple. The purple hair, the red chest jacket that stopped just between her chest and her hips, the black shirt and miniskirt to go with it and the brown eyes he was staring into. All of this made one thing cross his mind-- "Holy shit!" Ian said, stepping back when he saw Misato Katsuragi standing there. "Do I know you? Or are you astounded by my good looks?" she joked, making a pose. Ian laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. "Well, what do you damn it!" Ian said. Misato looked at him as if he were on crack, "You're not very good with Japanese, are you?"
"Nope," Ian said, then laughed again. "I need you to fix up the body of my car. If there are any parts I need to replace I don't care, just don't hurt it. It's a classic!" Misato said, then looked at Ian, who was already checking out the car. "I haven't seen one of these in years! I'll only charge you ¥10,000 for labor. I can't believe I get to work on one of these! Anyway, what's your name? Mine's Ian!" Ian said, grinning. "Like I said, don't hurt my car. If you do, I'll have to hurt you. And my name is Misato Katsuragi," Misato said, looking him over. 'Atleast I found a mechanic that doesn't weigh 400 lbs and doesn't stink. He's not that bad-looking... Sort of looks like... Ugh, why am I thinking about him!?' Misato thought. "Uh, Misato?" Ian said, waving his hand in front of her. Misato looked at him nervously and smiled, "Uh, yes?" Ian raised a brow at the look, but dismissed it, "You can come back to pick your car up in 3 days, It might be more, though. This thing is really messed up!"
"Yeah, I know. It's because of that Angel attack," Misato said, putting venom into the word 'Angel'. Ian nodded a bit, "Something tells me those Angels are going to be a pain in the ass. There's supposed to be 17, right?" Misato looked at him with that strange look again, "Where did you hear that?" Ian shrugged, "I do my research." Misato looked at her watch, "I might as well take the rest of the day off, since it's too far to walk to NERV. Mind if I stay here?" Ian shook his head as he began pushing her car into the empty garage, "I.... don't mind.... one.... bit! Damn this thing is stubborn!" Misato laughed and held up the keys. "Oh.... yeah.... we could do that too.... Er... I mean.... NOT THAT KIND OF DOING! DON'T HIT ME!" Ian said, placing his hands on his crotch, drawing a grin from Misato.
"That's reserved only for my special man," Misato said, winking at him. "Hitting on me won't lower the price any further, Ms. Katsuragi!" Ian said, blushing as Misato laughed, driving the car into the garage. Ian held his arm up, forming a fist, and mouthed, "Yes!" to the sky.
- - -
"So, which one do you think is cuter, that new student or the new teacher?" a girl with long black hair asked the girl sitting beside her. "I think the teacher's kind of cute, but then again he's a teacher, so I'd only be able to ask out that new kid!" the girl said. Shinji overheard this, and was still wondering about something. 'Why was I picked to pilot EVA? Why couldn't anyone else do it?' he though, although no voice spoke back to him in his mind. He noticed Ayanami was looking out of the window of the classroom. She hadn't left the classroom to go eat lunch. Shinji's thoughts were disrupted by a loud guitar being played, along with someone singing.
Rei turned around, looking at the teacher, who was playing very loudly on his electric guitar. It looked like it was from the 60's and it was painted a shiny black. It was finely tuned, not sounding bitter or loose like guitars did if they were not maintained. Zakku was singing his heart out in English, although his headphones and closed eyes made him oblivious to everything around him as he played while sitting on his desk.
"so-a one, two, three! Tell me how it's gonna be because you look so fine that I really want to make you mine! I said you look so fine that I really wanna make you mine! Four, five, six! C'mon, now get your kicks! Now, you don't need the money when you look like that, do ya honey? Big black boots, long brown hair, she's so sweet with her 'get-back' stare! Well, I can see you home with me, but you are with another man yeah~! I know we ain't got much to say before I let you get away~, yeah! I said are you gonna be my girl? so-a one, two, three! Tell me how it's gonna be because you look so fine that I really want to make you mine! I said you look so fine that I really wanna make you mine! Four, five, six! C'mon, now get your kicks! Now you don't need the money with a face like that, do ya? Big black boots, long brown hair, she's so sweet with her 'get-back' stare! Well, I can see you home with me, but you are with another ma~n, yeah~! I know we ain't got much to say, before I let you get away~, YE--" Zakku stopped singing when he noticed all of his students sitting in front of him again.
"Er... don't mind me! I was just..... er.... crap!" Zakku said, turning off his headphones and putting his guitar away. "Why'd you stop singing? You're pretty damn good!" one of the guys said. "I am an amateur compared to my cousin. He used to give out CDs to friends and family, and he usually made fun of stuff, but he was very good at it!" Zakku said, then noticed the girl with mirror again, trying to put on her make-up. "I warned you to put that away," Zakku said, drawing her attention away from the mirror before she looked back again. Zakku sighed, then grabbed the yardstick from the desk, then went back to her and smacked it upwards out of her hand, then smashed it, using the yardstick as a baseball bat. "If you need to put on make-up, do it during lunch, before school, or after school. NOT while classes are in!" he said, glaring down at her. "You're going to have to pay for that," she said, giving him a dirty look.
"Not in my opinion. I warned you atleast twice today to not put make-up on in here. I don't believe in that 'take it away for a day' crap because kids get their stuff back, then do it again the next day. Remember that I'm still a kid, even if I am your teacher," Zakku said, then looked around, "So, what should we start on first?" Hands went up, and the lesson started.
