InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Memories of Pleasure and Shame ❯ Sunset ( Chapter 14 )

Characters owned by: Rumiko Takahashi, Viz Entertainment, ECT.

I make no profit from this story

 

 

Chapter 14: Sunset

 

 

~ “Oh Sesshoumaru…that feels so…hhmmm,” Inuyasha moans erotically, leaning against a giant tree, as on his knees in front of him, Sesshoumaru continues to move his mouth and hand against Inuyasha's cock at a frantic pace, somewhere in an inconspicuous area of a misty evening forest. “Oooo…hhh-Sesshoumaru!” “Mmmm…” “Ah-ha-sss! Hah-aaaaahh!!!” Inuyasha cums bitterly and heavily, quenching Sesshoumaru's thirst with his refreshing fluids. ~

 

- After Sesshoumaru gets his pants and fundoshi back over his body and secures his armor and ties his obi, he majestically drifts over towards Inuyasha who is immersed in the replacement of his pants and fundoshi as well. After finishing up, Inuyasha turns around as he senses Sesshoumaru standing behind him. Inuyasha gazes at him curiously before Sesshoumaru asks, “So where are you proceeding off to now… Inuyasha?” Inuyasha senses the slight sarcasm underlining Sesshoumaru's deep tenor. He answers, “Who…me…meeeh…I'm…just going back to the village to help out Kaede… with something.” Sesshoumaru stares at him with a dead-panned expression, being able to perceive Inuyasha's perfidiousness without even having to use his extra senses. “Hmph,” he finally grunts before abruptly turning away from Inuyasha as he leaves him with a foreboding sideward glance. While Inuyasha continues to watch Sesshoumaru's back, as he gracefully steps further and further away, Sesshoumaru mumbles, “I'm not stupid Inuyasha…avoid the well or suffer my wrath.” Inuyasha remains silent. In the mist of Inuyasha's lack of response, Sesshoumaru suddenly ceases movement, but continues to stand facing away from his younger sibling. Finally Inuyasha replies, “Are you serious?” Then he snorts before uttering sarcastically as he continues tauntingly, “What are ya gonna do, melt my dick off or somethin'?” Sesshoumaru replies in his typical dry tone of voice, “Do you find me to be an imbecile Inuyasha? Why would I punish MYSELF by inflicting something as permanent as castration upon you?” He mumbles the last of his sentence through clenched teeth, “Perhaps punching you in the nuts repeatedly is more sufficient.” Inuyasha gulps with terror as his eyes grow large.

 

After remaining frozen in place for a moment, Inuyasha suddenly bursts off comically in the opposite direction of Sesshoumaru (of course). Sesshoumaru continues to stay fixed in place with his head turned sideways, gazing bitterly out of the corner of his eyes until Inuyasha's scent is some distance away. “Hmph,” Sesshoumaru grunts finally as he folds his arms in a sulky manner with a disgruntled expression. Preoccupied with deep emotions of resentfulness and rage (inspite of there being many others for him to choose to focus on), Sesshoumaru violently thrusts his clenched fists to his sides, trembling with eyes transforming, as he goes on a swearing spree in his mind in order to let off some steam, `Why do I continuously endure such FUCKING debasement?! Am I some kind of FUCKING toy he believes he can FUCKING play with and then FUCKING disregard for a hideous FUCKING ningen miko!' “AAAARRRGH!!!” With a fearsome facial expression, Sesshoumaru whips out his lethal claws before going on a maniacal tree slicing spree, with an added touch of sizzling and melting (poor trees). After he has practically sliced down half a forest, his feet nimbly touch back down onto the ground. He pants heavily for a while, with his fingers menacingly curled at his sides as the flaming red glow in his eyes gradually begins to subside. After reestablishing his characteristic stony expression; surrounded by his transport bubble, he flies off at the speed of light. It takes Sesshoumaru no more than a few seconds to reach his destination, but unfortunately by the time he has arrived, Inuyasha has already disappeared into the well. Sesshoumaru begins to think to himself nervously, `His scent stops right at the well. He must have gotten through this time.' The feelings of dread, insecurity and heartbreak that Sesshoumaru had mostly always been successful in suppressing, suddenly overwhelms his being. He tries to push down the pain, but for some reason it just won't dissipate this time. With a face shaded with the color of intense sorrow and desperation he whispers with a trembling voice, “Inuyasha,” as he continues to peer down into the wells mysterious and ominous depths, feeling utterly helpless.

