Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Yugioh! Spring Broke ❯ When Catholic School Boys Attack! ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I HATE DISCLAIMERS!!! Ahem, I mean I hate owning Yugioh! yeah, that's what I mean.

An: Okay, just want ya'll to know that the voting polls are open. And yours count (yeah, I'm talking to you!!)!! You can vote for anyone who is single! (so no Ryou, Joey or Seto!!) so that leaves: Marik, Malik, Yugi, Yami, Bakura and (involuntary shudder) Tristan. . .

Bakura: If this is anything like your other story, we all should get life insurance.

Gw: Oh Bakura! You are such a cautious cat! None of your lives are in that much danger.

Bakura: --;;

Gw: by the way, from the votes so far Bakura has a fair lead!

Yami/Malik: Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

Malik: *whispers to Yami* the first one to serve Bakura's head on plate gets dibs on Tea.

Yami: *nods in agreement*

o^====^^^====^o

The Next Day

Everyone met at Yugi's house, except for Isis, Malik and Marik. Three cars are parked in front of the game shop for the 13 of them to travel in. . . .

Tea: *wearing shorts, pink T-shirt and has her luggage* So how are we all going to get there?

Yugi: Well, there are 13 of us so we'll use three separate cars, Joey's, Tristan's and Kaiba's. (an: yeah, I know these guys are like 15 and 16, but just let it slip okay?!)

Serenity: I'll ride with Seto.

Joey: uh, Serenity, don't ya think you should ride with me?

Serenity:*haughty voice* I can take care of myself Joey!

Joey: . . . .sure.

Mai: I might as well ride with you Serenity, you know, some one to talk to.

Joey: Mai! *whispers to her* Are you sure you don't wanna ride with me???

Mai: yes, Joey. I'm sure.

Joey: *pouts* I'll be in the car.

Yugi: I'll go with you Joey!

Ryou: Me too. *to Yugi* It'll be great! We'll sing songs, tell embarrassing stories, and *awkward sigh* maybe, just maybe, we'll make our dreams come true.

Yugi: Oo;; or I could ride with Kaiba.

Ryou: *in a scary voice* get in the car.

Yugi: Oo?

Just then Isis followed by Malik and Marik appear.

Isis: hi everybody! Sorry I'm late I had to pick up Marik.

Tea: Hey Isis, your just in time to choose which car you wanna ride in!

Isis: oh! *whispers to her* uh, which one is Ryou riding in?

Tea: ^_^ *points to Joey's car*

Yami: Hey, where is Marik?

*Everyone suddenly looks around for him*

Isis: Oh, he's right there.

*Everyone gets a good look at the stranger who Isis apparently thought was Marik*

Tea: OH MY GOD!!

Bakura: That's not Marik, that some-some--

Yami: CATHOLIC SCHOOL BOY!!!

(an: prepare for some freaky descriptions)

Yeah, Marik didn't really look like Marik anymore. First of all, all of the jewelry that he usually wore wasn't there, and he was wearing. . . A dress shirt, actual NON-LEATHER pants, and DRESS SHOES?!?! Oh yeah, his hair. It wasn't sticking every which way. . .it was combed. And flat. And basically he looked like a square. And by know everyone was really freaked.

Everyone: *really freaked* OO. . .

Marik: If anyone laughs, I'll have their head disconnected from their body by tomorrow. *gets into the first car he sees (Joey's car)*

Tea: oooooooooooookay. . . .I'll think I'll ride in Tristan's car.

Yami/Bakura/Malik: *all of a sudden perk up* Me too!!

Tea: Oo. . .

Seto: and since all the cars are loaded and we're all settled in, I suggest this Hill-Billy band wagon takes its first stop at the beach.

o^====^^^====^o

Tristan's car: no one cares.

Tea: Does anyone want to sit in the front?

Bakura: Yami does!

Yami: *speechless*

Tea: Okay, *gets in car*

*Bakura and Malik get in on either side of her*

Tea: Wow, this is comfy!

Malik: yes. . .comfy. *scoots closer to her*

o^====^^^====^o

Catholic Boys of the freakish Nature

Isis: I'll sit in the front and you and Yugi can sit in the back with Marik.

Ryou: *whines* but Isis. . .Marik is scary.

Isis: *grin* don't worry Ryou, he won't bite. Not when I'm around that is.

Ryou: . . .

Joey: *when everyone is in the car* Now it's time to get going!!

Yugi: *sitting in the middle* psst. Ryou.

Ryou: what?

Yugi: wanna switch?

Ryou: No!!

Yugi: Oh come on! He wouldn't hurt you!

Ryou: No!

Yugi: *whimpers*

Marik: *just wanting to freak Yugi out, flashes a devious smile*

Yugi: -_-; you know, your not really that scary when you have a dress shoes and pants on.

Marik: -_-;;. . .

o^====^^^====^o

Girl Talk

Serenity: I'll sit in the back with Mai, Seto.

Seto: Oo. . .uh don't you want to sit in the front with me?