- - -
"Finally! A teacher who can actually get us to understand something!" one of the girls said as she walked into the hall, making Zakku smile as he got all of his stuff together. "Uh.... sir?" a voice said, and Zakku turned around to face Shinji. "Just Zakku. I'm not an old man, I'm your age. Now what is it?" Zakku said, putting his jacket on. "Do you think you could teach me to play the guitar?" Shinji asked, looking down slightly. Zakku grinned and pulled his face upwards so they were eye to eye, "Stop doing that! And yes, I can teach you. You look like the kind of kid who likes Pachelbenon and Beethoven, though." Shinji looked at him with a surprised look, "How did you know?" Zakku laughed, "Lucky guess! Now get out of here, I have to go pick up my girlfriend from work." He shoved Shinji out the door, then ran out into the hall with his guitar case in hand, sliding the door closed.
"I'll teach you on Wednesdays, alright? See ya!" Zakku said, then dashed off. "He is really a strange person," Shinji said, walking out of the school. 'He seems to know a lot about me... Maybe he works for NERV?' Shinji said, then saw Zakku shoot off in his motorcycle, nearly running a couple of girls over as he swerved around the fence. Shinji then saw a man with black sunglasses in a black van. Shinji ignored it and began walking home. The sound of a van running followed. Shinji looked behind him and saw the black van from before. Shinji turned away again and began walking faster. The sound still followed. Shinji ran and turned around a corner, and the van followed him. He ran as fast as he could, running straight for home. He ran to the elevator, pushing the button, then looked behind him to see the van stop in front of the condo.
The elevator door opened, and he went inside, then pushed the button for his floor. The elevator sooned reached his floor and he walked to the door, then slipped his keycard through it, then stepped in. "Hello, Shinji!" Misato said cheerfully, opening a can of Yebisu beer and handing it to an unfamiliar looking man. "Uh.... hello," Shinji said shyly. Ian waved his hand, "Yo! What's up?" Shinji shrugged, "Do you live here, too?" Ian nearly choked on his beer, shaking his head, "No! I'm just fixing Misato's car and I drove her home." Shinji stood there for a moment, then walked into the living room, "Well, I'm going to watch TV." Misato blocked his path with her arm, "Where's your homework?" Shinji shrugged again, "We have a new teacher because our old one is hospitalized. He said we won't have any homework."
"Oh, really? My friend Zack just started teaching today at a junior highschool!" Ian said. "You know Mr. Zakku?" Shinji asked, and Ian was about to answer when his cellphone rang. "Uh... Sorry! Hello?" Ian said into the phone. "Look out! I'm coming to get you!" a raspy voice said. Ian laughed, "Nice try, dumbass. That won't work on me." He was just about to take the phone away from his ear when he saw a red dot on Misato's forehead, watching it move from time to time. "GET DOWN!" Ian said, dropping the phone and pouncing Misato. "AGHHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Misato screamed. Laughter erupted from the phone. "I GOT YOU, BITCH!" the voice yelled, then laughed again. "Zack, you son of a bitch!" Ian yelled as he grabbed the phone. "WHASSUP, MAH NIGGA!?" Zakku yelled, then laughed and pointed at him from across the street on the roof of a house. "Mr. Zakku!?" Shinji yelled, running to the balcony.
"Hey, Shinji!" Zakku yelled, waving, then jumped off of the roof of the building, landing on the street below. "WHAT THE HELL!?" Shinji screamed, looking down at the boy, who still stood on two feet. "A fall like that would kill a normal person!" Misato said, looking down as she walked to the balcony. "That's Zack for you! Then again, he shouldn't pull stunts like this so early in the evening," Ian said, waving down to the boy. Zakku ran to the elevator and got in, then got off at Shinji's floor. "You're so dead, you know that?" Ian said, grabbing his friend by the collar and yanking him out of the elevator and into a headlock. "You two know each other?" Misato asked, looking from one to the other.
"Yeah, we've been friends since we were kids!" Zakku said, biting his friend's arm to get released. Ian complied, then wiped his arm on his pants. "That's so gross!" he groaned, wiping the last of the saliva off. The clicking of a pistol's safety made them both raise their arms up. "You HAD to jump off that roof, didn't you? Now she's going to kill us!" Ian said. "What and who are you two!?" Misato asked, staring the two down. Zakku looked at the casings of beer outside the door, "I'll tell you if you give me a beer." Shinji stared at him, "Eh!?" Zakku nodded, "Yes, I drink." Misato nudged her head for the two of them to get inside, which they did, only Zakku was walking casually.
"YES! BEER! MWAHAHAHAHA!" Zakku said, opening the fridge and taking one out, then downed the entire can. "Ahhh! This stuff's pretty good!" he said, then tossed it into the trash. Misato closed the door, "Sit down and explain all this. How the hell did you jump off a roof and live!?" Zakku sighed, sitting down, "Should we REALLY tell them?" Ian gave him a glare, "You wanted the beer, so you explain. I could've ran!" Zakku sighed, and looked at the case after pulling it out of his back pocket. "Ah, hell. It's almost time to take them. Wait for five minutes, then you'll see!" Zakku said, putting it on the table. "Fine. Just don't move!" Misato said, keeping the pistol pointed at them. Five minutes passed, and Zakku began sweating.
