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| "A Romp In The Park" Reviews/Comments [ 75 ] | | Pages (5): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 5 › » ] | Reviewed By: Inu/Kag please On: June 09, 2006 15:27 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
wow your amazing at this i mean wow please update faster I want some Inu/Kag
| Title: Excellent
Reviewed By: Cool Kid On: June 05, 2006 01:37 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wonderful crossover and lemon as well, But as I was reading chapter 14 One thing stood and that was how OOC Inuyasha was. Inuyasha is really possive and seeing watch Kagome make love to Ranma is pushing it. But you do have a wonderful story.
| Reviewed By: Nelson Bannaba On: May 26, 2006 00:10 CDT
Comment/Review:
Wow, what fun that was! I'm completely satisfied with this so far, unexpectedly entertaining and creative (not that I'd think you wouldn't be entertaining or creative, but I was worried I wouldn't 'get' this story due to the unfamiliar characters, but they grew on me). You'll have to alert me to future updates. Lots of fun! Sexy!
| Reviewed By: Nelson Bannaba On: May 25, 2006 23:58 CDT
Comment/Review:
Oh, I've made it this far and things are VERY SEXY. You've managed to keep the heat going pretty steady through these chapters and I'm fanning myself now. I loved the lecherous armor bit - Kagome attacking him with a bit of NC sexiness. But the conversation between Akane and Inuyasha was my favorite - talk about true confessions! Something about that scene just melted me, especially when she sent that image back at him near the end. This is really making my night!
| Title: you can title your review? Fancy!
Reviewed By: Nelson Bannaba On: May 25, 2006 23:10 CDT
Comment/Review:
It's been pleasant thus far and this chapter is getting a little titillating. I have to admit, however, that I'm not really 'getting' half of it - only in a vague way at least - because I don't know Akane and Ramma. Off to read more.
| Reviewed By: inu hanyou nikkie On: May 20, 2006 09:42 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
That was bloody Brillant!!! snickers.. You are such the tease, Literary Goddess!! That was totally awesome!! Whoot!! Whoot!! Whoot!! Brillant!! Bravissimo!! Bravissimo!! Magnifico!!! You totally Rock!!!! It was so action packed and emotionally charged and then comedic relief in perfect doses!! I loved the way you took care of the Armor and a brillant touch in having Kagome conspire with Ranma about the armor. That was sooo evil! I loved it!! When Ranma thought he was going to be attacked after Kagome hauled him into a kiss was great. Then having Ranma see Inuyasha and Akane in conservation and him getting jealous was a great touch as well. I laughed when Ranma made the comment of Kagome being like Akane when she got angry but where Akane he enjoyed making angry Kagome scared him!! Awesome!! So Rumiko-ish!! And how Inuyasha came to himself and realized what was happening and his reactions after that!! So in character!! Poor Inuyasha.. he never that the luxury of being able to accept the demon Moon part of himself and accept it being natural. Perphaps in Kagome's time he can do this and be able to have more control while having more freedom. I liked how Akane held him and understood that he was hurting. I wonder what Akane gave Kagome... I laughed when Kagome brought Inuyasha over to Akane and said he is all yours then she rubbed his ears. Really cute!! And I fell out of chair laughing when Ranma just leisurely tossed Akane the Armor to wear. He is such a Hentai. The way you are building up to the lemons is a really, really masterful style!! I really am super happy with the way you had forged a friendship and family sense with the two sets of couples. It was a touching moment!! I also liked the end notes you added. Gives the reader a little something to think about. What a talented and wonderful writer you are!! And long live Ramen!! It is the mainstay of Rumiko's works!! Bows humbly to the masterful author!! Uses forklift to carry over a shipping crate of virtual Pocky and Ramen... They must be famished, especially the boys, after all that... eat eat eat!! And that backpack!! chuckles!! Great touches you always seem to know how to add and when!! I also giggled that while Inuyasha and Ranma were inhaling their Ramen they were also eyeing each other!! Got a sense of two little toddlers going "mine!" ...Wonders if they might have a Ramen eating contest.... Wonders who would win... sighs... Inuyasha would.. he has a bottomless pit for a stomach... Even the Demon Moon loves Ramen.... This is a truly awesome story!! Thank you ever sooooo much for writing it and for sharing this with us!!! You totally rock!! Please keep up the most awesome work and I can't wait for the next installment of the story!!
| Reviewed By: Okaasan-7 [MediaMiner Member] On: May 19, 2006 21:38 CDT
Comment/Review:
I guess I'm a bit prudish but foursomes are for jaded couples, not for first timers. The way you were leading us on, I didn't really enjoy the last couple of chapters but I'm really looking forward to the next. O-7
| Title: We need more!!
