InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The King's Mistress ❯ Memories of Happier Times ( Chapter 16 )

Historical Factoid:

 

Several of you have asked me why Inuyasha doesn't just ban Naraku from his court since he is, after all, the King. Technically…yes, he could, but even he (with his arrogant personality) is still sensitive to the will of the general public. Even though the King of a country in this era technically had the power to do anything he wanted, including sending people into exile or to prison (or the executioner's block, sad to say) without any apparent reason, most monarchs hesitated to do this for one simple reason: the fear that they would enrage the people of their country.

Even with all their power and grand wealth and status, Kings would recognize that they were vastly outnumbered if the general population decided to take over…case and point, the French Revolution. As such, any monarch would hesitate to do anything extreme without a good reason, or at least a good `fabricated' reason. Another historical example of this is, obviously, Henry VIII and his courtship of Anne Boleyn. He kept balance and harmony in his country until he divorced his faithful wife for no good reason to marry an apparent whore, and then further horrified his people by having Anne beheaded for no good reason other then his own desire to be free of her. England was never the same again, and you can be sure that many monarchs took note of this.

Since Inuyasha, as of yet, cannot ban Naraku for any reason other then his past history as a convict, for which he was officially pardoned, he has to wait. But never fear, he'll be trying to get rid of him…our hanyou doesn't give up that easily.

 

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Title: The King's Mistress

 

Author: dolphingirl0113

 

Chapter Fifteen: Memories of Happier Times

 

Rating: PG-13 (for language and, at times, implied sexual situations)

 

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, nor do I take credit for several of the historical ideas, facts, and realities I have taken and used.

 

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Who could have ever imagined that with one meeting our lives would be changed forever? How could any of us have known? How could Inuyasha have foreseen this when he pardoned the prisoner called Naraku? How could I have seen it coming when I made plans for stopping in the South? Or, if one wanted to get ridiculous with blame, how could the deceased King, Inutaisho, have seen what would come from him putting an innocent man in the Tower?

 

I learned much over the next few days. I forced myself into a rigorous course of learning all about what exactly had happened between Kikyou and this man called Naraku, formerly known as Onigumo. It certainly wasn't hard to ascertain that this was the man who had supposedly ruined her, as all the rumors said, but what I didn't understand was why my sister allowed him to affect her so much. Kikyou was normally such a strong person…why should one man change all that with just a look?

 

Either way, all I knew for sure was that suddenly our lives had been turned upside down, and what had once been a peaceful path to heaven for my sister had now become the darkest, most twisted road to hell there ever was. Rumors swirled about her former involvement with Onigumo, and some of the nobles even went so far as to place bets on how long it would take for Kikyou to succumb to her supposed desires and betray the King.

 

I pitied her. I had never felt sorry for her in my life, but suddenly I pitied her. As much as I hated the fact that I was falling hard and fast for a man that she had firmly in her possession, I still felt sorry for her, wishing I could make all her pain go away. No one deserved such a life, constantly looking over her shoulder while trying desperately to ignore the cruel rumors and gossip swirling at every turn.

 

The court's Golden Girl, Inuyasha's beautiful fiancée, had suddenly become the object of scorn everywhere she went, and it infuriated me to no end that men and women who had bowed respectfully to her mere weeks earlier would now treat her so cruelly. And so, for the first time in my life, I found myself stepping up to defend her, for I had meant what I said to Kagura that day. No one attacked my family and escaped unpunished…

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

Memories…

 

So many memories…

 

It was as though someone had put her entire life into a story and was now forcing her to relive every painful moment over and over again.

 

Kikyou felt her knees complaining from where she was forcing them to hold her weight against the harsh stone of the church floor, but she didn't care. Her hands tightly clasped, her head bowed, her lips murmuring ardent prayers, she had never felt so afraid. At that moment she wouldn't have cared if she was forced to pray on the sharp blade of a sword…anything to earn the mercy of God for what she had done and subsequently was being punished for.

 

Why now? Why here, in this cruel, unfamiliar palace, was Onigumo so forcefully thrust back into her life, his eyes full of hate and loathing as he looked at her? She shivered at the memory.

 

He had changed. The physical attributes were the most obvious. Where his hair had once been a beautiful chocolate brown, it was now even darker, and perhaps more feminine then she recalled in her mind. His skin was paler, but perhaps that was to be expected after having spent three (she shuddered at the thought) years in the dreaded Tower.

 

But the greatest change of all was his eyes.

 

Where once he had looked upon her with a warm, brown gaze that had been both teasing and loving at once, now all she saw were reddish irises full of the desire for revenge. Surely he couldn't hate her that much…could he? Surely he could find some trace of their old love, and forgive her? She had to believe so, for the alternative was too frightening to think about for too long.

 

She wasn't sure how long she'd been alone, though she figured it had to have been at least an hour since the rest of the court had risen following the Mass and left to go about their daily business. Inuyasha had offered to stay with her, but she had insisted he go, that she had to work through all this on her own, and so he had gone hunting with Miroku.