"You'd better stand up, or they'll break the chair," Ian sighed. Zakku got up, and the excruciating pain came, making him fall to his hands and knees. He vomitted blood and began trembling. Two large bumps were pressing against the back of his shirt, which soon ripped, and his wings folded out. "You're... an angel!?" Shinji yelled, staring. "Yeah, I am. WHOAH! PUT THAT THING DOWN! I'M NOT ONE OF THOSE BIG MONSTERS!" Zakku yelled, stepping back as Misato stood up. "Like hell you aren't! You've got angel's wings for god's sake!" Misato yelled, pointing the pistol at his head. Ian grabbed her arms and twisted them back, "We're on your side! Zack's not going to change into one of those big monsters! He's not here to kill anyone... Unless you're not telling me something?"
"I'm betting you've noticed that ship in orbit. That's ours. We work for an organization that's here to help NERV out," Zakku said, "I can't really tell you anything big. But just so you know, the monsters aren't really who you think they are." He walked to the table, grabbed his case, then walked onto the balcony and flew off. "ZACK! YOU MORON! You're gonna get us both killed.... Sorry, Misato! Love you! Bye bye," Ian said quickly, running to the door and unlocking it, then running out before Misato could shoot at him. "Come back here!" Misato yelled, picking up the pistol and running after him. Ian was already in the elevator and the doors closed before she could get to it. Misato ran down the stairs, trying to catch up to him. When the elevator reached the ground floor, Ian ran off to his car. "I'll bring your car back in 3 days!" Ian yelled, getting into his black Mercedes and driving off.
"Damn it... I'll have to call headquarters later.... Right now I need a beer," Misato sighed, walking to the elevator. 'I can't believe my teacher is an Angel!' Shinji thought, walking into his room and closing the door. Suddenly, the cellphone Misato gave him rang. "Hello?" Shinji said into it. "Don't tell any of the students what you saw, alright?" Zakku's voice said, then he hung up. "...why are all these strange things suddenly happening to me?" Shinji sighed, laying down on his bed.
- - -
"I can't believe you two did that! You pretty much screwed up the entire operation! Now we're going to have to go through a lot to straighten all of this out!" Lucius roared. "Go fuck a goat! I'm going to bed!" Zakku said, walking off. "Why you...!" Lucius said, running after him, only to be stopped by Shade's pistol. "We'd have had him reveal it sooner or later, now stand down," he said calmly. Lucius backed away, then sat down in his chair at the bridge. "If you two pull another stunt like that again, I'll throw you two in the brig. Be sure to let the Lieutenant know that," Shade said, then sat down as well. Ian grinned and walked off, "Well, this was fun." He walked into the ship's bar and sat down next to Anba and Zakku. "Today was fun!" they all said at the same time, then laughed.
- - -
"Hello? Ritsuko, I just had an Angel inside my house!" Misato said, sitting down with the phone in her hand. "This is a really odd time to joke about something like that," Ritsuko said, sounding slightly amused. "I mean it! Shinji's new teacher was just here, and I saw him grow angel's wings. Shinji told me he said he has to take this drug to hide them." Ritsuko smiled slightly, "Well, I'll be sure to tell the commander. Good-bye!" She hung up, then walked towards the commadner's office. She knocked on it, and was welcomed with, "Come in." Ritsuko straightened her lab clothes before opening the door, "Captain Katsuragi just called saying she had an Angel inside her house. She said it was Shinji's new teacher at his school." Gendou was wearing his infamous amber-tinted sunglasses and his white gloves. They were folded in front of his face.
Gendou smiled behind his hands, "That still doesn't end the scenario. It's merely changed. I suppose we'll just have to deal with this new playing piece." Fuyutski was standing beside him as usual, "Rei also called saying she sensed something about her teacher. But if he's the newest Angel, why hasn't he attacked us?" Gendou chuckled, "We'll find out soon enough."
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Evil bastard, isn't he? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, maybe I'm having too much fun. I don't know if they are strictly on character, but they are close enough to it. Updates next week.
This week's quote: "Your music sounded like a bird getting caught in a blender..." - Cutter Slade (Outcast, the PC GAME, NOT THE FAGGOT HIP HOP DUDE!)
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"I still can't believe you did that," Zakku groaned, rubbing his face. "It's supposed to be romantic, you moron! I'm not going to let you touch me unless you come up with something romantic!" Avira said, untying his feet. Apparently, Zakku had pushed his luck and got tied up so he couldn't get near her. "Now I don't want to get close to you! You fucking tied me up and tossed me into a corner of the room!" Zack said as he stood up, then looked at her in her underwear, "You might want to put-- OW! DAMN IT! Must be your period, huh?" Avira raised her hand like she was going to slap him again, and Zack backed up into the door, which opened, and Ian poked his head out from behind the control panel. "I just thought... Uh," he just stared at Avira in her underwear.
"IAN NO BAKA HENTAI!" Zakku yelled, booting his friend in the stomach. Ian fell over, holding his gut, "That hurts, you know! And what the fuck is 'buku hanta'?" Zakku tried to pull his hair out, "MY PRONOUNCIATION ISN'T THAT BAD! ARGHHH!" Anba's laugh could be heard as she walked down the hall, "Yes, it is! Although you DID get that right. Baka is stupid, hentai is pervert, Ian. Both of which you are. And I thought we agreed not to speak both languages in the same sentence? It's confusing as hell, not to mention it makes you sound like an ass," Anba said, hugging Zakku as hard as she could. "GAH! ALRIGHT! JUST LET GO!" Zakku yelped. Anba let go, and then looked at the case of drugs, "You need to take another one, don't you? We also need to get the cleaning drone in here for that blood stain on the floor. "GUESS WHAT, ZACK!? WE GET TO GET JOBS! YAY!" Ian stood up and put his chin on her shoulder, "I am your second head."
