Sonic Series Fan Fiction ❯ Because of You ❯ Forgiveness ( Chapter 7 )

Disclaimer: None of the characters in this story belong to me, they belong to somebody else

 

Because of You

 

Everything is numb. Cold, numb and empty. The doctor had left a while ago, leaving me with the most important decision of my life. It's a cold realization, in which my baby could die if I chose to save my life. It's… just painful.

 

Yet I feel so different now. Numb, in pain, yet a part of me shines in happiness. One tiny shred, but it doesn't go by unnoticed.

 

I can smile whenever I think of him now, instead of filling myself with complete rage over something he couldn't help prevent. My feelings have rapidly changed, and I don't think I can stop it, and I don't think I want to either. I still feel some sort of pain from that night, but it's not as hurting as it seemed at first.

 

I wish he were here now. Then I can tell him how sorry I am. Then I can tell him how much of a great influence he has been on my life and how I never want to let him think I've hurt him.

 

I still feel hurt by that night though. He could have handled that situation better. He could have merely hugged me and told me he cared, instead of practically strapping me to the bed. But I'm also glad he did it somehow, in a way I can't explain.

 

All these thoughts of Sonic cheer me up. It takes my mind off of the numb realization that my baby could die. Our baby. All of a sudden, I want to share this burden with him. Let him be a part of our lives again. Go back to the way things were before.

 

No, I want to go further. I want things to change. Too long has my life been all about me, in the workshop, just the clever Foxboy that works on inventions. I want to be someone more. I want to get out there and let people see me for who I really am. And I want Sonic right by my side.

 

But will he forgive me?

 

I hope so. I want him back. I can only dream of being with the only person that made me feel whole and pure. Like I could accomplish anything I put my mind to. Yeah, it's a perfect dream, but he's probably too hurt to want me to be his friend again.

 

I wish he were here now. So I could weep into his arms the way I used to when I was a kid. And he would hold me and whisper sweet nothings into my ear. I could glide my hands through that soft, sweet smelling blue fur and gaze forever into those pure green eyes.

 

I've changed my tune. I laugh when I remember only a few days ago; I'd give anything for Sonic to be punished, to pay for what he did. But he never did anything, I know that.

 

And I did what I did because I had to. She showed me that. I feel so content and sane for the first time in my life since Cosmo's death. I know now I can let her go and love her all the same, yet love Sonic too.

 

The doctor's have been fussing over me for ages. I want to be left alone. It's my burden. It's up to me and me alone to choose whether or not I want the transfusion done. I'm the one carrying the baby and I'm the one in need of the transfusion.

 

On one hand, if I say yes and agree to the transfusion, I could get better and leave this hospital. But chances are high that my baby could die.

 

On the other hand, if I said yes and disagreed to having the transfusion, I could die as well as my baby. It seems like there's only one way to go, doesn't it? But why do I feel like I can't?

 

So I lay here. The doctor's expect me to make up my mind. My transfusion's this afternoon. I need it to live, so my baby could live. But why can't I come out and say it?

 

“God I'm so torn!” I sighed exasperatedly, slumping back into the pillow. I roll over onto and snuggle into it, memories of that night coming back again. I remember after the deed was done and Sonic lay in my arms. It was such a warm feeling. I wonder if he felt what I felt that night. The feeling of finding that special person.

 

Guilt fills my stomach as I remember the events of yesterday. Amy, crying at my bedside, pouring her heart out about Sonic breaking up with her, telling her he loved someone else. And for all I know that person Sonic loves now could be me.

 

I wonder what Amy's reaction would be. I imagined her screaming and yelling at me, tears pouring down red cheeks, shouting that she trusted me when she confided in me, and that I had betrayed her. I shiver, imagining what else she could do. Probably attack me with that hammer of hers.

 

Love is such a horrible game at times. People's hearts can rip in two, like mine did after Cosmo's death. And like Amy's heart will do when she finds out the truth.

 

I sigh and gaze at the ceiling, “I'm sorry Amy…”

 

At that moment, the dog doctor entered the room again. I gotta hand it to him, he did a good job of keeping me as well as I could be when I was here. He approached me and sat down on my bed, looking at my pale complexion, “How are you doing today?”

 

I nodded slightly, “I'm okay I guess…”

 

“That's great. We need to know now, are you going through with the transfusion? Because there is a free slot for you to have it done now, and your blood donor is waiting outside,”

 

I lay there, my eyes gazing ahead. I'm still not sure of what I want, though it seems clear to me what the best decision was. I look down, “I still don't know what I want…”

 

The dog sighed, “Well, your donor's waiting outside and he said he wanted to speak with you. Of course, seeing as how you reacted earlier towards his visits we find it highly inappropriate but it's your call.”

 

I have a fleeting hope that it's who I think it is. I nodded, “Yeah, I'll talk with him.”

 

The dog nodded and left the room. Minutes later, my heart started pounding as Sonic walked into the room nervously. I try to fight back a smile as Sonic sat beside me. The doctor stood at the door, watching everything. I throw a glare at him, “Can we be left in private please?”

 

The dog shrugged, stalking out of the room with his nose in the air. I swear I could have laughed at that sight. It'd feel great to laugh again.

