Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monster GX Fan Fiction ❯ Lovely Idiot ❯ Reach ( Chapter 1 )

He was acting weird. At first, it didn't seem as anything more than initial shock (or so said Ayukawa-sensei) but now it was really starting to bug him. It's true a lot of things happened to Duel Academia this year but, ever since he transfered he always seemed friendly, never refusing to help to anyone and always smiling. But the Johan now... was different. It wasn't like he was rude, it wasn't like he wasn't kind, but something has changed in him. His aura felt different. Judai thought that he probably was the only one who noticed. Maybe, he was the only one around here who knew the true Johan. Or maybe he was the one being weird. It's not like he hadn't gone through some serious trouble his brain had not quite managed to assimilate yet. But he was able to overcome it, and it was thanks to the support of his friends, and Johan too. Johan was... no, is his friend. Although somehow in Judai's mind he always stood apart from the others. For Judai, Johan was the first person who understood him completely without the need to know anything about him. He didn't ask Judai anything personal and yet he always seemed to know exactly what was on the mind of the Osiris Red student. But this Johan now, he was really acting like someone else! He still smiled, he still helped anyone in trouble, he attended classes (as far as Judai had noticed, since he didn't attend classes all that much), he ate together with everyone, but there was something missing. Judai noticed the other boy acted that way when he was around him. What worried him is that maybe Johan lost a part of himself when he stayed behind in the Different World. That world was Yuber's fault but, Yuber was Judai's. Johan knew about that so maybe he actually hated him now...

That kind of thoughts swirled around in the Osiris Red student's mind, Judai Yuki - a 17 years old boy with a seemingly neverending stamina and passion for duels. He had spent a good few weeks on pondering over the question 'Does he hate me or does he not?' and while one would think said question could be solved with just asking, Judai Yuki had not considered that. The reason of that being - he never really considered anything for a long time. It was his nature to rush into whatever problem was in his way and hope Lady Luck was on his side. But those were usually problems regarding school or duels. And his problem right now was not an object but a person. A very precious friend who had always been able to read Judai like an open book. Judai was afraid that his fears might be confirmed if he asked Johan - the other boy might really hate him. So if he asked, he could get hurt. But if he didn't, he'd just keep hanging in-between...

'Man, this is really starting to annoy me!', he stood up from the cliff he had been sitting on for the last two hours, his usual passionate self returning. 'I really really really don't care about this anymore! I just have to know if he still considers me a friend or not, and I'm not gonna sit around for any longer than that!' And with that said (shouted actually) he stomped off to Johan's room. It was in the Blue dorm so he scared quite a few people with his seriousness (one of which Asuka, who was passed by in the middle of her greeting). When he was finally there and after a few knocks on his door, which were responded with nothing but silence, his mood became even worse. Apparently Johan was not in his room. And just when Judai finally mustered up the courage to ask him! Lady Luck had definitely given up on him. It would be best if he gave up too, for today at least, he thought. Tomorrow, he might try again. Yes, he surely will... tomorrow.

With a heavy heart, he walked the way to his dorm room, hoping to lock himself in, take out his deck and stare for a long time at his cards, undisturbed by anyone. For some reason, it always calmed him down. He could talk to Hane Kuribo, too, since it was such a good partner and a wonderful listener. That was of course if Hane Kuribo had not gone to play with Ruby somewhere. If that was the case Judai would just sit and stare - at his cards, at the ceiling - which had about 78 cracks, he didn't quite remember but he could always count them again. He had done it a few times by now. Or he could consider creating an imaginary friend to share his misery with. And for a moment, as he opened the door, he thought he had miraculously succeeded at that - for there was a lone figure in the room. However after a second his imaginary friend took the shape of a very real friend and admittedly the last person Judai needed to see right now. Because Judai's passionate spirit had gone away again, and in it's place was a slightly scared one. Disregarding the ever-so-annoying question in Judai's mind, he stepped a bit closer to the figure. A 17 years old vigorous boy with green hair and sparkling emerald eyes, that's what image one who had met Johan Andersen would call forth. Said boy was now sitting on a chair near the window, his back turned to the door Judai was standing on and his figure illuminated by the setting sun. It only took him a second to feel the presence of the other boy in the room, however, he did not turn around to face him. 'I need to tell you something', that's all that left his mouth as he patiently waited for the other boy to come closer.

- I... need to tell you something as well - Judai was almost a hundred percent sure now that Johan indeed hated him. Why else would he want to talk to him after practically ignoring him for the past few weeks? But even so, he had to ask the question that had been stuck in his mind, he had to take it off his shoulders or else he would sink down and drown in his misery. So after taking a deep breath he finally let the words out.

- Do you hate me? - he had imagined he'd shout them out to him, hear an instant painful confirmation and run out of his room and away from this person who only awakened contrary feelings in his heart but instead, he just had to stay there as silence fell upon the two. Johan had now turned around to look at Judai's face. His wide eyes and slighly open mouth clearly showed that he wasn't expecting a question like this. After a moment though, his expression returned to normal and his lips curved in a small smile. The same kind smile he always gave Judai whenever the Osiris Red boy was in pain or in trouble, the smile that showed he would be happy to share them all.