 

He was her fiancé, and she knew it hurt him deeply when she shut him out like this, but she truly didn't want him with her…not when her past was so near to her heart. She'd thought she'd gotten past all of this long ago, that she could forget her former love and move on. But clearly her heart was determined to hold on to the one man she could not, would not have ever again…

 

The sound of footsteps echoed behind her in the otherwise empty sanctuary, and Kikyou felt her head rise in confusion. The priests, she knew, were all in solitary prayer now, and the court was, mostly, on the hunt with Inuyasha. So who…?

 

“Kagome?” Why that was the first name that came to her lips, she did not know. Perhaps it was because, deep down (though she was unwilling to admit it) she wanted her sister's calm presence more then anyone else. Not Inuyasha. Not the false friends of the women of the court.

 

She wanted Kagome.

 

Smiling at the thought, Kikyou recalled how over the past three days since they'd first arrived, Kagome had been the only one who had instinctively defended her, protecting her from all the wild rumors spreading about Kikyou and her former lover, Onigumo, now known as Naraku. Kagome had criticized others, had reprimanded them for being so disloyal to the woman who would be their Queen, and even taken some cruel words herself. Yet, in the end, she still remained faithful, and Kikyou couldn't help but admire that. Kagome had always had that unique inner strength…

 

The sound of someone breathing caused her to clear her head, and Kikyou turned on her knees to see who was coming, and froze…

 

“Good afternoon, Lady Kikyou.”

 

She swallowed and tried to will some color back into her cheeks. “Good afternoon, Lord Onigumo.”

 

The man before her, painfully familiar and yet so distant and strange, chuckled, rocking back on his heels before slowly, almost mockingly, coming to rest on his knees beside her, folding his hands in supposed prayer. But she knew better the moment he spoke out of the corner of his mouth. “My name is Naraku now.”

 

“That may be, but you shall always be Onigumo to me.”

 

“The name Onigumo is something I want nothing to do with.” His voice was harsh, and she flinched.

 

“But that name…”

 

“Represents a man who was weak!” He hadn't meant to snap, to show such little restraint, but he couldn't help it in her presence, which was still so enticing. With a calmer voice, he continued. “He was a man who waited, helpless, for a woman to come to his rescue, and only a fool would count on the aid of a woman.”

 

Kikyou knew what he was referring to, and felt her breath hitch in her throat. “I wanted to come to you,” she found herself saying, all her resolutions about staying firm flying out the window in his presence. “I wanted to help. I never wanted to leave your side. But my friends…”

 

“Kept you away, I know.” He smirked. “Kaguya was the one who did the honor of informing me that the woman I loved, the woman I had sworn my life to, had abandoned me to the pits of hell.”

 

“I was young,” she managed to croak, her fingers tightening until they turned white around the tiny pearl rosary in her hands. “What else was I to do? I was being told that if I came to defend you, I would fall too. Kaguya and the others said you were doomed from the start, that there were too many accusations from your past to escape without punishment this time.” She turned her eyes, pleading, lined with tears, towards him once more. “I ask you…what else was I to do?”

 

His hand snapped out like that of a snake and grasped her wrist firmly, causing her rosary to fall to the floor with a loud clang. She winced, but he didn't seem to notice the strength of his grip. “You should have come and stood by the man you loved.” He sneered. “The man you claimed to love.”

 

She caught his meaning instantly and looked down. “I did love you! How could you ever think otherwise?”

 

“You left me to rot in the Tower while you went happily about your life. I heard all about your exploits in ensnaring the King, and how you finally got him to propose to you…playing the innocent, wounded woman.”

 

Kikyou flinched inwardly, knowing that much was true. She had sought to marry Inuyasha for status only, hoping that would stop all the rumors swirling about her and the relationship she'd had with a convicted criminal. But the rumors hadn't stopped…they'd merely been hidden behind curtains and restrictive hands.

 

“I did what I thought best to survive,” she finally replied.

 

“You did what was best for you,” he rephrased, squeezing harder.

 

Her eyes flared at that, and she met his gaze without restraint. “I know what kind of man you were, Onigumo…”

 

“Naraku...”

 

She ignored him. “And I know you would have done the exact same thing were our roles reversed. You may have loved me, but you were still selfish and always looking out for yourself before anyone else. So don't you dare presume to preach to me about morals and betrayal!” She wrenched her arm free of his grasp. “If you had truly loved me, you wouldn't have done all the other petty crimes that backed you into such a corner in the first place.”

 

“I didn't know you then,” He snarled back at her. “And so long as I was with you, I did nothing to taint my name or honor.”

 

“That's a lie and you know it.”

 

“Is it?” He stood up, and she rose with him, refusing to back down. All the anger, hurt, and despair she'd felt came flooding back, and Kikyou felt like a fight would do her some good. She was so tired of being the stoic woman who never let anything out.

 

“Yes,” she replied firmly. “I knew all about your little exploits up the river…the women you kept in the whorehouse…”

 

“And strangely enough that meant nothing so long as you had my love.”

 

“I was a fool then!”

 

“I didn't know you'd become one to quote clichés as excuses, Kikyou.”

 

“Don't you dare mock me.”

 

“I only speak the truth.”

