InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Bound For Tomorrow: Sesshomaru and Rin ❯ Morning After ( Chapter 13 )

Sesshomaru lay awake, unable to sleep. For hours he listened to Rin's heart beat, memorized her breathing, and felt the small twitches her body made as she dreamed. Inevitably he propped himself up to gaze over her shoulders and watched her chest move in rhythm with her deep and even inhales and exhales, and could not look away.

His eyes traced the outline she made, sleeping on her side. The round top of her dark head, the dip into her neck, the sharp incline to her shoulders, the way her ribs tapered down until the delicate curve of her tiny waist and the pronounced flair of her hip. All these smooth lines leading to rounded thighs and slightly bend knees, well shaped calves and small delicate ankles. Her feet, roughened from years of shoe-less travel called to him, the only part of her body that was not perfectly soft, but the imperfection only adding to her overall beauty.

The sun had barely begun to peak over the horizon when the internal battle began. Should he wake her? Would she be angry? How long did humans need to sleep, anyway? Would it be selfish to wake her? Was he being too demanding?

Deciding against waking her, there was a new slippery slope to slide. Would it be wrong to touch her? She is my mate, mine… but, would it be violation to touch her in her sleep? Would she think me perverted, be disgusted with my inability to restrain myself? Perhaps she would find it endearing, that I could not resist her even while she slumbers? Would it be molesting her? Taking advantage? She is mine… but…

Despite his inner dialog, his hand burned to touch her skin once more and, losing the battle with himself the pad of his thumb ghosted across her nipple. Never had he found himself so fascinated with a woman's breast before. They were always thought of as…functional. For food, to nourish pups, not for his own perverse…enjoyment.

Now, he could not help but to stare, and when the sleeping girl had no reaction to his touching her nipple, he became bolder, lightly curving his palm around the underside of the soft full mound of her breast, allowing the barest hint of its weight to rest on his hand. Still, she did not stir.

He became hyper-focused on his hand, the breast he cradled, and allowed his thumb to move teasingly over the nipple, and, even in her sleep, it hardened against his light touch. He was unaware of the low smooth pleased sounding growl in his chest as he continued to fondle his new mate. The world faded away until nothing but the sight of his hand on her existed, and he missed the increase in her heart rate…

A small smile curved her lips and, without opening her eyes Rin murmured contentedly, “Enjoying yourself?”

Sesshomaru snatched his had back so fast it was a blur, embarrassed to be caught manhandling the girl in her sleep, and, while his features remained stoic, he quickly looked away, like a guilty child caught stealing a sticky sweet roll, he could not face his accuser.

Rin pouted, and finally turned over to face her molester. Her eyes drifted lazily open and her bottom lip came out in just a hint of exaggeration.

Mistaking her look for one of displeasure, Sesshomaru made to lower himself to apologize… something that he had a feeling he may need to get more used to doing, if what other mated males said held any truth.

“Gome-”

His eyes widened when Rin jerked her head up and kissed him quickly on the lips, silencing his apology, “Why did you stop?” she whispered huskily, reaching for his hand and moving it back to her breast. As if by instinct he was immediately again kneading and massaging. Sesshomaru pulled back to look her in the eye as he answered blandly,

“You were asleep.” He stated as if this should be the obvious answer to her question. What he was doing was clearly wrong, even if he could not have explained why it was wrong.

“But what a wonderful way to wake up…” Rin murmured, pressing her body close to his once again and snuggling against him, forcing his hand away from her breast and to her back, where he trailed down, following the curve of her behind and coming back up to linger at the tip of her tail bone. How odd it must be… to never have experienced having a tail… How are humans able to keep such balance, never having known a proper counter weight?

“What is it like…” He asked, before he could stop himself, before he could think to not remind Rin that he was not human at all… despite this forms appearance.

For some reason he could not determine he was not very keen on the idea of making her think of him in his true form at the moment. Of course she knew what he was… she'd seen him semi-transformed more times than he could recall and seen his true form on a handful of occasions, but he was suddenly very self conscious of the fact that he was a dog.

Never had such a thing ever been a question in his mind. He was not human, he was a dog. If one had asked him to identify himself there would never have been shame in the word `Inu' coming before `youkai'… it was as simple as saying he was male. Quite the opposite actually, he had always abhorred humans, never wanted to be like them in any way, and yet now that his mate was a different species than he was it was suddenly more…obvious to him exactly what he was. He was somehow more aware of himself than he ever had been before.

Ironically, mokomoko began to twitch unconsciously, and Rin noticed, thinking it may have been a reaction to her weight having been upon it for so long and she shifted to allow him to remove her `pillow' if he chose, when he didn't Rin asked, “Sesshomaru, am I uncomfortable on your fur?”

