Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Chimaera ❯ Chapter 76 ( Chapter 76 )

Please see previous chapters for notes, disclaimers etc.

"Chimaera"

By ShenLong.

Chapter 76

Three more days had gone past without anything untoward happening and Trowa was finally beginning to think that they might actually survive until Heero returned. They had received an e-mail from Heero yesterday stating that the assignment had gone off without a hitch and the suspects were all charged and now in custody. Both Chang and himself were fine, no damage having been sustained by either agent and once the last of the evidence was gathered and their reports lodged, they would be returning home.

At this stage they expected Heero to return at some time in the afternoon, the day after tomorrow. Needless to say, Duo had been ecstatic and bounded around full of energy at the prospect of seeing his lover and partner again. Quatre, in his long suffering way had borne the brunt of Duo's enthusiasm, Trowa having sought the sanctuary of the kitchen and threatening anyone who came within ten feet of the doorway uninvited with a violent death by wooden spoon. That left the blonde to absorb Duo's nervous energy.

Quatre had taken the task with patience and understanding, repeatedly answering Duo's questions with a quiet reserve usually shown by nurses of mental ward patients. Come to think of it, Quatre was seriously considering checking himself in for a psyche evaluation after the week spent with the pregnant, hormonal and unpredictable man. How Heero had managed to hang onto his sanity thus far simply defied all Quatre's logic.

Things had begun to calm down a little, especially when Quatre had pointed out that they still had to admit to Heero their defeat at the straps of the baby seat. That had sobered Duo up. He hated admitting defeat to anything and the thought of what Heero would say about the three of them being beaten by a mere child's seat didn't rate high on his list of things to look forward to. He consoled himself with the thought though that at least the bruising and marks that the evil seat had inflicted upon them all were beginning to fade a bit. He could only imagine what Heero's reaction would have been had he seen the damage when it first happened. No doubt he would have been wrapped in cotton wool and banished to the bedroom for the rest of the pregnancy.

Evening had come and the three ex pilots were relaxing after a scrumptious roast pork dinner, cooked to perfection by Trowa. Duo had even had second helpings, much to Quatre's delight. The American's appetite seemed to be returning at last. Duo said it was the way that Trowa had gotten the crackling to crisp up, he loved pork crackling and certainly ate more than his share of the stuff, not that either of the other two were about to protest and take it from him.

Duo had retired to the lounge room with a book and his tub of Crunchie ice cream. He lay sprawled comfortably on the couch, a pillow underneath his lower back to support the muscles, slightly turned on his side with the book in one hand, spoon in the other and the ice cream safely wedged between his elbow, torso and the couch cushion.

Quatre wandered in to see what the pregnant man was up to and smiled. He decided to fetch a book for himself and join the other man in reading quietly. On his way to the library, Trowa had joined him and after finding out what Duo was doing and what Quatre intended to do, he asked the blonde to fetch a book for him as well whilst he fetched their respective tubs of ice cream from the freezer. After all the excitement over the past few days, Trowa thought they deserved a little treat to go with the quiet time.

The pair met up in the lounge, Duo glanced up from his book as they entered and gave a smile. "Hey, guys."

"Do you mind if we join you, Duo?" Quatre asked politely.

"Go ahead, I've no objections," Duo replied but he made sure to hug his ice cream a little closer.

Trowa sat in the chair across from Duo's head and placed his ice cream tub on the small table that sat between the chair and the couch, Duo glanced over and gave a grin before returning to his book, spoon dipping methodically into the tub of Crunchie ice cream and then to his mouth. Quatre sat sideways in the chair at the other end of the couch by Duo's feet, draping himself comfortably with his back resting against one arm and his legs dangling over the other, tub of Cherry Ripe ice cream balanced in his lap with the book perched on his knee.

Trowa lifted the lid off his Flake ice cream and dipped his spoon in, his eyes closed briefly in bliss and then he gave a soft sigh as the flavors danced over his tongue. You couldn't get any closer to heaven than this in his opinion; well, maybe if you coated Quatre in the Flake ice cream and he got to lick it off then yes, you probably could get a little closer to heaven. Come to think of it, that wasn't a bad idea. Trowa glanced briefly across to his husband and noted he was completely absorbed in his book. He made a mental note to keep some of the ice cream for later. He picked up the book that Quatre had selected for him and his eyes widened. He shook his head but opened it up anyway and began to read.

Quatre was completely absorbed in his book, it was fascinating reading, full of all sorts of information he didn't know. He wondered if Heero had in any way suffered from any of the things he was reading about. Reading a particular passage he began to snicker and mutter under his breath. "How true... Wonder if that's happened yet?... Oh shit, Heero's gonna really love that..."

Hearing the soft muttering coming from the blonde, Duo lowered his book and gave the man a quizzical look. "You okay there, Quat?"

"Fine, Duo. Can't help myself, sorry if I disturbed you."