 

- Finally after a couple seconds of being surrounded by what appears to be a midnight sky painted with stars; it all suddenly disappears and afterwards Inuyasha finds himself at the bottom of another well. `It finally let me through,' he thinks to himself with amazement before leaping out and heading towards Kagome's house. As Kagome sleeps soundly in her bed, her rest is abruptly interrupted by the sound of a thud. She sits up suddenly before turning around towards her right, swiftly. As she stares ahead of her in complete shock, she whispers, after a short delay, “Inuyasha?” The slightly shadowed figure in the room is silent for a moment before whispering tenderly, “Kagome.” After a few more moments of staring at each other in astonishment, suddenly tears begin to well up in Kagome's eyes, as her face becomes contorted with despair and heartbreak. She hastily leaps out of the bed before dramatically speeding towards the tubless bathroom door. After reaching the other side, she violently slams the door behind her. Inuyasha immediately rushes to the door, right before Kagome locks it. Inuyasha knocks delicately on the door. Kagome exclaims with a sob in response, “Leave me alone!” Inuyasha calls out pleadingly, “Kagome…” “…I said go away, Inuyasha,” she exclaims again with a wail. Out of nowhere Kagome's mom comes bursting into the room. She utters quietly as she peers into the semi-darkness, “Kagome are you alright? I heard a noise.” As her eyes begin to adjust to the limited light in the room, suddenly she gasps, “Inuyasha,” before flipping the light switch on. She daintily flinches as she repeats again, gasping loudly, “Inuyasha?!” As Inuyasha stares at her like a deer caught in headlights, Kagome slowly begins to open the door before trudging out while dabbing underneath one of her eyes with a wad of tissue paper. Her mother asks with concern, “Kagome, did you know Inuyasha was here?” Kagome gazes at her for a moment examiningly as she remains silent, before redirecting her gaze towards Inuyasha. Inuyasha raises his eyebrows briefly as he gazes back at Kagome, hoping that she will change her mind about talking to him. Finally, after a few more seconds of suspenseful silence, Kagome utters with a hoarse whisper, “Yea, mom. We just need to talk. Everything's fine.” “Are you sure, Kagome,” her mother asks protectively. Kagome replies with slight exasperation in her voice, “Yes mom, I'm certain.” “Alright, Kagome…I guess I'll leave you two be. But you guys behave in here, alright? …And don't talk for too long. Kagome has to go to school tomorrow.” “Yes, Higurashi Sama,” Inuyasha replies respectfully. “Yes, mother,” Kagome answers insipidly. As Kagome's mother slowly closes the door, she leaves them both with an admonishing gaze.

 

After the door is closed, Inuyasha and Kagome just stand across from each other as they stare at each other tacitly. Finally, Kagome suggests, “Maybe we should go outside.” “Okay,” Inuyasha replies passively. After Kagome hops onto Inuyasha's back, he leaps out of her window, towards the ground below, before landing agilely and effortlessly. Kagome silently walks to the front of the house as Inuyasha leaps after her. Once they arrive, they end up standing across from each other, fidgeting bashfully as the awkward silence surrounding them prevails. Finally Kagome whispers as she continues to hold her head down, “How…how did you get through the well? Have you been trying?” Inuyasha whispers in reply, with his head down as well and his hands folded behind his back, “Yes. Practically every day…I don't know…it just…let me through I guess.” Just as quickly as words saturate the air, they soon cease, as everything returns to eerie silence. Inuyasha lifts his head in order to peer at Kagome as he begins to sense calamity stirring in the atmosphere. Without warning, Kagome thrusts her face up revealing the most vicious glower Inuyasha's ever seen on Kagome's comely face. “Sit, Sit, Sit,” she soon exclaims with fists clenched tensely to her sides, as Inuyasha goes crashing towards the earth below, three times in a row. As he lies down, body imprisoned on the ground in pain, she begins to rage with tears streaming down her face, “You're such a pervert! How could you sleep with your own brother! Did you really want to hurt me that much?! Well you did a SUPERB job, bastard!” Inuyasha whines helplessly and guiltily, “Kagome, I know it's fucked up-I can explain!” Kagome bights out, scornfully, “Explain?! How can you explain something like that Inuyasha?! In all my life I've never heard of something so disgusting! After everything we went through together…Kikyou's one thing but Sesshoumaru?! …Your own brother?! The same arrogant ass-hole who tried to kill you repeatedly-even if he wasn't your brother…!”