- Well, it's not very surprising you think that way... Judai, I never hated you. I just had a few things to think about and, I just thought that if I don't see you-

- What's that? Aren't friends supposed to not keep secrets from each other? If you have problems and never tell me about it, how can I help you? I want to... - he smiled, the type of smile Johan knew the boy gives especially when he doesn't want to make anyone worry about him - I want to help you, if you're in pain. You've helped me so much already and, I just always mess up. It's my fault you were stuck in the Different World, I... because of Yuber...

- Judai, I wanted to help back then. I never asked you to tell me anything about your past and I'm not going to start. Whatever has happened it doesn't matter. Don't worry about it. It's just that... I wanted to help you, always.

- But if you expect me to share you have to share too! I want to know what's bothering you. If we're friends, then you'll let me know...

- I can't - he shook his head as to say the other boy wouldn't understand - If I tell you... we might not be friends anymore. No, If I tell you, you'll probably be the one to hate me.

- Huh? No way! - `He said we're friends! He doesn't hate me!' Judai could almost picture himself as a puppy happily wagging its tail. But the thought of Johan hiding his feelings from him irritated him all the same. - If you really think we're friends, you shouldn't be worried over that. I can't hate you, no matter what.

Johan gazed at him. And kept on gazing. And then some more. That made Judai feel uneasy somehow, especially in the area around his stomach. Almost like the time he ate some bad shrimp and was feeling sick for two days. Of course, that didn't stop him from eating shrimp. That aside, it seemed Johan was finally done staring at him, because he shifted slighly and opened his mouth to talk. 'Like final words before execution', Judai thought. He couldn't really imagine anything too serious or scary, now that he knew they were still friends, he was sure there was nothing that could stand it their way and break them apart.

- I... don't want us to be only friends, Judai - `Here. It's done. I said it. Now it's either all over or by a miracle Judai actually accepts it...' The confession he's been worried about the past few weeks was finally voiced out loud. Johan had at first thought that, if he was away from his friend for a while, this weird feeling would disappear. However, it turned out it was a very persistent one. It wouldn't leave him even in his sleep, and after fighting quite unsuccessfully with it for the past few weeks, he thought it was best to just admit them and tell Judai. And more importantly, it seemed that Judai was suffering because of the sudden distancy of his friend. While looking at the boy's confused expression at that moment, Johan convinced himself for the hundredth time that he was some kind of a vicious monster. To just selfishly isolate Judai from himself without caring for his feelngs... He really was the worst!

And while he was busy overreacting his guilt he didn't notice the hands that reached out to him and pushed him backwards, and with such force Johan would have never thought Judai posseses. When he was finally able to pull himself together he looked up. He had somehow expected the push, but what he didn't expect was the expression on Judai's face. The pained look on the young boy's face, the clenched fists and a single teardrop was the answer to Johan's confession. '...He really hates me, huh...'

- You...! Stop screwing around, you idiot! What do you mean exactly 'More than friends'? I was so serious and you just mocked me... Dammit, I really hate you! - and with that he was out the door, running to whatever his feet would carry him. Just away from this room and this person who he once thought to be kind.

'What...' Johan's mind was still trying to process the happening. After a few minutes he had half-way given up when it struck him. 'He said I was mocking him... Could it be...' And a few moments later he was sure of what exactly Judai had thought. And he was even more sure that he, Johan Andersen, was the biggest idiot in this Academia. Because for having fallen in love with a fellow duelist and confessing to him, he never once took into account the fact that his precious person was indeed quite often, a simpleton. What was more, he was a simpleton who only cared about dueling. And his friends of course but at that moment, that was beside the point. Judai Yuki was known as a great duelist with a miracle draw, a friendly person, a food-lover, laziness for anything school-related and also, he did not seem to like girls. In fact he so easily brushed off any thought of them, not to mention hints from some Obelisk Blue girls (who Johan still kept a wary eye on, just in case) that the emerald-eyed boy had thought that maybe, just maybe, Judai was not into girls and he actually had a chance. It had never once occured to him that the boy did not respond to any of the girls because he was ignorant of their hints and even anything remotely related to 'the birds and the bees'.

 

****

 

When I turned around, I always knew that your smile would be there

But before I knew it, that reality has become a gentle memory

 

When I close my eyes, your smiling face is still there

Always, you gave me more strength than anyone else

BLACK STONE

 

All of a sudden, we would do something wild and stupid

It was casual and impulsive

It's become an irreplaceable treasure

The reality of those days

 

When I close my eyes, your smiling face is still there

Always, you heal me when I am hurt

 

I smile even when I'm lonely

Because by my side, you're...

You're there

 

I could never hate you for just being lonely...

 

When I close my eyes, your smiling face is still there

Because I believe that some day we'll meet again

 

Because we promised