Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Ebony and Ivory ❯ "Poor Monster..." ( Chapter 26 )

A/N: Gomennasai!!! But realistically, there's no way Yuki could have hidden the piano from Akito indefinitely, and there's no way that Akito would be fine with Yuki being friends with Kyo! And it's so hard to make Kyo get things that Yuki had to go to extremes, and still has to, because what he's doing doesn't make sense to begin with, so I'm so sorry!!! *sniffle. I promise that this story will not end in complete tragedy, or I would have put that in the genre. So please keep reading, even if you hate me for being terribly cruel…

 

A/N 2: Warning: some swearing in this chapter other than Kyo's usual language, but only for a second.

 

 

CHAPTER 26: “Poor Monster…”

 

The fights over the next week were worse than ever. Kyo realized that they were just like they had been at the beginning, except somehow worse. They wouldn't even go near each other now. The look of disdain in Yuki's eyes was more than Kyo could bear, and he began to each lunch by himself. Haru came and sat with him, though, which Yuki, strangely, did not seem to mind.

 

Then Kazuma, after learning from Haru what was happening, invited Kyo to spend a weekend with him. Kyo happily agreed. During the weekend, Kyo's temper cooled. He remembered how close he and Yuki had been before. It seemed like it had been a very long time, but Kyo knew it hadn't been. It wasn't too late to change things around. Yes, they had had some bad fights. Yes, Yuki had hurt him. Hurt him badly. But it wasn't the end of the world. And it didn't have to mean the end of their friendship.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Yuki was reserved over the weekend. He seemed much calmer, which was a relief to everyone. But no one dared approach him to ask about Kyo. Yuki knew all of this. He felt a strange sense of triumph. He had done it. He had driven Kyo away. He had been strong, and now Kyo was angry at him. Throwing the letter away had been just the thing. The letter now lay in Yuki's box of gardening tools, still unopened. Kyo had forgotten about it apparently, and Yuki wanted to keep it. He would read it later, someday when it was safe. Maybe.

 

In the back of his mind, Yuki was frightened at how completely he had cut himself off from his feelings. But he didn't acknowledge the fear. All he thought was that he was doing his job, and doing it well. Kyo would be safe, now. They would never be friends again—Yuki had passed the point of no return—but at least Kyo would be safe. Yuki didn't allow himself to flinch at the word “never”. It had to be this way. All that mattered was that Kyo wouldn't have to go through that.

 

Kyo seemed subdued when he came home. He acknowledged Yuki with a look that held neither friendliness nor hatred, but perhaps a little hurt and confusion. But he didn't speak to Yuki. He talked with Honda-san and Shigure. It seemed that the weekend away had done him good. Yuki was glad. He really didn't like to see Kyo hurt. He hoped that Kyo and Haru would become friends, or that someone would somehow intervene. Kyo didn't have to hurt. He only needed to think Yuki didn't want to be his friend. And yes, in order to convince him of that, Yuki would have to hurt him, but if the pain could be at all nullified by others, Yuki was glad.

 

Yuki stayed in his room while Kyo was downstairs with the others. He was exhausted. Tohru had been reminding him lately that he needed to eat, but he never had an appetite these days. He didn't even feel like playing the piano anymore. For the first several weeks he had yearned to play. He had needed something to help him release his feelings. But now he had no feelings. It was strange. Like being dead. Am I alive?

 

Yuki went downstairs and slipped out the front door without being noticed. He had no coat, and he was barefoot. He went out and lay down in the snow. It was cold against his skin—so cold it burned. I can feel pain. I'm alive. I'm just not human. After several minutes, Yuki began to shake, but he still didn't want to go inside.

 

“Yuki? Are you out here?” Kyo's voice.

 

“What do you want, stupid cat?” Yuki murmured. He heard footsteps, then saw Kyo standing over him.

 

“What the hell are you doing?” Kyo asked.

 

Yuki closed his eyes. “I don't need to explain myself to you.”

 

Yuki heard Kyo sigh, and then footsteps receded. “Tohru asked me to tell you that dinner's ready. If you don't want me to tell her that you're trying to catch your death in the snow, you'd better get inside.”