 

She stops berating Inuyasha momentarily in order to catch her breath as she wipes away some of her tears with her light blue pajama sleeve. At some point during that timeframe, Inuyasha acquires the courage to speak while still sealed to the ground, “Kagome, please listen to me…I…” “You what,” Kagome snaps back harshly as she interrupts him. Just like that, she replenishes her fuel and she's off, “You FUCKING bastard! You don't even deserve to speak right now! All I ever did was love you! I didn't deserve this! How could you let Sesshoumaru do what he did to me?!” “…I didn't know he was going to do that!” “…Sure you didn't. You know what, it doesn't even matter! You still slept with your own brother behind my back…!” With a voice wrenched with anguish, Inuyasha calls out, “Kagome,” but his attempt to get her attention falls on deaf ears as she continues to rain her acrimonious liquid down up him. “...What's wrong with you?! Are you some kind of freak?! Is it some kind of Yokai thing?! You were supposed to be with me…” Suddenly a bitter sob pierces the air, completely taking Kagome by surprise. She immediately desists with her merciless slaughter of Inuyasha's ego.

 

As Inuyasha continues to sob with his wailings being muffled by his lengthy Hitoe sleeve, Kagome stands in place, utterly speechless and sniffling, from the shock of seeing Inuyasha cry. After a few moments, she finally breaks from her freeze, before walking hesitantly over towards Inuyasha. She kneels down onto her knees beside him; with her legs tucked underneath her before lightly touching his shoulder as he continues to lie there, not sobbing as heavily anymore, but with his face still buried in his sleeve. “In…Inuyasha,” she vocalizes tenderly. Like a wounded little puppy, he lifts his head up gradually, turning it so that he can gaze up at Kagome with a dewy eyed expression. Kagome verbalizes guiltily, “I'm…I'm sorry Inuyasha. It's just that I was so angry. How would you feel if something like this happened to you?” Inuyasha continues to gaze up at her for a moment before suddenly snuggling his face into his Hitoe again. “Inuyasha,” Kagome calls out frantically, as her hand swiftly moves back over Inuyasha's shoulder once more, worried that Inuyasha is going to start sobbing again. But instead he begins to mumble with unexpected calmness, as he lifts his head up once more, with his chin rested against his Hitoe sleeve, “You don't understand Kagome…you don't understand.” Kagome remains quiet for a moment. “Inuyasha, I'm…I'm willing to listen,” she finally responds softly and compassionately. She stands to her feet, before holding her hand out as she says, “Come on. Let's go inside.” Inuyasha grabs a hold, before standing up with Kagome's assistance.

 

Afterwards, they both head into the house. Once they are back in Kagome's room, they both end up sitting down on her bed, with Kagome's left knee and Inuyasha's right knee pressing together, as they face each other with the lights on. As he begins to speak, he resists the urge to cup her delicate features in his hand as he replies remorsefully, “I never wanted to hurt you…I don't know if I can say this…” Kagome utters with encouragement, “It's okay Inuyasha. I got out everything I had inside of me already…I apologize for all of the mean things I said to you. I really desire to understand you now.” Inuyasha gazes at her for a moment with apprehension, before finally overcoming his fear and opening his mouth to speak. “Well…” he breathes out slowly with a trembling voice, before pausing with hesitation. “Yes,” Kagome urges him on gently. “…It's very (his eyes dart about briefly as he holds his head down, trying to think up the right word)…complicated.” “In what way, Inuyasha,” Kagome utters calmly. Inuyasha begins to address Kagome with shriveling posture, with his head held down slightly and his clammy hands cupped together, being nuzzled between his closed thighs. “Kagome…I've been intimate with Sesshoumaru for a very long time…way before I ever met you…or Kikyou.” There is silence momentarily. Then Kagome asks with restraint, “How…long?” Inuyasha hesitates before mumbling in reply, “Ever since I was twelve in Inuyokai years.” Kagome pauses before asking apprehensively, “You guys were…having sex?” Inuyasha mumbles again in reply, “We didn't have sex until I was fifteen…um…after my reawakening before Naraku was defeated. But we had been doing other things together…since I was twelve.” He stops there.

 

Kagome swallows hard, trying to keep the tears she wants to shed again, at bay. The pitch of her voice rises slightly as she asks her next question, “What…incited you to begin to have affectionate feelings for him?” Inuyasha gulps nervously before clearing his throat as he begins to go into a speech, “It's…It's complicated. Um…I first met…him…when I was four in Inuyokai years. It was the first time I remember him trying to kill me…at least that's what it seemed like he was trying to do. I used to go out alone into the forest, outside of the castle walls, despite my mom constantly chastising me about it, and warning me not to do it. That's how Sesshoumaru discovered me. He circled around me like a predator stalking his prey before finally leaving. I feared him from that moment on…but I was also completely fascinated by him at the same time. My mom found out that he was…trying to dispose of me…again…because she saw him one day when she was coming outside of the castle walls in order to find me. She screamed into the air, warning him to stay away from me. Then that night she told me who he was and why he hated me. She warned me to stay away from him. But I didn't want to listen and didn't really. After that day, I would go out into the forest just so that I could see him, and be chased by him and possibly killed. I always hoped that if I continued to go into the forest, he would eventually accept me…and love me…”

