Yami No Matsuei Fan Fiction ❯ Girl Trouble... ❯ Anxiety ( Chapter 6 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

az:I may rant and shout!! But I tell no lie.... hehehe... Most of my fics contained issues that had a lot to do with myself... and since I've learned a lot of counseling techniques... I tend to delved deeper to know myself through this. Do you know that Tsuzuki and I had so much in common? Same blood type B, both Pisces... likes the same hobbies... terrible in cooking... (I experiments a lot!!) childish... temperamental and some others... Why, we even both born in the year of the rat!! In my lifetime of anime-loving... I never found any characters that matched me so much...!! Tsuzuki here was actually can be said to represent me in so many ways...

Disclaimer: I don't own Yami no Matsuei nor did I own the tankoubons or the anime. Characters and original excerpt from the fic are copyrights of Matsushita Yoko-sensei. No infringements are intended and no grudge was held during this production. The earth would rock and seas parted if I dare write sappy yaoi scenes.... Err, why suddenly it's getting unstable.... lol...

Warning: May contain explicit ideas concerning life philosophies and such... self-condemnation may also be in the row...

Girl Trouble...!!

Anxiety...

Written by Azzie @ Alienna Azuani @ Yami Azzie

'What was that bracelet for? Tsuzuki-san...?'

Tsuzuki sighed as both of them walked towards the main building. 'It's my restriction device...', she said as Tatsumi frowned at her. 'I knew that some of my Shikis could make such device... they made one for Tohda to helped him control his powers. And I felt at ease... knowing that I won't accidentally release my powers at anyone again. Being a girl... I felt more insecure in myself, much more than before... and I think that was the reason that I can't control my powers...'

'...Tsuzuki-san, you shouldn't have done this by yourself. You don't have to restrict yourself like this for our sakes..!! Your powers, we could also help, you know... me, Watari... oops, put him aside!! Even if he could make one, his designs was not actually nice to look...'

Tsuzuki laughed as he agreed on that mere fact. 'But... it's okay. Daioh-sama asked me to find a way to control my powers... and I think this will at least eased Kira-san, next time she comes to visit...'

After uttering that sentence, Tsuzuki suddenly frowned and looked away. '...this power, is not what I usually used... And I had a feeling that this was also not the powers I've gained from my shikigamis. Perhaps... this is the power that I've always had... before I died. I usually could release this energy whenever I was really angry or having really strong emotions... and right now, I couldn't even control my emotions...' And this power... is probably the one that killed everyone....!! The village people... my family...Ruka!!

Tatsumi patted her shoulders as a tear suddenly falls from her cheeks. 'I supposed so... I wouldn't believe this if I hadn't seen that power. When you lost your mind over Ikaruga-san's death... I saw it. That power... fully unleashed, had almost destroyed Meifu. Not counting the help given by SohRyu and the others... Daioh-sama had spoke something about it, but I don't think he's about to tell anyone about it right now...'

'And besides... you don't have to face everything alone...!! You have Hisoka, Watari, Wakaba, Terazuma... to support you. And me...'

I supposed... but Daioh-sama seemed to know something more when he asked me to find some way to control my powers...

Tsuzuki glanced meaningfully at Tatsumi as he suddenly goes mischievous. 'Ha~~~i, what do you think I should do your hair tomorrow?!! Mmm... what about pigtails, ponytails or we just mix around a little...' Tsuzuki blushed as he continued rambling. '...I kinda missed playing around with someone's hair... the last one whom I've always played with was my sister...'

'Aaah, Tatsumi...!!', moaned Tsuzuki. 'I'm not a baby!!!', she cried as Tatsumi grinned...

~Tsuzuki~

Thanks... Tatsumi. I felt better now. The truth was... it was not of Muraki's words that was bothering me...

Daioh-sama's words... gave fear to my very being. Not even the thoughts of the lord caring about me; as he'd always did by ordering Kira to protect me when I'm in grave peril, gave me consolation. His presence demanded me to respect and obeyed him. His orders... is something I should not ignore...!! Sure, I joked about it sometime ago... but I never meant to really take it lightly. Daioh-sama is someone that has a strong hold on me... not someone that I could disrespect with ease...

I was obliged... no, more that I must, to serve him always...

And to think about it, I never confronted 'him' regarding the Kyoto incident...

It's because, I felt terribly afraid of his anger. Having SohRyu to scold me mercilessly is enough for me... I knew that SohRyu cared a lot. He treated me at times like his own child... as he'd always treated the other shikigamis also. But...

I dared not test it with Daioh-sama... since at some point...

...he owned me...

My very existence...

Hakushaku sipped his tea slowly as he marveled at the sight in front of him. 'Really... you, simply a thing of beauty. Even as a woman, you are a sight to behold and enchant...'