 

“You forget to whom you speak.” She rose up to her full height, arching her neck elegantly, her chin proudly in the air, and in that moment, bathed in the sunlight spilling through the stained-glass windows, dressed in her gown of red and white, she truly looked every inch the powerful Queen she was destined to become. “I am Kikyou Higurashi, daughter of a Marquess, fiancée to the King, and soon you will be my suppliant.”

 

Naraku seemed unaffected, though he had to admit something akin to a spark he'd thought long dead was felt somewhere below the belt. God damn it all, why could she still have such an effect on him?

 

Moving forward, he cupped her chin delicately, almost reverently, in one of his strong hands, and she shivered as his breath touched her face. “I was your suppliant, my lady,” he all but whispered. “That weakling Onigumo would have done anything for you…for his pathetic love…and all I can say is I thank whatever God or Devil that helped me survive every day for the fact that I, Naraku, am free of your grasp.”

 

Kikyou looked deeply into his eyes and realized, for the first time, just how much damage she had done to him, and that Kaguya had been wrong…very wrong…to assume that he would `understand' and forgive her in time. This man would never forgive her; in fact, he blamed her for all of his unhappiness…not that she could truly blame him.

 

But what did that mean for her now? She was to marry the King and, surprisingly, at the thought of that being taken away from her, Kikyou realized that she wanted to marry Inuyasha. Was it because she'd finally come to love him? She doubted it. She'd sworn off love long ago when she watched her true love be locked away in the Tower. And yet Inuyasha represented safety and security, two things she desperately longed for.

 

“So what will you do to me now?” She found herself asking, his fingers still touching her chin. She had to resist the urge to melt into that touch which had once held so much power over her body and soul. “Kill me?”

 

He chuckled darkly. “Ah Kikyou, that would be far too easy.”

 

“What then?”

 

He leaned in closer, so that his lips were by her ear. “I want to hurt you, to ruin your life, the way you ruined mine. And then, once you are ruined, I want you to live with yourself every day and feel the betrayal of the man you loved.”

 

Her eyes flared at that last statement. “Inuyasha would never betray me. He loves me.”

 

Naraku threw his head back and laughed. “Don't pretend to think I believe for a moment that the pathetic hanyou King is the man you love.” He laughed harder when she blushed and looked away, not denying his statement. “And let me ask you this, Kikyou: do you honestly believe he loves you in return?”

 

“Yes. He told me so…” A long time ago, she admitted silently. He hadn't even mentioned love since she'd closed him off entirely from her heart, the day their engagement was signed and sealed. Did he still love her now?

 

Seeing her flicker of uncertainty, Naraku looked at her steadily. “Do you mean to tell me that you haven't even noticed the way his eyes wander when he is with you? Have you noticed to whom they wander? Or perhaps you refuse to see it, because the pain of the truth would be too much for you…”

 

Kikyou looked away at that, not because she was ashamed, but because she refused to let him see the truth of his words. She saw…oh God help her, she saw. And every time she saw them together a part of her wanted to die. And yet, she couldn't hate either of them, because while Inuyasha, she knew, was just a blind fool when it came to women, Kagome was deliberately putting up barriers for the sake of her sister, and that brought a warm sensation of love to Kikyou's heart.

 

“Whether he loves me any more or not is irrelevant,” she finally replied, willing herself to believe those very words. And, in all honesty, a part of her truly did. “He has signed a contract, as have I, binding us together. Our engagement pact has been signed by witnesses, and the wedding is being planned. By summer's end, I will be Queen.”

 

She thought she saw a flicker of something akin to pure jealousy flicker across his face, but then it was gone, and Kikyou wondered if she'd seen it at all as he pulled her face closer to his, his free hand putting an arm around her waist and squeezing tightly into her back. She refused to wince; refused to give in to his obviously threatening posture.

 

“Do you truly believe that will make you happy, Kikyou?” Naraku's voice was seductively charming, and in that moment she thought he could have charmed a nun into his bed.

 

“I do,” she managed to reply, her voice surprisingly firm.

 

“But you used to believe so much in true love…what happened?”

 

There was the sudden sound of a door being flung open, and the pair turned as one to see the younger Higurashi sister burst into the long hallway leading up to the alter of the chapel, dressed in a gown of pale green. For some strange reason, Kikyou felt like she was seeing her guardian angel, sent from heaven to steer her away from danger. And who knows…perhaps she was…

 

“Naraku,” Kagome hissed, her eyes narrowed dangerously, “Let go of my sister.”

 

He obeyed instantly and bowed low…mockingly low. “Ah, Lady Kagome, we were just talking about you.” He flicked his gaze at Kikyou momentarily. “Weren't we?”

 

Not wanting to give any reason for more rumors to spread, Kikyou just nodded. “Indeed.” She looked at Kagome, her face once more a mask of calm. “Did you not go on the hunt, sister?”

 

“No,” Kagome met Kikyou's eyes meaningfully. “I felt that my presence would serve a better purpose by staying behind.”

 

Kikyou nodded, understanding perfectly, and wanted to give a bright smile, but held back. So…Kagome saw the danger, and didn't trust Naraku to be left alone with her. Perhaps that was the way it should be.

