Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction / Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Crossover Fan Fiction ❯ Ginga GIRI GIRI! The Universe is in Danger! ❯ The Root of All Evil ( Chapter 11 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer: Anime ain't mine. But this fic is. Yeah. Amiko and TM exist in
real life.
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Ginga GIRI GIRI! The Universe is in Danger!
By SSJ Heero
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---- Recap ----

SSJ: Last time, on GINGA GIRI GIRI...

Amiko: Stuff happens! We enter the Planet!

TM: Met FF7 and FF9 people!

SSJ: And now, here we go! Filler time!

Amiko: DAMN! NO!

---- Chapter 11: The Root of All Evil ----

The scene opened in a small town. Houses lined the streets, filled with litter and trodden
over by cars. Amiko, SSJ, and TM appeared over the horizon and walked through the city
gates. SSJ's hair was thin and wiry, pointing up instead of falling down. TM was weary,
with the bag of bishie-balls slung over his shoulder. Amiko was straining to walk. TM's
eyes narrowed; he threw down his bag in exhaustion and yelled into the air, "DAMN IT! WHY,
OF ALL TIMES, MUST THE SHIPS RUN OUT OF FUEL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT?!"

Amiko groaned, "Damn it... What's with our bad luck...?"

The three wandered through the town. The streets soon became crowded as the three entered
the town square. Being nimble and silent, TM quickly snatched the wallets of those wearing
the richest suits. He pocketed the wallets and turned to the other two. "Let's go to a
motel or something," he suggested.

The other two nodded. They passed a sign, made from wood and hanging from a stake embedded
in the ground. It read, "Welcome to Stocks."

***

Hours passed. In the darkness of night, a car ran along the streets of Stocks. Darkness was
its cloak as it came to a stop in front of a large concrete building. On the walls,
carvings that resembled to word "Bank" was visible in a street lights. As silently as he
could, the driver opened the door of his car and stepped out.

He was silent as he stepped in front of the bank. From the pockets of his trench coat, he
pulled out a key. He quickly unlocked the door, and slid along the wall until he was under
a security camera. It automatically turned to his left, and he ran in the opposite
direction, and into the power box. With great swiftness, he flipped the switches for all
the security devices.

The red light on the camera stopped blinking. Whatever lights were left in the building
shut off, and he was plunged into total darkness. A different light turned on, though, and
the man was visible in the light of a flashlight he held in his hand. His dark brown eyes
seemed to be black in the lack of light. His hair was covered with a tight cap, hidden from
sight.

He pulled another thing from his pocket. A black box. With time on his side, he quickly
worked the box. He taped it by the door of the vault, layered metal over concrete over more
metal.

Just a few minutes later, a loud crack filled the air. Not a minute later, the man ran out,
bags slung over his shoulder. He ran through a glass window, shattering it instantly. In a
flash, he trampled over the grass lawn, and threw the bag into his car. He pushed it aside,
and slammed his door shut.

Five minutes after, the bank was swarming with police. However, he was already gone without
a trace.

***

The next morning came, and the three were at the table of an outdoor restaurant. A
newspaper was in the center of the table, shaded by an awning. SSJ and Amiko sat and read
the headlines, while TM sat quietly and thought to himself. SSJ looks up, and then met eyes
with Amiko. They then glance towards TM.

"A bank was robbed, huh?" said SSJ.

"So, what?" Amiko coldly said back. They had better problems to worry about, after all.

TM narrowed his eyes and snatched the newspaper. He spoke, "I need a place to store our
cash, and that was the place I was planning to deposit."

"Oh... Well, what are we going to do?"

There was a silence. A group of people walked by, laughing and yelling over the noise of
cars. TM just said, "Well, let's go to that bank..."

The three pushed back their chairs and walked away from the restaurant. Not much longer,
the three reached the crowded bank, swarming with police. The streets were lined with black
and white cars, with red and blue sirens sitting atop the roofs. The area was surrounded
with the yellow police tape, and a large team of police surveyed the bank for evidence.