Sesshomaru snatched the fur back and moved it once again behind his shoulder. He did so so quickly that Rin was left to stare in awe. Had she said something wrong?

“Se-Sesshomaru-sama?” Seeing the clouded far away look in his eyes and the slight furrow to his brow Rin was suddenly very unsure of things… She was already beginning to feel the affects of their bonding mark and what she could tell of his emotions was…uncertainty. Never had he seemed to second guess himself, although, she supposed that, until now, she had no way of knowing if this was typical for him or not… his face betrayed nothing, even to her, at the moment.

At hearing Rin once again use the honorific with his name Sesshomaru snapped out of his reverie, and focused his gaze on her.

“Did I… what's wrong?” Rin was becoming more and more unsettled with each passing moment of silence, until finally, Sesshomaru spoke again.

“Does it bother you, that I am inu?” Sesshomaru did not know why he chose now to ask Rin something of this magnitude, especially now that it was too late to do anything if it did bother her. She was marked, they were mated and therefore bound together… still, what was this need he had to hear her say again that she was not disturbed or ashamed to be his?

Sesshomaru himself would have killed the person who dared to utter the word insecure in his direction…

Rin gave a small smile and stroked mokomoko for a moment, before bringing her hand up to trace the stripes adorning her demon-lovers face, watching as his eyes bored intently into hers. “No.” She answered simply.

*Flashback*

Sesshomaru distanced himself from her. It was for the best. Now that Rin had not only seen him in his true form, but been through such a harrowing experience as dying again, (not to mention having met his mother - a harrowing experience in and of itself), it could only be assumed that she would fear him.

He allowed the boy to tend to her need for food and water, and watched as she settled in for the night - for the first time in a long time, not asking if she could sleep either near him or on his lap.

It will be nice to be so unencumbered, once again. It was a most troublesome ritual that was in need of correcting anyway…

He forced his eyes not gaze on her, forced his ears not to train on her heart rate and breathing and forced himself not to focus on her scent. He willed himself into a meditative state, and waited patiently for morning to come, and with it, the girl's enevitable request to depart his company.

Being so distracted, and so entirely focused on blocking her out it was with some alarm that he felt a tiny hand on his thigh. Instinctively he reached out with his one arm and his clawed hand wrapped around her tiny wrist, halting her movement.

Wide eyes with unshed tears gazed up at him, and a tiny pink lower lips trembled, being wetted by a small pink tongue several times, as he heard Rin take gulping breaths. Only then did he realize that his grip must be uncomfortable for her, and he briefly wondered why the girl had not protested such mistreatment.

“Sesshomaru-sama is angry with Rin.” The girl stated, bowing her head. He saw and smelled tear drops fall to the ground, the scent of salt mixing with the soil in a most displeasing way. How was it that this girl was so easily able to read everything about him, except his feelings when it came to her? “Gomen Sesshomaru-sama… gomenasai… gomen, gomen gomen…” the girl began to stutter and repeat. “Please… please… please…”the chant became, after a few minutes of his non-reaction.

“Rin, for what do you ask?” He finally answered, bewildered and becoming slightly annoyed that she begged, but did not state what she was begging for. Humans begged him, so often, but usually it was for their lives. He owed no human anything, and so, was unaccustomed to hearing them ask him for anything, save mercy - which was not a trait he counted among his virtues.

The girl completely broke down at that point, heaving shaking sobs wracking her small frame and mucus thickening her words, “Please, Se-se-se-se-shoooo-hooho-ma-ma-ruuuuuu-sahahahamahamahamaha.”

His clawed and only hand came out to rest upon the girls head, before sliding down to brush over her cheek. Such was the `comfort' he'd offered only several hours ago- and, at the time the gesture had been foreign, but instinctual. This time, it was not the `natural' thing for him to do - and was only repeated, because of it's earlier success. He simply needed to stop this unbecoming display, and experience had proven this to be an effective method of staving off these… tears which made him wholly uncomfortable, after all - what did he know of silencing the tears of a human girl child? The only way he knew to end humans' begging was to simply rip their tongue from their mouth, effectively putting an end to such useless mutterings. That was not an acceptable solution, in this situation. He could not ever harm this girl, though, why his hand refused to strike, or what it was that staved off the title wave of disgust for her, when all others of her kind elicited only revulsion, would remain a mystery to him.

“Rin. Calm yourself.” He ordered his voice sure and strong, despite the fact that there was a strange ache in the center of his chest that he could not identify with any word he knew, or compare to any feeling he had had before in his long life. It did not seem like the pain of injury, but… she was… hurting him. It hurt to see her… hurt.