 

Kagome looked directly at Naraku then, not even flinching in her gaze. “If you don't mind, my lord, I would like to speak with my sister.”

 

He nodded without hesitation, his voice cool and boding no goodwill. “Of course.” He started to walk back down the aisle, but just as he and Kagome passed one another he stopped and turned back to Kikyou. “You never answered my question, my lady…”

 

“About?” She feigned ignorance.

 

“Your happiness.”

 

Kikyou didn't hesitate, her voice strong and her posture erect. “My belief in true love died the day a man called Onigumo was locked away in his cell in the Tower.”

 

There was a long silence between them, broken only by Kagome fidgeting with her gown, before Naraku finally smirked and nodded. “I see.” And with that, he walked away.

 

The moment he was gone, the strength seemed to leave her, and Kikyou sagged against Kagome's small but strong frame in exhaustion. The younger Higurashi sister looked at her in concern. “Kikyou…are you alright?”

 

She nodded. “I just need to sit for a minute.” They sat down together on one of the kneeling stools. “How in the world did you know he was in here, Kagome?”

 

Kagome looked away, blushing sheepishly. “I didn't. It was just an instinct, I guess. I don't trust him, and because I know you have a history with him, I don't trust him with you. That's why I chose to stay behind today from the hunt. To protect you.”

 

“Indeed.” Kikyou had a thoughtful look on her face as she absentmindedly picked up her fallen rosary and tucked it once more into her waistband, which consisted of a white ribbon, the golden chain of the cross dangling out and down her skirts.

 

Kagome saw this and raised an eyebrow skeptically. “Since when did you become a God-fearing woman?”

 

“What?” Kikyou looked down and then chuckled. “Oh…I suppose the moment I realized that my sins truly could come back to haunt me, even after all this time.”

 

“And what did you do that was so awful?”

 

“Nothing really…”

 

“Then why should you be afraid of your sins?”

 

“Oh Kagome,” Kikyou looked away, feeling tired, but Kagome refused to give up. She wanted, desperately, to know what had happened between her sister and this strange, dark man who had joined the court.

 

“Please,” her voice was pleading. “Don't keep secrets from me any more, sister. If I am to protect you, I must know what I am protecting you from.”

 

Their eyes met, one pair wide-eyed and innocent, the other aged beyond their years from pain and tragedy. “And why should you, the younger sister, be protecting me, especially after all that I've done to you?”

 

It was the first time Kikyou had come close to admitting that she had treated Kagome poorly, and that caused the younger girl to smile in spite of the situation. “Because you're my sister, and sisters are obligated to help one another. Besides…I love you, Kikyou, and I always will.” She shrugged her shoulders. “You were the one I looked up to, admired, and wanted to be like when I grew up. That can't just disappear overnight.”

 

Kikyou laughed. “It's been nearly five years since we were ever truly close.”

 

Kagome shrugged again. “Then perhaps I just can't let things go.” They both chuckled before she turned serious once more. “Either way, I won't let him intimidate you, or hurt you. You're my family, and come what may, I love you. Now just tell me what happened…please?”

 

There was no demand in her voice, just a request, and, for some strange reason, Kikyou suddenly felt the walls around her heart collapse for the first time since she was fifteen years old and the world fell out from beneath her feet. She leaned her head back and, staring up at the large crucifix, began to put into words memories she'd hoped to never revisit again.

 

“His name was Onigumo back then. He was a nobleman of high birth, the son of a Duke actually, but that did nothing to help his reputation. It was said he could have any woman at court, and that there were few who had not fallen prey to his charms.” She smiled in spite of herself as she imagined a man with a warm laugh, chocolate eyes and flowing, shoulder-length brown hair. “I unfortunately was no different.”

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

The music ended, and Kikyou came up laughing, trying to catch her breath, though her restrictive corset was making that somewhat difficult. But that didn't matter so long as she was in the arms of the man before her, who was currently looking at her as though she were the most precious, beautiful woman in the world. She wondered how he managed such a look when he had danced with so many women that evening already.

 

It didn't really matter…not so long as her heart continued to beat so quickly within her breast, her spine tingling from the touch of his fingers as they guided her about the dance floor.

 

“Well, my Lady Kikyou,” Onigumo gasped, also out of breath, “Shall we have another dance, or sample the wine instead?”

 

Kikyou smiled flirtatiously. “Perhaps we can do both, my lord? I am thirsty, but then I should like to return to the floor.”

 

He threw his head back and laughed at that, a warm, rich sound that caused desire to spring up from a deep well in her belly. “Your wish is my command,” he finally replied, putting his hand liberally, almost possessively, around her waist and guiding her to the refreshments table where servers were trying to keep up with the demands for goblets of grape wine.

 

While standing off to the side, Kikyou watched her best friend and playmate since childhood, Kaguya, move towards her, her hips swaying in a carefully practiced manner designed to attract the attention of young, available men. She giggled to herself as she saw it working perfectly.

 

“What a lovely evening,” Kaguya finally commented as she stopped at Kikyou's side, though she meant to include Onigumo in the conversation.