The three approached the bank, noticing the open window and skid marks from tires in an
adjacent street. They reached the edge of the tape and stood silently, looking at the
damage.

Some distance away, one investigator was examining papers of the little evidence when he
noticed the three, looking straight into the bank. He turned and walked towards them. He
asked, "May I help you kids?"

The three turned and looked at the new person. His long brown hair flew about in the wind,
with his blue eyes staring straight at the three. His muscular body was covered with an
open brown coat, under which there was a blue shirt, tucked into light brown slacks. TM
answered, "Well, we needed to make a deposit..."

"Well, the bank is not going to be helping. We hardly have any evidence of from robbery
except for the broken window and the skid marks in the street."

SSJ said, "I guess it must be frustrating."

"It is, kid."

The investigator rubbed his aching forehead as a voice called him back. He turned and
yelled back to the voice, and then spoked to the three, "Look, if you three need to find
another bank, there is one nearby. It's down the street in that direction-" He pointed to
the south. He then continued, "-and a left turn when you're at the second street down.
Well, bye."

With that the investigator turned and walked away, and the three looked towards the
direction he pointed. They then walked together to the other bank in silence.

***

An hour or two later, the three returned to their motel room. SSJ sat in a soft cushioned
chair while Amiko fell into her bed. TM stood by the window. He stared out at the city,
whose lights were beginning to shine as the sun set. His eyes were stiff as he spoke,
"Well... Looks like we're here. Should we leave tomorrow? Or should we stay?"

SSJ sighed, and stared at the ceiling. He began "Well... There is no reason to stay-"

Amiko interrupted him then, "Hey TM, how much money did you deposit?"

TM turned to her and thought about it. He then replied, "Well, I deposited about twenty
thousand dollars..."

SSJ's eyes are narrowed as he sarcastically said, "So, people carry a lot of money in their
pockets now, huh?"

"Heh. Yeah."

TM then dropped on his bed, and grabbed the TV remote. He pressed a button, and a
television opposite the bed turned on. A commercial about some kind of lotion was
displaying. The screen turned black, and a program showed- the news. They heard the
reporter speak, "Last night, a bank robbery occurred in the First Bank of Stocks."

The three's attention were caught, and SSJ looked up at the reader/viewer as he muttered to
himself, "My... How convenient."

The news reporter continued, "At the scene, the only thing found was chess piece, a knight,
and a note in the center of the vault. Police report that only the time and day are written
on the note: Midnight, Two days from now. We shall cover more as the story develops."

Another reporter appeared on screen with other clearly important news, "Looking for a
clean, healthy, alternative food-"

The TV turned black, and TM put down the remote on the counter between his bed and Amiko's.
He turned to SSJ and asked, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"...No. I'm not. And I don't think I want to know..."

***

Ten hours later, SSJ, TM, and Amiko sat atop the roof of a large building, across the
street from the other bank. They sat as low as possible as a cold wind grabbed the back of
their necks. The three shivered, and SSJ spoke in a low, annoyed tone, "Okay, so here we
are, out in the freezing cold, for WHAT reason, TM?!"

TM answered, "Well, we might be able to stop another robbery."

Amiko snapped at him, "And, HOW do you know if that report is accurate-"

Just then a car stopped in front of the dark bank. The three slightly leaned over the wall
in front of them as they saw a figure move out from the car. It was too dark for them to
see any features of the man's face, yet they heard him cough. The three stood, and silently
ran to the corner of the roof. They slid down a fire ladder, and landed in an alley. They
witnessed the figure from afar as he unlocked the door. That struck TM. "How can he..."

Amiko wondered, "Did he pick the lock?"

Within two minutes, the three watched the man dash inside and passed a wall. They lost
sight, and SSJ got an idea. He spoke, "Hey, Yuffie."

In a flash of red, Yuffie appeared beside SSJ, sleepy and groggy. She rubbed her eyes as
she leaned on SSJ. She just sleepily said, "Yeah?"