 

Yuki didn't want Honda-san to worry. He sat up, and rose to his feet. “I'm trying to catch my life,” he said softly.

 

Kyo turned around, and Yuki realized that he had heard. Kyo looked at him with a concerned expression. The kind of expression one would give a friend. Yuki slumped. He still doesn't get it? What do I have to do to get through to him?

 

“Yuki, come on. You look blue.”

 

Yuki sighed deeply, not even finding the strength to argue. “Okay.” He went inside, then up to his room to change out of his wet clothes. It occurred to him to feel guilty about the extra laundry, but the thought never reached its completion. Yuki went to dinner and ate a tiny portion, completely ignoring the others. Then he went up to his room, and prayed that Kyo wouldn't follow him.

 

Kyo avoided Yuki for several days after that. Whenever he was around, Yuki would come up with some reason to be annoyed with him. He was beginning to feel desperate. There were only a few days left before Kyo was to go to Akito's. And he still didn't believe that Yuki meant to end the friendship. Kyo was clearly still angry about the letter, but he apparently valued the relationship too highly to cast it aside because of that. Yuki would have to come out and say it. And he would have to be the one to start the conversation.

 

Everything fell into place for it, on the thirtieth day. Honda-san had spent the night at Hanajima's house—Yuki had a feeling that Hanajima was probably worried about her and wanted to give her a break—and was going to school with her. Therefore, Yuki and Kyo had the walk to themselves. And, to Yuki's immense relief, it was Kyo that started it off.

 

“Ne, Yuki…”

 

“I don't want to talk.”

 

“I know. I just want to say that whenever you're feeling better, let me know. Until then, I'll leave you alone. Okay?”

 

Yuki said nothing for a moment, calling on all of his strength. Then he turned to Kyo, eyes full of the disdain that he knew hurt Kyo so much. “Do you still think you can `fix' this?”

 

Kyo seemed to shy away from the coldness in his voice. “I'm not saying now,” he said desperately. “Be mad at me. That's fine. I'm just saying someday…”

 

“It's not going to happen!”

 

Kyo looked confused, and suddenly very, very scared. “Yuki… of course it will… we'll make amends… right? That's what friends do…”

 

I'm sorry. “Who and who are friends?” Yuki asked, keeping a cold annoyance in his voice.

 

Kyo looked pale. “Yuki-nii…”

 

“Don't call me that! We're not brothers.”

 

Kyo stood still, the color drained from his face. He seemed to be considering for the first time the possibility that the friendship really was permanently ended. “No… Yuki… you said…”

 

“Would you come on? We're going to be late for school.”

 

Then Kyo got mad. “You can't just do this!” he shouted. “I didn't even do anything! Nothing that deserved this! You can't act like you want to be someone's friend and then turn around and change your mind! That's just what you told me not to do!”

 

“You weren't being honest when you acted like that.”

 

“Then you honestly hate me that much?” His voice was sarcastic.

 

Say it! “Yes.”

 

Kyo stopped. “I don't believe you,” he said in a queer voice, as though he were reading it off of something. Yuki looked back at him. Kyo met his eyes. “If you mean that… if you mean that, look me in the eyes and say it.”

 

Yuki looked at him, straight in the eyes. I'm sorry. “I hate you.” I hate you, Akito. I hate you. I hate you. He turned away from Kyo, who stood still in utter shock, as though he had been stabbed and the pain had not yet hit. When it did, Yuki was already several steps ahead with his back turned. He heard Kyo's voice behind him.

 

“Well you know what? I hate you too! Do you hear me?! I hate you too, you damn rat!! You son of a bitch! I hate you too! And… and don't think I'll ever be your friend after this, even if you want to! It's over! I don't care! I hate you!”

 

Yuki closed his eyes. So be it. “Would you stop making a scene, you stupid cat?”

