Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Delicate Petals ❯ Chapter 3 ( Chapter 3 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

-Delicate Petals-

Has anyone noticed that Hiei plays a big part in this fic? ^_^ I think he adds humor, 'specially when he's talkin' to Kurama.

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School was back in business after the small vacation we had and I was sitting in class, bored beyond boredom. The teacher was writing notes on the board and I wasn't paying attention. I sighed. I was starting to feel myself slipping away, like into depression or somethin'. I was writing the notes in my notebook, but my mind was on a certain someone. Maybe Hiei was right. I did need to tell someone. Maybe I could tell him.

"Psst!" I heard it next to me. I looked over and saw Ryu wave to me. I gave him a half-smile and looked dejectedly at the board. After class was over, Ryu was walking with me to our next class, Science. "What's the matter with you, Suuichi?" He seemed like he was concerned enough. I shrugged.

"I guess I'm just tired." He stared at me and I could tell he didn't believe me. No one believed me when I lied. It was no fair. Hiei could lie and people would think it was the truth. Why couldn't someone believe me for once in my life?

'They know you like a book, thats why.' I felt a link form between me and Hiei. Ryu saw that I was spaced so he just left me to my thoughts, of that I was glad. 'And you're a bad liar.'

'What should I do?'

'Tell somone, stupid.' I almost smiled at his insult. I wasn't that stupid to just smile, as if it appeared out of no where.

'Can I tell you?' I could almost hear him groan and insult me, but he didn't.

'Yeah.'

'Meet me in my room after I get out of school.' The link closed and I came back to the living world. I realized it was already the middle of class. I sighed. Ryu looked over at me from his seat next to me. We were partners, after all.

"Can I come over today? My mother won't care." I bit my lip thoughtfully. Hiei was gonna show up. I sighed again.

"Yeah, we really need to get this project done."

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When I got home with Ryu, Hiei had already let himself in.

"You know, Suuichi, Botan was looking for you. She said she'll see you a little later." I looked over at him. He was sitting on my bed, as usual, drawing in his notebook with his pencil, also as usual.

"Really? Well, that doesn't matter right now. We've got a Science project to do." Hiei looked up at me and raised an eyebrow. Ryu was staring at him, then at me. I could tell he was confused.

"Suuichi, you really should start marking things on your calender." He said, getting up. He pulled out a red marker and pointed to Saturday. "Get together at Genkai's temple." He circled it.

"I don't use my calender."

"It's no wonder you forget things." He sat back down on my bed then started pretending we weren't there. I turned to Ryu.

"Pretend he isn't there. Just don't sit next to him. I don't even remember when his last Rabies shot was." Hiei looked back at me.

"Two months ago last Thursday." I stared at him and shook my head.

"Let's just get to work."

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I looked over when someone knocked at my door. I groaned inwardly. It was her. Botan.

"Suuichi, Hiei." She smiled slightly. "I have bad news, you guys." That caught Hiei's attention.

"What is it?" I asked. Ryu was staring at her. I didn't like that. Nope. She bit her lip then walked over to the bed and sat down next to Hiei.

"Keiko's grandmother died two hours ago. Koenma.." She said and I understood. "So, needless to say, her funeral will be on Wednesday." We made eye contact then I looked away. My gaze moved to the calender. I didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry.. It must've been hard." Even words of sympathy seemed to come out bitter to her. She then got up and walked over to me. She stared into my eyes defiantly.

"Spill." I glared at her.

"You don't need to know more than I told you, Botan." I snapped. Hiei even had sort of a look of surprise.

"Listen, I'm really concerned about you. You haven't been yourself towards me or anyone else." I could read her concern in her amethyst eyes. "You're my friend and I'm worried." My vision started to go blurry on me but I bit it all back. I wasn't going to cry again. There was no way in hell.

"I'll be fine. I just need time to return to the way I was." I didn't make eye contact with anyone. Hiei got up and grabbed me by my shoulders. I stared at him.

"What the hell is with you?" I shook my head and stubbornly didn't say a word. I blocked off my thoughts so that he couldn't read them.

