Vision Of Escaflowne Fan Fiction ❯ Secrets ❯ Questions ( Chapter 2 )

Secrets

Chapter Two

Questions

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"Why?" the word sounded as though it was strangled out of his mouth and Allen Schezar, Heavenly Knight of Caeli, could do nothing but gape at his sister with an expression made of a mixture of shock and horror on his face. What little light there was in his study at two in the morning was enough for Celena to gauge her brother's expression with. Not seeing any anger or disappointment on his face, she felt more able to continue with what she had set out to do. Or at least what she had set out to say to him.

"Because, Allen, I don't deserve and I don't want to continue on like this," she said quietly. Normally, she would have to shout over his constant attempts to change the topic whenever something regarding Dilandau was said; now her voice was barely above a whisper but she knew he heard her. Allen was finally listening.

"He has more of a life, more of a…right to live than I do," she was choosing her words carefully. The slightest mistake, one slip in her choice of words could take them back to square one. She continued on bravely, feeling almost spurred on by a voice at the back of her mind, Dilandau's voice. "I have nothing to live for, I have no life but he does. Dilandau has so much he ought to live for and he…he knows how to live."

Allen sat silently in the shadows of the chair he occupied, not moving, not saying a word. He was silently fuming. Everything his baby sister had said, she didn't know what she was talking about. She had simply had a terrible dream and somehow Dilandau had managed to penetrate into her conscious mind and tell her she didn't deserve to live. This wasn't her choice…was it?

"He knows how to live?" he asked suddenly, making her, making them jump suddenly for Dilandau was as much a part of this conversation as any of the Schezars. "He was a maniac! Do you have any idea what kind of havoc he created? Do you know the kinds of things he did to people? He burnt Van's kingdom to the ground. He tried to kill me! And you want him to live? You don't know what kind of…of monster-" Allen's sentence was cut short by an outburst from Celena.

"YES! I DO KNOW AND I DON'T CARE!" she shouted and it echoed throughout their empty mansion and into the night, a testimony to her unswerving trust in her alter ego. Before Allen was able to open his mouth and get a word in sideways, she continued on.

"Because all that he ever lived for, all that drove him to do what he did and all the horrendous things that was behind his madness, as some love to call it, is gone. His only option is to apologise and start over. I couldn't do it, but I know he can."

"What do you mean you couldn't do it?" Allen asked, eyes narrowed and forehead creased deeply as he contemplated the sentences that his sister had shot at him. "And who could get -Dilandau- to apologise?" he spat the boy's name out like it was poison in his mouth.

"I could." She said simply. All her energy seemingly drained from her frustration and pervious speech.

"And you have how much control over him? The madman kept you locked away for ten years. He took away your life and now you want to let him back out into the world? Celena, dearest sister, are you sure you are alright?" Allen asked raising one eyebrow. For him sarcasm was a rarity but then again, it wasn't everyday your sister told you she wanted to let your ex-would-have-been-murderer back into your life, in your own house, no less.

"He did not keep me 'locked up', as you so kindly put it, brother. He protected me when I needed someone to. He became my strength when the Zaibach 'scientists' were done with me. He is as much a part of me as I am of him and don't you DARE say anything against him! I know he, no we did some horrible things but do you think he enjoyed doing them, liked doing them as-"

She stopped. 'As much as I did?' The end of her sentence stunned her. How on in the world could she ever think something so HORRID? She liked it more than Dilandau did? All of the killing, the war, the blood…she liked it more than he did? Was it really she behind all of the terrible things Dilandau had done? Was she the one who had tried to kill so many people, her own brother included? Was it she who felt the bloodlust for Van?

NO! She knew the answer there. It was Dilandau who wanted Van dead, not her. But it was her vanity, though, her love of their beautiful face, that made Dilandau go after him with such a vengeance. She was the evil, not him.

Do you think he enjoyed doing them, liked doing them as much as I did? Do you think he was half as crazy as I was? Enjoyed it as much as I did? Liked it as much as I did? As much as I did? As I did? As I did! As I did!

Allen saw the expression of horror, of pure and total mortification that settled itself upon his sister's face when she abruptly halted her speech. Her hands flew to her face, mainly her mouth, and she shook her head, trying to clear some terrible, terrible thought from it.

He jumped up off his chair and over his desk in time to catch her limp, falling form.

She had fainted.

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