 

Inuyasha continues to go into detail about everything that had happened to him, involving his early life as well as his relationship with Sesshoumaru (but he leaves out a lot of the details, involving him and Sesshoumaru's sexual encounters. He doesn't want to hurt Kagome any more than necessary). After talking for about thirty minutes with Kagome periodically asking him substantiating questions, he reaches the time after he was reawakened. “…At first I thought that things would be different, sense I'd been sealed to the tree for so long, and had fallen in love with Kikyou before I was sealed as well. I hadn't seen Sesshoumaru for a long time before I was sealed. So I figured things were finally over for good. I was tired of being burdened with guilt and shame along with always believing something was seriously wrong with me for being in love with my half-brother…but then at the same time, deep down, I knew that I wanted to be loved by Sesshoumaru so desperately, that I could never completely break free from him. After I was unsealed, so much was happening that I didn't have time to search for him, and then he found me. It may not have seemed like it, but I was really affected by the things he was doing. It's as if he had forgotten about everything that we'd ever shared. I thought he was over me, and it frightened me tremendously. He didn't hold back like he used to…he actually melted a hole through my stomach and I eventually had to cut off his arm, which I never wanted to do. What made things more complicated was the fact that I was developing feelings for you as well. The idea of hurting you killed me to no end. After he helped me overcome my yokai blood, things started returning to the way they were, before I was sealed. We would find each other in the forest, and then watch each other from a distance…until…we climaxed. Our encounters became more intense, until finally, closer to the time of Naraku's defeat, I gave my body over to him.”

 

Kagome asks, “So all along, when you went away, it wasn't Kikyou you were going to see, but Sesshoumaru?” “Yes,” Inuyasha responds meekly. Kagome pauses for a moment in thought, before finally uttering in a contemplative tone of voice, “I still don't know what to think about it. I mean, if you were just in love with another man, that would be different…Inuyasha…It's hard for me not to believe that Sesshoumaru is taking advantage of you and has hurt you in some way, in order to make you afraid to leave him…” Inuyasha interrupts her, “No Kagome, It's not like that…! Yes, he's hurt me many times in many different ways, but I never decided to be with him because I was afraid of him and if anything I'm taking advantage of him too. You don't understand how good he makes me feel. It's like I'm addicted to him. He could be slamming me to a forest floor one minute and then having sex with me the next and I never object. I've never had a father to love me…I'm still trying to figure out things, and I still get confused sometimes (he sighs)…Listen, I never meant to hurt you Kagome. It's just that I've always had this connection with Sesshoumaru. I can't say whether it's right or wrong. It may be unusual, but it is what it is. You're right, you didn't deserve what happened, and I gave him a piece of my mind about it…I do still care about you and I don't want you to be in pain. I tried every day to get through the well. I was so afraid you would be so angry and disgusted with me, as I was with myself, and yet I still wanted to see you in order to tell you the truth and apologize for hurting you…Even if you don't understand, please forgive me, Kagome.” Kagome lowers her head as she directs her gaze downward before proceeding to speak softly, “As long as he is not hurting you or threatening you in order to force you to do things you do not want to do, I don't have to worry as much. The worst of everything for me is over…I have never heard of two male siblings being in love, but just because I've never heard of or seen it, doesn't mean it can't exist…It is unusual…but I realize that no matter how unusual it seems to me, you can't change who you love. Whether you want to be with Sesshoumaru or not is your choice. I can't make you be with me if you don't wanna be.”

 

They are silent for a moment, as Kagome clenches the cloth of her pajama pants, while gazing down at her lap. Eventually she looks up, before gently placing her hand against the side of Inuyasha's lowered face. He slowly gazes back up at her as he senses the touch of her soft, warm, hand. As she gazes into his eyes, she utters gently, “I forgive you Inuyasha...” She then peers into his eyes examiningly, before asking, “Do you love him…Inuyasha?” Inuyasha starts to feel anxious and is also caught off guard by her question. He swiftly turns away from her. She places her hand lightly against the back of his shoulder, “Inuyasha, you don't have to be afraid of what I'll think. I will be fine. I truly desire to hear the truth.” He fidgets with his fingers for a while before eventually getting enough confidence to turn back around, but not enough to look her in the eyes. Finally he utters, sheepishly, “Kagome… I… Yes, I do love him.” He chuckles quietly to himself before whispering, “I…love Sesshoumaru…the bastard.” With a bittersweet feeling emanating from her heart, Kagome partially purses her lips and turns down the corners, as she lowers her head briefly with melancholy and surrender.

 

 

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I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter…until next time.