 

“It is indeed,” the man replied boisterously, downing his goblet of wine in two short gulps…very unfit manners for a gentleman. But while Kaguya frowned in disapproval, Kikyou merely smiled in acceptance and turned a blind eye. If he didn't act so, then he wouldn't be the man she was so quickly falling in love with.

 

Finally, after several moments of uncomfortable silence, for Kikyou knew her friend did not approve of her beau, Kaguya stepped forward and inclined her head slightly. “Might I borrow your lady for a few moments? I promise to have her back for the last dance.”

 

He looked at her with a teasing glint in his eye, as though actually considering it, before finally nodding. “Oh, I suppose.” And with that and a brief kiss of her hand, he meandered over to speak with another group of young women, who were more then happy to welcome the charmer into their huddle.

 

As always, Kikyou tried to turn a blind eye to such actions, knowing it was merely a part of his nature; he was a flirtand something of a womanizer…but so long as she loved him, and he loved her, she was willing to forgive him for that. After all, if every woman reproached her man for having pleasures on the side, then there would be no marriages. That was just the way of things, and all a woman could be was blind, or else she would go mad.

 

Vaguely, through the haze of the wine and the pleasure of the evening, Kikyou finally became aware of Kaguya saying something to her. “You shouldn't allow him to touch you like that.”

 

“Like what?”

 

“As though he were your openly recognized husband.”

 

“And what exactly constitutes that kind of touching?”

 

Kaguya frowned. “You mean to tell me you don't notice how low his hand is on your waistor how openly he eyes you, as though you were a dessert to be devoured?”

 

Kikyou giggled innocently. “I notice…and I don't care. He loves me, and that's all that matters.”

 

“But has he proposed to you yet?”

 

She frowned, looking into her half-empty glass. “No.”

 

“Well then, until he does you should hold him off.”

 

“He has all but proposed to me, Kaguya. Look,” she held up her left hand, which displayed a large sapphire ring on her middle finger. “I wear his ring.”

 

“But have you plighted your troth yet?”

 

“Well…not exactly…”

 

“And what I'm saying is that men such as he needs a legal contractto bind him down before he'll commit to anything.” Kaguya sighed and pointed at the man in question, who was currently dancing with a young blonde. “You've seen him. He flirts with anything that resembles a woman.”

 

“And I don't see why that is such an awful thing,” Kikyou retorted, sipping greedily from her goblet. “The young prince's own best friend, Lord Miroku, is well known for being a womanizer in his own way.”

 

“Yes, but my Lord Miroku never takes his exploits any further then flirtation…at least not openly. Onigumo is all but treating you like a wife, without the binding contract. He buys you gowns, lavishes you with gifts, and takesyou to his home in the country for extended visits…” Kaguya sucked in a breath at that. “And how do you think that makes you look?” She paused, and Kikyou looked at her. “Like nothing more then his whore.”

 

Kikyou flinched. “I am no whore.”

 

“Yet you act like one when it comes to him.”

 

“I do not.”

 

“Kikyou, I know more then anyone the extent of your relationship with him.” She gave her friend a meaningful look, to which Kikyou blushed and looked away. But Kaguya would not be deterred. “I'm the one who leads you to his chambers at night and stands guard to make sure no one suspicious sees anything. I'm the one who delivers his rather…vivid…messages when he cannot meet with you. And I am the one who makes damn sure any rumors circulating are squelched before they can become a problem. So don't act naïve around me.”

 

Kikyou turned and looked her friend square in the face. “So what would you have me do, Kaguya? I love him…that's not something that can be helped. What would you have me do?”

 

Her friend took on a sympathetic look at that. “You must hold him at bay until he has agreed to be your husband; until you plight your troth before witnesses, and your engagement is officially announced.” She took her friend by the arms. “I mean it, Kikyou. He cannot touch you until this is done.”

 

Kikyou nodded, but already seemed to be far away as she watched Onigumo end his dance with the blonde and come back to her side, a charming smile on his face that caused her to melt. How was it possible to love so much, and in such a short time? Granted, they had now known one another for over two years, he having made her acquaintance when she debuted at the age of thirteen, and yet it seemed like such a short time.

 

He placed his hand in her own, and she sighed as she sether goblet down on a nearby windowsill. “I believe your minutes are up, Lady Kaguya,” Onigumo commented playfully before twirling Kikyou back into his arms and holding her possessively against his body. “Now it is my turn.”

 

Kaguya just nodded and frowned before giving Kikyou a meaningful look and walking away. The dance began, and all was forgotten as Kikyou felt him whirl her about the room, her body feeling lighter then air, her laughter ringing in every corner of her being. She was so happy…so very happy…and she knew, as he leaned forward to gaze meaningfully into her eyes, that she could refusehim nothing. Not even her dignity.

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

Kagome gazed at her sister for a long time as she spoke, not sure of whether to feel ashamed for her, or sorry. She had truly loved this man, this Onigumo, so much that she was willing to sacrifice everything, including her dignity, for him?

