Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Going For Gold ❯ Chapter 58 ( Chapter 58 )

Disclaimer: I don't own the G boys, I just borrow them from time to time and return them a whole lot happier. I do own the plot and any other characters, especially the equines, that you will find in this fic. Please do not take them without permission. Written for pleasure not profit.

 

Pairing: 2x1x2, 3x4, 13x6, H+C

 

Warnings: Yaoi, lemon, sap, angst, vet themes, AU

 

Rating: NC 17

 

Archive: www.gundam-wing-diaries.150m.com Anyone else please ask.

 

Betaed by Yami_tai *snugs*

 

Summary: Eighteen months have passed since Heero was advised he was short listed for the Olympic games team. With Zero going well and young Shinigami almost ready to make his showjumping debut, Heero looks set to reach his goal. Life though doesn't always play by the rules.

 

Dedication: To Leslie who gave me the original idea for Equinity.

 

Fic 3 in the Equine Intervention Arc.

 

"Going for Gold"

 

January. 2007 ShenLong

 

 

Chapter 58

 

Leaving Heero in the stable with Scythe, Duo slowly made his way to the small dispensary and phone to make his call. A lump was lodged firmly in his throat, his eyes blurry with the tears he was trying desperately to hold at bay and his step was heavy. He hoped that Zechs would be available, that the other vet would come straight away - and understand Duo's reason for calling him.

 

Duo just couldn't bring himself to put Scythe to sleep. Yes, he'd euthanized many animals during his career as a vet, the majority being feline and canine, but he'd also put a few horses to sleep over the years too. As much as it pained him to have to do the job, he took solace in knowing he'd done the right thing, given relief to the animal in question, ended the pain and suffering for many an older animal.

 

But this time it was different.

 

This time it was one of his own.

 

As much as Duo knew it was the best thing for Scythe, he still couldn't bring himself to end it for her.

 

The sound of the dial tone came down the line and Duo mechanically dialed the number. It was answered within four rings.

 

“Doctor Merquise speaking.”

 

“Zechs, it's Duo.”

 

“Duo? Duo, what's wrong?” Zechs could hear the crack in the other vet's voice and was immediately on alert.

 

“It's Scythe. Zechs, I need a favor.” Duo's voice was beginning to falter.

 

“What can I do?” Zechs asked softly.

 

“I... I need you to come and...” Duo choked on his tears.

 

Zechs had a pretty good idea from the tone and cracking of Duo's voice as to what it was the other vet needed from him. “I'll be right there, Duo.”

 

“Th-thank you. We'll be in the stables.” Duo barely managed to hold the sob, his words coming out in a broken whisper.

 

“I'm on my way.” Zechs closed his cell and gazed up into the concerned blue eyes of his lover.

 

“What's wrong?” Treize asked.

 

“That was Duo. He needs me to go there, and I'm not sure exactly what is wrong but I have a feeling he wants me to put down Scythe.”

 

“Scythe?!” Treize was shocked.

 

Zechs nodded and stood up.

 

“I'm coming with you,” Treize stated firmly and grabbed his coat.

 

“Thank you,” Zechs replied and made his way out to his car, Treize beside him.

 

* * *

 

Hanging up the receiver, Duo took a moment to try and get himself together. He succeeded in a manner of sorts and turned to go back out to the stable and Scythe. Entering the stable block, he looked up to see Zero gazing at him from over his stable door. The liquid, brown eyes of the stallion followed his movements and Duo found himself drawn to the gray. Pausing at Zero's door, Duo gave the soft face a gentle stroke. Zero nudged him gently, somehow sensing that all was not well with the nice human.

 

“Oh, shit, Zero. I call myself a vet and yet there's nothing I can do for Scythe,” he muttered miserably.

 

Zero rubbed his nose against Duo's shoulder.

 

“Fucking hell, I can't even end her suffering for her. I'm a coward, Zero, a fraud, nothing but a useless, no good idiot.”

 

Wuffling softly, Zero knew there was something upsetting the nice human and did his best to try and comfort the man who treated him so well.

 

With another pat to Zero's neck, Duo took a deep breath and tried to steel himself for what was to come. Leaving Zero, he walked over to Scythe's stable and entered quietly. Scythe remained lying down, Heero sitting by her head and talking in a low, soothing tone to the mare. It caused Duo's heart to ache even more.

 

Hearing Duo return, Heero looked up. “Did you manage to get Zechs?” he asked, voice almost a whisper.

 

“Yes. He will be here shortly.” Duo moved to crouch beside his lover and pet Scythe's neck. “How is she?”

 

“She seems to be okay so far. She's not had another attack,” Heero replied.