 

Then he heard footsteps running behind him. He turned. Kyo was running in the opposite direction, running away. Yuki didn't try to stop him, and merely walked the rest of the way to school.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Kyo couldn't stop running. All he could think was that he had to break something. He needed to tear something apart. And then he saw it. The piano in the park, the one Yuki had played on the first day he had acted like a friend to Kyo. Kyo wanted to tear it apart, but couldn't bring himself to do it. So instead he took the piano bench and threw it against one of the pillars of the gazebo. The piano bench broke into several pieces, and the pillar bent into two pieces. The roof sagged dangerously. Kyo didn't care. He knocked out another one of the pillars, which caused a section of the roof to fall in. Then he heard a voice.

 

“What the hell do you think you're doing?”

 

Kyo turned. It was a policeman. He stood still, no longer caring, and let the man catch him.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Kazuma picked up the phone on the second ring, somewhat surprised. He didn't receive phone calls very often. “Moshi-moshi.”

 

There was silence for a moment. “Hi… Shishou?” Kyo's voice sounded like a dog expecting to be whipped.

 

“Kyo? What happened? Are you all right?”

 

Another pause. “I… I… kind of… um…”

 

“Kyo, what happened?”

 

He could hear Kyo swallow over the phone. “Don't…” His voice broke. “Don't… be… be mad, okay? I… kind of… I'm at the police station.”

 

Kazuma leaned against the wall. “You've been arrested?”

 

“I…”

 

Kazuma sighed. “All right. I'm coming to get you. You can explain when I arrive. And the explanation had better be good. Goodbye.” He hung up the phone and made his way to the station, alternating between worry and anger. What had Kyo done?

 

The police met him when he arrived. “I'm Sohma Kyo's father. What happened?”

 

“There was a piano in a gazebo in the park, and he destroyed a bench and knocked out two pillars.”

 

Kazuma felt his jaw drop. “May I speak with him?”

 

They walked to the back. Kyo sat in a jail cell and looked up when he saw Kazuma, and then away. Kazuma sighed and turned to the jailor. “I would like to sit with him. Is that all right?” The man nodded and opened the cell door, allowing Kazuma to enter. Kyo continued to stare at his shoes as Kazuma sat beside him on the wooden bench. “Kyo, I thought we'd been over this. You cannot damage public property when you're upset about something.”

 

“Shut up,” Kyo said.

 

Kazuma was shocked. Kyo had never been this blatantly disrespectful. “I beg your pardon?” he asked angrily

 

Then Kyo began to cry. “I beg yours,” he whispered. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It just hurts so bad…”

 

Kazuma's anger evaporated. “What does?”

 

“Yuki… he just said… he hates me…” He buried his face in his arms. “I just… went crazy. I'm sorry. Please… please don't hate me.”

 

“Kyo, I was upset, but I certainly don't hate you.” Kazuma drew Kyo into his arms, and let him cling. He was bewildered. Yuki had said he hated Kyo? There had been tension, certainly, but… “Are you sure he meant it?” Kazuma asked softly.

 

“Yuki always means what he says,” Kyo whispered, burying his face against Kazuma's shoulder. “And he looked me right in the eye and said it.” He gave another sob, as though reliving the memory. “And I didn't even do anything,” he whispered at last.

 

“Maybe I could talk with him.”

 

“Please don't,” Kyo said softly, at last letting go. “I just want it to end. I don't want him to say it again.” Tears came to his eyes once more. “Shishou, please let me move back in with you.”

 

“We'll see. Okay? I'll give it serious consideration. But for right now, we need to work things out with the police and take you home. I'll talk to them, and I think I can convince them not to put his on your record if the damages are paid.”

 

“I'll pay them,” Kyo whispered. “It'll just take me a while.”

 

“Then I'll take care of the initial payment, and you can pay me back when you're able. It will be all right. Stay here for a few minutes.”

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Kyo sat, and sighed. If only Yuki wasn't the type who weighed his actions so carefully. Then Kyo could attribute his behavior to a fit of rage, or something like that. But Yuki's every action was intentional. Even throwing away the letter like that had been calculated. Yuki had been trying to cut off the relationship for weeks. Kyo had just been too blind to see it. But why? The question burned in Kyo's mind. Why did Yuki hate him?