"AGH! GET OFF OF ME!" Anba screamed, shoving him away. "Since when do we have to get jobs? We can get supplies from the Ragnarok, right?" Ian asked, stopping himself by grabbing the door frame. "We can, we just need to keep an eye on that kid," Anba said, then grinned, "I GET TO WORK IN A CARTOON STUDIO!" Ian laughed, "I get to open the autoshop I wanted!" They looked at Zack, who was flicking Avira in the nose, she'd flick him, wash, rinse, repeat. "...what? I'm only 15, I can't get a job!" Zakku said, then got shoved off the bed by Avira. He got up and shoved her, only in the wrong place. Avira slapped him, leaving a big red handprint as he removed his hand from her chest. "It was worth the pain," Zakku said, grinning. "Oh yeah!? HOW ABOUT THIS!?" Avira said, giving him a pleasant kick in the nads for good measure. Zack fell over, holding his balls. Ian laughed as he squirmed around in agony.
"I'm going to get a job, too?" Avira said, looking at them. "NO! NO WAY!" Zakku yelled, getting up. "Why not?" Anba asked, grinning at him, "Afraid she might meet a guy she likes more than you?" Zakku's eyebrow twitched, as it often did when he was extremely annoyed. "NO! She'll probably get a job at a bar someplace with lots of drug-addicts and... eh heh heh heh," Zakku backed away when he saw the look on Ian's face, "Well, then what the hell am I supposed to do!?" Anba and Ian both hummed, as if thinking, "AH! THAT'S IT!"
(2 days later)
The tires squealed as Zakku made a 90° turn towards the diner. "I can't believe you have to wear that outfit for the next year!" he said through his helmet, looking at the dress in Avira's lap; she was sitting in an attached cart to the side of the bike, and she looked somewhat scared. "Could you please slow down?" she asked, sounding very nervous. "If you hadn't spent so much damn time getting ready, we wouldn't have been late! Now I'm late for work! I have to get to school!" Zakku growled, and stopped in front of the diner. "You're an asshole," Avira said, smiling at him as she got off. "I love you, too! Stay out of trouble! Anything happens, call me on your cellphone!" Zakku said, speeding off.
- - -
"Where's the teacher? He should have been here by now," Hikari said, looking somewhat worried. "Well, maybe he's sick and they had trouble finding a sub," Kensuke said. He stood at 5', with scruffy brown hair and big, round glasses At 4'10", Hikari walked over to the window, her pigtails swaying as she moved, and she shielded her deep, brown eyes from the sun. "Well, what if something happened to him on the way here? Or what if he was really hurt in that incident?" Hikari said, then noticed some complete moron streak into the parking lot like he was running in the Grand Prix. "Woah! That's one awesome-looking bike!" a boy said, and a few other kids moved to look through the window. It was a shiny silver bike with black trim, a Kawasaki Ninja ZX6R (I actually went online to look for a very sexy-looking bike, and I was lucky to come across this Kawasaki, which is my favorite manufacturer. Yes, I love motorcycles!).
The rider was wearing a sky blue jacket with angel wings painted onto the back, with a helmet of the same color (hmmm.... coincidence with the wings? :-) Maybe!). "Maybe that's the guy who's supposed to replace our teacher?" one of the boys said. "What makes you so sure it's a guy?" a girl asked. "Well, it's either a guy or a very flat-chested lady!" one of the other boys said. A few of the kids laughed, The rider took off his helmet, his long brown hair dropping down onto his back, and he shook his head. "He's too young looking to be a teacher!" one of the girls said. "How can you tell? You can't see him good from this view!" another boy said. The man looked at his wrist, then took the keys out of his motorcycle and ran inside, carrying the jacket and helmet, along with what looked like a guiter case.
The kids sat back down, talking amongst themselves. A few minutes later, the bell for first period rang, and Hikari stood up, sighing. "I guess I'll have to do roll call," she said, walking to the folder with the list of names. A faint sound like footsteps and curses were heard, only they were in English. The door slid open, and Hikari turned around. "I'm sor-- Why are you so late!? Students are supposed to be here before homeroom period ends!" she yelled. The boy before her smiled, his voice had a heavy American accent, "Please get back to your seat, miss. I believe that's MY desk." Hikari glared at him, "I know you're a student! Now sit down!" The boy's eyes narrowed, "Excuse me? I suggest you sit down before I throw your ass into detention, you here me? I'm the new teacher, since your previous one is in the hospital. Now sit down and shut your mouth!" Hikari stared at him, her mouth hanging open, then sat down, "Sorry, sir."
"It's alright, don't get all mopey," the boy said, walking to the teacher's desk and leaning his guitar case against the wall, hanging his helmet on the top, and his jacket on the chair. "Okay, everyone, sit down!" the man said. No one heard him. "HEY! SIT DOWN!" he said louder, but no one heard him because of the shouting. The man grabbed his guitar case and slammed it onto the floor as hard as he could, making a loud booming sound that made all of the students except Rei and Shinji jump. "Now sit down!" he said, and everyone did. Everyone was staring at the white dress shirt and black pants he was wearing. Then a boy laughed, "You had us going for a second there. Where's the teacher?" The young man walked over to the student, who looked up at him, "You're looking at him. No, I'm not kidding, so don't open your mouth. And stop staring at my earrings, because they aren't for sale." Everyone was looking at them now, the silver sword earrings.