"Can you hit a tire of that car from here?"

Yuffie stopped rubbing her eyes, and looked in the direction SSJ pointed. She drowsily
grinned. "Yeah. Easy."

With great silence, she chucked several shurikens at the tires of the car. A loud pop was
heard, and the four hid behind a brick wall. SSJ patted Yuffie and said, "Thanks. Return."

Yuffie smiled as she turned red again and disappeared inside SSJ's pockets. The three
waited as they heard loud footsteps. A moment of silence passed, until a soft curse was
audible. Amiko leaned over the corner, and gazed in the direction of the car.

As time passed, the man eventually reemerged, sacks of money slung over his shoulders. He
turned and ran away, abandoning the car, heading away from the three. TM emerged from the
corner and yelled at the top of his lungs, "STOP!"

The figure stopped, dropping the bags of money. He turned around, and glared at TM. He
spoke in a low voice, "Well, so it's you who have ruined my plan..."

TM was silent as the thief stepped toward him. The thief spoked, almost to himself, "Well,
whoever you are, you seem to be pretty smart, figuring out I was gonna strike here..."

"Heh," TM muttered.

***

Just six hours before, SSJ, Amiko, and TM were sitting around a circular table in their
motel room. With a map of Stocks, the three discussed about where the robber will strike
next. Amiko said, "Now, how do we even know *if* the robber will strike next?!"

However, TM was too busy discussing with SSJ, and Amiko fumed. She grabbed TM by the neck
and started chocking him. She yelled, "HEY! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?! HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT
THE NOTE WAS TRUE?! HOW CAN YOU TRUST A NEWS REPORT TO GIVE YOU ALL THE FACTS?!"

TM was silent. Finally, he answered, "I'm just guessing."

Amiko sighed, and couldn't help but want to grip around TM's neck. She restrained herself,
and sunk in a chair. She looked at the floor as she spoke with an annoyed voice, "This is a
stupid plan..."

TM then turned to SSJ, ignoring Amiko. "Well? Where do you think he might strike again?"

SSJ thought for a while. Then he recalled the chess piece. He pointed to the location of
the robbed bank, and moved several places in the movement of a knight. His finger landed
upon the bank they were just at. SSJ and TM realized it at once. SSJ said, "Ack... That
figured."

"Yeah." The two thought a bit more, and TM got an idea. He said, "Hey! We could stop the
guy!"

Amiko turned to TM and said, "You really think we can?!"

"Well, our bishoujo and bishounen can."

Amiko sighed, "Fine... This will absolutely not work, though."

***

Back at the present, TM and the thief faced off, as SSJ and Amiko hid behind a brick wall
in the distance. TM stood, unarmed and unprotected, while the thief dropped the bags of
money and relaxed. He spoke, eyes closed, as a wind blew around the two. "You know my game,
huh?" he said. "Well then, here. Catch me tomorrow if you can."

The thief tossed TM a small piece of wood. TM caught the piece and looked at it. It was a
polished, thick piece. A Chinese symbol was written on it. TM looked up, and saw that the
man was gone and a sewer cover lifted up and to the side. SSJ and Amiko emerged from their
corner while TM dashed to the hole. However, the thief was nowhere to be seen. TM cursed,
and pushed the sewer cover over the hole. He then turned to SSJ and Amiko. "Damn! He was
right there!"

Amiko said, "Well, what would you have done?"

"Summon Tifa... Or Garnet..."

"...And that was your plan?"

"It was a good plan!"

SSJ interrupted before they could argue, then, "Hand me that thing he threw to you."

TM and Amiko quieted down, as TM tossed the piece to SSJ. SSJ's eyes widened as he looked
at it. He recognized the symbol and told, "It's a Chinese chess piece..."

Amiko asked, "You know what it is?"

"Yeah. I used to play it some years ago. This is... A canon..."

"A canon?" TM inquired.