 

At last, Kazuma returned. “I told them you'd been badly hurt,” he said. “That's all. They didn't ask for details, but they dropped the charges. I paid the repairs. Don't worry about the money for now, Kyo. It's all right.”

 

“How much was it?”

 

“It doesn't matter. Let's just get you home, okay?”

 

“I don't want to go home.”

 

“Yuki isn't there right now, right? He's at school.”

 

Kyo sighed heavily. “Okay.”

 

When they arrived home, Shigure met them at the door. “Kyo-kun? Kazuma-dono? What happened?”

 

“Nothing you need to worry about,” Kazuma said. “Kyo and Yuki got into a fight. That's all you need to know.”

 

Shigure nodded. “Very well. Um… perhaps this isn't a good time, but… you've received a summons from Akito, Kyo… for this afternoon.”

 

Kyo stared at him blankly. Then he looked at Kazuma. “You know what I think is really funny?” he asked bitterly.

 

“What?”

 

“How people always think things can't get any worse.”

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Kyo sat in Akito's room. He didn't bother to kneel. At last, Akito turned around. “How are you?” he asked. “My poor little monster?”

 

Kyo said nothing. All that kept coming to his mind was how things used to be with Yuki. The memories tortured him. “You didn't call me here to ask how I am. What do you want?”

 

“Actually, I did call you here to ask how you are. I wanted to make sure you are enjoying your last few months on the outside.”

 

“Well I'm not, okay? So you can go to bed happy tonight.”

 

“I'm sorry to hear that. What happened?”

 

“None of your business.”

 

There was a pause. “Excuse me?” Akito asked, in a voice that was dangerously quiet.

 

“Yuki was acting before like he was my friend… or at least I think he was. Maybe… maybe I really did make it out to be more than it was. But I guess I did something… I don't know. But now…” Kyo's voice cracked. He buried his forehead in his hands.

 

“Now what?”

 

“He hates me,” Kyo whispered, willing himself not to cry again. “He doesn't want to be my friend at all. I don't get it. Why does he hate me again?”

 

“Poor monster,” Akito said, sitting near him. “Of course the rat hates you. You're the cat. He will always loathe you. You are nothing to him.”

 

“But… he said…”

 

“Perhaps he was trying to be kind, maybe for the sake of that Honda girl. I've heard that she wants you and him to get along better. He probably didn't think much of it. And he tolerated your company. Imagine how disgusted he was to realize that you actually considered him a friend… that you would dare to touch him.”

 

Don't touch me. Kyo covered his face. “But he's touched me.”

 

“Oh, well, one will force himself to touch a repulsive object at times, for a good cause. But for you to reciprocate the touch… honestly, you thought he would be okay with that?”

 

Now there were tears in Kyo's eyes. He couldn't help it. “So… it was all fake?”

 

“I'm afraid you've been deceived,” Akito replied sadly. “He never meant it to go into friendship. Merely to keep the peace in the home, I suppose. He probably also wanted to help Shigure, to keep the house from being smashed to pieces because of your typical monstrous behavior.”

 

Kyo pressed his lips together, and dragged a memory from the back of his mind. Yuki, on their way to Saito's. “He said I was one of his best friends. He didn't care that I was the cat.”

 

Akito sighed. “Does he feel that way now?”

 

Kyo slumped. “No.”

 

“Here's what I think happened,” Akito said. “He began to think of you as a normal person. I do not know how he could have been so blinded, but it must have been so. But then you probably did something, or perhaps he talked to someone, and he came to his senses, and realized that you really aren't worth his friendship.”

 

It made so much sense that it stung. “I…” He couldn't continue.

 

“Honestly. You killed your own mother. Do you think Yuki would ever want to be friends with someone like that? Yuki is very conscious of his image to the rest of the family. Imagine how much you would taint it.”

 

Kyo's eyes widened. Yuki had started this weirdness shortly after New Years. They had been talking at the party, and eventually Yuki had been called away. He hadn't returned. It might have been that he was engaged, but… could it have been that he was embarrassed? And that that embarrassment had grown to hatred because Kyo kept forcing the friendship?