 

“I was a fool for loving him, I can see that now,” Kikyou continued, seeming to be lost in her own little world, still gazing steadily at the crucifix. She stopped and turned to look at Kagome with a tragic sorrow in her eyes. “But isn't love supposed to be blind like that? Aren't we supposed to love the ones we cannot, and should not have?”

 

Thinking of Inuyasha, with his strong body and beautiful amber eyes, Kagome chose not to respond to that question. “So…did you heed Kaguya's advice?”

 

Kikyou chuckled. “No.”

 

Kagome gasped. “You mean you…”

 

The older woman chuckled, though it had sadness behind it, and ran several fingers through her hair, releasing it from the ruby clasp that held it in place so that it was free to fall over her shoulders, covering her body down to her waist in raven-black strands. “I had been doing that with him for a long time, Kagome, this was nothing new.”

 

It was strange to hear her normally conservative sister speak so about her sexual relations with a man, and Kagome found herself having to work at getting her head around the reality that Kikyou, shy, conservative, honorable Kikyou, was not a virgin. The thought caused her to turn an even darker shade of embarrassed red.

 

Seeing this, Kikyou chuckled and touched her sister's shoulder. “What…is my life so horrible that now you are ashamed to own me as your family?”

 

“What?” Kagome looked up, her eyes wide. “No! Never! I just…well…” She looked down at her hands, which she was steadily wringing into knots in her lap.

 

Kikyou smiled kindly, all sarcasm vanishing from her face. “I know. You're still a country girl at heart. I shouldn't expect you to accept such information too easily, because then you wouldn't be you.”

 

Continuing to stare at her lap, Kagome nodded and finally forced her head to rise, meeting her sister's eyes. “So what happened then, Kikyou? You say you didn't heed Kaguya's advice…what came of that?”

 

Kikyou shrugged, as though trying to pretend it wasn't a big deal. “She was right, in the end. I just wish I could have seen that earlier; then none of this would have had to happen…”

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

The birds chirped noisily outside her window, and Kikyou smiled, reminded of the fact that a nest was being built on her windowsill. Dawn was just beginning to crawl in through the glass panes, and as she rolled over, she found her naked back stretching out against another solid form.

 

“Good morning,” Onigumo smiled and yawned at her, stretching his muscular arms over his head.

 

She smiled in return. “Good morning.”

 

He sat up, and the sheets pooled at his waist, barely hiding enough of him to be considered remotely modest…not that they worried about that any more in their relationship. “I'd best get going,” he finally commented, sounding regretful, and Kikyou reached out and touched him with her hand, noting the way the muscles of his arm responded to her touch.

 

“Must you go?”

 

He nodded and rolled over so that his feet were dangling off the bed. “Kaguya is no doubt angry that we made her stay outside your door all night.”

 

Kikyou shrugged. “I wouldn't be surprised if she went back to her own room once she realized you weren't coming out any time soon.”

 

He chuckled. “You must not be so thoughtless with her, my love…after all, she's done much to make our time together possible. Without her, we'd have been drowned in scandal long before now.”

 

Yawning and falling back onto the mattress of her bed, curling up to fight away the chill of the morning, Kikyou just sighed. “But why do we have to worry about such things at all, Onigumo?” He tensed, as she knew he would at the mention of such a topic, but she chose to continue anyway. “Why can't we get married, and end all of this secrecy?”

 

He turned and touched her cheek with his hand. “I told you why…because I need more time to earn a name for myself. A name worthy of being yours once we're married.”

 

She sighed and rolled away from him. “You always have such an excuse…”

 

“It's not an excuse, Kikyou. I truly want to make you happy, and the only way to do that is to earn some more money and respect in the eyes of the court and the King.”

 

“You're the son of a Duke…what more respect or wealth do you need?”

 

She felt him touch her shoulder, and tried not to melt under his skilled fingers, but was quickly losing the battle. This was how he always steered such conversations away from the point. “You know that my father's treasury is all but gone,” he finally commented, his lips next to her ear, and she shivered involuntarily. “I have to earn some of that wealth back before I can have any hope of making you a good husband.”

 

She sighed and allowed him to put his arms around her. “You will be my undoing,” she murmured. “Even Kaguya thinks so.”

 

“Kaguya?”

 

“Yes…she believes that you will never marry, and that in the end you will break my heart.”

 

He stiffened at that. “You don't believe that, do you Kikyou? You wear my ring, and I have sworn to marry you when I can. Please tell me you don't believe what Kaguya says.”

 

She rolled over onto her back so that she could look at him, and saw, for once, genuine fear in his eyes. Unable to resist, she reached up and touched his cheek with her hand gently. “A part of me wants to, because then I could leave you for someone else and justify it to my heart. But no, I don't believe her…and I have no doubt that will be my undoing.”

 

Onigumo's face relaxed at that and he chuckled, burying his head in her shoulder for a moment, inhaling the scent of her hair, before finally sitting back up and beginning to retrieve his clothes, which were scattered all over the room. “I won't let any harm come to you,” he finally stated as he pulled his shirt on over his head. “And I swear that we'll get married before the end of the year.”

 

Kikyou brightened at that. “Do you really mean it?”

 

He smiled. “Yes, I do.”