"Hiei, let him go." The soft words caused me to almost cry. Whenever she used that tone of voice, I knew she was upset. I felt Hiei's grip weaken around my shoulders. Then he completely let go and mumbled something about 'moron' and 'stupid'. I looked up at Botan and she was staring at me. She leaned down to me and wrapped her arms around me. "Suuichi, no matter what happens, I'll always be there for you." She pulled away slightly and kissed my cheek. "Just make sure you take care of yourself." I nodded. That was the only thing I could do. She walked over to the door and turned the knob. "Good-bye Hiei."

"Hn." Was his only reply. He was too busy being pissed off at me.

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Ryu had left an hour ago and I spilled myself out to Hiei when we were alone. He stared at me, his mouth hanging open slightly. Then he shook his head and closed his mouth. He seemed to be thinking something over.

"Koenma is a bastard. I wouldn't trust him if my life depended on it." I would trust him, but I thought about Hiei's words.

"Well.. I think that's going a little too far." When I told him my problem, I felt a little better. Atleast it helped with the weight of the problem.

"You know I don't like anyone." He flipped to a different page of the notebook and started doodling again. I sighed. Homework doesn't do itself. I opened my history book and started on it. "You're boring."

"How many times have you said that to me so far?" I asked, amused. He looked over at me and blinked.

"I wasn't counting." His answer was blunt, matter-of-fact. I gave a short laugh.

"I was making a point. You say that to me a lot." He snorted and just ignored me for the next few minutes. In that time, I got my history homework halfway done. Okaasan came up and told us that dinner was ready. I guess she knew Hiei was here. He was always here. He didn't have any other place to be.

"We'll be down in a minute." I told her and she nodded. Hiei smirked.

"You could always say I'm here for the food." He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Freeloader." He glared at me when I walked past him. Conversation at dinner was very boring. Hiei just ate and so did I. Okaasan started telling me about her trip to her doctor's. "I'm glad you'll get better soon. How do you feel?" She smiled at me.

"I feel fine, only my stomach hurts sometimes. I've only thrown up a few times." She had a questioning look on her face. "It was an odd flu."

"You can say that again." I mumbled. Hiei caught it and raised an eyebrow. I shot him a look and frowned.

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I sighed. My life was slowly draining from me. School was such a boring place to be. I was wasting my time trying to understand stuff that teachers only learn so that they can torture us by giving us the long version of it and making us do it at home. I opened my locker and pulled a few notes from girls out and tossed them in the nearest trash bin. I got my books and slammed the locker shut. Ryu came over to me and smiled.

"How is your morning?" He knew I was agitated. That wasn't hard to figure out.

"More notes from females I don't know." I answered. "Then I feel my life slowly slip away from me in school." He chuckled. He gazed at me with his blue eyes. He had short black hair and almost handsome features. He got notes too, but not as many as I did. Besides, he had a girlfriend. Mai was a pretty girl. She was sweet and caring and the perfect match for Ryu. They were a good couple.

"Hello Suuichi, hey Ryu." Mai ran up to us. I smiled at her slightly then continued on my way.

"I'll meet you in class, Ryu." I mumbled to him when I was a little way away. My emerald eyes never left the floor as I walked to homeroom. My day was going to be filled with boredom. I sat down in my seat and idly stared out the window.

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Hiei sat on my bed and watched me pace again. He threw a pillow at me. I turned around and looked at him.

"Stop it." He said in irritation. "If you can't help it, then I'll tie you to the tree outside." I crossed my arms.

"It is my fault I'm like this, I know. But.." I trailed off. He rolled his eyes.

"Of course it's your fault. You're the one who fell in love with her." He put his head in his hand and his eyes followed me as I started pacing again.

"I just don't know what to do." He snorted and I looked at him, crossing my arms.

"Get over it." I rolled my eyes. He sometimes doesn't pay any attention to me. Okaasan called me downstairs and I walked down. I was hoping and praying that it wasn't who I thought it was. Instead, it was all of them. Hiei came down and stared at them. "Well, if this isn't the best surprise in the world." I could tell he was being sarcastic.

"What are you all doing here?" I asked, blinking. Yuusuke walked forward and grinned.

"We decided to pay you a visit. C'mon, aren't ya gonna invite us upstairs?" I watched them walk to the stairs, my mouth hanging open slightly. Koenma and Botan were there as well. My day has gotten worse.

"I.. uhm.. seriously, why are you all here?" I asked when I followed them upstairs. They found my room quite easily.

"You haven't been yourself, so we thought you'd like some company." Keiko said with a smile. I stared at all of them. Kuwabara walked over to me and stared at me.