 

“He was probably embarrassed to be around you. Really, Kyo. The rat, being friends with the cat? It's unheard of. I can't believe you would even dare.”

 

“Please stop,” Kyo whispered.

 

“Of course,” Akito replied. He smiled. “I have no intention of causing you further pain. I merely want to say that you should not feed on the insolent idea that the rat might want you as a friend. You disgust him. Your voice, your touch, even your presence.”

 

“Stop,” Kyo whispered again, desperately, squeezing back his tears.

 

“It's all right. You're dismissed. Enjoy your last three months.” Akito turned away, and Kyo staggered to his feet and out the door.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Yuki watched Kyo leave Akito's house from behind some bushes. Kyo's eyes were red, as was to be expected. His bracelet was intact. Yuki waited until Kyo was far out of earshot before emerging and breathing a sigh of relief. I did it. I was strong. He walked to the library, picked up a book he had on hold, and went home.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

Kyo walked in the door, hours after he had left Akito. It was now late. He had been wandering aimlessly. Tohru instantly knew that something was wrong. “Kyo-kun…”

 

Kyo looked down. He didn't want to yell at anyone. “I'm not eating tonight, Tohru. I'm sorry.” Then he went upstairs. He did not come down for the rest of the night. He heard Yuki downstairs, heard him sound almost cheerful. Kyo wished so badly that this was a dream from which he could wake up. He couldn't believe what Akito told him. He couldn't believe that Yuki disdained him because he was the cat. All the evidence pointed to it, but… but they had been so close. Yuki had said he cared about Kyo, and that Kyo was one of his best friends. He had played piano for Kyo, even written songs for him. They had fought, and played, and chatted together. What had gone wrong? Had it been New Years?

 

Kyo lay on the roof for hours. He cried at first, but stopped when he realized it was doing nothing to relieve his pain. It hurt too much to cry. Kyo refused to go in. Yes, it was cold, but inside was colder. Kyo wished he could hate Yuki again. He probably would, eventually. But he didn't really want to. He wanted this day to disappear, and he wanted to solve things. Even now, if Yuki suddenly came, apologized, and offered to spar with him, Kyo would leap at the chance. But it wasn't going to happen. No matter how much Kyo yearned to see Yuki climb the ladder, he knew it wasn't going to happen. Yuki hated him. It was over.

 

Maybe it was true, that Kyo didn't even deserve to be Yuki's friend. He had so many shortcomings… more than Yuki had ever had. Why had Kyo ever thought Yuki would want to be his friend, after spending enough time with him? Yuki was perfect, and Kyo was the cat. The disgusting monster.

 

It was after midnight when Tohru came up. Kyo prayed he wouldn't have to explain things to her, but braced himself for her questions. But she said nothing. She merely sat on the roof, a few feet away from him, in silence. Kyo waited. She still said nothing, and didn't even look at him like she expected him to start a conversation. She was just there. Kyo relaxed, and turned away. Somehow, it was comforting to have her here, just like it had been comforting to have Kazuma earlier. They were all he had left. But they were there. She was there.

 

After about an hour, Kyo happened to look over at Tohru. By now they were both lying down, looking at the stars, but Tohru was asleep. Kyo felt a twinge of guilt. He made to touch her shoulder to wake her, but ended up stroking her hair instead. Then he squeezed her shoulder. “Tohru?”

 

“Hmm?” She opened her eyes. “Oh… I'm sorry… I fell asleep…”

 

Kyo helped her sit up, and kept his hand on her shoulders for a moment before dropping it. “Today really sucked, okay?” he said at last. She nodded. “That damn Yuki…” He couldn't continue, and sighed. “Anyway, there's nothing you can do about it. Except what you did do, sitting with me. Thanks.” He straightened himself. “I'm going to bed now. You should too.”

 

“Okay, Kyo-kun.” She held his hand for a moment, and then climbed down the ladder, waiting to see Kyo climb into his room through his window.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>& gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

 

A/N 3: I told you I'd have hints of Kyoru. I really like that pairing. :-)