Why?

Immediately the girl calmed, to the best of her ability, and sought to answer his previous question. She raised her eyes once more, dark and serious. The expression seemed so out of place on a child so young as her, but it seemed that what she was going to say was of the utmost importance to her - and the sincerity reflected in those depths unnerved him. Never had anything been so completely… heavy in her eyes. Even when she had been beaten black and blue - with the scent of adult human males all over her body - she had smiled. There was no smile now, no light or easy laughter in her face.

“Please,” she took a deep ragged breath, “Do not hate, Rin.”

Do not hate Rin… Do not hate Rin… Do not… hate… Rin???

It was he who had failed her.

It was he who had taken her to a place that was dangerous, because in his arrogance, and his distraction with other thoughts, he had been careless with her life - placing her within easy striking distance of his mother - the gatekeeper to hell. It was he who, despite his being the wielder of Tenseiga, had been unable to call her soul back from the depths of that dark place. Even when every other soul had been purified by him… still… Rin laid cold and dead in his single armed embrace.

She had seen him transform, and… there was no denying the girl had been… alarmed. She had not realized the true nature or size of her guardian before that day, and - perhaps she had felt as if he may have deceived her, in some way. Tricked her into following him, by taking human form, only to discover he was a giant white beast, beneath the clever façade. True, the majority of the time he was in his humanoid form - but that was not what he truly was.

His ki was that of a great phantom dog, and the beast dwelled within. He was it and it was him and even in his human-like form the beast within lurked, constantly at the ready to reveal itself.

The only time that beast within ever wagged its tail, was when Rin graced him with a smile. The only time it lowered its front end to ground and raised its haunches in a playful move… was when Rin played. The only time it whimpered was when the girl was in distress. The only time it curled up contentedly, with its tail covering its nose, was when the girl slumbered peacefully in his human lap.

His inner beast, more than he would ever admit, was attached to the girl. If only she knew how she had tamed him…

The thought was wholly ridiculous; a small human girl with a giant white demon guard dog, completely content to curl around her slumbering form, and willing to jump into battle to protect its young mistress.

Ready and willing to serve.

HIM.

He was now the guard dog, and personal attack dog of a young human girl - who had been in existence for less than nine cycles of the seasons.

How utterly… ironic.

He actually chuckled aloud at his ridiculous train of thought.

Damn his youkai. Damn his youkai for choosing a human whelp as the one to serve and protect.

His father's rumbling laugh was echoing off the furthest caverns of hell, Sesshomaru was sure of it.

Rin looked up, startled at his uncharacteristic chuckle, “Sesshomaru-sama?”

Immediately, he was serious once again. His lapse of character was brief, but real.

“This Sesshomaru does not, and could not hateRin.” He admitted quietly.

The girl brightened immediately, so easy to please, he marveled. He had not said that he loved her, or even more than tolerated her. The fact he did not despise her very existence was enough to fill her scent with contented happiness. She asks nearly nothing of me.

“Rin, come.” He removed his only hand from her cheek at long last, beckoning the girl to her usual sleeping place - on his lap, with his fur curled around her, and used to cushion her head.

The terrible great white beast inside him huffed, and curled around her in contentment.

The humanoid form merely rested his hand lightly on the side of her small dark head, occasionally running the backs of his knuckles over the skin of her smooth soft cheek.

Then, he stiffened.

The beast inside huffed again, a single sentiment, before falling into slumber.

Mine.

Sesshomaru knew then that he was damned.

His youkai had chosen.

Rin was his.

He felt the corners of his lips tip upwards slightly… Yes. His Rin.

~*~

*End Flashback*

Rin reached up and pulled him down for a kiss, her lips ghosting over his own. When she pulled back, she purred huskily, “On my hands and knees then?”

Sesshomaru felt himself harden instantly at her suggestion. The great beast inside licked it's chops; the humanoid form growled deeply. “In a moment. First…” He lowered himself, placing his head between her thighs and inhaling deeply. His long rough tongue coming out to lap at her sweet core. His own scent and taste still strongly present both on and in her most secret place.

The predator inside awakened, and he attacked her opening and bud unrelentingly with his oral ministrations. When she found completion under the caress of his lips and tongue he growled darkly, once again proclaiming, “MINE.” Before he backed away and allowed his all too willing female to present herself for their mutual satisfaction.

He pumped into her body, long languid strokes. His chest to her back and his hands coming from underneath, hooked around her shoulders pulling her back to him as he came forward.

Oh yes… he was going to enjoy being mated - thoroughly.