Crimson Regret

Part IV: Let Me Forget

Yugi's POV

I hate life. Don't you?

Well you might at some point because everyone must hate something so why don't you hate life?

Oh well I guess life must be going great for ya huh? I guess everyone can have anything they ever really wanted. Like this stupid 'true love' crap? It isn't even worth it. I'm not discouraging anyone; I'm just saying my opinions. You all have your own and you can stick to it.

This week is something else. I've gotta tell ya, it's been hell. Aya, dumb bitch, excuse me, is spending more and more time with Yami. I'm starting to think some chemistry is going on. If this continues well then Yami can say good-bye to his 'aibou' forever. Maybe I should contact Ryou if he wants to go to America or China or maybe even another city. I don't care if it takes my life savings I'm leaving. And plus I need a companion.

You know I thought he would reject me when I cut him at the back of his hand in Home Ec. class. But when he didn't I knew he was having problems too. My guess would be Taki seeing Bakura. Though I don't know if it's official, like Yami and Aya. I don't particularly care but when someone makes a promise isn't it that they're not supposed to break it so that way the person they promised won't trust them anymore? What's that old saying? Oh yeah…

"Promises are made to be broken."

Forgot who said that. But anyways isn't that true? No one has ever kept his or her promise at all. It will be years when they decided which is more valuable, their life or the life of another. Personally, I say the other. There's no reason for me to be here. I'm doing nothing except going through the same cycle everyone goes through. First is be raised and go to school, then pass college, then get a job, then live for another few years or so after retirement, and then you die. Simple as that. But it's so funny how everyone tries to save your life. It must be because they don't want to be saddened. They'll get over it in a few years. Dead people are so fortunate. I'm jealous.

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You know listening in this science class I find interesting. I wonder do you believe that scientific studies are always the answer? Well I don't. Because how the hell can science solve all problems? Did you see past experiences? They sometimes failed and they miscalculated because they think they're right after they test it three times and they don't even think of the dangers. That is so funny when they blow themselves up.

Oh, uh…sorry, my bad. I'm just joking. Though I guess they say they're doing it for the good of humanity. But then again it's sad the plants and animals don't get a say in it.

Hmm…what should I do now? Should I spy on Yami and Aya and sabotage it or should I go over to Ryou's house and we could self-mutilate like there's no tomorrow because I know he's into it now, if he isn't he'll join me soon enough. Maybe going over to sabotage Aya and Yami. They deserve it. Maybe I might run into Ryou on the way and I could avoid that. I should just go to Ryou's; at least it would be a lot more fun. I think I'll kill some time by disturbing Aya and Yami. I could meet Ryou on the way there.

Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily life is but a dream…

Oh great I got a children's sing-along stuck in my head. Oh well at least it's true. Life is but a dream. Okay I think I'm starting to lose it. Maybe if I can make myself get amnesia. That should work, but then everyone could alter my life so much. Grrrrrr…then maybe I should pretend! Ryou and I could see how everyone will react to it. Yes that's a good idea.

"Yugi look out!" I heard someone call my name before I saw some stupid car that won't stop because it kept speeding. Maybe I should just stand here. I felt myself being grabbed but before we could get away the car hits us both and we roll on the street. I hit my head. Did that hurt. I felt consciousness leaving me, and the next thing I knew…was nothing.

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Damn lights! Who the hell decided to wake me up at this hour? And where the hell am I? I slowly opened my eyes and sat up getting a major headache in the process. All I see are white walls so this must be a scary hospital right? I've got to confess. I hate staying in hospitals. They give me the creeps.

Of course this weird thing happened. There was this guy, who looked about the same age as me and looked like me, weird huh, came up to me and said my name. I didn't know who the hell he was. Was he the one who caused me to be in this hospital?

"Yugi are you alright?" he asked.

"I think I am. I don't mean to be rude but who the hell are you?" I asked. I saw his face go into shock. I'm not faking it, I don't know who the hell this guy is! There's this girl behind him too. Are they together or something? How the hell does he know me?

"Yugi, it's me Yami," he said. Yami, Yami… Hmm…that name does ring a bell but I don't know. Somehow hearing his name is making me hate him. Did he do something wrong?

"Okay, what's her name?" I asked.

"Her name's Aya. She's just a…friend. You don't remember anything?"

"No. I don't I'm sorry."

"Yami, the doctor said that visiting time is up. They want us out now," Aya said. I looked at the clock and it was true visiting hours are up but I didn't like the tone of her voice. It's as if she didn't even want to be here. I admit I wouldn't but she sent me an evil look before leaving with Yami. Maybe this is all a bad dream and I just don't remember what happens in the real world. I should just sleep it off. Yeah just sleep it off.

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I'm making progress with my mind. The doctor said I have temporary amnesia and said that it might come back pretty soon. Well there is no pretty soon. Here's what I got so far. Yami and I are together and that my only friend is Ryou, who saved me from getting flattened out, like a pancake. Then my grandfather died and I live upstairs in a game shop. That doesn't sound surprising.

I was wondering if Yami and I are together then why didn't he save me from being a pancake. He told me he wasn't there and Ryou just happened to be passing by and took me out of the way a little. And right now Ryou is walking to school with me instead. Maybe he was just lying. Somehow I think that's the truth. So far I've only talked to Ryou and Yami was usually never around. I asked Ryou about it and he said just follow Aya.

Aya was that girl at the time in the hospital. Maybe I should. I can trust Ryou because he never lied to me once. I can guess Yami lied to me a few times this whole time I've been forgetful. Maybe Yami really is with Aya and is just saying something so maybe I won't kill myself. Ryou mentioned that I used to be a cutter until Yami told me he loved me. I find I can't remember once when he said that.

"Ryou, is Yami really lying to me?" I asked him.

"I think he is but you can believe for yourself," he answered a bit forlorn.

"Why can't you give me a straight answer?"

"Because your decisions are not mine to make."

That guy is really depressed I wonder why.

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Kinshin: I apologize everyone that this is so short but I thank you people for your reviews and visits! Oh and don't worry the angst should be around in the next chapter. I'm trying to make this depressing as I can.

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