"You're right. He doesn't look good at all." I shot them all a glare and walked back over to my desk. I sat down in my chair and ignored their eyes.

"I'm fine." Be it may, I wasn't. Seeing Koenma and Botan had lessened any chance of my recovering from this. Hiei sat back down on my bed and resumed his position. I looked over at him then put my head in my hands. Where did I go wrong? What did I do to deserve this? I fell in love with her. I didn't tell her. And now she's in the arms of another man. How can I deal with this?

"You don't look fine." Yuusuke sat down on the floor somewhere near me and stared up at me. They all made themselves comfortable on my floor and stayed silent, watching me. I felt my eyes water. Why couldn't they leave me alone and let me recover? It was too late now.

'They're morons.' Hiei's voice replied in my head. A small link was there.

'I can't do this.' Even my voice inside my head cracked. Why did I deserve this? Pain and suffering wasn't helping me. I felt my weakness. Look at how weak I've become.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I felt Keiko's hand on my shoulder. I nodded. No one believed me. I might as well tell them that I'm not fine and that I'll never ever recover.

"You're not fine, are you, Kurama?" Botan. I wanted to scream shut up at everyone. I wanted them to leave me alone. I wanted all of this to be a dream. But I knew that it wasn't. It was real and it would always be real. My heart would always belong to her. I could never love another..

"Dammit!" I cursed. I felt their sorrow. I felt their pity and remorse. They couldn't do anything for me. It was all my fault I was like this. I was so goddamn weak.

'Suuichi, maybe you need to think this over more. Go over possible solutions.' Youko's voice said in my head. I decided that I could scream at myself. I totally ignored his comment. I thought this through. Day and night. 'Try again. You only got through the negative parts.' I was being selfish. I wanted my life to be wonderful. I wasn't thinking straight. Something was affecting me.

"I think it would be best if none of you visited me anymore." I looked up at them. The pain and torture was clear in my eyes, I knew.

"Why?" Was the question sweeping through all of them.

"Because I'm not myself. J-Just go.. It isn't right that I'm taking up your precious time." My gaze somehow was met by an amethyst one.

"Think about this for a minute. Isn't this decision a little--" I cut her off with a glare.

"I've been thinking about it." I stopped then continued. "It's all I could think about. No, this decision is for the best of everyone. Go live your lives without me." I stood up and walked out. They knew the way. Somehow, I regretted it. Yet, also, I feel as though it was the best decision to make. I walked to my favorite spot. I didn't have a life anymore, it seemed. It was only a dark and dirty road of pain and evil. Tears fell from my eyes as I sat there, on the ledge. I was imagining myself walking down that path. Flames crackled around me. The woods were consumed by a dark black fire.

"You know what you said." His dark words echoed in my mind.

"Yes."

"Does that include me?" I shook my head. He walked over and stood behind me. He was the only one who could possibly understand what I was going through. No, he never felt this pain inside before, but he knows.

"They don't realize what they did." He looked down over the cliff and watched the waves of the ocean crash against the rocks below.

"I thought you could handle it. I didn't even know they were going to do that." The gentle wind surrounded us as we stared out over the horizon.

"I don't know what to do anymore. I should tell my okaasan who I am, then go back to Makai." My life there could probably relieve me of this pain.

"It wouldn't help. You would be running away." His soft, dark, cold voice rang out. I knew he was right.

"Thats my only option. They're better off without me." He didn't answer.

"Are they?" He finally asked. My hair blew back and stuck to my tearstained cheeks. I didn't know.

"I don't know." His crimson gaze never landed on me. I silently thanked him. I don't know what I would've done without him. He's good company. My gaze fell upon a bird, soaring in the air. All alone. Just like me. I saw myself flying. High above the clouds. I never knew such freedom before. I closed my eyes and sighed. I was at a hard decision in my life. Return to my real self and suffer or stay like this and suffer. "Are you going back to my house with me?"

"Yes, of course. I'm there for the food, remember?" That made me smile. I realized I didn't need anyone. I could be like Hiei. Cold, rude, a freeloader.

"Freeloader." I got up and wiped all traces of everything from my face. This was an adventure I knew I would never forget.

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End of chapter 3. Thank you for the reviews. It'll get better. Promise. Maybe in a few more chapters.