 

“Good.”

 

The pair sat in silence for a moment, each petting the mare and lost in their thoughts.

 

“I'm going to miss her,” Heero finally said, breaking the silence.

 

“I will too,” Duo said.

 

“We need to let Quatre know.”

 

“I can do that tomorrow.”

 

“And Hilde and Catherine.”

 

“They can wait until tomorrow too.”

 

“Are you sure there's nothing we can do? That your diagnosis is correct?” Heero wasn't doubting Duo in the least, rather he was grasping at straws, his brain trying to deny the inevitable.

 

“Heero, I'm sure.”

 

A tear tracked down Heero's cheek and Duo felt his heart rip in two.

 

“Damn it all! I wish there was something I could do. I feel so fucking helpless. Call myself a vet and I can't do fuck all to help Scythe.”

 

“Duo, stop it. This isn't your fault.”

 

“But I should be able to do something, Heero. All those years of study, shit loads of practical and I'm fucking sitting here twiddling my thumbs! It's not fair!” Duo's voice was beginning to rise as he took out his frustration on himself. A hand to his arm had him faltering.

 

“Duo, this isn't your fault, there's nothing you or any other vet can do for her. If there was, I'm sure you would have already thought of it and would be doing it right now. We have to face the facts, as cruel as they are, that it's Scythe's time to go. I hate the thought of losing her too, I don't want to let her go; but as you said yourself, it's the kindest thing to do.” Heero couldn't say anything more, his voice began to crack and he started to choke on his words.

 

Knowing all the facts, having searched his mind, all his knowledge regarding the equine race, Duo knew in his heart that there wasn't anything he could do. It didn't make it any easier though.

 

Heero tugged gently on Duo's arm, pulling the vet closer to him and wrapping his arm around his lover's shoulders. No further words were exchanged, the pair leaned into each other, gently petting the mare and drawing comfort and strength from each other.

 

* * *

 

Zechs drove carefully through the evening twilight, his mind thinking about Duo's words. He didn't know what was wrong with the mare, but it had to be serious for Duo to call him and ask what he had. Duo was an excellent vet, compassionate, kind and with a genuine passion for his work. He had no doubts that whatever was wrong with the mare, Duo would have exhausted all avenues available to him to treat her.

 

“Are you okay?”

 

Treize's soft words broke into Zechs' thoughts and he spared a brief glance to his lover. “Yeah, just thinking.”

 

Treize couldn't argue with that, his mind was also awash with thought of what could possibly be wrong. Unfortunately, they wouldn't know until they arrived. “Got any ideas at all as to what the problem could possibly be?”

 

“Not really, it could be anything.”

 

“True.” Treize sighed and took to gazing out the car window at the gathering dusk.

 

Another ten minutes and they were pulling into Duo's driveway, following it along to the stable complex ahead. Pulling the car to a stop, Zechs cut the engine and took a deep breath in preparation for what lay ahead. Treize lay a hand upon his arm and Zechs found himself lost in the blue depths of his lover's eyes.

 

“I'm here for you,” Treize said simply and then leaned in to place a loving kiss to those sweet lips.

 

Accepting the kiss Zechs found it gave him a little more confidence to deal with whatever lay ahead.

 

They stepped from the car and walked towards the stables.

 

* * *

 

“Zechs is here,” Heero murmured, hearing the familiar sound of a vehicle pulling into the stable yard.

 

“I'll go meet him,” said Duo and reluctantly pulled away from Heero's embrace. He brushed the shavings from his jeans and exited the stable. He met up with Zechs at the large doors to the stable complex, noting Treize with the other vet.

 

“Thank you for coming, Zechs, Treize,” Duo greeted in a low tone.

 

“No thanks needed,” Zechs replied. He took in Duo's appearance and swallowed hard.

 

Treize also noted Duo's appearance, especially the defeated look in those usually vibrant eyes. There were lines of fatigue etched around his mouth and eyes and those eyes also appeared a little red. If Duo looked this bad he hated to think what Heero looked like.

 

Zechs was thinking along similar lines, he'd never seen Duo look so upset or lost before. Placing a hand upon Duo's arm, he turned the other vet to walk back into the stable building. “Can you give me the entire story?” he asked gently.

 

Duo nodded.

 

“Okay. We'll go over to the dispensary and talk there. Treize, would you mind finding Heero and staying with him whilst I discuss the case with Duo, please?”

 

“Of course.” Treize understood the need for a little privacy and readily agreed, besides, he was worried about Heero too.

 

“Heero's in Scythe's stable,” Duo managed to whisper out.