Reviewed By: doggieearlover [MediaMiner Member] On: May 16, 2006 13:19 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I have to say how much I love this fic. The characters are kept true to form, though I can't wait to see how they work through the temptations they have been assaulted with. And the armor with a mind of its own? What are they going to do? I'm not really sure what all of the fuss about you having a foursome is - so far each has only been with his/her own partner, even if they are being tested at the moment (how dare you stop there!!). So far you just have had the two couples in close proximaty to each other - does NOT a foursome make!! I eagerly look forward to you next chapter. I can't wait to see how you get them out of the evil cliffy you left us with.
| Reviewed By: Fenik On: May 16, 2006 01:10 CDT
Comment/Review:
Oh, this was too much fun! A nice treat to end my retinal-burning workday. Nifty way you figured out how to get out of the 'hole'! I salute you! Another banner day...the imps let me leave a review! Whoot!
| Reviewed By: inu hanyou nikkie On: May 15, 2006 13:03 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Oh merciful Saints and Kami... Literary Goddess, I had just found these three chapters and all I have to say is I'm speechless!! It is beyond words!! Delirously, happily, excitedly speechless. The story is progress masterfully and beautifully!! Whoot!! Whoot!!! Whoot!! Yeehah!! Kudos!! Magnifico!! Stupendious!! I Loved how you have the Armor speaking to Kagome due to the Jewels power. That was a great touch.. Adding in the unknown element!! I do want to give the Armor a smack across the head. It wants Ranma.. Pictures Ranma in Armor... makes weird noises... Poor Kagome, must be going through a huge helping of Possession Deja Vu. Yep, the girl has been possessed yet again. lol I love it!! I enjoyed the interaction between Kagome and Ramna and Kagome's reluctance to repeat what the Armor was telling her. That was an awesome touch and hiliraous too. I did get a little confused though.. Are they still in the afternoon setting? It is early, Mid or late afternoon? Early mid evening? I read the moon was shining down on Inuyasha and Akane. So is it now after dark? That was the only part where I got a little confused and it didn't make sense when I read it. And Inuyasha- going into 'season'... giggles that was a wonderfully and delicious touch!! Biologically possible for males to go into heat.. because when 'that' season hits it is all the males of any species can think of - the need to mate. the Demon Moon.. promptly sings out 'when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amoure...' I love the angst you gave Akane with the ending of the last chapter!! That was great touch. Wow.. and again I say WOW!! This is definitely turning into one of the best fics I have read. This is brillant and so heart pounding and so climatic building!! I eagerly await your next installments. Every chapter that comes out I simply love it!! Hands over a crate of multi flavours of virtual Pocky!! I am sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to see what will happen next. Poor everyone... Lust is truly a very, VERY powerful force to be reckoned with. And the Armor... oh my what will happen.. Please keep up the most excellent work!! And Goddess... you have me sold.. I love the respect and love that you hold for our favuorite characters, and whole hearted agree that you have a wonderful grasp of the characters.. that at this point.. whoever the couples are, if there is foursome or not.. I have happily set it aside and only want for the pleasure of reading and expericening your story!! You are such a delightful writer. Plus I laughed at the offer to turn Inuyasha human again with the hot water.. That was just a comedic moment. I pictured Inuyasha's expression. And with the ramen that was also a great touch... so typical Inuyasha. Thank you so much for writing this story and for sharing it with us!!! I wonder will you be maybe .. possibly.. thinking of writing more Inuyasha/Ranma crossovers.
| Reviewed By: Nokomarie the Snake On: May 15, 2006 11:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
Reading this with a WTF and slight sniggering as intended, good for you. I also note your correct placemnet of Nerima as a suburb of Tokyo, very well done.