"My name is Zachary Duarte. Yes, I'm 15 years old. I already have my degrees, so don't worry about it. Don't start calling me sensei or something, Zakku will do just fine. And take those headphones off," Zakku said, grabbing the yardstick and lifting the headphones off Shinji's head, since he was daydreaming. Shinji finally came back to Earth, and stared at Zakku, "You're the guy who saved me when that monster came towards me." Zakku laughed, "How'd ya like the ride? Thrilling enough for you?" Everyone looked at the two, back and forth. Zakku leaned on the yardstick, then looked around. "So, you guys take out your textbooks, or do I just teach you?" Hikari spoke up before anyone else had the chance, "we're studying Second Impact and the effects it had on Earth." Zakku sighed, "Second Impact this, Second Impact that. I bet that's all you kids learn about, right?" Everyone nodded.
"Alright! Tell you what! To hell with Second Impact! Let's pretend it never happened!" Zakku said, starting to walk around the classroom. Everyone looked surprised, and he laughed, "That's right, it never happened. What do YOU want to learn about? And I want it to do with history. You'll basically be repeating the same thing with math anyway. If you want math, you can see me after school for it. But in this room during school hours, it's history ONLY. Now, what do you want to learn about in history?" Hands shot up, although it wasn't even half the class. "Oooh, I know! How about fuedal Japan, where corrupt politics and crazy assassins ran around chopping people up!" Zakku said, and a few people looked angry. "Don't get offended, I'll make fun of all people eventually. How about World War II, where a crazy white bastard decided any people against him should die, only his people were the only ones dying BECAUSE HE HAD THEM SIT IN A DAMN HOLE ALL DAY!?" Zakku said, and a few of the angry looks went away.
"Or how about the American's Civil War, where a bunch of rednecks and racists decided it'd be nice to fight each other because black people were in slavery. 'Oh yeah, it's wrong to let you be in slavery, but we're going to treat you like shit for the next 100 years!' Of course, every single person back in America now does drugs becaue they are all complete morons, just like back then!" Zakku said, then pointed to a girl's hand who was up, "What's your first name and what do you want to learn?" The girl spoke softly, barely above a whisper, "My name is Mari... What about ancient Egypt?" Zakku put his hand to his ear, "I'm sorry, what's that?" The girl spoke louder, but it was still very soft, "My name is Mari and I want to know about ancient Egypt." Zakku said loudly in her ear, "I'm sorry! Could you speak louder?!" The girl spoke louder, finally at a decent volume, "My name is Mari and I want to learn about ancient Egypt!" Zakku nodded and patted her on the shoulder, "That's better! You can't state your opinions if you speak as if you were dying. What about you?" He pointed to a boy in the very back.
"My name is Kazuki and I want to learn about the Renaissance," the boy said. "Ahh, Raphael, Michealangelo, Donatello, and Leonardo da Vinci.... all great artists," Zakku said, nodding his head as he made his way to the front of the room, "What about you, Shinji?" Shinji looked up nervously, then his glance shot back down, "I don't know..." Zakku grabbed his chin and lifted his glance up to his face. "You've gotta start looking people in the eye. I get nervous often and do that too, but you have to learn to resist it." He let go and sat on the teacher's desk. Zakku picked up a piece of chalk and chucked it straight at the mirror used for make-up from a girl's hand. "Pay attention in my class or I'll start throwing larger things, like my guitar!" he said, grinning, "Now, what do you want to learn about?" The girl shrugged, picking up her mirror, "Who cares about school? It's not like we need it."
Zakku sighed, then threw another piece of chalk, knocking the mirror out of her hand as she tried to put the make-up on again, "Put that away. Now. We need school because human culture depends on intelligence and knowledge. Unless you'd rather marry a complete moron and live in a cave?" The girl laughed, "I don't need school. My father is a long way away from poor." Zakku sighed, "Every school I go to has a girl like you. Alright, let's say your father goes bankrupt and you have to make your OWN money. What are you going to do without an education? You're going to end up living on the streets." The girl shrugged, "Plenty of rich guys out there." Everyone was looking at her as if she were a complete ditz (coughtootruecough). Zakku merely made a cough sound that sounded strangely close to "bitch".
"Alright, y'know what? No class today. We're just going to plan for the year and get to know each other. First, however, I want to introduce you to THIS," Zakku said, holding up a small black case that he withdrawed from his jacket, "This contains a drug I have to take every 6 hours. To anyone else besides me, it is a lethal dosage. Unless you want to die, I DO NOT suggest you take one of these. You won't get a high either, so don't try it. You'll just die within the next five seconds of taking it. And THIS--" Zakku held out a syringe filled with a white liquid, "--is also something you don't want to take. Unless, of course, you want to grow a third arm and have something like a Child of Fillidimai (I hope I spelled that right! e-mail me with the correct spelling if I didn't)." Zakku's vision became hazy. He put the white syringe in the case and pulled out the black syringe.
"Anyone who has a weak stomach, I suggest you turn away RIGHT now!" Zakku said, and a number of girls and a couple of guys turned away. Zakku put the syringe into his neck and injected the fluid, then pulled it out and braced himself. He fell to his knees and vomitted blood onto the floor, which he grabbed a paper towel used to clean the chalk board and wiped it up. "Okay, you can turn around now!" Zakku said, tossing the blood-soaked towel into the trash. The students turned around and looked around, specifically at their teacher, who was still sweating. "Are you alright?" one of the guys asked, getting up just incase. "I'm fine, so sit down!" Zakku said, then wiped the sweat off his forehead, then looked around. "Alright, who's next to tell me what they want to learn?"