Tsuzuki's face went a shade of scarlet at the compliment. 'Hakushaku!! Stop with the flowery words....!! It's giving me shivers...', she said as Hakushaku laughed. 'My apologies... you resembled someone I knew... long time ago...' Tsuzuki gaped at him as she felt again the nostalgic aura surrounding the Earl. Both of them were strangely quiet after that...

-- SHI-----------------------------------------------------------N!!!

'Hakushaku...'

'...do you know something about my powers? Konoe Kacho won't tell me... and I was afraid to ask Daioh-sama...'

'You seemed to know something about me... and you've always talked to the chief...'

Hakushaku's mask shifted as if he was immensely surprised over the sudden question. Tsuzuki's heart skipped a bit as the mask looked down again. 'Sorry... I could not tell you anything...'

'Sou ka...? Wakarimashita...' Tsuzuki's hope dashed again as she averted his glance...

Back at Tsuzuki's apartment...

'Tsuzuki-san... please elope with me...!!'

Tsuzuki immediately fled to the corners of her bedroom, clutching her blanket near her. 'Mu...Muraki..?! You..? Why did you come here..?!!! Why can't you leave me alone...?!!!!' Muraki crept closer to her as he caressed her face. 'Why...? Do you have to ask? I love you... Tsuzuki-san...'

'NO, YOU DIDN'T!!! Go away!!! Heeeelp!!!', she cried as Muraki grabbed and pinned her to the wall. She shook her head wildly as he tried to kissed her. And suddenly, the door was taken down and there emerged Tatsumi!! Calling out to Tsuzuki...

'Tatsumi...!! Help!!', cried Tsuzuki as Tatsumi ran towards them. 'Muraki... let my Tsuzuki GO!!!', drawled Tatsumi as Tsuzuki blushed heavily. Muraki shook his head as he pulled her in a tight embrace. 'Nooooo!! She's mine!! Mmm... what about we share?!', cried Muraki as Tatsumi nodded. Tsuzuki's blood ran cold. And why suddenly, Muraki turned into a 5-year-old baby? Suddenly, Tsuzuki felt her days are numbered as both Tatsumi and Muraki looked so menacing...

'Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!!!', Tsuzuki screamed as she woke up in sweat. She gasped as she realized that it was a bad dream. But then... her blanket felt heavy all of a sudden...

To her horror, Muraki was lying beside her, sleeping. She shrieked again as her head bumped into a hard wall behind her!!

'Aaah!! That hurt!!', she exclaimed as she opened her eyes to find that she's in her room and NO Muraki in sight. She sighed heavily. 'I really HATE these double dreams...'

'Tsuzuki-san...? You've awaken? I heard you screaming... did you have a nightmare? Here... I've made you some porridge. Eating something before going back to sleep might help...'

Tsuzuki was speechless as her mind goes blank with fear. The person looked at her with concern as he walked towards her and sat, putting the bowl aside to check her. But Tsuzuki refused the help.

'No... you don't do anything!!', she gasped as she slapped her own face. Her eyes went wide as she felt pain. 'This is not a dream...', she cried in panic. 'No.. it's not. I'm really here...', said Muraki, smiling as Tsuzuki shook her head again. 'No...!! You were just a figment of my imagination and--' Tsuzuki's hand touched solid as she reached her hands towards Muraki's face. Muraki pulled her hand to touch his cheeks as he grabbed her in an embrace. 'Pity you were wrong...'

'No... I'm not LIKE you!! I'm not a two-timing pros--' Muraki placed his hand against her lips to stop her. 'I never said you were... So, you've finally admitted that you loved me and that Tatsumi?'

Tsuzuki's face flushed. '...Why you!! Why did you act so perverted even when you already had a fiancée? If you really loved her why did you...'

'Who told you...?!!', he gasped as he distanced himself a little. Tsuzuki looked down as she timidly spoke between her teeth. 'Hisoka... did. That time at the Kakyoin ship, Tsubaki-hime told him...'

Muraki sighed as he pulled Tsuzuki closer again. 'I don't know... my feelings for Ukyou is probably the same as yours for Tatsumi-san. We've grew up together and she, other than Oriya, did not treat my like a something strange. But my love for her was different than mine for you. And answering your question, other than you and Ukyou, I was cruel to my victims and I felt nothing for them...'

And that include Hisoka, isn't it? He was just another victim for you....

Tsuzuki's feeling was divided between hatred and compassionate as Muraki opened up to her. Something that had not happened before...

'Muraki... what happened to you during your childhood? When you tried to kill me... you spoke something about your mother...' Muraki gasped in surprised at this show of concern but quickly brushed it off as he released Tsuzuki. '...I was created by her. To her... I was her most precious doll among her collections....!! These silver eyes and hair... it was unnatural for anyone to have, but she didn't care. I was after all, her most precious possession. Though, never as a mother she was to me...'