 

“Thank you.” Treize didn't say anymore, he could tell this was serious and made a beeline for Scythe's stable and his pupil.

 

Zechs managed to get Duo into the dispensary where he closed the door and turned to face the other vet. “What is happening, Duo? I know what you said on the 'phone, but you haven't told me what the diagnosis is.”

 

Knowing how the world of medicine worked, Duo needed to give Zechs the full diagnosis and current treatment of Scythe before the other vet could be expected to do anything. Taking a deep breath, he managed to keep his voice from cracking as he gave Zechs all the information he had.

 

“Oh, shit. Duo, I'm so sorry,” Zechs said, the sincerity in his voice genuine. “You're absolutely certain it's heart failure?”

 

“I'm positive. I did some blood tests. The slides are still by the microscope and I'd appreciate it if you took a look too, just to confirm the diagnosis for me.”

 

“No problem.” Zechs moved to where Duo's microscope was set up and picked up one of the slides. He stared down the eyepiece, noted what he saw and then slipped the next slide in. There was no doubting the results.

 

With a heavy heart, Zechs turned back to his friend and colleague. “Do you mind if I examine her?”

 

“Of course. This way.” Duo stood up from the chair he was sitting in and led the way back to the stable Scythe was lying in.

 

* * *

 

Treize had made his way across to Scythe's stable, pausing to pet Zero as he passed. Glancing over the top of the door he could clearly see the black mare lying down, Heero seated by her head and petting the mare's neck. “Okay for me to come in?” Treize asked.

 

Glancing around, Heero spotted Treize and heard the question. “Of course, come in, Treize.”

 

The tall man entered the stable and crouched by Heero. “How is she?”

 

“Not good.” Heero swallowed past the lump in his throat and continued, his voice was a little unsteady. “She's had a heart attack, two that we know of. Duo says it's heart failure and there's nothing we can do to help her.”

 

Treize felt his heart plummet with those words. “Oh, Heero. I'm so sorry. Are you sure there's nothing that can be done?”

 

Heero shook his head, unable to speak.

 

Treize let his hand drop to Heero's shoulder and squeezed. “If there's anything I can do, just name it.”

 

“Thank you for coming,” Heero whispered. “It's a comfort to know other people care.”

 

“We do care, Heero.” Treize didn't say anything else, he knew Heero wasn't up to speaking and words weren't necessary anyway. Treize left his hand resting gently on Heero's shoulder whilst his other hand stroked along the mare's neck.

 

Zechs and Duo entered the stable then, Zechs immediately running his eyes over the horse and taking in all he could.

 

“I'd like Zechs to examine Scythe, if that's okay with you, Heero. Just in case there's something I've missed,” Duo said softly.

 

“Okay.” Heero had no objection. He didn't think that Zechs would come up with any other diagnosis than the one Duo had already given; but there was always that slim chance. Besides, Heero could understand that Duo wanted to be certain.

 

Treize gave Heero a hand to stand up and gently guided the man to stand off to one side and allow Zechs to work. The blonde vet repeated what Duo had done earlier. He took the mare's temperature, breathing and heart rate, listened to her heart through the stethoscope, palpitated around her abdomen and checked the color of her eyes and gums. Having checked everything he could, he stood and straightened up, his face giving nothing away whilst inside he was a turmoil of emotion.

 

Three sets of eyes turned expectantly towards him.

 

“As much as it saddens me to say this, I have to agree with your diagnosis, Duo. It's heart failure.”

 

Treize felt the defeated slump of Heero's shoulders and turned his concerned eyes in Zechs' direction. “Is there anything you can do for her?”

 

“I wish there was,” Zechs sighed. “But I'm afraid that it wouldn't matter what drugs we use to treat her with, nothing will stop the inevitable. The drugs will only ease the symptoms and at best, possibly give her a few more days. Right now she's not suffering or in any form of distress other than the lethargy that we can see.”

 

Everyone went quiet with Zechs' words, each man knowing what the other vet was trying to say in the kindest way possible.

 

“After looking at everything, I'm afraid I agree with Duo's prognosis and his suggested… treatment.”

 

Heero's eyes filled with tears. He knew Duo had been right, having Zechs confirm it made it a little easier to live with his decision. “Zechs?”

 

“Yes, Heero?”

 

“Could you?”

 

Knowing what Heero was trying to ask, Zechs nodded. “I understand, Heero. I'll go get myself organized, Treize can come and help me. Whilst I'm doing that, both you and Duo can take all the time you need with Scythe.”

 

“Thank you,” Heero whispered.

 

Treize followed Zechs out of the stable and headed back to his car to fetch the items he needed, leaving the other two alone with the mare to say their goodbyes.