- - -
"Drawing the same thing 500 times gets boring really fast," Anba said, sighing as she placed her pencil down. The man next to her laughed, "You've broken my record by complaining on the first day. You work really fast, too!" Anba shook her head, "Well, it's the SAME thing, only with slight variations. I've got a finger cramp." The man shook his head, then looked at the clock, "Ah, it's lunch time! C'mon, I know a good place to eat!" Anba watched him for a moment, "If you're trying to ask me out, I have a boyfriend already. Er... what was your name again?" The man laughed again, "Oh, geez! My name is Haru. And I have a girlfriend, so don't worry." Anba laughed and walked past him, "Alright, then! Let's go eat!"
"There's a restaurant right near here that makes really good food!" Haru yelled as he ran towards his SUV. "It looks like a cardboard box," Anba said, cracking up as she looked at the black box-style SUV. "Haha, laugh it up. It might be a decade old, but I like it!" Haru said, starting the engine as she got in. "Now.... TO THE RESTAURANT!" Anba pointed forward, yelling.
- - -
The shop's bell rang, and Ian attempted to poke his head up, only to smack it on the bottom of the car. "Damn it... COMING!" Ian yelled, rolling out from under the old Volkswagen he was fixing up. Ian strode into the waiting room, which held all the parts and whatnot on display. The first thing he noticed was purple. The purple hair, the red chest jacket that stopped just between her chest and her hips, the black shirt and miniskirt to go with it and the brown eyes he was staring into. All of this made one thing cross his mind-- "Holy shit!" Ian said, stepping back when he saw Misato Katsuragi standing there. "Do I know you? Or are you astounded by my good looks?" she joked, making a pose. Ian laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. "Well, what do you damn it!" Ian said. Misato looked at him as if he were on crack, "You're not very good with Japanese, are you?"
"Nope," Ian said, then laughed again. "I need you to fix up the body of my car. If there are any parts I need to replace I don't care, just don't hurt it. It's a classic!" Misato said, then looked at Ian, who was already checking out the car. "I haven't seen one of these in years! I'll only charge you ¥10,000 for labor. I can't believe I get to work on one of these! Anyway, what's your name? Mine's Ian!" Ian said, grinning. "Like I said, don't hurt my car. If you do, I'll have to hurt you. And my name is Misato Katsuragi," Misato said, looking him over. 'Atleast I found a mechanic that doesn't weigh 400 lbs and doesn't stink. He's not that bad-looking... Sort of looks like... Ugh, why am I thinking about him!?' Misato thought. "Uh, Misato?" Ian said, waving his hand in front of her. Misato looked at him nervously and smiled, "Uh, yes?" Ian raised a brow at the look, but dismissed it, "You can come back to pick your car up in 3 days, It might be more, though. This thing is really messed up!"
"Yeah, I know. It's because of that Angel attack," Misato said, putting venom into the word 'Angel'. Ian nodded a bit, "Something tells me those Angels are going to be a pain in the ass. There's supposed to be 17, right?" Misato looked at him with that strange look again, "Where did you hear that?" Ian shrugged, "I do my research." Misato looked at her watch, "I might as well take the rest of the day off, since it's too far to walk to NERV. Mind if I stay here?" Ian shook his head as he began pushing her car into the empty garage, "I.... don't mind.... one.... bit! Damn this thing is stubborn!" Misato laughed and held up the keys. "Oh.... yeah.... we could do that too.... Er... I mean.... NOT THAT KIND OF DOING! DON'T HIT ME!" Ian said, placing his hands on his crotch, drawing a grin from Misato.
"That's reserved only for my special man," Misato said, winking at him. "Hitting on me won't lower the price any further, Ms. Katsuragi!" Ian said, blushing as Misato laughed, driving the car into the garage. Ian held his arm up, forming a fist, and mouthed, "Yes!" to the sky.
- - -
"So, which one do you think is cuter, that new student or the new teacher?" a girl with long black hair asked the girl sitting beside her. "I think the teacher's kind of cute, but then again he's a teacher, so I'd only be able to ask out that new kid!" the girl said. Shinji overheard this, and was still wondering about something. 'Why was I picked to pilot EVA? Why couldn't anyone else do it?' he though, although no voice spoke back to him in his mind. He noticed Ayanami was looking out of the window of the classroom. She hadn't left the classroom to go eat lunch. Shinji's thoughts were disrupted by a loud guitar being played, along with someone singing.
Rei turned around, looking at the teacher, who was playing very loudly on his electric guitar. It looked like it was from the 60's and it was painted a shiny black. It was finely tuned, not sounding bitter or loose like guitars did if they were not maintained. Zakku was singing his heart out in English, although his headphones and closed eyes made him oblivious to everything around him as he played while sitting on his desk.