'...Created?!! Then, am I....?!!' Muraki ruffled her hair, cheerily as he picked up the porridge bowl he'd left. 'Please.... don't think about it. I don't want to see your hurt face again!! I did it once already... I don't want to do it twice...!!'

'You spoke just like Tatsumi usually did....'

Muraki laughed. 'I probably do... and in some ways, perhaps I do have a lot in common with him...*smiled*' Tsuzuki snorted in mock contempt as Muraki suddenly wore a sad face.

'I've always despised myself of this strangeness of my own self. If not because of people like Oriya and Ukyou, I probably had killed myself already. But when I learned about you, finally met you in Nagasaki for the first time... knowing that at some point that we are the same, I felt that there is another reason for me to live... other than taking my revenge on that dead half-brother of mine who took everything I had from me...!!'

'Huh!! Don't flatter yourself...'

Muraki smiled at her. 'Ah well, think what you liked. To tell the truth... it was a long time since I was this sincere to anyone. Ne, would you like to have some? At least, it will help you calm down. I swear I did not put anything in it other than rice, eggs and chicken meat...!!', he said as he held out a spoonful towards Tsuzuki.

Tsuzuki eyed him carefully before letting him feed her. She swallowed the spoonful of porridge as she immediately felt warmth spreading all over her body. 'It's... good. Thanks...', she said as Muraki smiled again. 'So... why did you come?'

'To ask for your help...', he said as he changed the topic, seeing Tsuzuki's disbelief. '..aah, I was restless anyway so, I come to see you. Can I stay with you tonight for just a moment..?' Tsuzuki sighed as she ate another spoonful of the porridge. 'Not like I had a choice...as long as you don't do anything perverted to me!! So, what do you want my help for anyway...?'

'One of Ukyou's long-distance friend was missing and found dead later. Her corpse was slashed in the face horribly. She called and asked me to find out what happened to her friend...'

'Surely, it's not just one of your doings...?'

'It's not...!! That time when it happened, I was walking around to get you back to me!! You were with me... and that was a solid proof!! I had no reasons to do anything like that!! I've had all the researches I need and I don't have to kill anyone for no reason..!!'

'Haai... I don't know...', she said as she finished the bowl and set it aside. 'I'm sleepy...', she yawned as Muraki motioned her to lie on his lap. She looked up towards him and placed her hand on his face.

'Honestly... You shouldn't have any reason to despise yourself! You were beautiful... not many people have such charming face...'

Muraki grinned as he placed the hand towards herself and held it. 'You were beautiful too. Your eyes were the ones that charms me most. Perhaps it's time to forgive ourselves... ne?'

Tsuzuki smiled weakly as both of them fell into a fitful sleep, having each other as company...

'Here's some of the victims of a serial killings that was occurring recently. All of the girls are college students and as you see here... their faces were torn away beyond recognition. It was found later that all of the victims were from the same college...', lecture the chief with Tatsumi helping along with him. Tsuzuki gasped as Muraki's words come to mind...

'One of Ukyou's long-distance friend was missing and found dead later. Her corpse was slashed in the face horribly...'

It was exactly like he said... I can't believe it that he was telling the truth...

Hisoka glanced towards her as he saw her distraught face. 'Tsuzuki...? Daijoubu desu ka...', he said as Tsuzuki shook her head. 'No... I just feel bad...', she said as Tatsumi continued the briefing. 'The police at the district was still searching for the murderer but we fear that this may lead to more killings occurring in the vicinity. And knowing that there is at least one potential suspect, we must be very wary...'

'No..!! Muraki's not the culprit this time!!', blurted Tsuzuki spontaneously as all attention turned towards her...

'Tsuzuki...?', gasped Tatsumi in surprise...

[TBC]

az: Well... thanks for the support till now... And sorry for anyone who favors TsuiXHis pairing. I don't like it since I'm not one who likes lolita loving ppl... hehehe!! MuXTsu or TatXTsu... in the end I will not decide which... I loved both!!! Hahahhahahah!! For Hisoka... I liked the HisXTsubaki. Pity she died... T_T. I don't want to put in any OC... but I hoped somebody would try this. Hisoka.... I preferred him to have a normal pairing. Tsuzuki...? Well, coz he's more of a girl than a man... ^=^

A/N: Had anyone realized that Muraki and Tatsumi had A LOT in common? For starters, both had blood type A and were born on the same month!! Both wore specs and ARE taller than Tsuzuki!! Both loves to bully Tsuzuki... hentai or not. And both... this please note... had their crazy side... (Remember all those times when he had those evil thoughts of slaughtering the two Gushoushins and all?) I suppose... this were some of the traits that couse Tsuzuki to be drawn to their personalities... no? document.write "

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