 

She nodded. “Then I'll believe you.”

 

“And you won't question my motives any more, or worry about what Kaguya does or does not say?” She shook her head. “You promise?”

 

Kikyou smiled brightly. “I promise.”

 

“Good.” He leaned down across the bed and planted one final, lasting kiss on her lips that caused desire to spring up anew within her. She had to resist the urge to pull him back down onto the bed and repeat what they had done the night before, knowing he had already risked much by staying so long.

 

“Good bye, my lord,” she called out as he opened her door.

 

“Good bye, my love,” he replied tenderly before shutting the door, and she could hear his retreating footsteps, along with the voice of Kaguya, who had stayed after all, reprimanding him as they walked down the hall.

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

Kikyou sighed and hugged her knees to her chest while Kagome looked on with pity in her eyes. “That was the last time I ever saw him. That afternoon he was arrested for having burnt a house in the city to the ground and subsequently killing four innocent people.”

 

Blinking, Kagome tried to bring herself back to reality, but had been so engrossed in her sister's story of love and loss that she had a difficult time doing so. “But why was he arrested? He was with you.”

 

“I know, but he had been involved in a lot of shady dealings…drugs and such…in his life, and I have no doubt that one of his old partners in crime purposefully pinned him as an `eye witness' just to set him up.”

 

“But why would they do that?”

 

Kikyou shrugged. “Revenge, I suppose…why else? He had walked out on that kind of life the moment he promised to marry me. That was why he had so little money left, because he'd squandered most of it in illegal dealings. I have no doubt his partners were angry with him for that, and wanted to get back at him for abandoning them. Onigumo himself admitted to me, once or twice in a moment of weakness,” she smirked, “Usually when he'd had too much wine, that one did not simply walk out on men like that.”

 

“But he did anyway?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Why?”

 

“For love of me…or so he claimed at the time.”

 

Kagome narrowed her eyes and cocked her head. “You don't believe any more that he loved you?”

 

Kikyou sighed. “I don't know. At the time he seemed genuine and honest enough. But I was so naïve back then. Who knows what the truth was.”

 

Watching her sister, who suddenly looked so lonely and helpless, Kagome felt a great swelling of pity rise up in her heart, and she reached over to touch Kikyou's hand tenderly. The sister's eyes met. “I know he broke your heart, Kikyou, and that you broke his…but I have to believe this: if he could hate you this much now for abandoning him, then he must have loved you. For if you hadn't meant so much to him, he would have forgotten you long ago in his years in the Tower.”

 

Kikyou couldn't help but smile slightly at that. “I suppose that's true.”

 

“So what should we do now?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Well,” Kagome looked away, searching for the right words, “The rumors will only get worse, I have no doubt. What do you want to do about those?”

 

Kikyou shrugged her shoulders. “There's not much to be done about rumors, Kagome. People will say what they wish, and no one can stop them.” She chuckled bitterly. “It is their god-given right to speak the truth…so long as it isn't treasonous to the King.”

 

“Inuyasha could make it treason to speak out against you,” Kagome offered, though she knew it was a stupid remark to make. “After all, King Henry VIII of England has put out a decree ordering a court marshal for anyone who dares to speak out against his mistress, Anne Boleyn.”

 

Kikyou nodded at that, but shook her head a moment later. “You can't stop people from thinking though, Kagome. And it would be much better for Inuyasha to not exercise his power as King in this instance. If he were to do so, it would only reflect worse on me, for it would give the court reason to believe that the rumors are true.”

 

“Yeah, I suppose so…” Kagome trailed off into silence, trying to figure out what she could do to help. “So what can I do to help?”

 

At that Kikyou looked up and her eyes turned absolutely serious. “You can stand by my side no matter what others say about me.”

 

“Of course…”

 

“No, Kagome, I mean no matter what. I mean you'll defend me even when such awful things are said about me that you'll be disgusted and tempted to believe.”

 

“I understand, Kikyou…”

 

“No, you don't.” Kikyou sighed and, for the first time in years, touched Kagome's cheek with all the tenderness she had once possessed. “The court is a fickle beast, little sister. And if things get too far out of control, then its hostility will turn on you as well.”

 

“On me?” Kagome hardly believed that. But Kikyou looked so serious… “Truly, Kikyou?”

 

“Yes. Truly. They will hate you for loving me. That is the nature of the court of a King. They will slander anyone above them if it means watching that person fall.”

 

“So what can I do? Nothing but defend you?”

 

“You can help keep my reputation steady; dispel the rumors as much as you can, and speak on my behalf whenever given the opportunity. No matter what happens, you must help me ensure that my wedding to Inuyasha goes through as planned, and that the rumors of the court don't taint his mind against me.”

 

“Inuyasha…?” Kagome breathed his name, and suddenly felt her resolve falter somewhat. All the tender feelings she felt for him, all the memories she had of him smiling at her, holding her as they danced, telling her she smelled nice…she looked away, unable to say any more.

 

Kikyou saw her hesitation at that, and had to swallow back her own hurt upon realizing how much her sister had come to care for her fiancé. But she knew, deep down, that it wasn't Kagome's fault, and that it had not been her choice to fall in love with a man who was already spoken for.