Serenity: *rolls eyes* men.

Seto: . . .*in thought* I just realized that I'm going to by myself with a two chatty girls for atleast an hour. .

Mai: Oh my gosh! I know I think Brad Pitt is sooooooooooo hot!

Serenity: And don't get me started on Leonardo DiCaprio!

Seto: *in thought* Oy.

o^====^^^====^o

Whadaya get when you have three homicidal maniacs in a car?

*long silence in Tristan's car*

Bakura: uh, Tea. Want to hear a joke?

Tea: you? Tell a joke?

Bakura: *blushes* yeah.

Tea: ^^; okay!

Bakura: Whatdaya when you cross and elephant with an albino person?

Malik: *innocently* a moron who tells stupid jokes?

Bakura: shutup! *To Tea* Elephino! Get it? Hell-if-I-know, Elephino?

Tea: *laughs* Bakura! You could be a stand up comedian!!

Bakura: *blushes* Thanks.

Malik: *becoming jealous* I've got a joke too!

Tea: *quirky smile* you too? Well let's hear it.

Malik: Uh, did you hear about the Australian who wanted to get a boomerang?

Tea: *giggles* no.

Malik: He tried to throw away his old one but it kept one coming back!

Tea: *laughs until tears come out of her eyes* (an: hey, I'd be laughing too if Malik and Bakura were telling corny jokes!) That's the funniest thing I ever heard! You could be stand up comedian too, Malik!

Malik: *blushes* thanks.

Yami: *joining in on the fun!* Didja hear that A&P is buying Stop and Go? Yeah, there going to call it stop and pee!

Tea: *gasping for breath!* You all are hilarious!!

Yami: *satisfied grin*

Malik: *death glare to Bakura* What do you call two moronic yamis who are desperate for love!?

Yami: *pissed off* What do you a teenager who never had a girlfriend and never will!?!

Bakura: *also pissed* What do you call a fungus with spikey multicolored-hair!

Tristan: What do you get when you cross a skunk with a lizard?

Yami/Bakura/Malik: . . . . .

Tristan: What? I thought we were telling jokes!

(an: either a lunk or a skizard)

o^====^^^====^o

When Nuns attack!

Ryou: *talking about slugs (an: -_______-;;;)* Slugs are related to the snail, but with the shell represented by an internal plate overlying their respiratory cavity. Oh, Didja know that the Great Gray slug can be up to 11 inches long?!

Yugi: *desperate* Uh Marik, How was Catholic School? *realizes what he just said* oh fuck..

Marik: *filled with murderous rage* A hell you can never imagine.

Joey: Not really, *drools* Catholic School Girls. . .

Isis: *smacks him* Keep your eyes on the road!

Joey: *whimpers*

Marik: Why the hell would anyone want to send their children there?? *grimaces* I swear I'll get that fricken' nun!! (an: my gosh he's evil!!) Not only did she change my perfect hairstyle, she dressed me like some sort of Demon Child!!!!!

Yugi: *giggles*

Marik: *turns to him* YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY, DON'T YOU YUGI?!

Yugi: *shrinks down* n-no.

Marik: *evil grin* just remember what I said about the first person who laughed.

Yugi: (((Oo)))

o^====^^^====^o

It's okay Kaiba

Mai: So who do you think is the hottest guy?

Seto: *confident grin*

Serenity: I dunno, there alot of cute guys here.

Seto: *face fault*

Serenity: Yami, Bakura, Ryou, and I think my brother's handsome. . .

Seto: *in thought* What about me?!

Serenity: Malik, Marik, Yugi. . .

Seto: --'

Serenity: Am I forgetting someone?

Seto: *in thought* YES!

Mai: Oh yeah, Tristan!

Serenity: yeah!

Seto: ._.

o^====^^^====^o

Sleep on a maniac, suuuure that's safe

In Tristan's car there had been a long silence, and in that silence one could of easily fallen asleep. Which was exactly what Tea did. And who did she happen to lean upon to fall asleep? Bakura!

Tea: *rest her head on Bakura's shoulder*

Bakura: *blushes with a grin*

Malik: *whispering* you bastard!!

Bakura: *whispering* I guess it's obvious who she likes! *puts arm around her*

Malik: *getting really pissed off* Come on! I thought we were friends!

Bakura: go fuck a horse!

Malik: *death glare* *in thought* URG!! I'll get that Bakura if it's the last thing I do! Then Tea will be mine! MWAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

Tristan: *grin* hey guys we're here!!

Yami: finally! If I spent one more second with Bakura and Malik I pull out some of my perfect hair.

Malik: *glare to Bakura* why don't you wake her up Bakura?

Bakura: *grin* I actually think she's fine where she is!

Malik: *mouths* I swear I'll kill you!

Bakura: *mouths back* go fuck a horse!

o^====^^^====^o

Yugi: This is so unfair, someone is always trying to kill me!

Gw: It's your fault for being so darn killable!

Yugi: Wha--but--your not making any sense!

Gw: I know! ^_^