 

Immediately they were alone, Heero was back at Scythe's head, petting the mare whilst he gave in to the tears and let them fall. He didn't care if he looked weak, he loved Scythe and it was so hard to let her go.

 

Duo was in a similar situation. All the times he'd comforted other pet owners, run through the words of the animal feeling no pain, that this was the kindest thing to do, the animal would simply drift off to sleep played through his mind. Now that it was one of his own, Duo was having difficulty coming to terms with it.

 

Oh he knew all the facts, knew that Scythe wouldn't feel anything, but it didn't make it any easier. His own tears tracked down his face as he bent to pet the black neck and say farewell to the mare he'd come to love so much.

 

“I'm sorry, Scythe, I wish there was something I could do for you, anything to make you better, but I can't.” Duo's voice broke then and he buried his head in the mare's mane as the sobs began to tear from him.

 

“Goodbye, girl,” Heero whispered. “I'll miss you so much. You were one of the best, Scythe, and I'm so privileged to have owned you.” Heero's voice began to fail him. “Thank you for everything you gave me; Shinigami, your sweet nature and your faithfulness; but most of all, thank you for giving me your love and trust.”

 

Scythe knew there was something going on, knew in her own heart that it was her time to go and she was ready for it. She'd had a good life with these nice humans and loved them both for treating her so well. She would be sad to leave them, but she was tired, so very tired. She tried to push her muzzle against her master's hand, succeeding and blowing gently through her nostrils, trying to let her master know it was going to be alright. She gave a low whinny and pricked her ears when four answering whinnies came back. She wuffled again and then rubbed her head against her master's shoulder.

 

Hearing the low whinny, Zero, Shini, Wing and Angel all whinnied back. They knew there was something seriously wrong, they could sense it. Zero moved over to stand by the partition that separated his stable from the sweet mare's. On the other side, Angel did the same. Wing and Shinigami hung over their stable doors.

 

Duo managed to get himself back under control and raised his tear streaked face from Scythe's mane. He shuffled around to the mare's head and petted her gently. Heero moved back a little to allow Duo to say his own goodbye and try to get himself back under control.

 

“I'll miss you, Scythe. You've been such a good horse, a sweet mare and a pleasure to handle. You've given me many hours of pleasure, going for rides through the bush and just being a friendly ear to talk to. I'm glad we could make the last years of your life better for you, you deserved it. I don't care what anyone says, I know there is an afterlife, call it heaven if you like and I'm certain you are going there and that someday we will meet again.” With one last pat, Duo moved away, noting Zechs standing just outside the stable. Swallowing the lump in his throat and wiping away the fresh tears, he went to speak with the other vet.

 

Heero sat back by Scythe's head, resting the mare's head across his legs and in his lap. Gently he pulled at her ears, whispered nonsense to her and generally made a fuss of her. He became aware of Zechs entering the stable, Treize and Duo with him and he looked up.

 

“Heero, it's time,” Duo said softly.

 

Heero nodded.

 

Zechs crouched beside Heero and spoke softly. “Do you want to stay? Or would you prefer to leave?”

 

“I-I'll stay,” Heero choked out.

 

“Okay. I promise you, Heero, she won't feel any pain at all. I'll give her a mild sedative first and then the anesthetic. She will simply drift off to sleep.”

 

“Th-Thank you.”

 

Nodding to Treize, Zechs moved back a little to the mare's neck, allowing Duo to sit next to Heero and be there for his lover. Treize moved to Zechs' side, needles in hand and ready to assist.

 

There are two ways vets use to put large animals such as horses to sleep. One is using a humane killer which is like a gun but working on air pressure. The other is by injection. [1] The majority of people prefer the use of injection, considering it to be a much more humane way to put the animal to sleep. Most vets, Duo and Zechs included, also prefer to use the injection method.

 

Duo made sure to keep himself between Heero and Zechs as best he could, mainly so Heero wouldn't see what was happening. Not that Heero appeared to be watching, his attention was completely on Scythe and petting the mare, talking to her and keeping her calm.

 

Swabbing the area on Scythe's neck where the vein lay, Zechs took the sedative from Treize and began to inject it. It would make Scythe relax, remain calm and make her a little sleepy too.

 

As the drug flowed into her system, Scythe's muscles began to loosen, relaxing and slumping a little. Her head became heavy and she settled it more comfortably into Heero's lap where her nice master continued to pet and talk to her. She wasn't frightened, rather she was calm and ready to sleep. She'd enjoyed her last years of her life, good food, lots of love and attention; she was content.