Duo frowned as Quatre went back to his reading, still snickering from time to time. When Trowa also began to snigger he wondered if maybe something had been slipped into their ice cream. "Okay, guy's, what are you up to?"

"Nothing, just reading something interesting," came the uniform reply.

That made the American even more frustrated. He wanted to know what was up and he intended to find out.

"May I ask what it is you're reading that's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing much, just some articles on fathers and pregnancy," replied Quatre.

"A survival guide for new mothers," came Trowa's reply.

Duo nearly choked on his ice cream. "What?!"

"Did you know that a baby's poop can be any color from blackish green, varying shades of green to yellow or brown and that its consistency can range from runny, pasty, seedy to curdy?" stated Trowa.

Duo looked at the ice cream on his spoon as Trowa's words rang in his ears and felt himself begin to turn green. He dropped the spoon and confection back into the tub.

"Apparently it's all quite normal," continued Trowa.

"I pity Heero,'" came Quatre's words. "Does he know this?" Quatre began to recite a passage from the book he was reading:

"Can I Handle Her Emotional Changes?

It's a tough cookie this one. Certainly for the first pregnancy, the chances are that you will meet a side to your partner that you have never seen before, no matter how close you are. The hormonal shifts within her body can cause all sorts of strange emotions that do not fit her `normal' character, but don't worry about a "monster" in your life for 9 months, most problems are short lived and sporadic.

Each woman reacts differently to pregnancy, so no-one can tell you exactly what to expect, but here are a few examples that may give you a little insight:

First few weeks - Slightly tetchy and irritable

Around 10 weeks - Can't remember what she said 30 seconds ago

Around 15 weeks - Annoyed because there is so long to go before it is all over

Around 20 weeks - Sudden snaps of frustration/anger over an item on the news

Around 25 weeks - Cries for an hour because of an advertisement on TV (the puppy one)

Around 30 weeks - Shrieks then cries with anger because the toilet roll is fitted the wrong way around.

Around 35 weeks - Annoyed because these last few weeks are taking FOREVER!

And another thing… Whatever happens, NEVER tell her "Oh, it's just the hormones speaking" when she's having a go at you over the mess in the storeroom… that's the same as lighting the blue touch-paper and standing well back!" Quatre finished reading and looked up.

Trowa was doing his best not to burst out laughing at the stunned look on Duo's face.

"Let me clarify something here for you, Q-ball," said Duo as he raised himself slightly, a determined look on his face. "I do not get 'tetchy and irritable', I get pissed and even. I can't remember what I said yesterday, never mind thirty seconds ago. Yes, I get annoyed 'cause there's still a long way to go, you try walking around with a belly that gets bigger by the day and a kid that's determined to use your insides as a gymnasium and see if you don't get annoyed. Yes, I have a short fuse and get angry at things on the news, usually because they involve the Preventers and I'm stuck here twiddling my thumbs while my partner is out there risking life and limb. I don't cry for ages because of the puppy advert on telly, it's the kitten advert and you would be annoyed too if every time you went to the loo someone had finished off the toilet roll and hadn't replaced it, never mind putting it on the wrong way! As for hormones.... Don't even fucking start on those!"

"I hope you have lots of diapers, Duo."

Duo's head turned around to face Trowa. "Why?"

"Babies tend to go through approximately eighteen diapers in a twenty four hour period and that's not counting the ones used to catch the regurgitated milk. Come to think of it, do you even know how to change a diaper?" Trowa peered over the top of his book.

"I think I'm going to be sick," groaned Duo.

"Apparently babies are often sick, they bring up milk all the time when you've fed them and are burping them," said Trowa as his eyes continued to scan the page.

"Did Heero suffer any pregnancy symptoms, Duo?" asked Quatre.

"No, not that I know of. Why?" Duo turned back to the blonde.

"It say's here, and I quote "Many men aren't aware that one-forth of all pregnant fathers experience some form of gastrointestinal symptoms. And, in some cultures in the Yucatan, a woman's pregnancy isn't confirmed until the father has food cravings. Also, dentists are taught that if a man comes in with complaints of toothache and transient gum pain, they should inquire whether the wife is pregnant. Fathers are pregnant too!" Did Heero have any cravings?"

"Just what the hell is this, you two? Twenty questions?" Duo was becoming a little flustered.

"I hope you're not too keen on your sleep, Duo. According to this, babies usually wake every four hours for feeding until they're around three months old," stated Trowa.

"We can take it in turns to feed the baby," replied Duo smugly.

"Are you going to be feeding on demand then?"

"Feeding on what?"

"Demand," repeated Trowa.

"You know, Duo. When the baby is hungry it cries and you feed it, sort of like you in a lot of ways," Quatre offered helpfully with a grin. He really couldn't help himself.