| Reviewed By: PeachesMcGee On: May 15, 2006 04:06 CDT
Comment/Review:
Okay. So. I'm not a fan of foursomes. You might even say I/K is my OTP, and I get antsy when they get messed with, so normally I wouldn't have bothered reading past that point, because, quite frankly, if they were to get together I find it highly unlikely that they would ever hook up with other people. However, I liked your characterization alot up until that point, and while it was not totally IC (IMO) it was interesting and good (an amazing thing for most fics). So I read on, because I was interested in seeing how you managed a 'foursome'. (It should be noted that I feel a good foursome means EVERYBODY gets it on simultaneously, i.e. Kagome/Akane are doing stuff and same with I/R, and all combinations thereof, too). And normally I wouldn't comment but you seem quite concerned with characterization, so: please note that this is just my opinion, and that up until this point I have found your fic to be one of the exceptional pieces of Inuyasha lemon in the fandom. It had an interesting dynamic, the watching was damn hot, it built up very nicely. Overall, quality fic. And I will admit that my hatred of foursomes between certain people is pretty high, and may affect my opinion somewhat, but I have tried to be objective and: I really feel that you got so caught up in trying to make the foursome work that you disregarded the characters (even the characterization you had built up) and used some fairly cliche fandom devices to make it work. Like I said, just my opinion, but I have read foursomefic (I/K/S/M) that has really made me believe that it could happen. I honestly think that if you had to make perverted armor and 'demon moons' and other highly inconcievable plot devices to make the foursome work 'IC' then you probably should just acknowledge its not working and leave it for another fic. Because it was really jarring to me, so much so that I went from 'yeah, I could see that' to 'what the hell?' and slight snickering. While I can't say anything definitive about R/A, I/K would not jeapordize their newly sort of built up relationship by fucking other people. Watching, okay, but the act of physically touching and being intimate with another person, in particular a veritable stranger, would be a gross betrayal of the relationship they had built up so far. Inu has his issues, and he has barely looked at a girl that was not Kagome or Kikyo, and he has been hated and lambasted and he is a jerk on the outside (even if he is fluff inside), and so I highly doubt that some 'demon moon' is going to make him go off fucking other people, or even willing to jeapordise his relationship with Kagome, because she is pretty much the most important person in his life and hell yeah she gets jealous of Kikyo, so why not stranger girl. It is one thing to watch, and another thing entirely to touch and be intimate. And as for Kagome: she is remarkably aware of others feelings, and even with some crazy suit of armor on that is trying to molest Ranma, she is not just going to worry that fucking around with someone else is going to make Inuyasha jealous. She is going to be aware that it would hurt him deeply, because he trusts her and he at the very least cares alot about her, and her fucking someone else is going to make him feel very betrayed. Especially after they just finished breaking the bonds of their friendship and moving on to something else. It just jars - hey, we begin to show our love for each other - now, we throw it on the line for a quick fuck with a random stranger because we are drunk with lust and in a crazy plot situation. I imagine something similar with R/A. I think if you want to do a foursome then you should do it - but I also don't think this fic is the place to do it. You could have it in an AU, or still cannon before everyone gets together for comical effect, or after they are comfortable in their relationships and 'experimenting'. I just don't think that this fic was the place for it. At all. But I liked it a lot up until then.
| Reviewed By: twosen On: May 13, 2006 14:04 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm not exactly a great fan of lemons, but I must say you've got a great style of writing and you've managed to keep the characters in character, more or less (well done!). The only thing that squicks me ever so slightly is the thought that R/A or I/K would be sorta doing a monkey-see-monkey-do... and in public! I guess you could call it... character development or something? Heh. I guess I shouldn't be so logical when it comes to reading PWPs after all. Psst. Minor correction: R/A live in Nerima while I/K are based in Tokyo. Not so likely that they'd run across each other in a park... Sorry for being nitpicky! ^^;; Keep up the fic writing! ^__^
| Reviewed By: InuYashasLover unsignedin On: May 09, 2006 19:24 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I Love this love love love love love love love love love love!!!!!! but pleeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaase no four some they can watch each other but no mixing parteners they can even talk but no switching parteners!!!!!!
| Title: Hmmm...
Reviewed By: Kurai-kun On: May 09, 2006 14:46 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Well, that was a wonderfull turn of events if i say so myself. I have throughly enjoyed the story so far, and i would really like to see how you would manage to get the characters into a foursome (even if you have to send it to the foursome fans via e-mail). btw mine is starry_eyed_bandit_girl@yahoo.com Plz write a foursome chappie even if the other fans don't like it and send it to me, unless you post it here of course! and I agree with Inu Hanyou Niki you really do desrve a gigantic box of POCKY!!!! I myself just tried it yesterday and was surprised to find that it was kinda like chocolate covered pretzel stick only without the grains of salt of course. But, I love it now!!!! But, back to the story keep it up cuz i really want to see where the next chapter takes the group of overstimulated teenagers!!!! Sincerely, Kurai-kun
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