"Yeah. It moves like a rook, but it captures by hopping over another piece within its
movement lines."

TM then walked to the bag. He picked up the bags of money and tossed it through the window.
The window shattered, and the alarm rang loudly through the street. TM turned to the two
and yelled, "Come on! We gotta go!"

The three quickly ran away to their apartment, hiding from the spotlights of the police
cars.

***

The three were bent over the map in their motel room again. SSJ and TM looked at the map.
The first two robbed banks were crossed off, and Amiko struggled to think. The room was
musty and stuffy as the three thought. Eventually, Amiko opened a window and a light breeze
entered. She broke the silence, "How did the piece move again?"

SSJ placed the Chinese chess piece on the second bank. He explained, "The canon moves like
a rook. It can travel left, right, forward, or backwards as far as it likes." The other two
nodded in apprehension. "However, it captures by hopping over another piece."

TM couldn't quite get that. He never did encounter it. "What does that mean?" he asked.

SSJ sighed, and demonstrated, "It means, in order to capture a piece, there has to be
another piece between it and that piece. It captures differently than it moves."

Amiko snapped her fingers together. "Oh... That's it."

The three quickly foundnd four banks that were in the position described. Other banks lay
between the four banks and the second attempted robbery. The three cursed. There were four
possibilities. "This is harder than I thought," muttered TM.

"Four possible banks?!" Amiko thought aloud.

SSJ swore, "Damn..."

"Which one is right?!" TM wondered.

***

The police swarmed the bank, with yellow tape surrounding the area. Police checked all the
evidence, including the abandoned car, with the shurikens still embedded in the wheel. The
inspector stood by the car, with a cop standing right next to him. The cop spoke, "It seems
like we got help, eh, Jarrett?"

Jarrett was silent, and leaned over to inspect the shurikens. They went clear through the
rubber wheels, and tore into the metal behind it. He replied, "Indeed..." He then got to
his feet and looked around at the half-wits trying to find any evidence at all. He frowned
that they could find no other. He then wondered, "But who could have been helping us?"

Several hours later, Jarrett pulled into the driveway of his apartment complex. He stepped
from his car, and noticed a notice attached to his mailbox, which was just under an awning.
He walked over to it and picked up the note. He read it and was surprised with the
information. "Another robbery...?! Is this real?!"

***

SSJ and company were waiting in the alley across the street from a bank. It was dark, save
for the dim lights of the street. SSJ, Amiko, and TM sat on the ground, wearing thick
cloaks to drive away the cold. The three were silent, but finally, a car appeared. And
again, the thief stepped out. He thought to himself, 'Heh... They would never figure this
out...'

The thief strided through the concrete walkway, and stepped up to the glass and metal door
of the bank: the Federal Union Bank. He pulled out his key, and unlocked the door. He
walked inside, ignoring the three peeking around the corner where they hid. TM spoke,
"Okay, let's go."

"Good thing that detective found our note," SSJ muttered.

Amiko added, "Yeah. We actually have help..."

"Come on out, Tifa," TM commanded. And Tifa appeared in a flash of light, TM paying close
attention to certain aspects of hers.

"Let's go, Catherine," said SSJ. Catherine appeared by SSJ, smiling, and Yuffie angrily
materialized between the two. Yuffie quietly argued, "Now, WHY did you choose to summon
THIS weak knife thrower?"

"'Cause you're tired."

"WHAT?! I'm not... The least... Bit... Tired..." Yuffie then fell forward. SSJ caught her
and returned her to her ball, sighed, then continued.

Amiko then finally summoned Zidane. The rest of her bishounen followed suit. Amiko was
silent. She then muttered, "This is why I shouldn't be so damn sexy."

TM and SSJ facefaulted, and quickly got up as the bishounen began to bicker amongst
themselves. Amiko quickly quieted them, and the group reached the door of the bank. TM
called into the bank, "COME OUT! AT ONCE!"