"This is quite interesting, Duo. Listen to this... "On feeding a baby: They warn parents of "demand feeding'' infants, saying it may produce a "high-need,'' baby with symptoms of colic (excessive unexplained crying), instability in sleep and feeding cycles, perpetual need for comfort nursing, limited self-play adeptness, a demanding toddler and a tired mother, among other things.

Breastfed and bottlefed babies should be treated differently

Breastfed babies should be fed more frequently than their bottlefed counterparts, particluarly whenever they provide signals such a nuzzling, making sucking motions, fussing or crying, commonly known as `demand feeding.' " Trowa finished his quote and looked across at Duo.

Duo sat there with a vacant look on his face, Trowa's words had completely gone in one ear and out the other, barely registering at all. "I think I'll stick with the simple stuff like bottles," he muttered.

"So you're not intending to breast feed then?" asked Trowa.

"Do I look like I have the equipment here to feed a kid!?"

"No."

"Well then."

"But you don't look like you could fall pregnant and carry a baby either, Duo. Yet that happened, so why not grow breasts as well?" asked the blonde.

"For shit's sake! I've already had this discussion with Sally and we agreed no breasts."

"They would look sort of strange on him," said Trowa as he studied Duo intently.

"Oh, I don't know. Could be rather cute with that long hair and all. I mean, he doesn't really look all that strange with the big stomach once you get used to it," said Quatre as if discussing the weather.

"What size would you be, Duo?" asked Trowa.

"How the fuck should I know?"

"I'd say around a fourteen 'C' or maybe a sixteen 'B'," said Quatre as he continued to study Duo's body.

"No way, Quat! You can clean forget about any maternity bra's for me. I'm not growing breasts and that's final."

"I'll bet Heero would be disappointed."

"Huh? What the hell does that have to do with the price of eggs?"

"We all know how much you like to have Heero suck on your nipples. Just think, if you're breast feeding you could give Heero an extra boost in his milk intake," snickered Quatre.

"Ahhh... but then he could also suffer from sore and cracked nipples. According to this book they can be extremely painful. Not to mention if he doesn't produce enough milk or too much and gets mastitis," continued Trowa.

"Plus he'd need to buy maternity milk pads as well to absorb any leakage," added Quatre wisely.

"I guess he could always buy a breast pump and express the milk to feed the baby, that way Heero can share with the night time feeds," suggested Trowa.

"That's a good idea," commented Quatre. "I didn't think of that."

"I'm not some fucking cow that can be milked you know!" Duo stated heatedly.

"No one said you were, Duo." said Trowa.

"Like I already told you two, I'm not growing breasts. This baby will be raised on formula."

"But mother's milk is always better, Duo. It contains everything in it that the baby needs, not to mention the first feed is also the most vital one, the first milk contains all the rich colostrum," Quatre informed them.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Colostrum, Duo. It has all the antibodies and good stuff in it to kick start the baby's immune system and give it the good start it needs in life. You wouldn't want your child to be deprived of anything, now would you?" Quatre was chuckling away inside to himself., he was really enjoying this conversation and teasing Duo. It wasn't often they managed to pull one over the exuberant American and now that Quatre had him on the hook, he wasn't about to let this fish go, he was going to play it for all he was worth.

Duo frowned, he hadn't thought about that. "But Sally said I would need to take large doses of hormones in order to be able to produce milk and that it could be harmful to the baby and myself in the doses I'd need to take."

"I'm sure that Sally could find a way around it for you Duo," Quatre soothed. "I can just picture you now, sitting in a chair with the baby at your breast, suckling happily whilst Heero watches protectively over you both..."

"That's it! I really am going to be sick!" Duo got up from the couch as quickly as he dared and took off for the nearest toilet.

Behind him Quatre snickered. "Pay back's a real bitch isn't it, Duo?"

"Do you think I should have mentioned about the teething, nappy rashes, crying, sloppy diapers and the vomiting that sometimes occurs? Or maybe the umbilical cord stump and how it turns black and shrivels up before it drops off?" asked Trowa.

"Now I think I'm going to be sick," said Quatre.

"Then there's the fact that once the baby is born, Duo's probably going to be menstruating for around six weeks afterwards. I wonder if he would use pads or tampons to control that?" mused Trowa.

"Oh, fuck!" Quatre shot out of his seat, dropping the book to the floor, ice cream tub to the table and bolting from the room with his hand over his mouth. "Move over, Duo! I need the toilet too!"

Trowa blinked as he was suddenly deserted. "Was it something I said?" he asked the empty room. "Oh, well, let's see what this has to say about demand feeding and colicky babies..." With that, Trowa dipped his spoon back into his tub of Flake ice cream and continued with his reading.

~ * ~

tbc......

Information on babies, mothers and new fathers was taken from the following sites:

http://www.fitpregnancy.com/newlife/7?page=1

http://www.ezzo.info/Articles/ezzo_aap_table.htm

http://lifematters.com/father.html

http://www.paternityangel.com/Articles_zone/Top10Fears/Fears1.h tm