"so-a one, two, three! Tell me how it's gonna be because you look so fine that I really want to make you mine! I said you look so fine that I really wanna make you mine! Four, five, six! C'mon, now get your kicks! Now, you don't need the money when you look like that, do ya honey? Big black boots, long brown hair, she's so sweet with her 'get-back' stare! Well, I can see you home with me, but you are with another man yeah~! I know we ain't got much to say before I let you get away~, yeah! I said are you gonna be my girl? so-a one, two, three! Tell me how it's gonna be because you look so fine that I really want to make you mine! I said you look so fine that I really wanna make you mine! Four, five, six! C'mon, now get your kicks! Now you don't need the money with a face like that, do ya? Big black boots, long brown hair, she's so sweet with her 'get-back' stare! Well, I can see you home with me, but you are with another ma~n, yeah~! I know we ain't got much to say, before I let you get away~, YE--" Zakku stopped singing when he noticed all of his students sitting in front of him again.
"Er... don't mind me! I was just..... er.... crap!" Zakku said, turning off his headphones and putting his guitar away. "Why'd you stop singing? You're pretty damn good!" one of the guys said. "I am an amateur compared to my cousin. He used to give out CDs to friends and family, and he usually made fun of stuff, but he was very good at it!" Zakku said, then noticed the girl with mirror again, trying to put on her make-up. "I warned you to put that away," Zakku said, drawing her attention away from the mirror before she looked back again. Zakku sighed, then grabbed the yardstick from the desk, then went back to her and smacked it upwards out of her hand, then smashed it, using the yardstick as a baseball bat. "If you need to put on make-up, do it during lunch, before school, or after school. NOT while classes are in!" he said, glaring down at her. "You're going to have to pay for that," she said, giving him a dirty look.
"Not in my opinion. I warned you atleast twice today to not put make-up on in here. I don't believe in that 'take it away for a day' crap because kids get their stuff back, then do it again the next day. Remember that I'm still a kid, even if I am your teacher," Zakku said, then looked around, "So, what should we start on first?" Hands went up, and the lesson started.
- - -
"Finally! A teacher who can actually get us to understand something!" one of the girls said as she walked into the hall, making Zakku smile as he got all of his stuff together. "Uh.... sir?" a voice said, and Zakku turned around to face Shinji. "Just Zakku. I'm not an old man, I'm your age. Now what is it?" Zakku said, putting his jacket on. "Do you think you could teach me to play the guitar?" Shinji asked, looking down slightly. Zakku grinned and pulled his face upwards so they were eye to eye, "Stop doing that! And yes, I can teach you. You look like the kind of kid who likes Pachelbenon and Beethoven, though." Shinji looked at him with a surprised look, "How did you know?" Zakku laughed, "Lucky guess! Now get out of here, I have to go pick up my girlfriend from work." He shoved Shinji out the door, then ran out into the hall with his guitar case in hand, sliding the door closed.
"I'll teach you on Wednesdays, alright? See ya!" Zakku said, then dashed off. "He is really a strange person," Shinji said, walking out of the school. 'He seems to know a lot about me... Maybe he works for NERV?' Shinji said, then saw Zakku shoot off in his motorcycle, nearly running a couple of girls over as he swerved around the fence. Shinji then saw a man with black sunglasses in a black van. Shinji ignored it and began walking home. The sound of a van running followed. Shinji looked behind him and saw the black van from before. Shinji turned away again and began walking faster. The sound still followed. Shinji ran and turned around a corner, and the van followed him. He ran as fast as he could, running straight for home. He ran to the elevator, pushing the button, then looked behind him to see the van stop in front of the condo.
The elevator door opened, and he went inside, then pushed the button for his floor. The elevator sooned reached his floor and he walked to the door, then slipped his keycard through it, then stepped in. "Hello, Shinji!" Misato said cheerfully, opening a can of Yebisu beer and handing it to an unfamiliar looking man. "Uh.... hello," Shinji said shyly. Ian waved his hand, "Yo! What's up?" Shinji shrugged, "Do you live here, too?" Ian nearly choked on his beer, shaking his head, "No! I'm just fixing Misato's car and I drove her home." Shinji stood there for a moment, then walked into the living room, "Well, I'm going to watch TV." Misato blocked his path with her arm, "Where's your homework?" Shinji shrugged again, "We have a new teacher because our old one is hospitalized. He said we won't have any homework."
"Oh, really? My friend Zack just started teaching today at a junior highschool!" Ian said. "You know Mr. Zakku?" Shinji asked, and Ian was about to answer when his cellphone rang. "Uh... Sorry! Hello?" Ian said into the phone. "Look out! I'm coming to get you!" a raspy voice said. Ian laughed, "Nice try, dumbass. That won't work on me." He was just about to take the phone away from his ear when he saw a red dot on Misato's forehead, watching it move from time to time. "GET DOWN!" Ian said, dropping the phone and pouncing Misato. "AGHHH! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Misato screamed. Laughter erupted from the phone. "I GOT YOU, BITCH!" the voice yelled, then laughed again. "Zack, you son of a bitch!" Ian yelled as he grabbed the phone. "WHASSUP, MAH NIGGA!?" Zakku yelled, then laughed and pointed at him from across the street on the roof of a house. "Mr. Zakku!?" Shinji yelled, running to the balcony.
"Hey, Shinji!" Zakku yelled, waving, then jumped off of the roof of the building, landing on the street below. "WHAT THE HELL!?" Shinji screamed, looking down at the boy, who still stood on two feet. "A fall like that would kill a normal person!" Misato said, looking down as she walked to the balcony. "That's Zack for you! Then again, he shouldn't pull stunts like this so early in the evening," Ian said, waving down to the boy. Zakku ran to the elevator and got in, then got off at Shinji's floor. "You're so dead, you know that?" Ian said, grabbing his friend by the collar and yanking him out of the elevator and into a headlock. "You two know each other?" Misato asked, looking from one to the other.