There was a loud crash in the bank, and money spilled from the open vault door. No one
moved. The room became silent. SSJ muttered to Catherine, "Can you hit the light switch
from here?"

Catherine squinted and saw a small room opposite of them. The electricity box lay inside.
"Yeah," she replied.

Then, Catherine pulled her knives from her belt, and chucked one at the electricity box.
With great accuracy, it hit the light switch lightly, and flipped it up. Light suddenly
floodded the bank, catching the group and the thief off guard for a moment. The group
quickly ran and surround the vault and looked inside. They were taken aback. The thief was
nowhere to be seen. "WHAT THE FUCK?!" SSJ yelled.

"Where the Hell did he go?!" Amiko yelled.

TM swore, "Damn it!"

The three ran into the vault, searching for another exit. The bishounen and bishoujo
followed, searching for any escape route at all. They foundnd none and were left baffled by
the man's disappearance.

The group stood in the far end of the vault, and before they could react, a smaller vault
door opened, and the thief leapt out of it. He quickly ran out of the vault, and shut the
door and turned to lock before the group could run out.

He then laughed, but the three and their bishounen and bishoujo were unable to hear through
the thick walls. They banged and clawed at the walls, but failed to shove it open. They all
cursed, but still, no one heard their screams. The thief just said, "Heh. Stay in there for
a while."

The thief strided out of the bank and to his car. As he opened the door and sat in the
driver's seat, he thought to himself, "Oh well... At least I'll have the cops off my tail
for a while."

The thief pulled out his keys, and inserted one into the ignition. He turned the key, and
prepared to ride away. "Well, off to home."

The thief waited, with his keys turned. The car sputtered, but refused to start. He turned
it once more, yet it still refused to start. He cursed, wondering what was wrong with his
car. He stepped out of his car and swore, "Fuck... Another piece of evidence for them..."

He kicked up the hood of the car and looked inside. He searched for the engine to inspect
it, but was unable to... ...for there was no engine. It was completely torn out, and he
heard a loud creaking sound. He turned, and saw the engine, hanging from a tree. It swung
and twisted on its rope, and the thief yelled indignantly, "The Hell?!"

A voice called behind from behind him, stupefying him, "So, looks like we finally caught
you."

The thief turned around to see the detective, David Jarrett, behind him, standing with
hands in his pockets. "You are under arrest for grand theft and arson as well," Jarrett
simply said.

The thief stepped back. He swore and turned to run, but only meet the simultaneous flashing
of several car headlights. He turned back to Jarrett, who stood, smiling. The thief was
then handcuffed and was shoved toward a police car. Then, a hole appeared in the ground.
SSJ, Amiko, and TM, as well as their bishounen and bishoujo, emerged from the hole.
Everyone was taken aback by their sudden entrance. Jarrett began, "How the Hell-"

Thief finished from the car, "-Did you three appear?!"

SSJ answered, "Plot hole. No need to explain." He turned to Jarrett, then, and said, "Okay,
there's your guy..."

TM interrupted, "DO WE GET ANY BOUNTY OR SOMETHING?!"

Jarrett smileed and laughed. "Well, here's ten grand," he said as he handed over a wad of
cash. "That's enough for your work?" he asked.

TM sighed at the small amount, for he had stolen much more before, but still pocketed the
wad of cash. Jarrett then asked, "Oh, by the by, how did you know he would come here?"

SSJ pulled out the Chinese Chess piece and explained, "Well, he left a knight the first
place he thieved when we came. When we met him at his second bank, he left us this Chinese
Chess piece: the canon." Jarrett nodded as SSJ continued, "I know how it moved and
captured, but there was four banks situated in position."

TM added, "It seemed nearly impossible then, because they were far away, and it would be
hard to stop him if we split."

SSJ finally finished, "So then we just rolled a dice, and this one came up."

Jarrett, the thief, and various other policemen facefaulted. The thief yelled, "YOU USED
LUCK TO FOIL MY BRILLIANT PUZZLE?!"