 

There is silence. There were so many things I wanted to say to Sonic when I saw him. I even rehearsed it in my head. But now, all the words have been erased and I'm confused at what I want to say to him now. I gather up my courage and think about what I want to be said, and it was staring me in the face all along. The obvious thing to say…

 

“I'm sorry,” I said slowly, before it caught my attention that Sonic had said it at the same time. I fight back a blush, as Sonic's eyes landed on his shoes.

 

“Tails, I… I'm so sorry, I should never have said what I did and I should never have done what I did that night and…”

 

“Sonic… can you let me say what I have to say?” I asked kindly. I have to say this to him now. He has to know I don't hate him anymore. Sonic's face falls to the ground and he nodded slowly.

 

“Sonic… you were right. I did kill Cosmo,” I started. Sonic was about to interrupt with an objection but I held my hand up wearily to silence him, “But it was for the good of the universe, and she wanted it to be that way,”

 

Sonic blinked and I saw this as my chance to continue, “I should never have blamed you for what happened to Cosmo, nor should I have overreacted when you tried to see me and make it up to me. I'm an idiot… forgive me?”

 

Sonic's clearly stunned. He obviously didn't expect an apology from me. He expected me to rant and tell him to get out of my life. I can tell that so easily. Sonic eventually nodded, “Yeah… I forgive you little buddy… if you forgive me…?”

 

I shook my head, “No, there's nothing to be forgiven in your case Sonic…”

 

“Yes there was. I should never have done what I did that night. I hurt you and now you're lying here and…” Sonic broke off, unable to continue with his words. He pointed at my belly shakily. He looks so confused and hurt as he leaned closer to me, “I-Is it mine?”

 

I nodded straight away. It's time I was honest with him, and let him in. After all, it was his baby too and it could die in this transfusion. Sonic looked at the floor again, silent for a few minutes.

“I'm sorry I did that to you Tails…” Sonic said slowly, almost trying not to cry.

 

“Don't be. What's done is done and it's in the past… I want things to go back to normal, or somewhere near that,” I kindly replied, reaching a hand over to stroke Sonic's cheek, and I caught a few tears on my glove.

 

“Don't cry, that's not the Sonic I know,” I manage a smile, as Sonic looks into my eyes with a weak grin.

 

“You're right,” Sonic stated, wiping his tears away with his arm. He grinned at me, with that true smile that was Sonic the Hedgehog.

 

Silence followed. Everything was forgiven. We were friends again.

 

“So the transfusion's in a few minutes huh?” Sonic asked, sighing in a nervous tone. I nodded in answer to his question. Sonic sighed again and put on a smile.

 

“You don't have to do it if you don't want to, they'll find another blood donor,” I pointed out to the shaking hedgehog, who grinned at me.

“No Tails,” he said to me in a calm tone, “It'll be okay. You're my best friend, and I can't let you die… and I can't let,” Sonic pointed at my belly again, “I can't let our kid die.”

 

“Chances are it might though, but I… I want to take this chance,” I said, my mind coming to the decision. I couldn't live without Sonic by my side. It's a win-win opportunity that I have to take.

Sonic leaned forward a little bit, “Then take it…”

 

I think for a while, and then nod. Sonic is right. This is the only chance I'm going to get to live. I have to take it, “I'll do it Sonic.”

 

Sonic smiled weakly, grabbing my hand and stroking it. The warmth is beyond anything I have ever felt before. I smiled as he leant down and gazed into my eyes. I was ready for it this time. And I wanted it.

 

Our lips met for the first time since that night all those weeks ago. My hands automatically glide through his soft, sweet smelling fur, and quills as Sonic stroked my unclean messy fur. Everything seems to be going the way I wanted it. Everything's going back to normal.

 

Or at least, as normal as it could be.

 

We break off from our short kiss and I take the opportunity to gaze into his green eyes. They're so pure and sweet, how could I have once hated them and the hedgehog that came with them?

 

“I really care about you Tails,” Sonic admitted, blushing furiously, covering his face as best he could.

 

“That's why you broke up with Amy, wasn't it? Because you-” I started, but never got the chance to continue.

 

“Because I love you,” Sonic finished, blushing an awful lot. What can he see in me? I'm a fourteen year old kid, who cut himself in depression. He's a twenty-one year old man, who always manages to stay happy, no matter what.

 

I could ask, but emotion was taking over, “I love you too Sonic.”

 

He smiled at me and leant toward me again. Everything felt so right with him, though guaranteed many people would say it's wrong. Our lips were about to touch again when the door opened, and Sonic leapt back into his seat.

 

The doctor had entered the room again, looking very serious, “Well Mr. Prower, is it a yes or a no?”

 

I glance at Sonic, who gives me a warm reassuring smile. I know what I want now. I'd have to take the risk, “I'll do it.”

 

The dog smiled at me, as I smiled at Sonic, grabbing his hand in enthusiasm, “Well let's get on with it then shall we?”

 

As I'm led along to the room while Sonic's being prepared, my fears are dispelled. Every little bit of hatred is gone, as is the depression.

 

I know I'll make it through okay. Sonic's love will guide me back to the light.