"Yeah, we've been friends since we were kids!" Zakku said, biting his friend's arm to get released. Ian complied, then wiped his arm on his pants. "That's so gross!" he groaned, wiping the last of the saliva off. The clicking of a pistol's safety made them both raise their arms up. "You HAD to jump off that roof, didn't you? Now she's going to kill us!" Ian said. "What and who are you two!?" Misato asked, staring the two down. Zakku looked at the casings of beer outside the door, "I'll tell you if you give me a beer." Shinji stared at him, "Eh!?" Zakku nodded, "Yes, I drink." Misato nudged her head for the two of them to get inside, which they did, only Zakku was walking casually.
"YES! BEER! MWAHAHAHAHA!" Zakku said, opening the fridge and taking one out, then downed the entire can. "Ahhh! This stuff's pretty good!" he said, then tossed it into the trash. Misato closed the door, "Sit down and explain all this. How the hell did you jump off a roof and live!?" Zakku sighed, sitting down, "Should we REALLY tell them?" Ian gave him a glare, "You wanted the beer, so you explain. I could've ran!" Zakku sighed, and looked at the case after pulling it out of his back pocket. "Ah, hell. It's almost time to take them. Wait for five minutes, then you'll see!" Zakku said, putting it on the table. "Fine. Just don't move!" Misato said, keeping the pistol pointed at them. Five minutes passed, and Zakku began sweating.
"You'd better stand up, or they'll break the chair," Ian sighed. Zakku got up, and the excruciating pain came, making him fall to his hands and knees. He vomitted blood and began trembling. Two large bumps were pressing against the back of his shirt, which soon ripped, and his wings folded out. "You're... an angel!?" Shinji yelled, staring. "Yeah, I am. WHOAH! PUT THAT THING DOWN! I'M NOT ONE OF THOSE BIG MONSTERS!" Zakku yelled, stepping back as Misato stood up. "Like hell you aren't! You've got angel's wings for god's sake!" Misato yelled, pointing the pistol at his head. Ian grabbed her arms and twisted them back, "We're on your side! Zack's not going to change into one of those big monsters! He's not here to kill anyone... Unless you're not telling me something?"
"I'm betting you've noticed that ship in orbit. That's ours. We work for an organization that's here to help NERV out," Zakku said, "I can't really tell you anything big. But just so you know, the monsters aren't really who you think they are." He walked to the table, grabbed his case, then walked onto the balcony and flew off. "ZACK! YOU MORON! You're gonna get us both killed.... Sorry, Misato! Love you! Bye bye," Ian said quickly, running to the door and unlocking it, then running out before Misato could shoot at him. "Come back here!" Misato yelled, picking up the pistol and running after him. Ian was already in the elevator and the doors closed before she could get to it. Misato ran down the stairs, trying to catch up to him. When the elevator reached the ground floor, Ian ran off to his car. "I'll bring your car back in 3 days!" Ian yelled, getting into his black Mercedes and driving off.
"Damn it... I'll have to call headquarters later.... Right now I need a beer," Misato sighed, walking to the elevator. 'I can't believe my teacher is an Angel!' Shinji thought, walking into his room and closing the door. Suddenly, the cellphone Misato gave him rang. "Hello?" Shinji said into it. "Don't tell any of the students what you saw, alright?" Zakku's voice said, then he hung up. "...why are all these strange things suddenly happening to me?" Shinji sighed, laying down on his bed.
- - -
"I can't believe you two did that! You pretty much screwed up the entire operation! Now we're going to have to go through a lot to straighten all of this out!" Lucius roared. "Go fuck a goat! I'm going to bed!" Zakku said, walking off. "Why you...!" Lucius said, running after him, only to be stopped by Shade's pistol. "We'd have had him reveal it sooner or later, now stand down," he said calmly. Lucius backed away, then sat down in his chair at the bridge. "If you two pull another stunt like that again, I'll throw you two in the brig. Be sure to let the Lieutenant know that," Shade said, then sat down as well. Ian grinned and walked off, "Well, this was fun." He walked into the ship's bar and sat down next to Anba and Zakku. "Today was fun!" they all said at the same time, then laughed.
- - -
"Hello? Ritsuko, I just had an Angel inside my house!" Misato said, sitting down with the phone in her hand. "This is a really odd time to joke about something like that," Ritsuko said, sounding slightly amused. "I mean it! Shinji's new teacher was just here, and I saw him grow angel's wings. Shinji told me he said he has to take this drug to hide them." Ritsuko smiled slightly, "Well, I'll be sure to tell the commander. Good-bye!" She hung up, then walked towards the commadner's office. She knocked on it, and was welcomed with, "Come in." Ritsuko straightened her lab clothes before opening the door, "Captain Katsuragi just called saying she had an Angel inside her house. She said it was Shinji's new teacher at his school." Gendou was wearing his infamous amber-tinted sunglasses and his white gloves. They were folded in front of his face.
Gendou smiled behind his hands, "That still doesn't end the scenario. It's merely changed. I suppose we'll just have to deal with this new playing piece." Fuyutski was standing beside him as usual, "Rei also called saying she sensed something about her teacher. But if he's the newest Angel, why hasn't he attacked us?" Gendou chuckled, "We'll find out soon enough."
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Evil bastard, isn't he? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, maybe I'm having too much fun. I don't know if they are strictly on character, but they are close enough to it. Updates next week.