 

Waiting for several minutes for the sedative to completely kick in, Zechs made a visual check of the mare, catching Duo's eye in the process. Duo nodded to Zechs and turned back to Heero and the mare.

 

Taking the last drug from Treize, Zechs slipped the needle into the vein and injected the contents. It worked swiftly, acting exactly like an anesthetic. Scythe felt herself drifting off, she gave a low wuffle through her nostrils and relaxed peacefully, her ears twitching one last time as she heard her master and the other nice human's voices telling her everything would be okay.

 

Zechs rested his fingers against the pulse point, feeling the heart beat slow and then stop. One last puff of air escaped the mare and then she was completely still. Zechs moved forward a little to Scythe's head and checked the mare's eye for a corneal reflex - there was none. Looking up at Treize, the rider raised an eyebrow in question. Zechs nodded silently then motioned with his head towards the stable door. Treize acknowledged and began to move quietly to the door.

 

Raising himself slightly, Zechs paused and rested a hand on Duo's shoulder. “We will leave now, unless you wish for us to stay,” he said softly.

 

Duo looked up, tears in his eyes and gave a soft smile of thanks. “No, you go, Zechs. Thank you.”

 

“I'll call you later to see how Heero is, and yourself.”

 

“Thanks, I'd appreciate that.”

 

“Take care, Duo.” With another light squeeze, Zechs left the pair alone with their grief.

 

The pair continued to sit for a while, each lost in his own thoughts, Heero's hand running absently over the still head. It was completely dark outside when Duo decided Heero needed to move. Feeling Duo's hand tugging at his arm, Heero looked up into the sad violet of his partner's eyes.

 

“Come on, Heero. You need to leave her now and come up to the house and get warm.”

 

Heero nodded and began to shift. The tears had fallen until there were no more left to shed, he felt numb, his body not wanting to cooperate and he felt Duo's arm come around his waist to support him. Scythe's head was lifted and laid gently in the shavings, Heero giving her one last pat before allowing Duo to lead him out of the stable and back to the house.

 

Sitting Heero down in one of the kitchen chairs, Duo assisted him to remove his boots and then put the kettle on to make a cup of tea for them both. He was a little worried about Heero's apparent 'comatose' state, but knew it was the other man's way of coping with things. Heero had never been one to openly display his emotions, rather he would withdraw quietly into himself until the emotional distress had passed. Duo was quite prepared to give Heero his space and time to grieve, but he wasn't going to let him completely withdraw.

 

Setting the mug down in front of his lover, Duo sat next to Heero with his own tea. “You okay?” Duo asked quietly.

 

“Yeah. I'll be fine,” Heero relied absently and picked up his mug. The hot liquid thawed him out a little - and helped to soothe his soul.

 

“Heero?” Duo reached over and took Heero's hand in his own, rubbing his thumb soothingly over the back of it. “As much as I don't want to bring this up now, there's something else we need to discuss.”

 

Heero had an idea of what was coming and he sighed deeply. “I know.”

 

“What is it you want to do?”

 

Heero thought for a moment, then swallowing, he spoke. “I'd prefer to have her buried, Duo. If that's okay with you and the local shire regulations.”

 

“I was thinking along the same lines,” Duo replied. “The shire regulations permit the burial, providing certain guidelines are met, and they aren't difficult to meet. I think we should bury her in her paddock, under the big gum tree she loved to stand under.”

 

Lost in thought, it took Heero a moment before he replied. “I think she would like that, Duo. Thank you.”

 

Wrapping his arms around Heero, Duo rested his face in the crook of Heero's neck, feeling his partner's arms reciprocate. “I'm sorry, Heero.”

 

“Not your fault, Duo. Please don't blame yourself. You've done more than anyone possibly could have and for that, I'm eternally grateful. She's at peace now.”

 

“Yes, yes she is.”

 

* * *

 

In the stables the other four horses were quiet. All knew in their own way that Scythe had left them. They also knew, as only animals can, that they would meet again.

 

In paddocks filled with rich, green grass and tumbling streams, a black mare galloped free, her mane and tail blowing wildly in the breeze as she cavorted about.

 

In the night sky, a new star shone brightly, sparkling clearly and brilliantly.

 

~ * ~

 

tbc...

 

[1] The information on heart attacks and euthanasia of horses comes from my own personal experience. Having lost my mare to a heart attack several years ago and then having had to make the heartbreaking decision to have my faithful showjumper, Teddy Bear, put to sleep back in February 2007.

 

For further information visit this web site which is a clear and easy report of how euthanasia works in the equine world. http://www.equineprotectionnetwork.com/rescue/euth.htm