 

“Kagome,” she tried again, her voice gentle, “You ask me what you can do, and I'm telling you.” She forced their eyes to meet. “You must help me see my marriage to Inuyasha through to the end. We must put this rivalry of ours to an end, sister. We must…”

 

Her eyes were pleading, and Kagome felt herself jolt back to reality. Did Kikyou know? Had she always known?

 

But before she could reply, the doors to the chapel opened once more, this time to reveal Sango and Miroku, who were laughing jovially about something. When they spotted the pair, it was obvious they had found what they were looking for.

 

“Kagome!” Sango moved forward quickly, but stopped short when she saw Kikyou, her hand still on Kagome's cheek. “Good evening, my lady,” she addressed formally before looking back at her longtime friend once more. “It's time for dinner, and both Kouga and the King wonder where you are.”

 

“Dinner?” Both Higurashi sisters spoke at once, glancing up at the window to see that, in fact, the light had changed, darkening to that of dusk. Kagome smiled and nodded. “Of course; we're coming. Kikyou and I were just having a pleasant discussion about her upcoming wedding.”

 

Kikyou caught on to the lie instantly and nodded as both rose to their feet, smoothing their gowns. “That's right. I needed her advice on what I should put in my bouquet.”

 

“Of course,” Sango nodded, clearly not believing a word, but knowing when to shut up and just accept what she was told. Kagome was grateful for that, and reminded of why this woman had been such a good friend for so long.

 

The large dining hall was full of people already, but Kouga had managed to save Kagome a seat at his side while Kikyou ascended the steps to her seat of honor beside Inuyasha, who gave her a curious stare before glancing over at Kagome, who merely looked away, unable to meet his gaze. She knew her eyes were an open book to her soul, and couldn't have him seeing the turmoil currently within her breast; that would spark far too many questions for which she didn't have any answers.

 

It wasn't a formal banquet, which meant people were free to sit where they chose, and everyone was conversing in pleasant tones, save for one man, who was sitting at the end of the long table looking rather sour. Kagome did her best to ignore Naraku and the way he kept looking at Kikyou as a server put a bowl of soup before her while another filled her goblet with wine.

 

As everyone filled their goblets, their eyes turned expectantly towards the head of the table, where it was tradition for the host of the court while on Summer Progress to make a small toast honoring the King. Obliging her role, Kagura dutifully rose from her seat to Inuyasha's left and raised her glass.

 

“It is my pleasure to host the King and his court in my home, and I wish him great health and much happiness in his upcoming wedding and all the years that follow in his reign.”

 

Everyone murmured assent to that and tipped back their goblets, though Kagome felt the wine tasted sour on her tongue. It was the exact same speech Kagura had made for the past three nights, which showed she was clearly not interested in making anything interesting or honorable.

 

She heard someone murmur something about the way Naraku was staring at Kikyou, wondering if the future Queen noticed or enjoyed such attention, and suddenly, without realizing what she was doing, rose to her feet, her goblet in hand, her fingers shaking with sudden nervousness. The entire court turned as one to look at her, and she tried to fight back the clenching of her stomach.

 

She could have chosen an easier way to do this, but…

 

“I realize the toast has already been made,” she spoke with a confidence that betrayed none of her inner insecurity, “But I would just like to say one more thing.” She swallowed, knowing the path she was about to take, and that it would not be an easy one. “It occurred to me that I have not once, in my role as the Summer Maiden, done anything to honor my sister, the future Queen of this country. And while a mere toast cannot make up for such a grievous oversight, I can still try to make it up to her somehow.” She turned to Kikyou, and refused to allow her eyes to meet Inuyasha's, for she knew if she did she'd lose her nerve and sit back down.

 

Raising her glass, she forced a smile to come to her face. “And so I'd like to propose a toast to my sister Kikyou Higurashi, who has proven to me, and to all of us,” she allowed her eyes to roam the entire table meaningfully, “That no matter what the mistakes of the past, we can still right our wrongs and turn out to be good people in the end.”

 

It was hardly a cryptic message, but Kagome hadn't meant for it to be, and so, as the rest of the court murmured a `here, here', and as she took a sip from her glass, she watched as Kikyou gave her the most loving smile any sister could muster, mouthing a `thank you' before sipping form her own goblet.

 

As for Inuyasha, he had a look of such admiration that Kagome couldn't help but notice, and had to force herself to look away quickly for fear of showing him that her heart was, slowly, breaking within her breast. He couldn't understand, nor would anyone else, that she had just promised her sister that she would help in any way she could to make sure her wedding went off without a hitch. She had sworn to Kikyou that she would defend her honor no matter what…and in doing so, had forsaken her own heart and trampled on any chance she'd had of having the man she was falling in love with.

 

Looking back down at her soup and shakily dipping her spoon into the warm liquid, Kagome was not surprised when a tear dropped into the bowl, causing a slight ripple. She had no doubt there would be many more tears such as this…

 

But at least it could never be said that Kagome Higurashi ignored her duty or went back on her word…no matter what the cost to her own heart.