TM grinned and said, "Yeah. And it looks like luck was on our side."

After being silent for a long time, Amiko finally spoke, "I hate to admit it, but they
succeeded. Damn luck."

"AND I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT, TOO! IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU MEDDLING KIDS!" The thief
was then carried away in the car, and the three turned to walk away from the crowd. But it
was then that one of the policemen recognized the faces of the three.

"HEY!" he yelled. "THEY'RE WANTED ON TERRA! THEY'RE BOUNTY IS SEVERAL BILLION!"

The three stopped in their tracks. "Eep," they said at once.

The cops, including Jarrett, dashed over to stop the three, but the various bishounen and
bishoujo fend them off. Quickly, the bishounen and bishoujo disappeared into the three's
pockets, and the three ran into a black plot hole. It closed, leaving Jarrett and his crew
cursing.

And during the fray, the thief managed to escape. Jarrett cursed a louder one this time,
sighing at his luck.

***

The next day, SSJ, Amiko, and TM wandered through the forests. Various trees and thickets
surrounded the three, but they followed a dirt path and eventually found a small hot spring
manor. Amiko squealed in joy, as TM and SSJ sighed. She said, "Yes! Hot springs! We haven't
been to one in a long time!"

"We were in one last chapter," said SSJ as he tried to have them go past.

Amiko pouted and replied, "Yeah, but it was not shown!"

SSJ sighed, "Whatever."

A few minutes later, SSJ, TM, and all of Amiko's bishounen were soaking in the wide, male
hot springs. A thin bamboo wall separated them from the women's hot spring, where Amiko and
SSJ's and TM's bishoujo basked. "Damn," SSJ sighed with relief. "This is quite
refreshing..."

"Yeah," TM added. "Especially after all that thieving and such."

SSJ sighed, then yelled across the bamboo wall, "This has been a fun adventure, huh,
Amiko-chan?"

"I know," Amiko's voice carried from the other side. "It hasn't been that bad after all..."

And then, the bishounen of Amiko began to bicker yet again. SSJ, Amiko, and TM sighed.

Squall yelled, "Shut up, you spikey-assed wimp!"

Cloud insulted back, "I wouldn't be talking, you haven't even gone through puberty, yet!"

Kamui just said bitterly, "Will you two shut the Hell up?! You make even a trip to the hot
springs bitter."

Then, all the bishounen became involved, before Amiko forced them to return to their
bishie balls. They turned red, and disappeared into Amiko's clothes, folded beside the hot
springs.

***

And later, still, SSJ, Amiko, and TM were journeying through the forests again. They pushed
down various plants as they trod through. They walked around various trees as they made
their way onto a dirt path once more. They looked around, and saw a small noodle shop.
Someone stepped from the shop, and the three immediately recognized him.

SSJ groaned as TM began, "It's Saotome..."

Amiko then yelled with delight, "RANMA!"

Ranma, (un)fortunately for him, heard the calls, and looked behind him to see the three. He
was right in thinking he did not recognize them and asked, "Do I know you three?"

Without reply, Amiko just ran after Ranma, leaving SSJ and TM in the dust. Ranma jumped
back and ran away from Amiko. He yelled, "GREAT! FANGIRLS! Why do I have to be so sexy?!"

SSJ and TM facefaulted. SSJ was silent as he picked himself off the ground. He looked at
Amiko, who was already a mile ahead, chasing after Ranma. TM and SSJ quickly ran after her.

---- To Be Continued ---

[Scenes from the next episode are shown in the background, and chibi
characters are shown in the foreground...but you can't see because this is
text. XD)

SSJ: Hey! Here we are! Filler's over!

Amiko: YES! THANK GOD!

TM: And now, it looks like we have another bishounen.

SSJ: Wackiness abound!

Amiko: And some CRAZY plot twist or something.

TM: NEXT! On GINGA GIRI GIRI!

All three: "Jusenkyou! Oh no!"

Gene: (from out of nowhere) You better get ready!