Original Stories Fan Fiction / Realism Fan Fiction ❯ When Dreams Fade ❯ Hana is "dead" ( Chapter 10 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Author's Note: Short chapter, sorry. It had to be. The next one should be longer, but…I am dreading writing it. It will also be pretty much the end.

When Dreams Fade

Chapter Ten

Hana's trial was scheduled in a week. Her parents and my parents finally relented after a few days to let me spend time with Hana. I needed that time with her, and so did Hana, I think. She still wasn't the same. She had become disillusioned with life.

“Nobody cares about us as people,” she told me, while we were sitting in her room. “They want to make me out to be some kind of monster or something. I didn't know that people were so cruel, Alana. I don't even know…are they right? Am I a monster?”

I shook my head. “You did what was right. He would have killed Erik…”

Hana looked at me. Then she shook her head. “But…it wasn't the first time I wanted to kill someone…It was the first time I acted. I didn't want to just stop him, Alana.” She closed her eyes. “I wanted to kill him. And I did. He…he didn't actually come after Erik.”

“What do you mean?” I asked. “He beat Erik up, and you all said he was coming after him when you hit him.”

“No. He…Nikolas was trying to comfort Erik. Erik was too scared to know what was happening. The knife was in his pocket, Alana. I killed him because I wanted to. Not self-defense.”

“You're wrong, Alana,” I told her. I was practically pleading with her. “Nikolas did see. You've just let what the police and the reporters said get to you. Hana, you're not a murderer. You're not.”

Hana looked at me. Her eyes were distant, like her mind was in a completely different place. “Really?” she asked. “I don't know if I should believe you.”

I left Hana's house in a daze. It wasn't Hana in there. Hana was dead…the Hana I knew was dead, anyway. I wanted revenge against the people who had taken her from me. But I couldn't do anything…all I could do was knock on Nikolas's door and hope that he could help me.

“Alana?” he asked. He stepped outside and held my arm, leading me to the lawn chairs in front of his house. “Alana, you're shaking.” He sat next to me. “What happened?”

“It isn't her, Niko,” I mumbled. I must have said something else after that, but I can't remember what it was. I just remember Niko hugging me and whispering something. Then he sat down again.

“What do you mean, `It isn't her'?” he asked when I was a bit calmer.

“Hana…the real Hana…it's not her. This isn't her. Hana's dead.” I wasn't making sense. I had always been a rational person. Nikolas was the same way. I knew he wasn't comprehending what I said, but I couldn't explain.

“Of course it's her, Alana. Hana's fine. She's not dead. She's just…confused…” He frowned. I was shaking my head. “She's not fine?” he asked.

“She's dead. Her personality's dead. It's not coming back.” I took a deep breath. Think. Put it in words he'll understand. “Niko, she thinks she's a cold-blooded murderer. A killer. A monster. She thinks she's evil.”

Nikolas frowned. “What?”

I told him what Hana had told me, about intending to kill him. Nikolas shook his head.

“If his knife was in his pocket, why was he holding it when she knocked him out? She's distorting the truth. Maybe the police did it in their interrogations or something. She's impressionable. Maybe it was implanted in her head…you know, like a false memory…”

I nodded. “I think so. But either way…I don't think we'll get our happy, bubbly Hana back.”

He sighed. “I think you're right.”

How right we were…I'll never forgive whoever killed Hana's spirit. I thought that she couldn't get any worse. I thought that things had to get better. Hana had already been through so much. But I was wrong.